Welcome back to Rap Battle EXE! Today we have the two super soldiers sent to rid the world from some unwanted guests, Master Chief versus Doomguy.

Evan as Master Chief
Dustin as Doomguy

Written by: Evan
Mixed by: Dustin
Beat by: Hollywood Legend Productions
Cover by: Evan

Master Chief:
Cortana told me not to worry, you’re an enemy of no degree
Just the FPS that hasn’t been relevant since 93’
Hell’s no training for my heat, you’re a lost cause, it’s evident
The rules don’t apply to me Flynn, I’m known for cracking Covenants

Doomguy:
Open up your Bible, read the words, and you’ll be singing hits
Blood, Gore, Flesh, Metal, Death, Destruction, Chief I’m bringing yeah it’s
about to get messy, ya better get ready, cause Glory Killin is my speciality
I’m doing my duty, and doing it groovy, assassinating graciously 
You can Bungie right the fuck off, cause I’m the one that made you
just the face of Mountain Dew, it won’t take much to Quake too
My body count changed the game, you’re the Rated M make do
Go and ask Hayden, it’s impossible to break Doom

Master Chief:
The Tumblr super soldier’s gruesome without the execution
You’re Wolfenstein’s bastard child who only ripped Duke Nukem
Spit like jammed clip, well damn bitch, I hurt harder than your BFG
Sorry to strike a nerve, but you pushed Daisies on the beat
The UNSC MC Master Chief, you’ll never be ranked with me 
traded off so many times, but you’ll get fucked worse in my company 
Once this Marine’s up against my flood, he fares better washed out at sea
You see? I’ll be swimming in Nazi blood, left you for dead like Germany

Doomguy:
The bottom of the barrel can taste the bottom of my barrel
Barbie doll’s physique and attitude with G.I. Joe apparel 
You say you’re such tough shit, while I’ve seen deadlier in Chex Quest
So hail to the king, drop deep down on your knees and pray to me... bitch

Master Chief VS. Doomguy - Rap Battle EXE

Lyrics/Karaoke/Trivia: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1iUhXHydECtXt2incabrzBqFIfIi-5GpbRYFyk0hGbBA/edit
Alternate audio: https://soundcloud.com/user-938839005/bendy-vs-cuphead-alternate-audio
MetaMachine as Bendy
Alex as Cuphead
Jade as Ink Demon
Written by MetaMachine, GamingPlush64, Kamren, Dani Frias. Bork and Jade
Mixed by Dustin
Thumbnail by Kamren
Beat by Audio Network
Hint for Meta's next battle: "Smashing Duos"
Hint from Gengo's next battle: "Bare Your Fangs"

Bendy vs. Cuphead

aaaaand we're back!
MetaMachine as Cuphead
Chao as Megaman
Beat produced by: Kustom
Thumbnail by: Trakked
Mixed by: Dustin
Written by: Trakked, Henry, Jason Carreon, B O R K, and Psytube
Chiseled by: Psytube, and Gengo

Battle:
(0:13) Cuphead:
Time to Roll on the mic! Pretty sure you got no Guts, Man
I'll collect his contract and knock him back in the trash can!
Bodying on the beat, with lines more hype than my game
While being within Smash is your only claim to fame
Speaking the same, projectiles won't save ya in this Wallop,
I'll bounce it back at ya, parry ya ‘till you’re the one droppin’
Spitting hot like a Kettle, my rhymes will leave ya Vaporized
‘Bout to leave this failure uglier than his Tekken design

(0:32) Mega Man:
Dropping Bass is my specialty, so prepare for a full blast
You’re a pour man’s Mickey Mouse, yet you think my remake’s half-assed
Like your Boss, I'll be serving you an Automatic loss
Took so many years for your cause, and you really think you’ve got me topped?
Became an unwanted fad yet you say I'm known cause of Smash?
Satan's Slave must be mad, with all of his beta raps!
Won a lot of Game Awards, but you still can't get on top my Level
When you're a greedy delinquent that “Dealt” with the Devil

