life has not been very good to me recently

i try my best
so what
am i doing enough for you
you hate my fucking guts
and i hate yours too
and i try to make it right between us
but its all my fault and i cant break it
im sorry
oh im sorry
that i cant break my habits
i get that you get manic

people pleaser

cover of best friend by rex orange county

best friend

cuz "throwing in the towel" is too long lol

woah
i just rly wanna give up
ppl never know when its too much
it's never been that fun
i lost my head
whats it like to be dead?
i cut off all my friends
they never knew me to begin with

old friend of mine
ive been up all night
and im rly feelin hurt
got her face in the dirt
i could never know for sure
trippin up on words
but hey it could be worse!
(la la la)
burning up in my sweater
tryna hide my face in my sleeve when she answers
what about after?
i panicked when i met her
wonder if i like her
i wanna be her ever after

i just wanna go to sleep
words are cutting rly deep
ur in every fucking dream i have lately
ive seen this place before
its not dark at night
what the fuck is going on

towel song

i failed
oh darling
was your head in my hands not enough
pace my room for a couple bucks
i felt down for a couple months
did it all for a dumb ear
tell me theres no love left here
all the eyes disappoint
id rather die in this joint

pace

prod me
finding my sound still
spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/6wBXoXurLcSSyg46pVJe5d?si=074c408517e1434f



lyrics
im tired of trying to breathe
when you come around
you're the reason why im hating how my music sounds
this will be the death of me so bury me into the ground
i hope it's just a feeling but it's
always and always

like a puppet you're controlling me
i hope i'm always 17 in your memories
you know that i'll never leave
i don't know what is wrong with me
i need some melatonin i can never fall asleep
always and always

they're all transparent to me
but i can never read your mind
just say that it's fine
i'm still wasting my time again
i wish you were sitting right by my side
it's been a while since we last spoke
i'll tell you about the things that you want me to say
i'm wasting days after days
you always blow me away
i'm so out of place and it's so hard to find you
can you hear my heartbeat when you're pulling me closer
all i can think of is your four-leaf clover
so many times when i thought it was over
i just need some closure
(your hair on my shoulders)
will i save myself oh please
you set this up for me
all that you do is just waste my dopamine
why do i hate november
i need your answer
you know i'll remember
always and always

like a puppet

tori kelly cover

thank u for listening <3

paper hearts

i'll be alright ft daywatch (shade08)

Mastered by @noraevelyne
lyrics
can u look at me the way i look at you
i know it looks bad but i wanna change for you
(oh) nothing i wouldnt do
just to be up next to you
(oh) i wanna be up next to u

But i cant
and it just hurts
cant say anything to make me give a fuck
you never really cared to think of what i want
im stuck in this place yeah it really, really sucks x2

why cant you talk to me the way i want you to
and you made me a promise but you broke that too
you said it was fake, and it broke into 2
i dont really know what to do

dont dont break all your promises
no i dont care what no one says
(dont go and break your promises, just because of what your friend said)
(it dont make no sense, can you get that through your head)

Nora
vibrant eyes
a promsie with no lies
soft skin and eyes
im horrible but i seem nice

where did i get 
wubdaishdiusha
and i look in her eyes
im getting to look how
how my consoiuness
so dont leave, just put a leave in this

so dont leave before
i pick up my feet from the floor
i wanna see you smile
to make that happen ill go any mile

promises + nora evelyne  (xnull + yametsu)

(prod uguwap x yqinnny)
(janes)
I'll slam my feet through the concrete
These voices alarm me
I try my best, I swear my soul is dissolving
Better luck again
Thought we were more than friends
I guess that this was alll just pretend
x2

(union)
Backed out for a second, now I can't breathe
I swear I lose my mind when you're not next to me
You make it hard to cope when you're
Ten thousand miles away from home
I cannot sleep, man, I just cannot think
That there was someone else better than me
My eyes are blurry, I can barely see
I'll say it now this is how I feel
I don't feel at home
I hate being alone
(Oh-ooh)

(cigs)
I don’t wanna be alone
 I wanna feel at home (at home) well maybe I’m alone in my life
 I wanna make it right but she told better luck next 
time oh whoa whoa oh

Better Luck Again w/ union + cigs

Prod king theta
Cover art inspired by @dthxrgt
additional vocals from bended @tyscn
https://open.spotify.com/album/0O2uDTSRyIWzppqwWOWO8D?si=oThsB04_TCKBNbABzexU1A

All of my friends warned me about you, they say you’re bad news
They told me to choose between them or you, and I just couldn’t choose
I never rlly wanted to give up the memories of you,
But I’ve never been the one to push my luck, and I just can’t go thru
Anytime you need me darling, you can just call and I’ll be on my way
She looked me in my eyes and asked me if I was fallin, but I just can’t explain

If I lie down, would you find me?
I’d spit it out ‘cause you’re all I ever need 

If I lie down, would you find me?
I’d spit it out ‘cause you’re all I ever need 

I know it’s all my fault, lost again
I truly miss all my friends
But I lost em all, I’ll make amends
I just want all of this to end
I just want all of this to end
I just want all of this to end


All of my friends warned me about you, they say you’re bad news
They told me to choose between them or you, and I just couldn’t choose
I never rlly wanted to give up the memories of you,
But I’ve never been the one to push my luck, and I just can’t go thru
Anytime you need me darling, you can just call and I’ll be on my way
I looked her in her eyes and told her, “baby I’m falling” she said,“it’s okay”

If I lie down, would you find me?
I’d spit it out ‘cause you’re all I ever need 

If I lie down, would you find me?
I’d spit it out ‘cause you’re all I ever need

Is it all my fault?
I lost it all
And I paid the price but I don't want to talk about it

Is it all my fault?
I lost it all
And I paid the price but I don't want to talk about it

Recorded April 13th, 2023

like a puppet

andrelv

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