Cover Art Credit: http://vsco.co/rosieshulman

You completely destroy me
You destroyed me like you never knew you could
I'm not over you and I never will be
The thing about love is that simple things like her lips and her eyes break my heart
They're not mine and I don't know who's they'll be
Her hair is therapy to my cold and brittle heart

I used to find safety in her smile
I used to feel warmth in the look on her face
I've been left an empty shell to whither and fade away
I used to think of all the things that we'd be
Now I only think of all the things that we never really were

I used to call you mine but now you just don't know
What am I left to do but stand here in the cold
All I've got left are some photos of you and your voice stuck in my head
Saying how you'd be there always and forever until the very end

You were everything to me, and you always will be
Deep in my heart that aches for the sound of your voice
But no longer will I have the choice

I'm sorry for anything that I've done
For the person I've become that you learned to love but then turned your back like a setting sun

If I hurt you I pray that you forgive me
I mean all the words that I say please believe me

And see me as the person you always knew I was
I've never been perfect not in a single way
And that day that you saved me is when I fell from grace
I only needed you and I pushed everyone else away

So now I'm left alone
To live this life all on my own
And I hate the fact that someone else is holding you close
And how you broke my heart when I needed you the most
I've always been too scared to be properly diagnosed
Because you were my pill but now you're nothing but a ghost

And I still have your pictures and that letter you wrote
Where you said that you loved me and you'd never let me go
And you saved me from myself and that's something I hope you know
But you cut me down so quick and I've never been so low

And my stomach aches with every breath of air I breathe
Because you were the one that gave me everything I need
But now this pain won't subside I just can't believe you chose to leave
You were my reason for living how could you do such a heinous thing

I was like a boat that got carried out to sea
And I trusted in your waves, that you wouldn't harm me
You protected me from the storm and gave me a chance at life
And I love the way you cared and asked if I was alright

But something died, something changed and I sunk to the ocean floor
You no longer wanted to hold me up and I drowned from within my core

And every essence of my being is still just too afraid to fight
Because I'm terrified to keep on living without you by my side

And all the things that people said I guess this whole time they were right
Love can never last this way when the flame burns too bright

But I hope you're happy

I hope you're doing fine

I love you still today

Just like you were still mine

I still love the way you laughed
And the things you said to me
You'll never leave my heart
Nor my memory

I just wish I could understand
Why you had to leave
I can't do this on my own
I need you here with me

But you've turned into a ghost
And you're nowhere to be seen
And I can't hear your voice
I won't see your message on the screen

We won't have a family
We won't have a house
We won't raise our kids
You won't be my spouse

We won't grow old together
Like we always planned
You disappeared forever
And alone here shall I stand

you completely destroy me

Photo Credit: https://vsco.co/sofiavels
Sample Credit: Pale Lungs - Roam

Lyrics:
I still got your pictures on my phone
Wonder why you thought you had to go
Left me all alone and on my own
Felt it coming this whole time I should've known

But why, why'd you have to leave me all alone
You know, how you make me feel when you ain't home
My god, it's killing me inside I hope you know
Been dead in my heart for a while though it hurts won't let it show

No time for farewells and no chances for goodbyes
You disappeared forever and you left me high and dry
How you gonna leave and leave me out here left to die
You fed me to the wolves when I needed you by my side

I don't want to say nothing that's bad about you
I still love you girl I'm still mad about you
There was once a time when I would never doubt you
But people change and now I have to live without you

You could have just said goodbye, you ghosted me moved on with life, anxiety and all this strife, and I wonder all the time if you just found a new guy

I just wanna make you proud
Like I used to when you vowed
To never leave my side when I was down
You let me sink and now I'm boutta drown

I can still see your face I can still hear your voice
And I don't even wanna but I don't have any choice
I try to block it out and listen to the city noise
You kill me from inside and now I'm completely destroyed

But the worst part is I don't know
Where you are or how you are or where'd you go
You didn't say nothing you just let me go
Left me with my thoughts left me all alone