(0:51) Cuphead:
You’re pretty Wily, but I don’t expect you to see the Light yet
I’m Super Art so; I'll break ya like porcelain! Priceless.
Beat the Devil himself, a yellow blob is what you're stopping
So outdated you should be renamed ”Living Under A Rockman”

(1:01) Mega Man:
Fame came from Fanbase shippings, the Old Kettle made you gay 
So worthless that on your first day out, you gambled your lives away
This battle’s steaming red hot, time to end ya like your story bro
Because your game’s so bad, people can’t even pass the tutorial

(1:10) Cuphead:
Praised by all my towns folks, when I kick your vol-Nuts and bolts
But it’s pretty cruel you Beat on subjects of mind-control
Over time you got subdued, then your fans flew the coop
It’s pretty ironic people admire the bosses over you! (AYY!)

(1:20) Mega Man:
Based off of me, but I wouldn't get near your fans, it's atrocious
So inaccurate with timing, you'd probably call mine “bogus”
A load of Poppy-Peacock I tell ya, your own clout’s in doubt
Made more a Ghost than your game, but you're used to getting Knocked Out!…

Cuphead vs Megaman - Rap Cypher: REBOOT #6

Lyrics/Karaoke/Trivia: https://docs.google.com/document/d/19q8owAtPSf-cUfzuQXFx2SGeSTgUZbTGqS1lri6emBU/edit
MetaMachine as Banjo
Freshy Kanal as Kazooie
Elijah as Popo
Azia as Nana
Written by MetaMachine, Dani Frias, B O R K, Rabi, Jade and Gengo the Cannoli King.
Mixed by Dustin
Thumbnail by AaronGPeters
Beat by Kustom
Hint for Meta's next battle: "Nintendo's Alternate All-Stars"
Hint for Gengo's next battle: "Bare Your Fangs"

Banjo and Kazooie vs. Ice Climbers

Plankton's Experiment : The Monarchy
Squidward's Suicide : Jose

Written by Kamren
Beat : https://drive.google.com/file/d/144fEa5wotGUJpfbpX_hUv3gQJ09Bg1jJ/view?usp=drivesdk
Beat Prod. : Hollywood Legend
Mixed by : Jordan
Cover art by AaronGPeters
Special Thanks to Dustin and Jade!

[0:25]
Squidward's Suicide :
So they revived me just to be put against an episode so shallow?
Since you're just another crappy-pasta that I'll crush beneath my shadow
The voices tell me to do many things, but read your story? Not one of them!
I mean, just look at the Wattpad page! You're just One Course Meal, chum
Musical notes are my formula! The one you should have killed over
Then again, I would have replaced it like Jade when she tossed you over
To the trash can where you belong, don't you realize it yet?
I'm the whole reason for you even being created on the web!

[0:51]
Plankton's Experiment :
Haven't gotten halfway, yet this experiment has already proved pointless 
Since there are better tales of horror coming from suicidal rodents
Had your chance at the Super Bowl, then Sicko Mode got in the way
Now you mope on your bed, screaming "KAREN TOOK MY HAPPINESS AWAY!"
The crowd booed you off the stage, but I didn’t know your plays could get worse
Remind me who ruined Bikini Bottom, cuz it sure wasn’t fucking Squidward!
Here I thought my traps were rich, but your cameo was only for clicks
Then ended transparent as Red Mists, showing off some dead kids.

[1:16]
Squidward's Suicide :
Plankton mad he's getting served? You ain't Hillenburg, so hush
But what can I say? You're already used to being rushed!

[1:23]
Plankton's Experiment :
My story was a masterpiece! Yours is forgotten each and every day
So make yourself useful for once, take that gun and blow out your brains!
Quit the hyper realism, I only need one eye to creep the masses

[1:32]
Squidward's Suicide :
You don't even have a leg to stand on! Something you have less than Patrick
I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE, HAVE FUN WITH THE POLICE!! 

[1:39]
Plankton's Experiment :
Drawing this battle to a close, here lies Squiddy's Hopes and Dreams....

