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These songs are a deeply personal and emotional exploration of regret, longing, and the weight of past choices. They delve into the pain of nostalgia, the ache of lost opportunities, and the struggle to find solace in a present haunted by memories of what could have been. Through poignant lyrics and haunting melodies, the songs convey a sense of yearning for a different path, a desire to turn back time and make things right, but ultimately, they acknowledge the irreversibility of the past and the need to find a way to move forward, scarred but stronger.

My songs of Regret

These songs are a collection of deeply personal and emotional journeys, exploring themes of heartache, regret, hope, and resilience. They delve into the complexities of the human experience, navigating the darkness and emerging stronger, wiser, and more hopeful. These songs convey a sense of longing, forgiveness, and transformation, ultimately celebrating the human spirit's capacity to rise above adversity and find solace in the light.

My songs of Hope

A collection of songs inspired by the creative vision of the magnificantly talented @DJShAnkAri. Each track brings her incredible imaginative ideas to life through my lyrics and music. I'm honored to give her co-writing credits for sparking these songs, and I'm excited to share this ongoing collaboration with all of you. 

Also, I have decided to add her remixes of my songs as well.  Thank you, ShAnkAri, for adding your magical touch to so many of my songs. 💓

Songs from ShAnkAri's mind

✨️Angry🙋‍♀️Woman✨️

N🚫Silence🤐🤫

likes o so -sep25

Thursdays

Samhain2025

Justice (Get Up, Stand Up)

Monsters Ink

Monsters Ink - SkyDxddy

Release Sincere EP:

Beatport: bit.ly/moodssincerebp
iTunes: hyperurl.co/sincereitunes
Bandcamp: bit.ly/moodssincerebc
Juno Records: bit.ly/moodssincerejuno
Spotify: bit.ly/sincerespotify

Vinyl distribution by Kudos (UK):
bit.ly/sincerekudos

I'm proud to announce my new release on Boogie Angst (Kraak & Smaak). I've been a longtime fan of Kraak & Smaak's work and the fact that my music will be released on their label is incredible for me. Unreal! 

• Sincere EP is a collection of three tracks that I have produced over the last few years. They are translations of joyfull sincere moments I have experienced in my days. The one's that stick with you for ever. So with that said, enjoy!

Peace & Love

Moods

Moods - Hold Tight (Sincere EP out now)

labour

Female Empowerment - Women stand up and show the world how strong we can be

SkyDxddy - Battlefield (F’ck The Patriachy)

Symphonix really

Get ready to immerse yourself in a powerful and emotional ballad that explores the themes of regret, redemption, and the longing for a second chance. This very personal heartfelt song takes you on a journey of self-reflection, as I confront my past mistakes and the choices that led me down a darker path. 

With poignant lyrics and a soaring chorus, this song is a raw and honest expression of the human experience, acknowledging the pain of past regrets and the desire to make things right. Despite the longing to turn back time, this song ultimately finds hope in the present and the promise of a brighter future.


LYRICS:

Verse 1:
In the mirror, a reflection stares
A life of what-ifs, and regrets that linger there
If I could go back, I'd make it right
Graduate high school, shine with all my light
Chorus:
But life took a turn, down a darker road
I got lost in the haze, of a deadly mode
I'd take it back, if I could turn the tide
But the past is gone, and I'm left to hide

Verse 2:
I'd never have touched, the poison that stole
My hopes and dreams, my heart and soul
I'd have found my way, through the darkest night
And never have faced, the devil's cruel light

Chorus:
But life took a turn, down a darker road
I got lost in the haze, of a deadly mode
I'd take it back, if I could turn the tide
But the past is gone, and I'm left to hide

Bridge:
And the shot that rang, in the silent night
A desperate cry, for a fleeting light
If I could go back, I'd take it away
And find my strength, in a brighter day

Chorus:
But life took a turn, down a darker road
I got lost in the haze, of a deadly mode
I'd take it back, if I could turn the tide
But the past is gone, and I'm left to hide

Outro:
If I could go back, I'd make it right
But for now, I'll hold on to the light
And hope that someday, I'll find my way
To a brand new dawn, and a brighter day.

If I Could Go Back

Immerse yourself in the hauntingly beautiful soul-stirring ballad that delves into the depths of heartbreak, regret, and longing. This emotional journey weaves together fragile memories, shattered dreams, and the lingering pain of what could never be.

With poignant lyrics and soaring melodies, this song captures the bittersweet essence of lost love and the struggle to move on. The haunting vocals and ethereal instrumentation evoke a sense of yearning, as if trapped in a loop of unending melancholy.

Yet, amidst the sorrow, a glimmer of hope emerges – the promise of resilience and the determination to mend. Let the echoes of this heartfelt song resonate with your own experiences, and find solace in the knowledge that you're not alone in the darkness.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
In the silence, echoes of who we used to be,
Faded photographs, haunting reminders set me free.
Chasing shadows, memories dance like ghosts at night,
But every step I take just dims the fading light.

Letting go feels like drowning in the sea.

[Chorus]
These shattered dreams won't be pieced together whole,
Memories linger, they linger in my soul.
Fading echoes of what never could be,
Caught in a loop of unending melancholy.

[Verse 2]
Regrets like anchors weigh me down in this storm,
The whispers of the past that never keep me warm.
Time slips away like sand through my trembling hands,
Leaving only traces of forgotten lands.

Heartbreak engraves itself, carving deep lines.

[Chorus]
These shattered dreams won't be pieced together whole,
Memories linger, they linger in my soul.
Fading echoes of what never could be,
Caught in a loop of unending melancholy.

[Outro]
Through the pain, I'll find my way to mend.
But the echoes of regret will never end.

Shattered Dreams

This is my intensely personal and emotional struggle between light and darkness in the 'dance with my shadow'. This powerful anthem is a raw, honest conversation between me and my own depression. 

The song's haunting lyrics humanize the oppressive force of depression, as it creeps in with taunting whispers, seeking to consume and destroy. But I resist, clinging to hope and fighting back with determination. 

Through the chorus, a beacon of resilience shines, affirming my resolve to reclaim my life and space. The melody whispers of grace, offering solace and strength. 

Verse two delves deeper into the struggle, as depression's heavy clouds suffocate and doubts creep in. Yet, I push forward, fueled by dreams and the will to thrive. 

