Dec 18

f(ast)uck tesco

play with me

the source

spaceward

instrumental: I'm Doin' My Thang, Gramatik
recorded & mixed by Mike Spits, EQ

LYRICS:

listen closely, i’m about to offer up 
a comprehensive account of all the mommas i fucked
a compilation of my copulation with the momma population 
from atop the tallest tower to the bottom of the basement 
it's a common conversation far as i’m concerned 
cuz i fucked every momma everywhere around the world 
from manhattan to pakistan and then back again
except the handful of nations impacted by the travel ban

i fucked ya momma yo
i beat the odds and stuck my cock into like half of the globe 
and all of the ladies that gestated life
i’m mackin on those
they carried babies
now they lay me 
make my package explode
gross
i fucked ya momma yo
i gave her plenty d
she gave you 23 of ya chromosomes
this is an overdose 
of poetic yo momma jokes
so settle in, I’m milking this milf bit, geronimo 

i fucked ya momma
in the rough
like a diamond
stuck it up her butt
then i nutted on her eyelids
i fucked ya momma on my own private island 
took a private jet 
got her wet with my privates
i fucked ya momma 
in the middle of the ocean
in the belly of the whale
sprayed my load all over both tits
i fucked ya momma
then she gave me a promotion 
she's promoting from within
cuz my dick is in her oh shit 

i fucked ya momma yo
i'm sleeping with her 
but she didn't bring pajamas though 
cuz she sleeps in the buff 
with her teeth round my nuts
then I stuff yo momma like she was an envelope
i fucked ya momma on a pile of forever stamps
don’t need to lick her even cuz yo momma’s hella damp
but obviously i go down on her 
then i go to town on her
then i fuck the rest of the town
cuz I’m the momma champ

i got a momma fuckin fetish
i sandwiched two meaty mommas on a bed of lettuce 
i ate ya momma’s pussy cuz she said i had to finish
that before i ate dessert
you know how mommas be gettin
over protective 
i fucked your momma at the dentist
she took me for a cleaning 
put my penis in her, then split 
i fucked yo momma on the court after a game of tennis
when she needed an abortion, drove yo momma to the clinic 
and i fucked her there
yo momma sucked my dick through the hole in my underwear
I say yo momma, cuz as far as names go I am unaware 
what yo momma’s name is
this isn’t momma dating
this purely momma fuckin 
on a no name momma basis 

i fucked yo momma
why?
cuz no one told me not to
now i run a momma brothel 
all for me
they always offering 
to make waffles
i fucked a billion
ladies who have raised children
lately i get the feeling
i’ve become a soulless momma-fucking villain 

huh
strange 
i feel nothing
i fucked ya momma 
then I busted on her stomach
a couple months ago this was a rush
but something changed
i’ve adjusted 
now my pulse is barely budging 
i fucked ya momma on a dragon in a dungeon 
ya momma loved it, but for me it wasn’t fun it’s dime a dozen 
this is the hero’s repercussion
bestowed the ultimate boon
but low and behold 
got multiple poon 
suddenly it’s joyless
it feels pointless
nevertheless
i fucked yo momma
on a toilet 
i fucked yo momma 
in a pond filled with koi fish 
i fucked yo momma 
with the antidote
my dick is  poison

I Fucked Yo Momma

FUCK TESCO

Tha Dog Song

A rap to say farewell to Harmontown by William Sebag-Montefiore - Twitter  @ wsebag

Lyrics:

I fucked your momma, yeah, only tryna be truthful
Call that a crutch, motherfucker, crutches are useful
We comin’ to the end now what have we learned?
We’re here having changed so it’s time to return
 
Like a 24 carat piece of ice have ya heard
I’m a titanic nerd call me Adam Goldberg
I am rushing the stage, nobody controls me
I’m a Russian on stage, call me Anatoly
 
I’m dying on the inside like a Eucolyptus Tree
Feel like Curtis Armstorng just screamed out ‘agony’
What do I do with this sand pollution?
I grab my self a bucket and then get to poopin’
 
I’m sad cause Harmontown is soon to be gone
Unlike Dan’s dick it’s been going so long
So if MC John came to mow the lawn
I’m here to cut the grass with a nuclear bomb
 
I’m a true crime fan, you want a true crime, man?
The truest crime of all ain’t listening to Dan
Got my dick in a soup can, a sharpie in my hand
My lyrics they will kill like a Chinese van
 
Spencer got big balls, giant D & D
Makes me go bananas like Ron Jeremy
He tweeting about Hamilton and Aspy D
On that world wide web - syndactyly 
 
Go to bed with Jeff Davis, watch as I tuck him in
Later I am fuckin – and I mean fuckin him
He turns to me, he says can I spank you
I look into his eyes, all I can say is thank you
 
I hob nob with Rob Schrab he tells me one thing
It should have been called fuckin lord of the ring
I have an iPad but please don’t tweet me
I got it at a discount cheapy peepy
 
That Brandon Johnson is a handsome fellow
I’ll snap a shot of him like I’m Mike Crivello
I got money in the bank, yo, just ask the teller
I write so good yeah I give them Heller
 
I’m wearin’ me-undies, I’m winnin wid brooklinen
I’m whipping out my quip and that is why I’m always grinning
I say I’m done with rappin and then I come back and stun
It’s the lyrical equivalent of buying a gun
 
And some people call me pringles dick, I tend to get that shit a lot
It ain’t at all about penis warmth, just once you pop yo you just can’t stop
 
I'm going round in circles like I'm chasing a chevy 
Poop is forever money’s only temporary
Cut down on carbs I can see what he meant 
Don’t fill up on bread that’s the fourth agreement
 
It’s comin to an end yo and I wanna cry
Bro listen up though, you’re shoes untied
I did not know how to finish this line
Uh huh huh huh uh huh huh huh huh
 
Bagel or bagel, the debate goes on
Hey, words, get off my lawn
I’m a poet and a rapper perfect feet in the verse
My shoes spit too cause they like to converse
 
This is Harmtontown so just take that frown
And let Demorge Brown turn it upside down
I’ma finish this line then y’all start clappin’
We made it to the moon: that happened

How Do You Know When Your's Finished (Fuckin' Mommas)

How Do You Know When You're Finished (Fuckin' Mommas)

How Do You Know When You're Finished (Fuckin' Mommas)

WilfSebag