Plankton's Experiment vs Squidward's Suicide - Rap Battle! (ft. Jose & The Monarchy)

-CAST-
Vladimyr P, Dani Frias, Raichous, Alex the Beast, GamingPlush64, Michael / Stark Media and underscores as Zalgo
[REDACTED] as Cthulhu

-WRITERS-
[REDACTED], Michael / Stark Media, and [REDACTED]

-PRODUCTION-
Thumbnail by: Vladimyr P. and Michael / Stark Media
Beat By Dansonn
Mixing by Vladimyr P.

-LYRICS-
ANNOUNCER
Welcome, weary traveler, to Ciphers of the Unknown
Today's matchup is: Zalgo
And
Cthulhu
Commence!

Zalgo  (0:31 - 1:17):
Your cult rooms will be filled with gore as HE COMES to leave his mark
On this hentai monster who’s become nothing but joke fuel for South Park
Looking Sad, Satan? I've been waiting a century for you to spit a good rap
What kind of Dark Lord gets squashed by a sword that shoots out kitty cats?!
Read the text, squidward. my plague starts to spread ‘cross the land
That wipes out this gimmick with relevance more dead than the star that’s in my hand
Please! My candle’s light outshines all that you can spit in this
Kelly’s carnage incarnate’s bars leave squids sleeping with the fishes!
You’re no Necronom-icon! Forgotten when ‘zilla hits the stage!
Telling me you got into politics? (Heh) I’d rather vote for Kanye!
Best go back to startling gamers, for ZALGO is 7 times the rapper
This little munchkin’s been tarnished and now we can start the next chapter..

Cthulhu (1:17 - 2:17):
Zalgo claims to be a god, but he’s barely short of the Funnies
But even when this comic’s stripped down, Zalgo’s just a pitiful plaything for kiddies
So fear the Call of Cthulhu, the true Lovecraftian creation
You’re an outdated fad meme, rejected by the SCP Foundation
This Deviant’s Art is tasteless! Creepypasta crap, nothing new  
You have a song? Do you hold hands and prance around with infants too?
And the ear rape? Glitched font? That’s your method of inflicting pain?
Being eyeless won’t help you, just hearing me will make you go insane!
Your lyrics are unspeakable; but when it comes to stories I’m the pinnacle; invincible
But your chance of winning is like your reality status to your creator: fictional
Like you said I have cult followers, what do you have? Children who think you’re scary?
Just check Behind The Wall and see it’s me who’s taking the victory!
Seven goddamn mouths, you’d think at least one would try to win
It’s quite un-4chan-ate, but I’ll still be leaving this flightless Bird Boxed in
(Yelling) I AM THE EMBODIMENT OF CHAOS, BUT IF HE’S INSISTENT ON PERSISTENCE
I’LL CONTROL HIM, ALTERNATE HIS LIFE, AND DELETE HIM FROM EXISTENCE

Zalgo (2:17 - 2:25):
That’s enough from the kraken, thought I told you to shut it
This is boring me, perhaps you’d rather face off with one of my puppets

Zalgo as Garfield (2:25 - 2:40):
(Yawn) What’s this? Looks like Jon tried making calamari
But I’ll kick him off the track like Odie, and this time, I’m not sorry
Z͜͡͡AL͟͡G҉́Ò '͢͞S͟ ̀͡A͝͡R͠R̷̛IV̢̛E҉͞D̡ ͞A̸̶Ń̢D̴̵ ̀I̡T͏͠' ͠҉͡S̶ ͏U̷N̸͏̢W̷̴̡IS͜É ̀T̷̷͞O̧ ̧̀T͟͏͝H͝͏I͞N҉K͟҉ ͟͞T͘͞HA̛T͜͟ Ý̢OU҉̶ ̵̡̛C̷̨͝AN̡͢ ҉̡̕D͘͞E̶FE҉A̧͜T HI͡M͡
C̷͠͏A̢͜ŲS̡͘È H̀͢E͟ '͜҉̨ĹL̵͘ ̀C̵OR̛̕R̵͘Ù́̀P̷T҉ ̡YǪ͠U̶͘R̴̨͢ ̛́M̷ED͏̷̀I҉̡A͞,̸ ̶̧LE͏A̸͞V̛I̛͞͠N̸Ģ̧̡ ͝Y̶O͠͝U͘R ̢̨͞P͠A̸̡T͢H͝E̡T̨Ì͜C̶̵ ͠B̷ǪOK҉̕S͜͝ ̵͡T̵O̵̢R̀N̡ ̵T̕O ͢͝PI̴E̴͏C̀E̕S̡

