Produced by Michael Harrison
Mixed and mastered by me
Lyrics by me

Multiply the reasons why I don’t wanna be alive
I’m such a cunt, that’s what you said, but I don’t seem to mind
'Cause we are only human, something you don’t realize 
Girl, we can only try, it’s just apart of life, so

Realign the words I say 
You’re not in love with me 
You do not love me babe 
I don’t wanna try
Girl, do you even mind if I don’t feel all right? 
I just wanna cry
I’m so petrified, girl, I don’t wanna fight
So I guess I’ll leave
I’ll leave you, I’ll leave town
I’ll head west, you’ll go south 
It’s apart of life, part of life, part of life
Damn, I really wish that you were around 
It’s apart of life, part of life, part of life

Every day I wonder why you’re never by my side 
I realize that every time it’s always suicide 
And you said I would never change, never change 
But you know it goes either way, either way 
And you always said that I was a jerk 
And I won’t be offended 'cause I know you’re hurt 
I did the best I ever could, ever could
But I was never any good, any good
And my friends said they sober, but I don’t believe them
'Cause they were always older, and I was under them
And I bet when I’m 17, 17 
That it’ll be the end of me, so

I realign the words I say 
You’re not in love with me 
You do not love me babe 
I don’t wanna try
Girl, do you even mind if I don’t feel all right? 
I just wanna cry
I’m so petrified, girl, I don’t wanna fight
So I guess I’ll leave
I’ll leave you, I’ll leave town
I’ll head west, you’ll go south 
It’s apart of life, part of life, part of life
Damn, I really wish that you were around 
It’s apart of life, part of life, part of life

Girl, I don’t want any part of this 
But you’ve got my blood stained on your cardigan 
And I did all this, just to fall apart again 
And now I fall again, while you fall for other men 
I realigned the words I say 
You’re not in love with me 
You do not love me babe 
You want everything
I gave you every bit of me
Oh I tried, oh I tried 
Oh I tried

apart of life [p. michael harrison]

prod miercoles
vocals @celestefallen (me) + additional vocals @b8r
shoutout @dramatrial for the among us ambience in the intro

lrtyiscew :
(among us ambience)

why are u
always on my mind .. ?
i don't have time 
i'd figured u
would forget me2
i know it's hard
but u need to let me go 
oh i don't wanna be
the one that runs away
anymore
is that too much to ask for .. ?

open that door
and walk out
you've done it before
so why not now ?
there's no more second chances
i already gave u three more

so what are u waiting for ?
what are u waiting for ?
i already told u there's no more us
leave it all in the dust
i need to find better people to trust
cause i can't keep this up (creamer reference)
maybe i just need to sober up
when is it ever enough ?
walk a mile in my shoes
u know how bad it'd be 
if half the things i said were true

oh i wish u knew
i hated the things u do
there's no turning back now
all i can do is stop and stare

@b8r - outro
ahhhhhh
ahh yada yada yada u get the point

(rain ,
thunder)

shy away (miercoles)

a lil old song i finally bought the beat 2 dis teehee
prod wixxy
mix + master me

6/15/23 ,, a lot of revisions up until january ? i think

lye9dewcis :
oh i spend
so much of my time
running running running
just trying to get to u .. :/

i wont ever get the time back
just trying to the most out of it
stg ur doing this on purpose
(on purpose baby , trying to test ur luck )
oh whoa oh

what i see in ur eyes can melt me
and ive been stuck losing my mind i need u to help me
and now im back at square one baby im a lost soul
oh
oh im a lost so o o o oul
promise me u wont let it go
say that u love me but did u really mean it tho ?
it just feels like we're slowly growing apart

but now ur out of my reach
cant ever win u back
win u back
win u back
ur the only person that i want
next to me :c

what i see in ur eyes can melt me
and ive been stuck losing my mind i need u to help me
and now im back at square one baby im a lost soul
oh
oh im a lost so o o o oul
promise me u wont let it go
say that u love me but did u really mean it tho ?
it just feels like we're slowly growing apart