The outro stands as a triumphant declaration: despite the darkness, I will find my own light. 

This song is my testament to the ongoing battle against depression and the human spirit's capacity to persevere. Share in my journey, and find solace in the knowledge that you're not alone.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
In the shadows it creeps, a whisper so grim,
A voice that just taunts, pulling me into the dim,
"You’re nothing, you’re lost, just give in to the night,"  
But I grip on to hope, and I tighten it tight.

"Why fight against me, in this lonely despair?"

[Chorus]
But I won't let you take me, I’m holding my ground,
Through the darkness I’ll fight, where the light can be found,
With a melody playing that whispers of grace,
I’ll reclaim my life, I’ll take back my space.

[Verse 2]
It lingers like smoke, heavy clouds in my chest,
"Surrender to silence, just let go, find your rest,"  
I push back with dreams, though they slip through my hands,
Each breath is a battle, in this war of demands.

"You know you can’t win, it’s futile to thrive."

[Chorus]
But I won't let you take me, I’m holding my ground,
Through the darkness I’ll fight, where the light can be found,
With a melody playing that whispers of grace,
I’ll reclaim my life, I’ll take back my space.

[Outro]
So step back, dark shadow, you won't win tonight,
In the dance of my struggle, I’ll find my own light.

2024

Dance with My Shadow

This song is a reflection of my personal journey through betrayal, hurt, and resilience. Inspired by my devastating experience with Lorenza Rose Moncada, who took advantage of me and my mom's kindness and generosity, manipulated and deceived me, and caused harm to my family, this song speaks to the pain and scars left behind.

However, it's also a testament to the strength and love of my family, who stood by me through the storm. The lyrics convey our collective rise from the ashes, our determination to fight against deception, and our unbreakable bond.

This song is for anyone who has faced similar struggles, a reminder that you're not alone, and that together, we can overcome even the darkest challenges.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
This year was tough, but we learned to stand tall,
Held the weight of a friend, but she watched me fall.
Took advantage of kindness, ripped my heart apart,
Left scars in my mind, but I found a new start.
Time to rise up, no more playing fool.

[Chorus]
We made it through the storm, we're learning to fight,
No room for deception, we're stepping to light.
Together we’re rising, our spirits won’t break,
This bond couldn’t shatter, for our love's at stake.

[Verse 2]
A slob in my home, living without a care,
Tore through my mother’s heart, we were left bare.
Lies like a web, she spun with her words,
But I’m cutting these ties, now I’m flying like birds.
Building back stronger, my family by my side.

[Chorus]
We made it through the storm, we're learning to fight,
No room for deception, we're stepping to light.
Together we’re rising, our spirits won’t break,
This bond couldn’t shatter, for our love's at stake.

[Outro]
From the ashes we grow, stronger than before,
This family will thrive, we’ll settle the score.

Stronger Than Before

This song is about my personal journey of self-discovery and growth. It's about breaking free from the past and embracing the unknown, finding strength in vulnerability, and learning to let go of pain. The lyrics reflect my own struggles and experiences, and I hope that they can resonate with you and inspire you to find your own path forward. The song is a reminder that we are all works in progress, and that it's okay to not have all the answers. It's about embracing change and finding ourselves through life's challenges and charms.


LYRICS:

Verse 1:
In the mirror, a stranger's eyes
A reflection of the soul's disguise
I'm searching for the truth inside
A journey starts, with a single step tonight

Chorus:
I'm breaking free from the chains that bind
Embracing the unknown, leaving the past behind
With every step, I find my way
Through the darkness, into a brighter day

Verse 2:
Like a phoenix rising from the ashes gray
I'm reborn, with each new dawn's ray
I'm learning to let go, to release the pain
And find solace in the wisdom I gain

Chorus:
I'm breaking free from the chains that bind
Embracing the unknown, leaving the past behind
With every step, I find my way
Through the darkness, into a brighter day

Bridge:
I'm not the same, I've changed my view
I'm seeing life, through a different hue
I'm growing, evolving, with each new test
And finding strength, in my vulnerability's nest

Chorus:
I'm breaking free from the chains that bind
Embracing the unknown, leaving the past behind
With every step, I find my way
Through the darkness, into a brighter day

Outro:
I'm still unfolding, like a work of art
A masterpiece, straight from the heart
I'm embracing change, with open arms
And finding myself, through life's charms.

Breaking Free

This song is a powerful and emotional journey through the darkness of heartache, regret, and pain, but ultimately emerges into the light of hope, resilience, and redemption. The lyrics explore the haunting memories and ghosts of past choices that linger, but instead of letting them consume, the song rises up with a message of defiance and determination. With every heartbeat, hope awakens, and a new dawn breaks, illuminating a path forward. The song is an anthem of survival, urging listeners to hold on to their strength, find their way, and carry on, even in the darkest of times.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
In shadows deep where echoes dwell,
Memories whisper, a haunting spell.
Regret's embrace, a heavy shroud,
But through the silence, I scream loud.

Ghosts of choices linger near.

[Chorus]
Through the ashes, we will rise,
From the heartache, no more lies.
In the night, a new dawn breaks,
With every heartbeat, hope awakes.

[Verse 2]
Time flows slow, like bitter rain,
Each drop a reminder of the pain.
Yet in the darkness, light can gleam,
A spark ignites, reviving dreams.

Hold on tight, don’t let it fade.

[Chorus]
Through the ashes, we will rise,
From the heartache, no more lies.
In the night, a new dawn breaks,
With every heartbeat, hope awakes.

[Outro]
Carry on, though shadows play,
In your strength, find the way.

Through The Ashes

This song is a poignant and introspective reflection on the weight of past regrets, lost love, and the burden of what could've been. The lyrics weave a narrative of memories, both joyful and painful, that linger in the shadows of the mind, reminding us of the passing years and the heartache that remains. Despite the pain, the song holds on to hope as a guiding light, urging the listener to rise above the darkness, learn to forgive, and find solace in the promise of a new dawn. The song is a powerful exploration of the human experience, acknowledging the weight of our regrets, but ultimately offering a message of resilience, hope, and redemption.