Zalgo (2:40 - 2:47):
What a Weird Tale that you’ve woven, saying that you’re superior to me
It’s Something Awful really, but now I’ve finally put an end to your series


Cthulhu (2:47 - 3:03):
Putting on a Puppet show to fight your battles for you? It’s honestly such a Loss
So Dream No More, this is the one and only time that our paths will cross
It’s time I return to my realm and leave this simple post archived, dismissed
They say “Zalgo’s coming”, but even after this I’m still waiting for a good diss... (Malevolently Chuckles)

ANNOUNCER
Who Cracked the Case?
Who Should Cypher Next?
Comment Down Below
And prepare yourselves for the next
Ciphers of The Unknown

Zalgo vs Cthulhu | Ciphers of the Unknown

The WWE Superstar John Cena goes up against the famous actor from Mortal Kombat Johnny Cage in a rap battle for the SMRB Championship

Writing: Fightmarker, AaronGPeters, and Mason
Chiseling: Dani Frias, and Walk
Mixed by Jordan
Flowtest by Rabi 
Beat: by Audio Network
Beat edited by Dani and Fight
Thumbnail by Jason Carreon and Fight
Cast
Announcer: Vlad
Johnny Cage: Alex The Beast
@user-650786333-593076861
John Cena: Seth
@seth-wisniewski-1:

LYRICS
Johnny Cage
So the posterboy for Good Ol Wrasslin wants to fight in this Cage
Well then Let’s Go Cena, try and take center-stage
Looking at your acting credits, and it’s getting pretty sad
Dude, you went from being The Marine to being Fred’s Dad (Ooooo)
Let’s move on, I’m an actual fighter, does this look fake to you!
I take Orton’s babyface far more seriously than you, dude
Scene 1, Cena couldn’t throw one punch in my gut
Scene 2, Cage gives him a punch in the nuts
CM Punked by your fanbase, it really must suck
As much as you pucker up to McMahon for a quick buck
You must stick to the script before you get me to rage
Remember one thing though, Fruity Pebble, You Just Got Caged

John Cena
Go search for relevancy somewhere else, Mr. Dying Brand
I’ll leave you like in the second film, your whole career is in my hands
You can’t see me though, through those undercover cop shades
With your Stryker like physique, you should work for Sonya Blade
1, 2, 3, I won, give your broken legacy to your daughter
Get back backstage before I rearrange your whole posture
Facing me is a bigger problem, I go no holds barred
You’re pretty much screwed when I lower your health bar
You need an Attitude Adjustment, since you think you’re damn hard
Well I’ll go RAW on this dude who can’t even uppercut that far 
I make my raps count while you couldn't step into the arena
Another failed blockbuster got busted by JOHHNNN CENNNAAAA

Johnny Cage
Your Time is Up Cena, you should leave the acting to the pros
Because in this Smackdown, you’re getting more fucked up than your nose!
With all this Playing with Fire, no wonder why rap didn’t want him
like your music career, you’re Batista Bombing and hitting Rock Bottom
Don’t talk about relevancy, when a prank call was your Revival
You don’t have a Legacy, you were handed out every title
Compared to the literal gods I fight with, you got no lethality
You’re just a phony Cena, So I’ll take you out with this verbal BRUTALITY 

John Cena
You should of said “I Quit!’, your stubbornness will lose you this round
Your greatest wins can’t compare to THE 16 TIMES I’VE BEEN CROWNED
I carried the WWE, been the biggest entertainer since The Rock
While you’re video games consistently end up commercial flops!
Oh so you think your hot shit! Left every single record smashed!
But one quick Google search puts you below Crawford, Carson, & Cash
I’m done battling another fan, but there’s one thing i have to dispatch
How ironic that Johnny got his ass whipped in a lyrical cage match

