i could never be ready

im back bitches, vroom vroom in my new depression. 

There will be more like this to come, so stick around if you like it :) 

//Lyrics:

You probably know 
It's not that easy
When every one around is 
Bright colours and Happiness.
 
Now this is not excuse,
It's a hand me down 
For every one who's also like this.

Sometimes I get sad 
About everyone 
I never stayed in touch with.

But Its silly being sad 
If you're the one 
Who never stayed in touch with 
Everyone you miss now.

It's hard to explain 
When you can't trust yourself to be honest.
So I kept myself away 
From all you kindness,

So that it won't go to waste
Cos I know I can't change.
I have always been like this.


I can't  understand your being here 
So tell me, tell me 
When are we burning out 
I can't  understand your being here 
So tell me, tell me
Are we ok for now?


I promise you it's not that easy
Living within this  porcelain head

Cos everything in here smashes so easily,
And by picking up the pieces you'll be left with scars.

It's hard to be 
When your own words chocke you out,
And the silence in your skin lets you down. 

Don't you waste your wide eyed heart upon this clown
Who's mastered the art living upside down.

I can't  understand your being here 
So tell me, tell me 
When are we burning out 
I can't  understand your being here 
So tell me, tell me
Are we ok for now?

//

thanks for listening, i really appreciate you all~

Porcelain Head (are we ok for now?)

A cover of I Do Adore by Mindy Gledhill
Mixed by Flwrs <3

I Do Adore (Cover)

Alan is so fun to work with guys :') This is a cover I sang of one of his songs! It is just super relatable right now lmao. I hope you guys like it! He made the instrumental! He is v cool right? Check him out!

https://soundcloud.com/fishyrecords

Thank you so much for your love! I know i haven't been active but i will put more music on bandcamp soon!!

Alan Mora - The End (Fishy Flip)

hello frends! i hope that you are all well and healthy. i am very congested- but yes please enjoy <3 

Ill try to stop
making you buy veggies
when were at 99
Wasting all of our time

I only sleep under
Grey blankets now
Not pink no more
Sleeping with no door

But I sleep with you
and I know you don’t need to
Sleep with me

But I feel like I need to 
When I don’t really do

I can’t avoid conflict till I die
But how can I go out on my
Own when you can be by my side

Im not trying to make you 
Someone you don’t wanna be
So put that gun down and trust me

Trust me x2

Bubblegum skies remind
Me that we are Running
out of time
How long before I’m blind

Just four more hours 
Before we go to bed
Thats when ill throw up my heart
Cause I don’t wanna be apart

And I sleep with you
And I know you don’t need to 
Sleep with me

But I feel like I need to
When I don’t really do

I can’t avoid conflict till I die But 
how can I go out on my 
Own when you can be by my side

Im not trying to make you depend on me 
but
How can I rest my throat when
You’re just fine without me

Without me x2

bubblegum skies

build me up buttercup (cover)

12.10.20
lyrics:
you never liked the color blue
and yet you wear it, i'm confused
in the past i had to keep up my facades
but knowing you has somehow changed those odds

you never told me this would be easy
but i didn’t come prepared for a fight
asked me if i’d take your hand
i think i just might

no more regretting, we’ve left the past
we’re moving on, leaving the memories at last

here we are in the future no more yesterday
now its time to make the choice: do i leave or do i stay

cause now you like the color blue
and now i wear it, cause it reminds me of you

here we are in the future, no more yesterday
and i think i’ve made the choice, and i choose to stay

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new single made in Quarantine through voice memos and Discord, enjoy!

UTOPIA

outside the family dollar

hope you like it
NOW OUT ON SPOTIFY, ITUNES, APPLE MUSIC
LYRIC VIDEO NOW ON YOUTUBE

https://linktr.ee/elouie

untitled_blue

e11ie