Losing sanity

I love my best friends girlfriend

soul.

Don't patch me up, don't say I'll be fine
I've been fakin' smiles like it's part of the grind
I bite my tongue 'til it leaks regret Still taste your name in every fuckin' cigarette
You pray for me? Just save your breath
I'm too far gone I flirt with death Scratches down my arms like a symphony
But every note screams, "Just let me be"

Let me bleed, don't hold me tight I was born in the dark, not made for light
Don't call it drama, this pain is real
Don't tell me to heal what I don't wanna feel

They say, "it gets better," yeah? Eat shit
I've been stuck in the same hell every fuckin' minute
My room's a morgue with the curtains closed
A graveyard of texts I'll never expose

I laugh when I'm hurt, that's my cue
To pretend I'm okay while I'm breaking in two
Go play hero, go save someone else
I built this cage, I made this hell

I don't want peace, I want release Let me rot in my own goddamn piece
Of mind, of soul, of shredded skin
Don't let the light in—I won't let it win

let me bleed

I brushed my teeth ‘til they bled last night
Tried to scrub out everything that didn’t feel right
Tried to sleep in silence, but the walls just breathe
And they know all the shit that I won’t ever leave

I peeled my skin like it wasn’t mine
Stared at the mirror like it owed me time
You said, “You’ve changed,” but I never did
I just stopped pretending I wanted to live


There’s a version of me that laughs at the pain
But he’s buried somewhere in the back of my brain
And the mask I wear fits way too well
They don’t notice I’m gone ‘cause I fake it so well

I talk like I’m fine, I walk like I care
But most nights I’m just gasping for air
I’m not broken—I’m just out of place
Like a scream with no face


I keep receipts from things I never bought
Souvenirs from wars I never fought
I keep your texts like a shrine of lies
They rot in my phone while the battery dies

I’ve been choking on dreams that don’t come true
Feeding myself the ghost of you
Maybe I’m nothing, but at least I’m loud
At least when I crack, I don’t draw a crowd


I’m the itch that never goes away
The stain that bleach won’t wash away
I’m the joke at the end of the script
The last scene that they always skip


There’s a version of me you might’ve loved
Before I got swallowed by all this stuff
Now I just sit in a shell and blink
Try not to feel, try not to think

I don’t like the body I’m in

can you find me 
in my bed where i lay ?
ill still be here
at the end of the day ^^
dont let me change
i still love it hereeee
i cant be bothered
im a teenage loserrrr

i dont wanna think
i js wanna do drugs :P
i dont wanna drink
cuz that shit sucks
have you heard what they say ?
that youre going insane
that theres smth wrong
inside your brain

so kick me around
like a tin can
cause i deserve it
im such a bitch man </3
youre tempting me
but i wont bite
me vs you
you win that fight

i dont
no i dont
no i dont know
one bad thing and ill start to go
one bad song and ill go to hell
leave me alone know im doing well

cause im a dirtbag
and theres mattes in my hair
dont wanna brush them
cause they make people stare
youre kinda shitty
youre just like me
all that to say
youre kinda frightening


teenage loser (ALL PLATS)

too far gone

stray (feat. gyaru)

happy little nightmare

i cant keep up

https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/spawncamped/left-behind

I never get it right
You fail me and my life
You weren't there for the ride
Not like I didn't try
(But I still say its fine)
Not like I didn't try
(I sit here and I cry)
Just one more left behind

(I'm lost again
There's nowhere left to run to
It's not the same without you
It's not the same without you)

Want you back, it's wishful thinking
I don't know what the hell you're seeing in me
You break my bones until I'm empty
I wake up and this awful feeling's inside

And now I hear the truth
Everything is you

stream

left behind

SWAT

red eyes

I recorded this for a label who are creating a compilation album with all the money going to support palestine ill put a link when they release it since its only on bandcamp

with the sun in my eyes,
temporarily blind,
in the light what will i find.
obscured by the light,
i can’t see but it’s not night,
and nothing’s alright.
with hope in front of me,
my mind still atrophies,
so what will i be.
nothing that i can see
i cant see past the dark,
because the truth is stark.
i’ll let time tell,
and right now it says its hell.

nothing is wrong,
it’s just taking so long,
and success feels like a con.
the measures don’t apply to me,
so how can i be happy,
that’s what i’ll never be.
but we’re forced to anyway,
and we have to every day,
strive towards a false goal,
and get sad and old.
the truth is a lie,
i follow and with no clue why,
but there’s no time to stop,
or you’ll lose to the clock.

let me bleed

lain. @blindbylain

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