Johnny Cage vs John Cena. Stop Motion Rap Battles

Alex the Beast as Ẓ̴̮̜͖̞̹̫̼̇̊̆͑͝A̸̭͔̠͎̳̓͊͆̊̒̽̏̈́L̶̮͈͓͖̼̉͝G̴̯̅̓̇̆̏͠ͅO̶̢͚̻͇̪͒̈͋̋̽̆͘͜
IcerM as SiivaGunner
Some guy as CBT Man

Written by IcerM
Mixed by IcerM

Beat by Dansonn

Lyrics:

Ẓ̴̮̜͖̞̹̫̼̇̊̆͑͝A̸̭͔̠͎̳̓͊͆̊̒̽̏̈́L̶̮͈͓͖̼̉͝G̴̯̅̓̇̆̏͠ͅO̶̢͚̻͇̪͒̈͋̋̽̆͘͜:
HE COMES! CHAOTIC EVIL EMBODIED AGAINST A SOUND CLOWN
HOPE YOU LOVED LIFE - FOR AS I STRIKE, I’LL TAKE YOURS DOWN
IN A SIMILAR VESSEL, THERE’S NAUGHT THAT I BELIEVE TO SAY
WOULD HAVE A LASTING IMPACT - FOR YOU’RE LIKELY NOT HERE TO STAY
WHEN I TELL WHAT I TELL YOU WILL RUN OFF IN HORROR
SPITTING TICKETS TO HELL WHEN I’M CAUSING DISORDER
I CAN CAUSE YOUR WHOLE SO-CALLED LORE TO BREAK IN A HEARTBEAT
SO LEAVE NOW, LEST I SHOW YOU WHAT’S NOT TO SEE
YOU’RE NOT A LOT TO ME. I’LL HAVE YOU CROSSED
WITHOUT A QUESTION AS TO WHETHER OR NOT THIS IS LOSS
YOU’RE TAKING SIIVA, GUNNER. I’LL PARALYZE THIS BITCH
WHILE YOU FUCK WITH MEMES ON THE WEB I’LL BE TERRORIZING IT

SiivaGunner:
Damn, I knew you’d be pissy, but that’s left me in awe
How about seven chill pills? One for each jaw
There’s so little known about you I’ve found nothing, study as I might
Even Jschlatt can’t hold a candle to that funny mic
I’m the Grand Dad of grab bags with high quality raps, that
If you think you can battle, then listen here, you’re just damn mad
So level with the reality that your puppets are the same
And go walk your fucking staircase back down from whence you came

Ẓ̴̮̜͖̞̹̫̼̇̊̆͑͝A̸̭͔̠͎̳̓͊͆̊̒̽̏̈́L̶̮͈͓͖̼̉͝G̴̯̅̓̇̆̏͠ͅO̶̢͚̻͇̪͒̈͋̋̽̆͘͜:
YOU CAN UTTER ALL THOSE LIES AND CLAIM THEY’RE NOT GETTING OLD
WHEN YOU STOP TREATING MY HIGHER VESSELS AS COMEDY GOLD
YOU’LL NEVER COMPREHEND A METHOD TO WIN, TRY AS YOU MIGHT
RIPS FROM JUST AS MANY GAMES AS TIMES I’VE PLAYED YOU IN THIS FIGHT

SiivaGunner:
Can’t read any of your babble but a couple of shit rhymes
But I’ll mutilate it further - multiple uploads at a time!
HE COMES at the sight of a certain cat, I know you would man
So I’m keen to give you the axe, like you were Wood, Man!
And with those caverns in your skulls, gushing reddened dyes
Just take pages from Cthulhu and go fucking rest your eyes
It’s been many many years, and people are still subscribing
And to put that in perspective, cult activity’s declining

