Lyrics:
i just wish that you would hate me, cause you know im gonna hate me too
cause i fuck up on the daily, and i miss you but its day old news
i just wanted you to save me, and i thought that i could save you too
we were looking for some safety, maybe, baby say goodbye because i hate you and im fading

i dont want this life, and you said "okay"
so dont hit my line, cause i know you wont stay
and now if i die, you wont know anyway
so i said goodbye, and now im nothing but a stray

i been lost inside my mind like every day
i got fucked up thoughts and i got more on the way
should i just peace out and end it like i always say
but i count to a hundred then i face another day yeah

you can tell that you won, when i ghost and i run
feel the smoke in my lungs, then i choke and im done
hope i die in my sleep, when i pass out counting sheep
feel the tears on my cheek, waiting for my soul to reap

i dug my grave just for me
i heard that death is lonely
but so is life if you know me
kill parts of me that i dont need

alright alright, i guess i finally understand
july july, you got my heart still in your hands
im not alright this didnt go like how i planned
im giving up ill never be the same again

im giving up ill never be the same again

Hate Me

hateme

Brenden James: guitar, production & vocals

Short And Sweet.

this is a demo

prod. deadbeatteen
photo from spencer

seven foot casket
glued to my mattress
thinking about how
you hate my dimensions
if i coulda changed 'em
i don't need to mention
i'd morph to your ideal
idea of perfection
like 1,2, you can run away if you need to
isn't that, just like you
it's what you always do
3,4, out the back door
now you're feelin sore
but don't unpack things
that would be a bore
you don't know the power that you have
one text and you can break me
but those been scarce lately
i'll say i'm okay
but i'm not
you're not mine
i swear i do this all the time
hyperfixate on something perfect
i can't attain, and it leaves me hurting
i don't have the luxury of running away
i just sit
and just face
all these things in my brain
and it is not a mystery
the things that you say
but we can still pretend
that you want me to stay

seven foot casket

fuck you, and fuck your friends

thank you @deadbeatteen for allowing me to finish this song
and a big thank you everyone who listens <3

SPOTIFY

catastrophe (w/ deadbeatteen)

Eyes Without a Face (retroboy remix)

Ethel Cain - Concrete(extended prod.postumo)

Chamber Of Darkness

Punish (Demo II)

deadbeatteen - S.O.HB.

Golden Age (Piano Version) - Single

ethel cain - golden age (piano version - slowed & reverb)

Forgive me father for I have synthed

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Check out YNG Retroboy (@YRetroboy): https://twitter.com/YRetroboy?s=09

Eyes Without a Face (retroboy remix)

RetroBøy