I don't wanna see your face anymore
I don't wanna hear your voice anymore
I don't wanna think about you anymore
I don't hate you I just can't bear it no more

Your hair, your smile, your fingertips
Your face, your voice, your mouth, your lips
Your warmth, your laugh, your legs, your thighs
Your love, your hate, your care, your eyes

proud

ALBUM ARTWORK BY DUKS <3 This guy is sooo insanely talented, please support him!
twitter.com/SirDuksalot
www.instagram.com/sirduksalot

Sample Credit: Mogwai - Every Country's Sun

Sunrise

sometimes things just dont work out,
if you wanted me to stay you should know now,
you can tell me anything that you dont doubt,
Park Jefferson in the air while we roll out

cool breeze in her hair got my heart warm,
orange leaves in the air got me lovelorn,
cold fights on the phone make a big storm,
guess ill leave, wanna stay, got my heart torn

when i wake up my bed too big,
sleep in the hole in the grave i dig,
i walk away like i know you did,
turned my back the same time that you hid

some day when we're both alone and lonely,
some day when i want you back to hold me,
think back on all of the things you told me,
miss you feeling like you were my only

Im sorry i ran away
Im sorry i couldnt stay
Im breaking down every day
I know its better this way

can you feel this pain inside
broke inside got me out of my mind
all these days pass by i cry
wanna go back, do it right this time

i been down im so broken
cant stand my hearts been stolen
the way our lives been woven
just makes me sad im frozen

i tried to sleep away my feelings im still sad
i tried to get all of this weight up off my back
i tried to numb all the emotions that i had
i cried and laid in bed for weeks i still feel bad

Im sorry i ran away
Im sorry i couldnt stay
Im breaking down every day
I know its better this way

runaway (prod adjustisac)

A single from the upcoming EP 'Syrup Tape'

when i cant high i just fall asleep
been in the same bed now for 13 weeks
and i dont really care if you think of me
but thats the fuckin lie that i always speak

i been rollin up these blunts and smokin plenty of weed
i been abusin all this syrup cuz i cant get no sleep
and i been searchin for some pills to kill the devil in me
and maybe if im lucky find me dead in the street

i always run away everytime you get close
you try to help me out i know you do the most
but maybe i should leave maybe ill be a ghost, i know its better for your health i never been diagnosed

i sit and pay attention all the shit that you do
say you got some big dreams so go make it come tru
i know that you dont need me cuz you makin it through
i wish that you would hate me so you get up and move, on

you say that it can work but i know that it wont
you say you wanna spend your time just holding me close
you say you want me there so i share in your growth, but the truth is that im broken i gave up long ago

i know this shit so hard but there aint no other way
thats just what happens when you fall in love in a day
i wish that i could help you but dont know what to say
i tried to save myself but then got lost in the haze

cuz you know im a lost cause
im gettin money but im too flawed
shit too real so i gotta pause
i was better now i have withdraws, know we be good and we gon be alright
we just sip a lil syrup mix it up with the sprite
i just hate myself so much i cant take my own advice
so i turn into a cliche im the same as those guys

when i cant high i just fall asleep
been in the same bed now for 13 weeks
and i dont really care if you think of me
but thats the fuckin lie that i always speak

i been rollin up these blunts and smokin plenty of weed
i been abusin all this syrup cuz i cant get no sleep
and i been searchin for some pills to kill the devil in me
and maybe if im lucky find me dead in the street

lost

Lyrics:
tonight tonight, i been livin too high, got me trapped inside my mind
tonight tonight, i been livin too high, got a little bit of syrup and i do it out of spite

i feel it runnin throughout my head tonight
feel it in my chest feelin dead tonight
i still cant eat i cant sleep tonight
i aint close my eyes in like twenty-two nights

always losing sleep cuz they say im too nice
i know the night time well im friends with the moonlight
come to me with questions ill give you some advice
but i cant help myself when im dependent on a vice

always scared of thoughts inside my head ya
always scared of everything been said ya
always wonder where im being lead ya
always wake up feeling deep in dread ya

never wanna see you down and sad no no
never been real happy so im high no no
never thought i ever be alright no no
always feel im broken deep inside no no

i feel it runnin throughout my head tonight
feel it in my chest feelin dead tonight
i still cant eat i cant sleep tonight
i aint close my eyes in like twenty-two nights

always losing sleep cuz they say im too nice
i know the night time well im friends with the moonlight
come to me with questions ill give you some advice
but i cant help myself when im dependent on a vice

twonight (prod AdjustIsac)