Ẓ̴̮̜͖̞̹̫̼̇̊̆͑͝A̸̭͔̠͎̳̓͊͆̊̒̽̏̈́L̶̮͈͓͖̼̉͝G̴̯̅̓̇̆̏͠ͅO̶̢͚̻͇̪͒̈͋̋̽̆͘͜:
YOU THINK YOU’RE CAUSING DAMAGE WITH YOUR VILE RHYMES? YOU’RE FUCKING WRONG
I’M NOT BEING RIPPED INTO BY THE MINDS BEHIND BIG CHUNGUS’ SONG
WHY AM I EVEN PIT AGAINST A SHITPOST ACCOUNT
WHEN YOU SIMPLY LET YOUR FANBASE DO THE WORK THEN REAP YOUR CLOUT
THEY WOULD ALL BE BETTER OFF ATTEMPTING MUSIC FOR A ROM HACK
I GIVE LIFEBLOOD TO WHAT'S FICTIONAL. YOU MIDI-SLAP THE NUTSHACK
SO NO TURNING BACK. YOU'VE ALREADY MADE YOUR DECISION
SPENDING THE REST OF YOUR DAYS WITHIN COPYRIGHT STRIKE PRISON

SiivaGunner:
Call you chaotic? Please! You wouldn’t last one minute where I fare
I know you love destruction, so how’s this for Your Best Nightmare?
And we all know your sadomasochism’s unprecedented!
If it weren’t for risk of CBT I’d see to it you’re ended
You’ve got a bubble more claustrophobic than meme culture you battle in
ZALGO be like “I’m charged guilty of several Rap Battle Sins”
So this is my Magnum opus, after God knows how long
Insert stupid-ass finisher, something something, ZALGONE!

ZALGO vs SiivaGunner. Rap Battle!

TheAngryMidget as Sweeney Todd
Jake G. as Edward Scissorhands

WELCOME TO A SINISTER RAP BATTLE
SWEENEY TODD
AGAINST
EDWARD SCISSORHANDS
BEGIN

Sweeney Todd:
You may be known to be a drama, but what I spit will be more tragic;
‘Cause this Demon Barber shall leave Frankenstein back in his attic
Better Flee from my Street, take off that scarf, reveal your neck
And One swipe with my blade shall surely leave you home-wrecked
You’re more freakish than Krueger so my crowds will leave you crowded
What? You gonna rob my win like how you failed at robbing houses?
Aww, that’s the girl you like? You gonna finger, knives?
Heh. I bet those cuts burned like your dreary love life

Edward Scissorhands:
My verse will cause you Penny Dread; I wouldn’t try to hurt a soul
But take a seat Freaky, Freddy; I’ll bury you in your own hole
You deserved to be imprisoned, yet you’re thinking you’re a hero?
At least I didn’t kill my love; you’re just the town’s local weirdo
Slash this man with my hands to hear your crowd cheering “bravo!”
You’ll be headless, like your clients, as you lay there, Sleeping Hollow
After hearing that verse, I’d take up your offer to drink
It makes you think, why would this man let his fame go extinct?

Sweeney Todd:
That verse was quite lifeless; as dead as your inventor
I’m the life of the show so don’t think that you’re the center of
Attention! You’re no ascention, I’d leave you hung up in suspension
But you’re just a shitty Wolverine in a cosplay convention!
I’ll take it down a Peg but still put this sculpture on ice
Come forth Ragg, like your face, I get ugly and not nice!
Say my goodbyes to that reply, but I just remembered somethin’
Pardon me, cuz I believe, I left his pie-face in the oven

Edward Scissorhands:
What you spat was mind Bogg-ling, so quit with all your baffling
50 shades of mottling, as I’m spitting throat throttlings
Those bars dragged out like your sentence should, you need a trim?
Cuz you’ll soon be Fade-ing out into the Fogg, you’re looking dim
I’ll gain the Win-stone, turning tables with my own retortion
The Ruffian’s contorting others for his own mental distortion
Holding no Love-tt in your heart, thinking your grim tale is beauty
But it’s best you stay silent, like your very first movie

WHO MURDERED THE MIC?
COMMENT THE WAIVER BELOW
RETURN TO THE DEPP-THS OF HELL
FOR ANOTHER
SINISTER RAP BATTLE

Vladimyr P. as The Crowd

Writers: Vlad and Trakked
Beat Producer: 2Deep
Effects / Mixer: Vlad
Cover Art Made by Vlad