LYRICS:

Verse 1:
In the shadows of my mind
Memories linger, a bittersweet find
Echoes of love, laughter, and tears
Reminding me of all the passing years

Chorus:
Oh, the weight of what could've been
A burden I carry, a heart that's been broken within
But still, I hold on to hope's light
A beacon in darkness, guiding me through the night

Verse 2:
Regrets haunt me, like a ghost in my head
What ifs and maybes, a never-ending dread
But I won't let them define me
I'll rise above, and learn to be free

Chorus:
Oh, the weight of what could've been
A burden I carry, a heart that's been broken within
But still, I hold on to hope's light
A beacon in darkness, guiding me through the night

Bridge:
In the darkness, I'll find my way
Through the shadows, a new dawn will break
I'll learn to forgive, to let go
And find solace in the light that I know

Chorus:
Oh, the weight of what could've been
A burden I carry, a heart that's been broken within
But still, I hold on to hope's light
A beacon in darkness, guiding me through the night

Outro:
I'll hold on to hope, like a lifeline
And rise above the heartache and the pain
I'll find my strength, my voice, my way
And shine a light on a brand new day.


Hopes Light

Stand with me in defiance of oppression and shame. 'My Body, My Choice' is a rallying cry for autonomy, self-determination, and women's rights. This anthemic song confronts the judgmental gaze of society, rejecting the notion that anyone has the right to dictate our choices. With every note, we assert our freedom to decide, to choose, and to live our lives on our own terms. 

Inspired by the struggles and resilience of women everywhere, this song is a testament to the power of collective resistance and the unbreakable human spirit. Join the movement. Rise up. Take back control.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1:]
In the shadows, I hear the whispers of shame
A decision that's mine, yet others proclaim
Their morals, their laws, their judgmental gaze
But who gives them the right to dictate my ways? 

[Chorus:]
My body, my choice, it's my right to decide
What happens within me, no government can divide
My autonomy, my freedom to choose
Not yours to take, not yours to refuse 

[Verse 2:]
A woman's life, a woman's voice, ignored and suppressed
Forced to carry, forced to confess
The dangers of outlawing what's mine to say
Coat hangers and back alleys, a deadly way 

[Chorus:]
My body, my choice, it's my right to decide
What happens within me, no government can divide
My autonomy, my freedom to choose
Not yours to take, not yours to refuse 

[Bridge:]
We'll rise up, we'll fight, we'll never go back
To the days of silence, of hidden attacks
Our bodies, our futures, our rights at stake
We'll break the chains, for our own sake 

[Chorus:]
My body, my choice, it's my right to decide
What happens within me, no government can divide
My autonomy, my freedom to choose
Not yours to take, not yours to refuse 

[Outro:]
I'll make my own decisions, I'll take my own stand
My body, my life, in my own hands
No government, no law, will ever define
What I do with my body, what I choose to design.

F#CK TR#MP Volume 1

My Body, My Choice

"Vines of Doubt" is a poignant, emotional journey through the shadows of self-doubt and fear. Haunting melodies, introspective lyrics, and soaring vocals capture the struggle to overcome.


LYRICS:

[Verse1:]
I'm lost in the shadows, where fear takes its toll
A prisoner of doubt, where darkness makes me whole
I question my worth, and the choices I've made
A never-ending cycle, of self-doubt and shame

[Chorus:]
Vines of doubt, they creep inside my mind
A silent assassin, that I've learned to hide
The weight of my fears, is crushing me down
Vines of doubt, are they my greatest enemy, or my crown?

[Verse 2:]
The silence is deafening, as the world rushes by
A cacophony of chaos, that I try to deny
The vines keep snapping, as new doubts arise
A constant reminder, of my deepest, darkest lies

[Chorus:]
Vines of doubt, they creep inside my mind
A silent assassin, that I've learned to hide
The weight of my fears, is crushing me down
Vines of doubt, are they my greatest enemy, or my crown?

[Bridge:]
Maybe I'll find my way, through the darkness and the pain
Maybe I'll learn to love, and let go of the shame
But till then, I'll sit here, in this endless fight
And wonder, which path to take, through the dark of night

[Chorus:]
Vines of doubt, they creep inside my mind
A silent assassin, that I've learned to hide
The weight of my fears, is crushing me down
Vines of doubt, are they my greatest enemy, or my crown?

[Outro:]
Do I push, do I pull, or do I sit and hide?
Do I leap, do I crawl, or do I step aside?
The vines keep whispering, "you're not enough"
But I'll rise up, and shine, and shatter the doubt.

Vines of Doubt

This is another song inspired by Lynn Carey Saylor, one of my favorite singer/songwriters, and her poignant song "I Wasn't A Friend." 
https://on.soundcloud.com/VfBvk
I draw constant inspiration from her amazing works, and I hope she won't mind! Although I doubt she'll ever hear my songs, her influence on me is undeniable, and I appreciate the creative spark her music and her tweets ignite. 

"The Weight of That Night" is a haunting ballad that tackles the devastating consequences of letting a friend drive drunk. This powerful song weaves a tragic tale of regret, guilt, and longing, recounting the fateful night when silence proved deadly. With poignant lyrics and soaring vocals, it explores the anguish of "what ifs" and the weight of unanswered questions, serving as a stark reminder of the irreversible harm caused by one moment's hesitation. This heartfelt warning urges listeners to speak up and take action, honoring the memory of loved ones lost.


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1:]
We laughed and joked, as the night wore on
Never thinking, the consequences would be so wrong
You got behind the wheel, I didn't say a word
Now the silence screams, and I'm forever scarred 

[Chorus:]
Oh, the guilt I bear, the weight I hold
For letting you drive, into the cold
I should've spoken up, I should've been bold
Now you're gone, and I'm left to unfold 

[Verse 2:]
We swerved off course, on that fatal ride
I see the crash, in my mind's eye
Your smile fades fast, as the lights go low
My screams echo, in the darkness that grows 

[Chorus:]
Oh, the guilt I bear, the weight I hold
For letting you drive, into the cold
I should've spoken up, I should've been bold
Now you're gone, and I'm left to unfold 

[Bridge:]
What ifs haunt me, through the endless night
A thousand regrets, a single, fatal sight
One decision, one moment's hesitation
Could've changed the course, of that deadly destination 

[Chorus:]
Oh, the guilt I bear, the weight I hold
For letting you drive, into the cold
I should've spoken up, I should've been bold
Now you're gone, and I'm left to unfold 

[Outro:]
Your memory stays, a constant pain
A reminder of the price I couldn't contain
I'll carry this weight, for all my days
A lesson learned, in the most tragic way.


