Maybe I said too much
by saying nothing at all
I always feel so tense
smothered in cortisol
you want a picket fence
I am a concrete wall
lacking in common sense
smelling of alcohol

grass in the cracks of the warm desert concrete
faded graffiti in alleys and backstreets
discarded pages of tabloid magazines
these are the things that we passed on the way home
Opened the door to our messy apartment
you said some things and then i said some things too
you went upstairs and when I tried to follow
you said that you wanted to be alone and then
 
the argument faltered into screaming and violence
torn up upholstery into 2 weeks of silence
look at myself in the mirror that I shattered
guess it distorted my self reflection

All caught in 4K and burned into my mind
Put in on rewind and watch it in real time
I can remember all of the details
except the reason it even started

When did you realize it just doesn't matter
who's in the wrong when it's wrong in the first place
sarcastic answers to cynical questions 
indignant words from the top of the staircase

recurring nightmares of sentences spoken
resentment born over promises broken
I wasn't sure as to what I was doing
all that was built was destroyed in a moment

maybe its true that it's all predetermined
maybe it's true that is runs in the family
maybe the past correlates to the future
if not exactly at least indirectly

but I like to think we're more than a program
recursive functions repeating forever
just like a highway with multiple exits
if you miss yours you just can just take the next one

We can remember the good times that we had
analyze data - reverse engineer it
back to a save state before it all went bad
and laugh at ourselves like "what the hell were we thinking"

Discard the days that consist of the same thing
wasting our time on the mundane and boring
fix all the bugs and rewrite the ending
where you slammed the door without even a last goodbye

recursive functions repeating forever

Recursive Functions

You Worry Me

Credit to @𓃬 for saving this song.

This was not on Penguinband's Soundcloud at the time he deleted it.

Chainsaw Suicide Doomer - Penguinband

I don't know
I don't know 
I don't know
I don't know

Where'd you go
I want to know

I'm burning with memories
you come back like PTSD
you feel like a lethal disease
the way you make me feel so empty

I don't know
I don't know 
I don't know
I don't know

Where'd you go
I want to know

I'm burning with memories
you come back like PTSD
you feel like a lethal disease
the way you make me feel so empty

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Nothin Good

Going back where I belong,
To the place that I called home.
 
Turns out to be destroyed now, oohh.

Seven silent lights, seven silent lights,
Watching over the steel, as the machines ignite.
Seven silent lights, seven silent lights,
Glowing faint above the ruins of shattered might.

Tracks carve scars into the stone,
Engines hum, but we are all alone.

The land I knew, it is gone now, oohh.  

Seven silent lights, seven silent lights,
Watching over the steel, as the machines ignite.
Seven silent lights, seven silent lights,
Glowing faint above the ruins of shattered might.

Seven silent lights

Dont know if i’m retarded
Do you even know
I’m a fucking retard baby, and i’m against it all

I’m against

im a racist faggot loser and i think im a little retarded

ur fat ass
makes my eyes go where i cant
pretty face i dont have a clue how old she is
its wonderul
i love uu sooooooo

Ty parzival for collabing with me <3
parzival : https://on.soundcloud.com/pjy8VF73co3K8NRU6


I wanna believe
All the years of indoctrination
I wanna be
A normie with a vaccination
On my knees before the name of Science

I wanna see
Equality and emasculation
I'll feel guilty
For being born a Caucasian

Tell my dreams to the CIA
Cause all the normal people are turning gay
I don't want them to think I'm dangerous
So I'll buy the things and I won't have kids
And I'll masturbate and I'll stay inside
And I'll watch tv til my suicide
And I'll video game and I'll never pray
And I'll smoke the evil thoughts away
And I'll hate dissent and I'll stay in line
I'll be complicit in my genocidе
And I'll mutilate my dignity
I'll be the last branch in my family tree
I'll bе the last branch in my family tree
I'll be the last branch



:(

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