Sweeney Todd vs Edward Scissorhands. Sinister Rap Battles

Lyrics/Flowtest/Message from Gengo: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Pz5X9LPrNsBPVLwBBfMYBhQqNoTZB3XOXoNOfkuxwV0/edit
garbageGothic as Mae Borowski
underscores as Legoshi
Written by Legengo, MetaMachine, Bork and Freshy Kanal
Mixed by Freshy Kanal
Thumbnail by underscores
Beat by Epistra
Hint for next battle: "Women of War" (featuring An Extremely Agitated Hedgehog and HalaCG)

Message from Meta: "As I wait for this to finish uploading I just want to say Happy Birthday to you, Gengo, you're a really good friend and I hope you have a great day today! You're growing up into an amazing person and you've always been there for many of us when we need it, you're funny, a great person to co-run a series with, and most importantly, you're a good friend. No matter what the future holds, we'll be here for you as you've been there for us and you're gonna do amazing things when you get older, enjoy life and eat some cake.

Mae Borowski vs. Legoshi

Derek Savage:
I’ve heard lies saying you tower over me, which I don’t see
So today I’m going to show our differences, I mean, just look at me:
You’re just an author; I’m an actor, director and a cool guy
Make like a child from a ‘no breathing’ class, just keel over and die
Wouldn’t You Like to Know how your creativity’s gone down the spout?
You were a good presenter, but now your career’s unable to Sprout
I Hate Everything about you, and although I don’t like him, I gotta say
If he reviewed your crappy performances, he’d be giving me praise
This bitch could use some Self-Defense, can’t survive my Second Coming
No wonder the BBC kicked you out, all your work’s dull and boring
You’ve a whole book on sins you’ve committed, your flaws are quite large
I mean, you did want an anti-imperialist Marxist to be in charge

Michael Rosen:
Thought he’d sit there like a lemon, but Derek. What does Derek do?
He spits rhymes showing he’s less of a Cool Guy, more of a Fool
Diss the Milk And Sugar King, and you’ll get more than heat
At least I can go without throwing a fit when people make fun of me
Promoting x-rated work on your own website is far from Christian 
And with all of the illegal stuff you’ve done, you’d fit right in with school prison
Could write an entire poem detailing how Horrible you are
But you’d probably Copyright Strike me before I get the chance
Recycled footage, bad editing, portraying fat people as broke schmucks
Topped off with phoned in performances; to put it bluntly, Your Movies Suck!
No longer taken seriously, even the cameraman’s out shadowing you 
I see you’re looking shaky and sorry, gonna cut out this cameo too?

Cool Cat:
You’re really really mean! Seems some kid still thinks bullying is fun
Everyone should stay away from you like you were a deadly gun

Derek Savage:
You rapped once, so what? That doesn’t make you an emcee
Better call you the toothbrush, cause we’ll break you into pieces

Cool Cat:
Bringing Sweeter Revenge than some muddy twig could ever do (haha!)

Derek Savage:
I’m bad with copyright? You almost took down every YouTube Poop of you!

Cool Cat:
While your new books are flopping, me and my Dad will go to Hollywood

Both:
Now it’s time to ‘close up’ this battle so you can make another Sad Book

Michael Rosen:
(Michael’s Verse, Part 2.)
You and this failed mascot must be having a Crazy Dream
I’d argue Solomon would do better than this infringement on Warner Bros’ property
Once you eat this diss like a sandwich, I shall give you to the ducks!
Might as well make another channel called “iMovie Sucks”
Now your son passed away, and I know the pain of losing a child
But using him as an excuse for stupidity? Now that makes me really wild
Like when you impersonated that law firm, your attempts to win have fallen through
So now I don’t suppose you’ll want to battle me again, will you?

[REDACTED] as Derek Savage
@user-938839005 as Cool Cat
King Mewtwo as Michael Rosen
Beat by Kustom
Written by King Mewtwo and Dani Frias
Mixed by Light
Cover Art by Fightmarker

Banjo and Kazooie vs. Ice Climbers

MG Rap Battles

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