Beat poetry version of BEHOLDEN.
Read by Dana Jerman ( Dj DMJ )
Backing Vocals: Nataja
Beats: Spencer Cooley 
Words, Concept: C. Renee Kiser 
©RaVenGhost Publishing 2023
(Song version is here):
https://soundcloud.com/76-88-76/beholden-joke-is-by-crk-featuring-dj-dmj-and-nataja
Visit Dana: https://soundcloud.com/jerman-dm

> Words:

(walk the dog, or wear the collar...)

Joke is

on him...

Added me to his collection
crooked cabinet, another shot glass
I vowed to forget his erection
and his clown shoe up my tiny ass
Sold me a smile and a fantasy
Every laugh so calculated
But I went hunting for a story
Served my heart, so he ate it

Now I don't blame a dog
for being a dog,  lessons tethered
But a dog can't beat a wolf
He'll be sorry (th)ey ever endeavored
Took the bait and seemed convinced
that he raped me of my sanity
Joke is- a poet's born unhinged
to report the punchline of society

(walk the dog or wear the collar...)

zig zag reality, how long can we
drown in self-deception, open
the doors of perception... and we
wolves accept and howl, beholden

Cheers to the hungry, lost dogs
I hope you find a home, you know
I hope you get a good bath-
Get shined up one day and glow
I used to be a lost dog in gloom
but I've been a wolf for a while,
returning my hunger to the moon
I don't beg. And I hunt with style


*This was first published here:
https://horrorsleazetrash.com/2023/01/09/c-renee-kiser-6/

Photo credit: Dana Jerman & Friends

I Don't Beg / featuring Dj DMJ

I'll fill your house with an army

Pulls Me Apart

THIS LIFE I AIN’T LIVING
V1
Things are so expensive
It’s eat or pay the rent
Before my paycheck comes
My money’s already spent 

CHORUS
This life I ain’t living is killing me 
This life I ain’t living is killing me, oooh-oooh-oooh
Killing me, oooh-oooh-oooh 

V2
This country’s in trouble 
The world has turned its’ back
Hear the people moaning 
For the hope they lack

CHORUS
This life I ain’t living is killing me 
This life I ain’t living is killing me, oooh-oooh-oooh
Killing me, oooh-oooh-oooh 

V3
Try to do things right
Find out it’s all wrong
The men pulling the strings
Are few but they’re strong, oh

This life I ain’t living
This life I ain’t living

V4
Lock up the house tight
Another weekend alone
Nobody cares where you are
Nobody calls on the phone

CHORUS
This life I ain’t living is killing me 
This life I ain’t living is killing, killing me, oooh-oooh-oooh
Killing me, oooh-oooh-oooh

V5
Another broken promise
Another broken dream
Broken hearts all around
Hear the children scream

CHORUS/TAG
This life I ain’t living is killing me
This life I ain’t living is killing, killing me, oooh-oooh-oooh, oh!

This life I ain’t living
This life I ain’t living is killing, killing me..

Oooh-oooh-oooh, Oooh,-oooh-oooh

© 2025 Renee La Chapelle – All Rights Reserved


THIS LIFE I AIN’T LIVING

Sicambria

StressedSnail

Monsters in the Dark

Burning Up

Yea I'm stressed out 
don't wanna talk about it
cause I doubt 
you wouldn't give a f*ck about it
self doubt 
can't get myself up out of this
the hole that I put myself in
dug it out
put myself in it
don't know how it turned out 
like this 
all I know is I want out
I've had it 
I'm stressed out 
Stressed ooooOoOoout

Stressed out 
I got nothing left 
checked out
so much I regret 
feeling left out 
like I'm second best
don't know how to forgive 
and I can't forget 
yea my life's a mess 
I'm depressed 
and I'm 
stressed out

Yea I'm 
stressed out 
wish I 
could forget about 
what has me
stressed out
but I cant 
live without 
being 
stressed out

Stressed out

After listening to a friends track...I did this :)

Turn Up the Sound

Lyrics:

so ironic
i keep forgetting
the memories 

so haunted
i want nothing
but to be free

smoking so hard
i keep forgetting 
i exist 

nobody knows
who i really am
underneath 

I can’t tell if I’m still here
I can’t tell if I’m still here
I can’t tell if I’m still here
I can’t tell if I’m still here

where have i gone?
i feel like 
i’m about to disappear 

ticking time bomb
my chest is aching 
need to switch the gear

loving you was a war
that i fought 
against my own will 

i’ve made it this far
i still don’t know how
i swam through the tears

I can’t tell if I’m still here
I can’t tell if I’m still here
I can’t tell if I’m still here
I can’t tell if I’m still here

i pinch myself 
i can’t if i’m real 
but this is not a dream
this is not a drill

i dissociate 
get distracted by my fears
i guzzle down my nightmares
keep my enemies near 

looking out the window 
car rides and a few beers
i think i’m seeing angels 
and they urge me to steer

I can’t tell if I’m still here
I can’t tell if I’m still here
I can’t tell if I’m still here
I can’t tell if I’m still here

i can't tell if i'm still here (Demo)

twisted face that twists my faith
          damp my soul with your grace
          slip your tongue but dont slip my mind
	in your purest form you re the brother kind
	sudden frost disturbs your bed
	spend your time in crimson red

call me the devil babe and be my wild thing
you pick the song and i ll make you sing
dance real slow the dance we both know
the one learned in these lives we earned
call me the devil babe


	leather bound hand dropping hourglass sand
	whipped cream skin baby let me in
	i ll make you scream i can work that thing
	all i need, a little taste of your dream


call me the devil babe and be my wild thing
you pick the song and i ll make you sing
dance real slow, the dance we both know
the one learned in these lives we earned
call me the devil babe


Blood (Kid Moxie & j.s)

Monsters

PUNK POET*CONFESSIONAL QUEEN👑
✨🐌SNAIL WHISPERER🐌LYRICIST✨
FEARLESS INDIE:  I  AM  snail viXen.

(sometimes lyrical) PUNK POETRY
           xxx  DIY till' I DIE   xxx

🖤RaVenGh o s+  Press:
https://gutterkissesforyou.etsy.com
ESCAPE from NARC ISLAND avail now✨
Casey Renee Kiser's work (a.k.a. snail viXen) closely examines mainstream’s distorted ideas of beauty.
Always quirky and armed with bold confessional dynamite, her humor is uncompromising, often abrupt and unsettling. Her poems explore identity, emotional abuse, and healing from complicated relationships. She resides in a magical place called The Crystal Garden. Come on over, we have cookies ;) and healing, through dark poetry.
🖤At RaVenGhost Press, 
we work w/ the Darkness <
> to better understand the journey.
We say, Tell your story. 
Get it all out then,  let it go!
Don't take it with you. 
It's too heavy to carry up the mountain.

( or the mushroom, if you're a snail ;)

Disclaimer: 
I don't perfect my songs. They are art the way they come out. They are about the lyrics, not perfection.
✨Lyricist for Hire