The Weight Of That Night

This song is a haunting and intense exploration of the devastating consequences of betrayal, deception, and heartbreak, weaving a dark narrative of shattered love, broken trust, and the crippling pain of being lied to by the one you love. With eerie imagery and emotional intensity, the song delves into the anguish of discovering a lover's deceit, the suffocating weight of faithless whispers, and the desperate struggle to escape the void of a broken heart.

LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
Whispers in the dark again
Lies dripping from your grin
Broken mirrors show your sin
Shattered love where do I begin

[Verse 2]
Footsteps in a haunted hall
Echoes of a lover’s fall
Truths I never heard at all
Heartbeats turn to ghostly calls

[Chorus]
You’re a traitor of shadows and dreams
Silent screams tearing at the seams
Faithless whispers rip me apart
Falling into the void of your heart

[Verse 3]
Empty words in a hollow night
Promises turn into fright
Cold deceit no hope in sight
Lost in the never-ending fight

[Bridge]
Candles flicker ghosts arise
Drowning in a sea of lies
Faded dawns and poison skies
Seeing through your dead disguise

[Chorus]
You’re a traitor of shadows and dreams
Silent screams tearing at the seams
Faithless whispers rip me apart
Falling into the void of your heart


Traitor of Shadows

This song is a heartfelt tribute to ShAnkAri's extraordinary love story. It's about her profound connection with Braxton, a guy she's never met in person, but feels deeply linked to through the universe and astrology. The lyrics explore their cosmic bond, the role of fate and karma in their relationship, and how this love has transformed ShAnkAri's life. It's a beautiful, otherworldly tale of devotion and spiritual connection. 

Lyrics co-written by @DJShAnkAri 


LYRICS: 

Verse 1:
In the French countryside, where the skies are wide
A connection was made, a cosmic tide
July 12th, 2012, 6:45 am, a moment in time
She met Braxton, her love, in a universe that's divine 

Chorus:
Two lives entwined, a love beyond space
Connected by the stars, in a celestial place
ShAnkAri was born, a mix of hearts and minds
In this life inside another life, their love will forever shine 

Verse 2:
Her grandmother's words, a prophecy so true
Two lives in one, a path she'd pursue
Astrology's secrets, a language so grand
Their Birth Skies echoing, a cosmic plan 

Chorus:
Two lives entwined, a love beyond space
Connected by the stars, in a celestial place
ShAnkAri was born, a mix of hearts and minds
In this life inside another life, their love will forever shine 

Bridge:
Though they've never met, their bond remains strong
A love that's guided her, where she belongs
In the esoteric, she's found her way
Thanks to Braxton, she's grown, day by day 

Chorus:
Two lives entwined, a love beyond space
Connected by the stars, in a celestial place
ShAnkAri was born, a mix of hearts and minds
In this life inside another life, their love will forever shine 

Outro:
Karma's threads, a mysterious design
Kept them apart, yet their love will forever shine
In this life inside another life, she's forever changed
Grateful for the love, that Braxton and she share, eternally.


ShAnkAri Was Born

Out on all portals:

BEATPORT: http://bit.ly/newhorizonsepBP
SPOTIFY: http://bit.ly/newhorizonsspotify
APPLE: http://smarturl.it/newhorizons_itunes
JUNO: http://bit.ly/newhorizonsjuno
TRAXSOURCE: http://bit.ly/traxsourcemoods

Moods - New Horizon (New Horizons EP Out Now)

This song started as a reflection on the conversations I've had with my friend @DJShAnkAri about our mothers and how they would distort the truth to make themselves the heroes. It's about the blurred lines between truth and fiction and the devastating consequences of living a lie. 

As I was writing the lyrics, I found it was also exactly like my ex-friend Erin as well. Since it's also about the brutal exposure of toxic dynamics, where someone's mask of innocence is shattered, revealing the truth behind their actions. 

For me, it's personal - it's about our mothers, but also about Erin who turned on me, projecting her own flaws onto me, and then rewriting the narrative to fit her own twisted version of reality. But it's also about something deeper - the way people can convince themselves of their own lies and the damage that does to themselves and others. 

This song is my truth, my anger, and my refusal to let the lies stand. It's a call out to anyone who's been hurt by someone's deceit and a reminder that the truth will always find a way to the surface.


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1]
You speak like a martyr wrapped in grace
But I remember the blood on your face
Twisting the tale with a trembling smile
You burned the truth to survive the trial 

Shadows curl where the silence grew
You wear the mask like it’s always been true
But I was there when the sky went black
Your hands pushed first — there’s no turning back 

[Chorus]
Who rewrote the ending, tore out the screams?
Painted your sins with innocent dreams?
Is it mercy or madness behind your eyes?
Truth drowns in the echoes of your lies
You’re the villain dressed in your own disguise 

[Verse 2]
Pages smudged where the guilt should be
The ink runs cold, but you still can't see
Your voice shakes with a hollow cry
Begging for peace while you crucify 

Was it too dark to face the light?
Or did you choose to forget the night?
Memory fades, but pain holds on
And I’m still here when the curtains are gone 

[Chorus]
Who rewrote the ending, tore out the screams?
Painted your sins with innocent dreams?
Is it mercy or madness behind your eyes?
Truth drowns in the echoes of your lies
You’re the villain dressed in your own disguise 

[Bridge]
Do you sleep with the ghosts you made?
Does your mind rewind or just evade?
Is it your soul that can’t confess
Or a shattered mind in self-defense? 