Lyrics:
you said that you were coolin in your new ripped jeans
you said you always having scary dreams
i feel alone thinking on days like these
i lost myself in everyone but me

i take a bottle off the shelf ya
i just dont know if you can help ya
i help everyone but myself ya
im gettin high all by myself ya

im hoping that ill be just fine
cuz i dont really wanna die
i guess thats progress at least in my eyes
im tryna live but it gets hard sometimes

im overthinking while im floating and im gettin high yeah
i just wish that i could know how i can make it by yeah
cuz now im low even when i should be up in the sky yeah
i never got my wings so i still dont know how to fly yeah

im in my bed for another night yeah
im feelin dead when the sun dont shine yeah
i been mislead yeah know im right yeah
im gettin bread while im on the flight yeah
i know that money aint gon make it right yeah
im praying everything'll be alright yeah

you said that you were coolin in your new ripped jeans
you said you always having scary dreams
i feel alone thinking on days like these
i lost myself in everyone but me

newrippedjeans (prod AdjustIsac)

Lyrics:
i been, i been, i been countin
i been, i been, i been rollin dope
i been, i been, i been, faded
i been burnin in these sheets i got a flu so cold

i been countin on my woes
i been down cuz im so low
gettin money i still grow
gettin faded all alone
say my heart dont got no home
like a nomad it gon roam
weigh me down just like a stone
watch me drown so i dont go

been stay awake each and every night
i cant sleep get you off my mind
hate the way that i made you cry
up all night wonder if ill die

i been dead so i cant catch sleep
been mislead so i cant catch Z's
cold late nights on ones just like these, i been workin hard tryna find some peace

get too bored when i count them sheep
been restless in between my sheets
want you here in my bed with me
been too cold just to do the least

in my room i be in the cold
dont give fuck bout what i been told
hope i die before i get old
givin up but i cant let go

hope you know that everything gon be alright, ya
hope you listen to my words now every night, ya
know youre sad like me but it gon be just fine, ya
i know youll make it if i dont get out alive, ya

my vision blurry and feel like im gonna drop, ya
im in a hurry but my heart is bouta stop, ya
if i dont wake up i dont think that its a problem
just take me home where i belong im not your problem

it gon aint happen we'll be fine, ya
i feel your heart connect with mine, ya
i finally finish what i write, ya
this is life, you gon be just fine, you gon be alright, ya

youll be alright ya
youll be just fine ya
youll feel the light ya
youll be alright ya

moon

Prod @splashgvng
Lyrics:
I don't know what you want from me
I wish that you could leave me be
I don't know what you want from me, so I'll just carry on and try to find some peace and clarity

We aren't alright in a bad mood
Get sad we fight then we fall through
Come back we know it's the whole truth
When we hear them words like I love you

I wish that it was easy and I know its hard
I wake up every day and you're still in my heart
You're still in my dreams even though we're far apart
The distance is so hard it got me in the dark

We ain't alright and I'm feelin stuck
Try to climb out I fall back in the mud
Ima do me I don't need your luck
Grind all night till the sun come up

we arent alright (prod splashgvng)

