Bessarion

best of garden graves (and a few more)

i am an icon with pollution in my eyes
i am subjected to experimental life
my head is filled with all the things you advertise
the common filth, the lie, the mental hell online

the world is easier to give up all the time
no point in hedonism if you are deprived
live on in agony or go ahead and die
oh, happy apathy, i'm so desensitized

mental hell online (common filth)

i'll show you everything you've done
no point in trying to explain yourself
can't help it now
no words can leave your mouth
you'll reap exactly what you sow
it doesn't matter if you understand
the seeds will grow
they'll eat you up alive 

kiss it all goodbye
you'll be dead and in a coffin
you can wish that you knew why
but in the end you'll have forgotten
all these people drawing lines
parallels and intersections (partitions and connections)
crossing bridges between lives
tying strings into the other side

death never asked you for consent
forever is a moment's rest,
upon you now
breathing your own pollution
the blooming flower of your pride
has a weight so insupportable
it has to die
the stem cannot sustain the burden

(i am a man, a match, a burning mass, a billow of a flame
i am a soul a coal a fullness i'm unable to relate
my name is dream, my flesh is grass, and i grow older every day
my name is words, my flesh is dirt, my name is carved into a grave)

parallels and intersections

lyrics:
keep my calling my phone all damn day
dont even listen to what i say
no matter how long or hard i try
we both know this will end witha goodbye  

and i dont wanna know no i dont wanna go

oh look youve gotta new complaint
does it have to do with all my hate
nothing will change no matter how long u wait
cause unlike you im not a saint 

 my mind is going
my blood is flowing
does this mean goodbye?
i dont wanna die

oh yeah start another fight
cause you know that always makes u right
ill put a bullet in my head
pretend the casket is my bed

my mind is going
my blood is flowing
does this mean goodbye?
jesus watch me bleed
jesus dont leave us

goodbye/hate

made as a part of the basement tape compilation, artwork by https://soundcloud.com/fooolz
Lyrics:
Can you really tell me I'm alive?
Are we really running out of time?
you've got yours, do I got mine?
well i dont know
 
baptize my soul in blood and steel
all this crying but i still cant feel 


since when was i evr myself
they said theyre worried abt my health
i think it doesnt really matter 

i might seek but i dont wanna know
the angels calling to me 

and on and on ill never see spill half my blood beyond the trees smoke cigarettes till i cant breath anything to feel free

blood and steel

made as a part of the basement tapes compilation, artwork by https://soundcloud.com/fooolz 
Lyrics: i was lying on floor of my parents basement
better than just on just lyin on the pavement 
i was so low i was underground 
in my head right where i belong

they said i was fucked in the head
cause sometimes i wish i was dead
well doesnt everyone, i dont know
i just wanna drink and i dont wanna go
when i think, nothing comes to mind 
am i dead?  or running outta time?

angels fill me with mercy
jesus dont desert me 

ouououuuuuououuuuouuoo

jesus dont leave us
jesus take mercy
i was running
i was running from the law
(As Sita endured the trials of fire, may our spirits emerge unscathed from the crucible of challenges, and, like Hanuman, let devotion guide us in leaping across the abyss of adversities with courage and devotion. "As Noah built an ark to navigate the floods of change, may we construct vessels of resilience, braving the storms of life with unwavering faith and the wisdom to weather the tides.”)

running out of time

i know you need some time but i don't need some time to realize you're perfect to me
i hope you change your mind cause it would be really convenient since we talk about a lot of stuff
i never felt this way before except for all the times i swore that i fell so in love
i really think it's different now i really like when you're around it makes me happy

i know you're really lonely even though you said the opposite
none of this would matter if you'd only let me hold your hand
i'd kiss you all the time and it would be really romantic
we'd take selfies together and we'd post it all on instagram

lalalalalaa lalalala alallalala

i know that you're not ready for a serious relationship but i think that's really dumb
i'm cooler than your exes and and im smarter and im hotter, yeah i'm really such a special boy
our friends call you a narcissist but i think that they're full of it, you have my total trust
remember that one time i helped you with that thing you're going through, you owe me your affection

i know you're really lonely even though you said the opposite
none of this would matter if you'd only let me hold your hand
i'd kiss you all the time and it would be really romantic
we'd take selfies together and we'd post it all on instagram

ooooooooo ooooooooo ooooooo ooooooo

im going to kill myself if you don't date me

i don't wanna go outside anymore
i don't wanna be a fuckin whore 
i don't know what i wanna be
and i don't know what you mean to me
feels like i've always been 16 
maybe it's just that amphetamine

turn to christ whenever i can
but i know my life is just a sham
when i die bury me
in a garden by a tree
after i die ill be born again 
maybe then ill make some friends 

i dont know just what do
i thought i could bet on loving you
but now my closest one is gone
i guess i sorta lead you on

but i dont wanna wake up this time

idontwnnawakeup!

fistfull of sorrow
i dont know what i wanna be
theyll burn down our castle
and i dont wanna see

with a bundle of sage 
and a pistol to my head
i dont wanna feel this way
id rather just be dead

i told you 
im afriad to die
whatever i knew
left after you cried

theres a little fairy
inside my head
pray to mother mary
my blood wont be shed

it doesnt matter
theres nothing that i wanna do
camelot is shattered
and it all comes back to you

stake my head to a pole
you think im outta control?

slit my writs and cut my hair
all this whining but idrc

writing all these stupid songs
i wish i could right my wrongs
mary wont u follow me
i might know but i dont wanna see

theres a chill down my spine
idk but i think im fine
ive never rlly cared 
im so fuckin unaware

when u call my name
you wont hear a response
my heart is broken
so dont test ur luck

camelot_

intro: A...C#m...A...C#m...Cm...Bm...D...Dm

A........C#m
I am happy
A.......C#m...Cm....Bm
I am happy to be sad
Bm ...........................................................D.............Dm
I've given up on trying to make you understand

A...........C#m
I am sincere
A...........C#m.....Cm.......Bm
I am sincerely full of crap
Bm...........................................................D.................Dm
When the irony ceases to help me cope with that

A......................C#m
All I make is noise
A........................C#m........Cm........Bm
Trying to express my point of view
Bm.........................................................D....................Dm
Empty words reverberate on nothing in this world

A..........................C#m
I speak into the void
A...............C#m........Cm........Bm
Curses to use against my soul
Bm..............................................D.............Dm
Echos to the eschaton forever to be told

A........F#m..D..........Bm
My oh my, why can't I
A.................F#m...D........Bm
change my life, valentine?

(cancer on society
caustic instability
crass insensitivity
product of modernity)

outro: D...Dm.... (A)

im going to kill myself if you don't date me

bessarion