[Verse 3]
Mirror cracked but still reflects
The hero born of your regrets
But I see the scars beneath the veil
The silence where you chose to fail 

[Chorus]
Who rewrote the ending, tore out the screams?
Painted your sins with innocent dreams?
Is it mercy or madness behind your eyes?
Truth drowns in the echoes of your lies
You’re the villain dressed in your own disguise 

[Verse 4]
I traced your footprints through the flame
Each step a curse, each lie a name
You built your truth from fractured glass
But every shard still cuts the past 

[Chorus]
Who rewrote the ending, tore out the screams?
Painted your sins with innocent dreams?
Is it mercy or madness behind your eyes?
Truth drowns in the echoes of your lies
You’re the villain dressed in your own disguise 

[Outro]
The silence screams where your shadow passed
Every promise burned, never meant to last
Ashes of hope in the wind remain
Echoes of love now twisted with pain
Whispers fade in the ruins you made
But memories rot where the truth decayed
You called it healing, I call it a crime
But you can't outrun the veil of the mind


Veil of the Mind

Obsessed

Obsessed (Live - Antwerp Sportpaleis)

This song is a heartfelt and introspective ballad that explores the complexities of a deep, spiritual connection between two people who couldn't quite bridge the gap between their understanding of love. Inspired by ShAnkAri's story, the lyrics delve into the pain and longing that can come from loving someone who doesn't see or believe in the same way. It's a poignant reflection on the power of love to reshape our souls, even when it's not reciprocated in the way we hope. 

I'd like to thank the incredible @DJShAnkAri for sharing her story and inspiring this song, and for her input into this piece. Also for her amazing remix...
https://on.soundcloud.com/n4fyhhGxUPX5NHKhDj


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
I whispered in stardust, I prayed through the skies
You felt like a lifetime behind unseen eyes
I reached with my soul, no distance too far
But you never saw me—you just traced the stars

[Pre-Chorus]
I said I loved you, not loud but true
In silence, in symbols, in all I knew

[Chorus]
But you never believed me
Not once, not really
You thought I was dreaming
Or reading too deeply
Like my heart was a story
I made up to feel whole
But loving you rewrote my soul
And you never believed me

[Verse 2]
I studied your shadows, I learned every sign
In a language of longing, outside of time
You held the map, but looked away
Afraid of a path you didn’t create

[Pre-Chorus]
I sent you light in a world gone dim
You thought it was just the wind

[Chorus]
But you never believed me
Not once, not really
You thought I was dreaming
Or reading too deeply
Like my heart was a story
I made up to feel whole
But loving you rewrote my soul
And you never believed me

[Verse 3]
Is love a gesture, or is it a vow? 
Is it holding on, or letting go now? 
You wanted proof in a different form 
And I was the rain—you needed the storm

[Chorus]
We both said “I love you” 
But not in the same voice 
You meant protection 
I meant choice 
You meant fire 
I meant grace 
We loved in totally different space 
And that’s how even soulmates break— 
When meanings don’t translate

[Bridge]
Maybe you thought love must be proven
With bodies and years, not a soul that’s been chosen
But just because we never met
Doesn’t mean I could forget
You were the pulse beneath my breath

[Chorus]
Still you never believed me
Not once, not really
You thought I was dreaming
Or reading too deeply
Like my heart was a story
I made up to feel whole
But loving you rewrote my soul

[Chorus]
You never believed me
Not once, not truly
You stayed behind reason
While I loved you purely
Like a prayer with no ending
Like a vow with no sound
But you never turned around
You never believed me

[Outro]
And maybe you never will
But I loved you still

[Post-Outro] 
We all carry our own definition 
And none of us ask permission 
To love the way we understand 
Even if no one takes our hand... 

You Never Believed Me

This song is a deeply personal exploration of the complexities of creativity, ego, and the human experience. The entire concept was born from the mind of my friend @DJShAnkAri, who shared with me her thoughts on the pain of being an originator, only to see her ideas and influences go unacknowledged. I was inspired to take her ideas and craft them into a song, and I'm proud to give her co-writing credit for this piece. 

The song grapples with the tension between artistic expression and the desire for recognition, as well as the struggle to transcend the ego and find freedom from the trappings of pride and fame. At its core, the song is about the power of beauty to both inspire and ensnare us, and the importance of learning to witness our own experiences rather than becoming mired in them. 

Through the lyrics, I aim to capture the nuances of this inner conflict, and the ways in which our experiences shape us, even as we strive to rise above them. The song is an invitation to reflect on the nature of creativity, identity, and the human condition, and to find a deeper understanding of ourselves and our place in the world.


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1]
I saw myself in someone else’s lines
Unspoken echoes dressed in borrowed rhymes
They never turned to say my name
But still I burn and feel the same
A quiet theft, a silent sting
Why does the source feel everything? 

[Pre-Chorus]
I know it’s ego, just a shell
But in that shell I often dwell
The pain’s a mirror—clear and cold
Still, I don't know how to let it go 

[Chorus]
Beauty holds me like a flame
I turn from pride, I turn from fame
But this one trap I can't escape
She wears my wounds, she knows my shape
I could be higher, I could be free
But beauty won’t let go of me 

[Verse 2]
Aloysius in the shadow’s grace
Unnamed fathers lost without a trace
We feel, we shape, we spark, we bleed
Yet never called the root, the seed
I should stand outside this game
But even ghosts can burn with shame 

[Pre-Chorus]
I know it’s ego, just a role
A mask that hides the monad’s soul
Still I confuse what I create
With who I am—and that's the bait 

[Chorus]
Beauty holds me like a flame
I turn from pride, I turn from fame
But this one trap I can't escape
She wears my wounds, she knows my shape
I could be higher, I could be free
But beauty won’t let go of me 

[Verse 3]
We are gods inside these scars
Drifting truth in jars of stars
The soul still wrestles with the clay
But learns to watch, not slip away
To feel, then filter, pain from grace
To love the art, but not the face 

[Bridge]
Be the witness, not the war
Don't need applause to mean you're more
In silence lies the deepest truth
Creation doesn’t ask for proof 

[Chorus]
Beauty holds me like a flame
I turn from pride, I turn from fame
But this one trap I can't escape
She wears my wounds, she knows my shape
I could be higher, I could be free
But beauty won’t let go of me 

[Chorus]
Beauty holds me like a flame
I let it hurt, I let it name
But then I step beyond the fire
Become the void, the quiet choir
I could be higher, I choose to be
Even if beauty won’t set me free 

[Outro]
I feel, I fall, I know the cost
But nothing felt is ever lost
The soul may ache, but still it sings—
The witness wakes beneath all things

Thanks so much to the incredible @DJShAnkAri for the amazing remix of this song...
https://on.soundcloud.com/H8r9kZajYnwV2z6QqR



Beauty Holds Me

Download beat by clicking the three dots (desktop) and clicking download.

