I wrote this in 2017 after over hearing my mom on the phone saying she was leaving my family. I remember feeling a lot of resentment in that moment, flooded with memories of her saying we were so much alike. This is the voice memo I recorded right after finishing the song in 2017, I sound like a fetus and mess up a bit but it felt most honest for this version exist in the world. Hope you find comfort in it if you need it. <3

Never Be (2017 voice memo)

Velcro

- Up Until June -

I don't know why you've morphed into my least favorite song
I put you down on paper, and every time it feels wrong
'cause you become immortal and I become a little less strong

Back in July you and I 
Could barely be in the same room without a fight
And ever since July, I've tried
To make myself the center of my life
But I can't keep on track if you keep coming back

You were becoming your own man
And it made me feel fifteen 
'cause you're so inconsiderate 
It made me stomp my feet, but then
Run right to your arms while 
You ran far away from me

And I've made progress
Since August 
In my romantic comedy of a life
And ever since August,
I don't know if you forgot this,
but I've been living for me all the time
But I can't keep on track if you keep coming back

You keep coming back
You keep coming back

And up until June I still loved you
Without these blemishes and scars that we've both made
I could never hate you,
but its no breakthrough
Everything that we are isn't the same

I've made progress
Since August 
In my romantic comedy of a life
And ever since August,
I don't know if you forgot this,
but I've been living for me all the time
But I can't keep on track if you keep coming back

Back in July you and I 
Could barely be in the same room without a fight
And ever since July, I've tried
To make myself the center of my life
But I can't keep on track if you keep coming back

And up until June I still loved you
Without these blemishes and scars that we've both made
I could never hate you,
but its no breakthrough
Everything that we are isn't the same

And we ran ourselves right off track
And we can't keep can't keep coming back
I'll run right off track if you keep coming back

You keep coming back
You keep coming back
Coming back
Come back.

--
Chloe Gilligan 

Apple Music / iTunes 
https://itun.es/us/2NESfb

Spotify 
https://open.spotify.com/artist/5Sbeq...

Instagram:
gilligansisland24

Twitter:
cgilly24

Youtube:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3YQ6AgD75ZuyLMQ-5G0UwQ

Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/cgilly24/?ref=bookmarks

Up Until June

Link to Guilty Music Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=toLsMKQ9g4g

Guilty -- Lyrics by Chloe Gilligan

You fly me to the Golden Coast
Did you miss your sun?
I say "Well, the flight was longer than I'd hoped"
You joked I should've run
But I know you're scared to fly

And you made reservations to catch up at half past eight but
There's no room for dropping bombs
'Cause we've talked every day
Since the day 
You said I'd "always have a place to stay in L.A."

But I don't mind
If you and I keep on staying up talking all night
But I can't find
The feeling that should make all of this feel right
And your finger tips light up when you 
Reach out say you miss me but 
If I said "me too" I'd feel guilty, I'd feel guilty
Oh, oh, oh

You're caught between "its fine" 
And you "can't do this anymore"
But the tears I cause feel like magic
I push til oceans form
And when it rains it pours 
'Cause you can count the times you've cried 
On the knuckles of one hand
And you'll punch until they bleed when you 
Beg me to stay
Baby I just can't...
You know I can't

But I don't mind
If you and I keep on staying up talking all night
But I can't find
The feeling that should make all of this feel right
And your finger tips light up when you 
Reach out say you miss me but 
If I said "me too" I'd feel guilty, I'd feel guilty
Oh, oh, oh

And I feel you bottle up my light
And crack it open when its dark
And its you who I call to at night
But I never find a spark

But I don't mind
If you and I keep on staying up talking all night

I don't mind
If you and I keep on staying up talking all night
But I can't find
The feeling that should make all of this feel right
And your finger tips light up when you 
Reach out say you miss me
Oh your finger tips light up when you reach out, say you miss me, but 
If I said "me too" I'd feel I'd feel guilty
I feel guilty

My CD

Guilty

Sometimes we stay even when it often feels like we are drowning with someone.  When you love someone, sometimes that drowning gets comfortable. But once you pull yourself out, you can finally breathe again. This is what "The Way We Fight" is to me.  I hope you guys like it! :)

Link to Lyric Video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=INaFE-j4_ig

The Way We Fight:

You put a picket fence between our thoughts
And now I'm thinking of what we were not what we are
Oh, and I know
I have high hopes

Now we're pickin'
Pathetic pointless fights
And now we're sinking
While you're making beats you're up all night now
And I know you have high hopes

I like the way we fight
But I can't stay up all night
I don't love you and I, but
I like the way we fight

Living into every hip-hop lyric 
You have listened to
Now they're real 'cause you believed them
And I know they have high hopes for you in the studio
You learned how to say "sorry" from your heroes
Apologize like Drake and Jay-Z
So I hope
While you get high on blowing smoke

I like the way we fight
But I can't stay up all night
I don't love you and I, but
I like the way we fight

Maybe you're more like your Dad than you thought
'Cause when you say "sorry" all you see is your Mom
And maybe I'm more like your Ex than you think 
'Cause day by day I see you forgetting me
Maybe you're more like your Dad than you thought
'Cause when you say "sorry" all you see is your Mom
And maybe I'm more like your Ex than you think 
'Cause day by day I see you forgetting me

I like the way we fight
But I can't stay up all night
I don't love you and I, but
I like the way we fight

I like the way we fight
But I can't stay up all night
I don't love you and I, but
I like the way we fight

The Way We Fight

The laughing down the hallway 
Echoing it sounds like you 

The burner in the kitchen 
When it clicks it sounds like you 

Sounds like summer on a rainy day 
But we kept the clouds away 
Never getting down with you 

Autumn took the fun away 
But our love was here to stay 
Never gettin down with you 

Hear you in everything 
You are everything 

Marching bands and big crowds
Gets so loud it sounds like you 

The still and steady quiet 
Of 5 am it sounds like you 

Sounds like Fourth of July, Paper Rings
Murder documentaries 
Never gettin down with you 

Lemon droppin take a sip
Carry my bag every trip 
Never gettin down with you

Hear you in everything 
You are everything 

Hear you in everything 
You’re my everything 

written by Chloe Gilligan
produced by Ben Booth

Sounds Like You

Manipulated my night again 
too many shots and I cried again 
Sometimes I wish you were just a friend 
And I’d go back to the night we met again 

If a drink in your hands 
Feels better than me
Then we’ve gotten a bigger problem 
Than you seem to think 
I can’t change the way your brain makes you feel the way you do 
But I gotta change something cause I can’t change you 

Say you can’t feel anything 
That means you hold in everything 
And sometimes when you’re fast asleep 
I pray to God to bring you back who you used to be 

If a drink in your hands 
Feels better than me
Then we’ve gotten a bigger problem 
Than you seem to think 
I can’t change the way your brain makes you feel the way you do 
But I gotta change something cause I can’t change you 

And it’s not like I’m perfect but I’m trying 
And I know you’re trying too 
But if every time I leave you alone
I feel like I’ve gotta go back home 
Then something’s gotta change for you too

If a drink in your hands 
Feels better than me
Then we’ve gotten a bigger problem 
Than you seem to think 
I can’t change the way your brain makes you feel the way you do 
But we gotta change something cause I can’t change you 

Somethings gotta change 
And I hope it’s for me and you too

Change You

Texte et interprétation : Audrey Babin-Alexandre
Musique et mixage : Pierre Grandjean
Autres voix : Sam Proulx et Nataša Obradović

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Audrey Babin-Alexandre

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