*l

growingapart

probably the longest ive held off on dropping a song but now it's here :p
produced by wixxy

original cover gone .forever

4/7/23

lyirosd :
the other day was the first time i laid my eyes on u
and that's when i knew

i fucked my life up
falling into this cycle
again and again and again
and i can't help it
what will i ever do ?

don't tell me what i can and cannot do
i cannot feel
the only thing i wanna feel is ur touch
but ur barely out of my reach
and just like that i see u with somebody new
wish i knew sooner

maybe i just have to let u go
how will i change if i never grow ?
the last thing i knew

i'm falling into this old habit of mine
think im okay ?, im the opposite of fine
i just need somebody there , there

don't tell me what i can and cannot do
i cannot feel
the only thing i wanna feel is ur touch
but ur barely out of my reach
and just like that i see u with somebody new
wish i knew sooner

*m

appearance

@b8r
made in oct 2023

leyrdics ;
you lost me the second you brought up
him
oh is he better than me ?
you know how hard i try to be
myself ?

seeing these golden brown leaves
as they fall onto your palm
pray for a better day
ohhh

jealousy oh jealousy
it got the best of me
atleast that's what i believe ...

...
...

ooh i can't wait
anymore
for some better days :/
by the end my hair will turn gray
i said nothing wrong
so don't act that way
oh don't act that way

pray for some better days ...
i won't be here
forever </3

better days II (favour)

some lyrics taken from brave/afraid by mental :)
my singing was absolutely terrible on this song lol

lyitas :
i fell in love with you
the second i laid my eyes on you
feelings that i never thought i'd get back into
hold me tight and don't wanna cry
what if i don't get to see you in another life
where would i be if it wasn't for you
but i'm afraid of everything
and you're my everything so i'm scared of you
and i keep thinking to myself
is it even worth it ?
trying to pretend that i don't even care
when i really do
you said that i was brave
i don't wanna prove you wrong
but i'm afraid of everything
and you're my everything so i'm scared of you
right now i need you more than ever
you telled (wtf ?? i meant to say told) you'd stay here by me forever
so when is forever gonna be ?

*a

stay here forever prod idly blare

prod wixxy
made on 12/31/2023 , finished about a year later :)
this started off originally as a joke but when i tried to record an actual song over this beat i couldn't stop thinking about these lyrics lol

(yea i still said 2023 in the song but no one has to know that ... keep this between us)

lytrtiocas :
la da da
la da da
there's thirty two days
thirty two days in december
ya ya

uh
i know
there's thirty two days in december
how do you not know ? 
it's not even hard to remember
is it new years ?
or is it the thirty second ?
i shouldn't have to even tell you this

(thirty two days , thiry two days)
(oh ho)

thirty two days i promise this ain't fake
it's always been like that , don't know what to tell you
i've never been one to lie
so when i tell you , don't act surprised
how could you live your life
not knowing this not knowing this oh ho

(you're on your own now)
(i really tried to help you)

uh
i know
there's thirty two days in december
how do you not know ? 
it's not even hard to remember
is it new years ?
or is it the thirty second ?
i shouldn't have to even tell you this

(thirty two-hoo-oo-oo)

[digicore part]
thirty two days , there's thirty two days
and if you think otherwise you can sayit2myface
thirty two days , we're still in 2023
this year fucking sucks i hope the next one is better
i had my best and worst moments
s/o @funkops and to like all my friends
i wouldn't be here right now if it weren't for them

nah but fr tho
happy new years guys
have a nice 2024 !! :D
and uh
i hope ...
i hope next year gets better
and remember
there's thirty two days ^_^

there's-thirty-two-days-in-december

i'll think about finishing this song but i can't guarantee that i won't hate the final product

you and i don't work out
so i'll set everything we ever had on fire
watch it all burn , burn to the ground
everything i did everything i said
what was i doing it all for
if it wasn't real love
oh you were a waste of my time
glad i was able to say goodbye

a perfect time to say goodbye prod keltecs

@lucybedroque @lucybedroque @lucybedroque
(scrapped off unmusique, BUT lucy so kindly let me drop dis for yall <33)
prod ivvys, mental, synthetic and noah

a perfect time to say goodbye prod keltecs

celeste* [2]