pls go mainstream my man, u are underated..

я просто обожаю твой голос

spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/5tAXiV5Ty4zKs0Bjd45qXr?si=075203ff1f204884

p. joshwa (@prodbyjoshwa)
mix n master by me
sc compressor is a pain
my best song, hope you enjoy

///
making up some stupid shit that doesnt matter at all
i fucking hate it here, wish i was never involved
i swear i'll move across the country fucking hate it all
i swear if you were in my shoes you would just take them off
and it's not like i'm trying,
to be what you want
i cannot put up with lying,
or tell me it's my fault
so don't you dare look in my eyes and act like you're so appalled
i get hurt so many times, i guess it's all just my fault

breathe
why cant you,
see
that it's all a little too much for me
it's getting hard to breathe
can't do this constantly
oh you've been bothering me so,
breathe
why cant you,
see
that it's all a little too much for me
it's getting hard to breathe
can't do this constantly
oh you've been bothering me so,

don't give a fuck bout what the cost is
i've been feeling nauseous
laying in my bed and you would be the one to start shit
don't know where i fuckin' lost it
"what's with you and being honest?"
yea you told me it'd get better, and you motherfuckin' promised
yea i got this dream
that you were nowhere near me
that you would fucking fear me
look in my eyes so clearly,
fed up with you
yea you watch and reuse
how i fall apart,
and i don't know what to do so,

breathe
why cant you,
see
that it's all a little too much for me
it's getting hard to breathe
can't do this constantly
oh you've been bothering me so,
breathe
why cant you,
see
that it's all a little too much for me
it's getting hard to breathe
can't do this constantly
oh you've been bothering me so

breathe

what’s that you said
not gon’ shut up
feelings i can’t keep up
i don’t want 
i don’t need you
i don’t love you
i just needed stability 
i’m so broke down and fidgety 
but
but i was hoping that
we could go back to that time where i hold you baby
i don’t need shit but a macc for my safety 
double 03 put a hole in ur baby 
i’m outside getting high on the daily

throwing up
this early 
i dont wanna be grown now,
dont worry
treat me like a nuisance
lets fucking do this
beaten and bruised
put that fucker to use
come and pour that risotto
my main thang move jus like a model
niggas knocking on my head i guess im hollow

lets kill the lights out
i know
i know
you're fucking my life up
right on 
right on

growin up

bitter deed

spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/16aPg17al8DKBm8LyMn4eE?si=9f8e74ca0f344527
all plats: https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/spoder/cd-feat-ry-2

guitar by othello
additional production by me and ryan
written and performed by me and ryan
with @rywrrd (show him love please)

i lied i'm sorry next one will be a summer tune <3
thank you for listening always :)

///
a toast,
play your cd
the music brings you peace
alone
so don't mind me
I had a stupid dream again

you thought you had from the start
I don't want have to break your heart
but it broke
and now that cd drowns in static
a sour note
I highly doubt it

your favourite song
your radio I turn it on
we fell in love in your shitty car
with static on your heart
screaming out our favourite part

I made a stupid decision
in my mind, clouded dumb inference
I gave it all that I had
but all I had was indifferent
I'd break my arms off to help you
if it meant that you would listen
I stare and talk to the wall
scratched disc had tarnished the image
I thought I loved you

cd w/ ry

Thousand Miles

@1spoder
prod roku
https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/spoder/bruise

lyrics -
open up the fuckin door hun
is this everything you wanted?
tell me did you really wanna
tell me did you really wanna
pop another bottle up
tell me is it lust is it really love
pop another bottle up
is it really lust is it really love
can you see what I see
through your stupid lies
it gets harder to breathe
every time

walk it down
throw it up love
love to be the one that you want
I keep falling down, keep falling out
did everything you told me to
talk every way you want me to
fuck it up
it's a dud
I don't love you
I tried it, no use
stuck in silence I bruise (I feel overwhelmed)
stuck in silence I bruise (I tried)
stuck in silence I bruise

are you amused?
go tie up that noose (it's all my fault)
acting like you nuanced and shit
alright love then burn off that bridge
tell me love how I'm supposed to live
kick yo feet up
wanna be us
she want more not enough
is it all you dream of
all you need love
fall in now I'm stuck
will you pull through?
I don't like you no more

can you see what I see
through your stupid lies
it gets harder to breathe
every time

walk it down
throw it up love
love to be the one that you want
I keep falling down, keep falling out
did everything you told me to
talk every way you want me to
fuck it up
it's a dud
I don't love you
I tried it, no use
stuck in silence I bruise (I feel overwhelmed)
stuck in silence I bruise (I tried)
stuck in silence I bruise

spoder - bruise

demo 2

i don't know how to say it
if it keeps on i'll be emaciated
another product of harming
crash, fall
i don't wanna be here at all
don't catch me if i fall down
another product of harming
crash, fall
i can't seem to find it, it's lost
the boy i was before
why have grown disheartened
crash, fall

mind my mind you
pick my fights
hand my life over
i rest my soul down been at it since october
don't lie to yourself you're not a toler
you barely know her
think she a showman
petty scars all over
you should've known then
it gets too heavy to breathe
i'm pleading down on my-
i stay up grinding my teeth
my flesh is ready to eat

i don't know how to say it
if it keeps on i'll be emaciated
another product of harming
crash, fall
i don't wanna be here at all
don't catch me if i fall down
another product of harming
crash, fall
i can't seem to find it, it's lost
the boy i was before
why have grown disheartened
crash, fall

product of harm

2poder

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