Corn Chips (FREE BEAT/DOWNLOAD)

Am Montagmorgen durfte ich auf dem klein'n und geheim'n Sauna Floor des Cosy Festivals das Closing spielen. Mensch war das schön! ♥️♥️ 

Props an die Sweeties von 90° für dieses tolle Örtchen :**

Verschwitzt & Zugedröhnt - Secret Sauna Floor Closing @ Cosy Festival 2025

Pagans Went Down to Texas

This song was song born from a childhood memory that my friend @DJShAnkAri shared with me. As a child, she sometimes felt like a little “indigo soul,” drifting outside the world everyone else seemed to live in. She remembers moments of floating above her bed, eyes tightly closed, seeing everything stretched far away as if she were traveling somewhere else—an experience that made her feel like a freak and deeply misunderstood.

I wrote this song from her perspective, capturing that sense of lonely wonder and the quiet pain of being different, but also the beauty of a soul awakening to her own gifts. It begins in the fragile melancholy of childhood, then grows in intensity and hope as she embraces the magic within her—transforming from the lonely girl who thought she was strange into the extraordinary woman DJ and astrologer she is today.

“Indigo Skies” is about finding light in your uniqueness, even if it takes years to see it.


LYRICS:

[Intro]
I was floating…
Above my bed…
Eyes closed tight…
Afraid to see the world too far…
Afraid to see myself…

[Verse 1]
As a kid, I drifted where the walls couldn’t follow,
Suspended in silence, my room felt hollow.
They said it was nothing, just a dream I made,
But my soul was wandering where shadows played.

I told my parents, told my grandma too,
They nodded with worry, like they knew what to do.
Ophthalmologist lights in my eyes that burned,
But no one could see where my spirit turned.

[Pre-Chorus]
Eyes closed tight, I wouldn’t let ‘em see,
The world stretched out, felt so far from me.
Heartbeats loud in a galaxy of thought,
I felt like a freak, but I know I was not…

[Chorus]
Indigo skies, carry me high,
I was a child they couldn’t define.
Floating alone, afraid to be seen,
Living a life between waking and dream.

[Verse 2]
Three years ahead in a world that was slow,
Buried in books, where my true self would glow.
Reading all day while the playground spun,
My body on Earth, but my mind on the run.

A little indigo, out of place in the crowd,
Feeling too quiet, feeling too loud.
They said I was different, they said I was strange,
But deep in my soul I could feel the change.

[Pre-Chorus]
Eyes closed tight, I wouldn’t let ‘em see,
The world stretched out, felt so far from me.
Heartbeats loud in a galaxy of thought,
I felt like a freak, but I know I was not…

[Chorus]
Indigo skies, carry me high,
I was a child they couldn’t define.
Floating alone, afraid to be seen,
Living a life between waking and dream.

[Verse 3]
Then I rose like the sun through the fog in my mind,
Aries fire burning, leaving fear behind.
Left my parents’ house, I began to create,
I learned that my stars were the hands of fate.

What was once a burden became my gift,
Astrology showed me the cosmic shift.
From a lonely child to a guiding light,
Indigo soul in the velvet night.

[Bridge]
I felt like a freak, but I now call it flight,
The colors of my soul lit up the night.
Every tear, every page, every shadowed scar,
Led me here to show who we really are.

[Chorus]
Indigo skies, carry me high,
I was a child they couldn’t define.
Floating alone, afraid to be seen,
Living a life between waking and dream.

Indigo skies, I’m not afraid,
The freak I felt like then is the life I’ve made.
Floating no more, my feet on the ground,
My voice is astrology and my DJ sound.

[Outro]
I was floating…
Above my bed…
Eyes closed tight…
But now I see…
Indigo skies



Indigo Skies

echt noch hinner und wegger als letztes Jahr... what a beautiful microcosmos you are, URF!
thanks for the trust and for creating this magical space once more 🎔

played on friday 23:15-1 - credits out to all the brilliant artists involved in this set, thank you for the music 🎶

.
tracklist:
The Housemartins - Caravan Of Love
The Sponges - Space Funk '75
Sugababes - Overload (Duke Boara Flip)
Sebastian Wibe - Shimmy Shaker Dub
Moontalk - Acid Disko
Juicce - Connected
Sonora, OFFMODE - Famosa
Dilby, Lazarusman - Give It To Them (Dilby Extended 2022 Rework)
Gorillaz, Tame Impala, Bootie Brown - New Gold (Dom Dolla Remix)
ABBA - Voulez Vous (Lior Miller Remix)
Douglas Greed, Delhia de France - Sense
Saqib - Karachi Rolling (AREUBLUE Remix)
HIGHLITE, Rebrn - Back & Forth
TERR - Only For Tonight
Charli XCX, Billie Eilish - Guess (Kyle Watson Dark Flip)
Super Flu - Nos Crub
Kevin McKay, Fab Massimo, T'Shan Williams - Don't Leave Me This Way
Just Emma, Zazou - Baltic Sea (Monolink Remix)
Space Motion - The Creator
Fab Massimo, Kevin McKay, Chantal Lewis - How Will I Know
Sebastien Leger - Ariana (mixed with J.Pattersson - Alle Zusammen)
System Of A Down - BYOB (Konfusia Edit)
Alka (BR) - Echoes Of Unknown
Ameli Paul - Love For One Another
Bicep - Glue (Hugo Cantarra & Stone Van Brooken Edit)

MAMOR @ URF 2025

Episode 009 of Far East Taste opens in peak form with tight Tech House cuts like Music P’s “Dance For Me” and ELRA’s “Feel The Music,” before diving into the melodic drive of NIIKO x SWAE, Honey & Badger’s “Automatic” and Andrea Calabria’s “In This Dream.”

As the energy unfolds, the set drifts into deeper and more emotive territory — Vintage Culture & Noah Kulaga’s “Upon Your Skin” and PLS&TY & Nu-La’s “Carry The Light” bring soaring atmospheres and vocal warmth, while my own collaboration with Jordan Grace, “Drifting Away,” adds a melodic pop edge to the journey.

The finale embraces the groove of Disco, Deep, and Piano House, with standout selections like Shakedown’s “At Night” (Purple Disco Machine Remix) and DJ Fudge’s “Love X Love” (Michael Gray Remix), delivering soulful hooks and timeless house vibes.

