crash&burn ft. Rabz & kennedyxoxo *johnny friend*

now i’m wanting to die 
take the knife and twist it baby
i’m over this life 
know that i tried 
swear to god don’t say you miss me 
cause it’d be a lie  
 
new face, new lovers :/
i’m still stuck on the old one 
i’m sorry now 
still cold 
same covers 
cry myself to sleep 
cause ur not around 

yeah oh i guess fuck all and my mental 
drowning i’m sentimental 
don’t even want to help myself 
yeah oh took my heart and disassembled 
swearing that you were gentle 
nobody hears a cry for help :/

swear to god, don't say you miss me [drma]

crumbling everywhere i go to, lately 
breaking down nowadays is something, daily 
i swear i tried but i can't seem to escape this trapped in a maze where every corner's an abyss

it seems like no1's trynna save me 
no helping hands, no calls nor texts
they just leave me to face it
got no support, full of remorse i need you to embrace me 
in ur arms, they sooth the scars and make me just forget this

u didn't care u din't ask
all our love's fading fast 
hit me sudden like a crash 
watch us both turn into ash 

make of my heart a cast
pour hot iron on my chest
watch me fail to catcha breath
as my body slowly melts r 

and i’ll sit alone
my phones on dnd 
but it wouldn’t matter 
no one checks on me 
and they’ll say they care
but don’t listen closely 
they’ll say they care 
when i finally can’t breathe 

friends hit me for a feature 
but they’ve never shared my songs 
and i’ll pretend it’s cool 
cause it’s not worth i’ll play along  
so i may be a narcissist 
please say that it’s okay 
cause if i do not love myself 
then that leaves no one loving me 

i walk alone 
drag broken bones 
they throw their stones 
and go for my throat 
i’ll turn off my phone 
and i’ll keep it closed 
cause i don’t need anyone to know where i’ll go

u didn't care u din't ask
all our love's fading fast 
hit me sudden like a crash 
watch us both turn into ash 

make of my heart a cast
pour hot iron on my chest
watch me fail to catcha breath
as my body slowly melts r

casperrr & geist - cast (pekarot)

angels of porn II ( nicole dollanganger - cover )

prod by Liminaldream

blink, im 24
theres still things i cant be rid of
i think i could do more
feeling younger than i am

fell distant from my friends
things felt different on my end 
i feel my stomach sinking when

standing over a hole i cant fill
going nowhere, im at a standstill
this october, it weighs like anvils

and i could last 
this december
find my flame 
in dying embers 
find my passion
and it wont change how fast im aging 
i cant take it 
i cant

blink

honestly i hate this song, but thanks for listening

prod me

ooh oh 
oh let go of my hand 
ill cry alone because i feel like I'm less of a man
the older i get
 the more i realize how much of a failure i am 
i still feel like a kid
 talk all you want but i still feel like shit
im still finding my way to be happier 
oh i wish i was
ohhh oh 
dear mom and dad
oh im so sorry i gave into my thoughts again
oh god i feel stupid 
i contradict everything
in fucking useless 
hmm 
feel like I'm less of a man
(feel like I'm less of a man)
feel like I'm less of a man
(feel like I'm less of a man)

twenty

produced by mix
happy new years everyone!

enjoy <3

lyrics:
take a look into my eyes
if you saw you might just cry
i'm a piece of everything before me
just wait and you will see

been awhile since you saw me
now my hair is different
gained a couple new scars
i just gotta live it
and i lost my best friend
yea i buried her
lost of blisters on my hands
i just miss her fur

and everything, how could you just let it be?
and im stuck back in the past and all that happened to me, ohh
you were so sweet, you were so sweet
those hours just now hurt

won't pick up the phone, come talk to me
i think i gotta new baby

it was wrong of you, but is this wrong me?

and ill never know if you cheated on me
but how you left it was awfully breeze

i'd sing this song for you but this ones just for me

and i wish you hope and the best in life
i couldn't never hate you even if i tried

i waited long for you, i don't regret a thing
now im moving on in life, never thought id say that i 
(and i thought that i was gone)

BUT YOU SHOWED ME I WAS WRONG

fly high (it's infinite) so high (isn't it?)
in the sky, i can fly
fly high (it's infinite) so high (isn't it?)
IN THE SKY, I CAN- I CAN FLY

i lost so many friends, bear and pine
my tears and burnt up ends
wished for a better time
those stones that were built for two
i wished but i never knew
now those scars begin to fade
im not mad i trusted you

FOUND A LOVE I NEVER KNEW
INSIDE MYSELF, IM OUTSIDE NEW
THOSE STONES THAT WERE BUILT FOR TWO
NOW IT'S CRACKED NOW, HOLLOWED THROUGH
A LITTLE CYAN IN YOUR EYE
I WIPED IT OFF, THOSE TEARS FROM YOU
A LITTLE BRUSTLE IN YOUR HEART
THATS LIFE, THATS LIFE BECAUSE OF YOU

because of you
that's life because of you

a little brustle inside your heart
i lost my friends and it all fell apart 
but now its over now, yea i found someone new
i love you, love you, love you, love you, love you too

and i'm happy i met you, i'm not mad at you ever
i hope you live a good life, i'm glad we could end this fight
<3

brustle

prod by me

- lyrics -
people keep on talking thinking they know who i am
im not the person everyone says that i am
he's like a brother i cant stop thanking for what he's done
its been a long road and made all this so fun

been a few years but it just started
seeing comments keep me bothered
praying i can walk the road
that shares path with who i owe

yet im scared to lose the friends i made through this
so many times i ponder if i could be missed
dont feel strong enough to bury out the mist
cause a grave seems so comforting

running in my head to think what i shouldve said
i plunder every thought to one day fill it with lead
i wish to stick around but my promises are dead
lay into my bed and think into the depth
see it all to startle me
jsut wishing for some therapy
i base it all of who i am on this

got some friends who switched up
try to get theyre way
feel a knot in my chest
wont it go away
overheard once again
you wont be the same
funny how your always tryna go & shift the blame

yuh uh
look at all the dread you make
such a pest you wont ever see brighter days
think your right gate your friends soon will be the end
not a single soul consider you a real friends
look at the way you talk
stutter on your words whenever it was ever brought up
butcherd image yet your not done in your heinous ways
walk the walk you will always sit in all this shame
-----------------------------------------

flower petals ✾

pride//shame

who am i to change the tides?

spotify: https://open.spotify.com/intl-de/album/1a6wPdH3iqDPr3Q61TPwYm?si=GGcabW1hRxSG4XmJRW7JDQ

lyrics:
And I thought "Oh, just you look at the tide"
The way it all just comes waves and by their laws we abide
You ask how I wash up on shore while it eats you alive 
When I just try to manage 
Whatever happens's valid 
So if we end on different poles,  hope you still feel my pull 
And if poseidon took his medicine our path could subdue 
But some things we just dont control, so, like, what should I do?
'Cus I don't get it either 
And I would rather steer, but—
But who am I to intrude?

Why, with all this pressure around us
I have to watch my watery eyes? 

Oh, there's no point to fight the elements 
My lungs pick up the resonance
Of what it is inside the air 
And hits my brain as evident 
In knowledge of my rotten core
I'm headed for the ocean floor
And hope there's nothing to be scared of 
That I cannot ignore 

And if fate will, we'll make it in time 
And just my hands in front my face are gon' suffice 
Of course it hurt me and I hurt you alike
But back in Venice I remember how I smiled

And I thought "Oh, just you look at the tide"
The way it all just comes waves and by their laws we abide
You ask how I wash up on shore while it eats you alive 
When I just try to manage 
Whatever happens's valid 
So if we end on different poles,  hope you still feel my pull 
And if poseidon took his medicine our path could subdue 
But some things we just dont control, so, like, what should I do?
'Cus I don't get it either 
And I would rather steer, but—
But who am I to intrude?

it comes in waves | prod. majora

produced by: ilyl1ght 
lyrics:
why do i do this to myself?
i swear that  im building a hell for us 
just you don’t want anyone else 
i try but it feels like im not enough 
and oh it eats slowly at me oh
if only you saw what i see oh 

𝙞𝙩𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞 𝙙𝙤𝙣'𝙩 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙤𝙧 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙢𝙚 
𝙞𝙩𝙨 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩, 𝙞 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙨𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙙 
𝙛𝙖𝙘𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙛𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙨 
𝙞 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪

i feels like i’ve nowhere to go
your not here and im trying to cope 
that look in your eyes feels like home 
home, home 
ohh 
with you it feels like i belong 
with you i don’t feel im alone 
ohhh

why do i do this to myself?
i swear that  im building a hell for us 
just you don’t want anyone else 
i try but it feels like im not enough 
and oh it eats slowly at me oh
if only you saw what i see ohh

you, i wont cope in a world without you
i wont live in a world without you 

<3

comfort

🎧 DJ Mistiek – Papa Jij Bent M’n Held
Deze track is speciaal gemaakt voor mijn dochter.
Een tedere ode aan onze unieke band – vol liefde, trots en de kleine momenten die alles betekenen.

Met warme melodieën en oprechte emotie vertel ik in muziek wat woorden soms niet kunnen zeggen.
Zij noemt mij haar held… maar eigenlijk is zíj die van mij. ❤️

—
🎶 Genre: emotionele electronic / chill / melodic
💙 Voor wie ooit geraakt werd door de liefde tussen ouder en kind
🧡 Een muzikale herinnering voor het leven

#DJMistiek #PapaJijBentMnHeld #VoorMijnDochter

brustle

mix≬