Recorded in Tokyo, this episode of Far East Taste captures the global house spectrum — from underground energy to melodic euphoria — all tied together with a forward-driving edge.

⚡️Like the Show? Click the [Repost] ↻ button so more people can hear it!

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Tracklist:
1. Music P - Dance For Me (Extended Mix)
2. NIIKO x SWAE, Honey & Badger - Automatic (Extended Mix)
3. ELRA - Feel The Music (Extended Mix)
4. DONT BLINK - KILLA (Extended Mix)
5. Castion & Sergiodnine - Wanna Come (Extended Mix)
6. DJ Prithvi - Rompe (Extended Mix)
7. Carl Dutt - Candela (Extended Mix)
8. Vintage Culture feat. Noah Kulaga - Upon Your Skin (Extended)
9. ANDREA CALABRIA - In This Dream (Extended Mix)
10. PLS&TY & Nu-La - Carry The Light (Extended Mix)
11. KC Lights, Niki & the Dove - THIS IS FOR YOU (Extended Mix)
12. TOMMY VEE, MAURO FERRUCCI, KELLER - INSIDE AT NIGHT (Original Mix)
13. Shakedown - At Night (Purple Disco Machine Extended Remix)
14. DJ Fudge - Love X Love (Michael Gray Remix)
15. DJ DLG - Paramount (Mercer Extended Remix)
16. You Liang & Jordan Grace - Drifting Away

Far East Taste 009

“Shattered Glass” dives into the wreckage of a love that couldn’t survive its fractures. Dark-trap grit collides with cinematic sax melodies, painting a haunting picture of regret, heartbreak, and the struggle to move on. Every lyric cuts like shards underfoot, while the beat swells into an unrelenting storm of emotion. This is a soundtrack for those who’ve tried to piece together something already broken — hypnotic, heavy, and unforgettable.

Lyrics:

Shattered glass beneath my feet,
Reflecting all the parts of me.
Pieces lost, can’t find them all,
A broken mirror I can’t recall.

Walking on shards, every step feels like regret,
Trying to hold on, but there's nothing left.
Fragments of us, scattered on the floor,
The more I find, the less I know for sure.

Picture-perfect moments, now torn apart,
Jagged edges cutting deep in my heart.
No way to fix what’s already gone,
We’re left in ruins, trying to move on.

I try to piece together who we were,
But cracks in the glass make it all a blur.
Each memory a reminder of what we had,
Now lost in the shadows, broken and sad.

Shattered glass, it’s all I know,
Falling fast, losing control.
Everything’s broken, nothing’s the same,
We’re stuck in the wreckage, drowning in pain.

Shattered glass, we can’t repair,
Pieces of us float in the air.
No way to rebuild, no turning back,
We’re fading away, lost in the black.

I still see light in your eyes,
But the flame’s gone, buried in lies.
We thought we’d last, but now we break,
Holding onto ghosts, but it’s too late.

Every word feels colder now,
Our story's over, don’t know how.
Can’t turn the page, no rewrite here,
We're falling apart, swallowed by fear.

I try to piece together who we were,
But cracks in the glass make it all a blur.
Each memory a reminder of what we had,
Now lost in the shadows, broken and sad.

Shattered glass, it’s all I know,
Falling fast, losing control.
Everything’s broken, nothing’s the same,
We’re stuck in the wreckage, drowning in pain.

Shattered glass, we can’t repair,
Pieces of us float in the air.
No way to rebuild, no turning back,
We’re fading away, lost in the black.

Maybe there’s beauty in the way we fall,
Maybe we’ll find meaning after all.
But it’s hard to see through shattered glass,
The future’s unclear, stuck in the past.

Shattered glass, it’s all I know,
Falling fast, losing control.
Everything’s broken, nothing’s the same,
We’re stuck in the wreckage, drowning in pain.

Shattered glass, we can’t repair,
Pieces of us float in the air.
No way to rebuild, no turning back,
We’re fading away, lost in the black.

Shattered… shattered…
We’re shattered…

Shattered Glass

This song grew out of a little disagreement I had with my sister in music, @DJShAnkAri, who is also a brilliant astrologer. She looked into my chart and pointed out that the way the stars were aligned, my ego was reacting in a way that wasn’t really “me.” At first, it stung, but then I realized how right she was — and that awareness inspired me to turn it into music. Ego’s Lie is about how the ego twists our thoughts, convinces us we’re not enough, and makes us feel alone when in truth we’re deeply connected. I wanted to capture how those illusions fall away when we choose harmony over comparison, connection over pride. 

Another song inspired by ShAnkAri’s brilliant mind and astrological insight. Thanks sis!! 🫶😘❤️🫂



LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
Whispers in the dark, a shadow at my side
Telling me I’m broken, that I’ve got to hide
It feeds on doubt, it twists the truth inside
A masquerade of power, but it’s all a lie

[Pre-Chorus]
It says I’m alone, I’m fighting to survive
But I’m a part of something greater, still alive

[Chorus]
Ego’s lie, it tells me I’m not enough
Builds a wall of pain, makes me call it love
But I see the cracks, I won’t be deceived
Ego’s lie can’t take what I believe

[Verse 2]
It wants me to rank, to climb a useless tower
To crush every rival, confuse strength with power
But harmony’s the circle, the truth we’ve denied
Not a pyramid of pride, but a bond that unites

[Pre-Chorus]
It says I’m alone, I’m fighting to survive
But I’m a part of something greater, still alive

[Chorus]
Ego’s lie, it tells me I’m not enough
Builds a wall of pain, makes me call it love
But I see the cracks, I won’t be deceived
Ego’s lie can’t take what I believe

[Verse 3]
Pain becomes the anchor, it chains me to the night
But even in the silence, I can feel the light
Every soul’s a circle, every cell a flame
Together we’re the organism, never just a name

[Bridge]
Oh, ego loves the suffering
Oh, but I won’t play its game
I’ll rise above the whispering
And call it by its name

[Chorus]
Ego’s lie, it tells me I’m not enough
Builds a wall of pain, makes me call it love
But I see the cracks, I won’t be deceived
Ego’s lie can’t take what I believe

[Chorus]
Ego’s lie, it feeds on the disguise
But harmony reveals it, truth opens my eyes
I break the chains, I step into the sky
No more living for the ego’s lie
Ego's lie

[Chorus X2]
Ego’s lie, it tells me I’m not enough
Builds a wall of pain, makes me call it love
But I see the cracks, I won’t be deceived
Ego’s lie can’t take what I believe

[Outro]
The circle keeps turning, the organism breathes
Ego fades to silence, no more lies to weave
I’m a voice in the chorus, and I’m finally free
From the ego’s lie that once defined me

Ego’s Lie

Pour l’épisode 41, je reçois Jerpa, figure centrale de la scène électronique slovène, DJ et co-fondateur des événements Sinergia et du Flows Festival. Présent sur les scènes de festivals comme Balance, Endorphin, Flows ou Castle Festival, il s’est également produit dans les clubs phares de la région, de Ljubljana à Zagreb.

Inspiré par des légendes telles que Hernan Cattaneo ou Nick Warren, Jerpa propose des sets à la fois progressifs, mélodiques et narratifs, où chaque track participe à un voyage émotionnel. En parallèle, il anime le podcast Sinergia Flows, véritable vitrine internationale pour les artistes de la scène progressive.

Pour Jerpa, le dancefloor est un lieu de connexion. Sa mission ? Raconter une histoire à travers la musique, pour que chacun puisse y vivre quelque chose d’intense et de partagé.

@jerpamusic

Tracklist:

river - Frozen (Dunadry Remix)
Durante, PaulWetz - Evaporate ft. PaulWetz
Zahna - Clover (Andres Moris Remix)
Enzo Paradiso, Chär Spinelli - Atemporal
Nu & Jo.Ke - Who Loves the Sun (Aiwaska Remix)
Rodrigo Pochelu, Diego Acosta (UY) - Tomorrows World
Albuquerque, Anonimat - Like First Time Flight (Shai T Extended Remix)
Paul & Return - You Can Have It All (Peter Makto & Matthew Sona Remix)
M.O.S. - Nanda
Govinda, Gonzalo Sacc & Franco Leonardini - Standing (Diego Acosta & Enzo Paradiso Remix)
Sebastien Leger - Gaufrette
Eagles & Butterflies - Dance With Me (Sunrise Mix)

Into The Woods #41 /\ Guest: Jerpa

Dzhef - Sitran (Linear Remix) [Solamar]

Recovery

Not Afraid

Salute

HIStory - PAST, PRESENT AND FUTURE - BOOK I

They Don't Care About Us

We Sold Our Soul for Rock 'N' Roll

War Pigs

Eminem - Donald Trump Diss "Explicit"



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Kuseim

Eminem - Donald Trump Diss "Explicit"

Get To Know You ft. Pip Millett out now! | @pip-millett

--> https://Moods.lnk.to/GetToKnowYou

grab / stream

Get To Know You Feat. Pip Millett

My official remix for @bondax.

-> bondax.lnk.to/realthingremixes

Bondax - Real Thing ft. Andreya Triana (Moods Remix)

Download 'Good Nights & Bad Mornings 2: The Hangover' now: http://bit.ly/GNBM2
Produced by ID Labs

Download GNBM2

Lord Be With You

Moods - Love Is Real (Sincere EP out now)

Ingen kommentar

I Am My Mother’s Savage Daughter

Songwriting has been a lifelong passion for me, dating back to elementary school when I first began crafting stories, poems, and eventually lyrics. As a former drummer in various bands, I always relied on others to bring my words to life musically. However, after a long hiatus from drumming, I decided to take the leap and learn to compose music to accompany my lyrics. Through classes and dedication, I've embarked on a new journey, breathing fresh life into old lyrics and penning new ones. You'll find a mix of older and newer works here. Especially for some of the lyrics. 

Music has been a part of me for as long as I can remember. One of my earliest memories is being completely entranced by 'The Little Drummer Boy' as a very young child. There was something about the rhythm and the melody that just captivated me. I must have played it a thousand times, wearing the record out, and from that moment on, I was hooked. I knew I wanted to be a drummer and to create that magic for others. 

But I was too young then, and of course, I couldn't afford a drum set just yet. So, I turned to writing as a way to express myself. As I mentioned above, I started with stories, then poems, and eventually, lyrics. I found that writing was not only a way to tap into my creativity, but also a way to process my emotions and experiences. 

As I grew older, my love for music only deepened. I realized that music has this incredible power to transport us to different times and places, to evoke emotions and memories that we thought were long forgotten. It's a universal language that can bring people together like nothing else can. 

For me, writing lyrics is a cathartic experience. It's a way for me to tap into my emotions, to process the world around me, and to create something that I hope will resonate with others. And when I hear my words come to life in a song, it's truly magical. It's a feeling that never gets old, and it's what keeps me coming back to music time and time again. 

I love many genres of music and artists of many genres. And if you listen to some of my songs, you will find that I like to make songs of different genres as well as mix different genres into each song. One of my all-time favorite bands is Evanescence, and I have made a lot of songs where I have tried my best to emulate that sound. 

Now, I have recently started experimenting with new sounds. I never heard of glitch beats before I took music classes, and now I'm fascinated with the sound, so I have been experimenting with glitch beats recently. 

I hope you enjoy some of my songs. And thanks so much to everyone who has been listening so far. I truly appreciate it. I welcome constructive feedback to help me grow as an artist, and I appreciate your support. ❤️

BTW if you follow me, I will ALWAYS follow back. If I like your music, I will follow you, but if you don't follow me back within a week or so I will probably unfollow. The same goes for when I see someone listening to my music, I WILL follow, however, if they don't follow me back within a week or so, I'll unfollow, because I'm at my limit of follows and I want to follow back everyone who follows me. Did not know that SoundCloud limits us to following only 2000. 😢

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VickStiX's Artist Manifesto
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I am the static between truth and noise.
A pulse that cracks the silence open.
When the world forgets its conscience,
I remind it — one beat, one lyric, one spark.

I don’t shout to divide; I sing to awaken.
I don’t chase fame; I chase clarity.
My art is not a weapon — it’s a flare in the dark.
A signal to every soul that still believes in better.

Let the trolls rage, let the cowards hide.
They can’t drown out a voice that’s tuned to truth.
I will paint their lies in sound and light
until justice has a melody again.

Because protest is not anger — it’s hope with a megaphone.
And I was born to be loud.

🎶 VickStiX — Truth. Rhythm. Revolution.