Lyrics:
i had too many things to say
i write the same shit every day
im scared while i be on my way
too anxious to know that im gonna be okay

cuz you know im a bad dream
i get lost i dont 'member me
then you call on a memory
but you know it aint meant to be

i just cant breathe you already know
panic inside i pick up my phone
try to type a message cuz im never alone
i dont want them hearing what goes on in my dome

on repeat on the daily now
tryna stay sane but im crazy now
yeah i wish that i was faded now
so i dont have to think of how i hate it now

its late at night and i can not sleep
trapped inside this anxiety
been distressed just to say the least
i still aint know the fuck wrong with me

i just gotta take a breathe and calm down
need sedation and i need it all now
i been clean the plug im bouta call now
this so fucking hard im bouta fall now

i had to many things to say
i write the same shit every day
im scared while i be on my way
too anxious to know that im gonna be okay

cuz you know im a bad dream
i get lost i dont 'member me
then you call on a memory
but you know it aint meant to be

memory (prod vader)

zombie

explicit

One Night Pt 2

Lyrics:
im a waste, gotta taste of my based brain
feeling far, from my days, screaming gang gang
its complex, when i flex, on my mainstay
where im from, where the sun, been displaced ay

used a blade, couldnt say, but it shows up
on my skin, go away, you dont know us
not insane, not okay, boutta throw up
all these pills, so instead, guess ill roll up

im just sittin here, piling money in the benz
i aint share with no one cuz i aint got any friends
turn my feels to money then im feeling what i spend
wonder if thats all to life im dying in the end
x2

call me an insomniac im staying up all night
cant get any sleep with all these thoughts up in my mind
like thinking bout what happens when we close our eyes and die
does anything feel real or am i living a whole lie

depersonalize in my mind im lost
feeling like a dream at a nightmare cost
dont know what ive seen but my mind exhaust
hallucinate the real and my eyes stay glossed

life is very scary now, feeling very wary now
wanna take revenge on those who hurt me like im carrie now
float just like a fairy now, feeling very merry now
shoutout all the substance in my veins im gettin faded now

then i wake up down low, stay in bed im out bro
puff and watch the cloud go, now im breathing shallow
but its all anxiety, creeping up inside of me
saying that im nothing why you always gotta lie to me

im just sittin here, piling money in the benz
i aint share with no one cuz i aint got any friends
turn my feels to money then im feeling what i spend
wonder if thats all to life im dying in the end
x2

sedative

Can I Keep U

Can I Keep U?

Lyrics:
(honeyberryxfin)
bitch im kerwin frost with my wrist watch it flip, huh
e86 initial D with the drift, huh
(livinginhiraeth)
spent ten baaaands on this bitch
(julianmissling)
yeh shawdy by my side take her out for a trip


(__.fuckboi._)
i used to be depressed about a bitch
but now im smokin hella loud im gettin lit,
(pregnantjuno)
if you feelin kinda down then i guess you get my gist,
yeah you takin all these drugs so you boutta be missed-

(hkfiftyone)
i be stay obsessed, im a scorpio
aint grindin for the check, just the glory tho
(nmwell)
kinda keep it secret like a glory hole
pull up with the homies and i smoke a bowl

(zack_langley)
i do it for the fans, no im not alone
yall can put that shit up on my gravestone
(trashtrapprincess)
dope flow make these bitches wanna go, huh
stacks so thick but i really want some mo, huh

(theee.warriorrr)
you know my shit legit and i be countin bricks, huh
you know i got so much i hand em out like gifts, huh
(brian_tsofficial)
diamonds in my mouth I'm talkin with a lisp, huh
(third_eye_deus_vult)
your girly like my drip and you be lookin pissed, huh

(_blade.sharp_)
Say that I be nothing and you may insist
(vibeydev)
Get told that I'm hated I ain't never quit
(domsoepic)
My shit be so fire call it suuunkissed
(lucasschaecher)
Countin up the money as I roooll a spliff

(HKFiftyOne)
Know I got this shawty call her kitty tho
Chillin in the Uber through the city tho
Pourin up them shots we gettin litty tho
When we get inside show me them titties tho

Pull up to the crib when we stay in the trap tho
Keep it on the low while we sneak out the back door
Askin where we are everybody need a map tho
We fuckin in the Benz while she grindin on my lap tho

I'm too wavy like the Eightys, I get money it dont phase me, dont chase money itll chase me
Ya
Got dis baddie prolly lay me, if she want it prolly pay me, give it to her if she lazy
Ya

Shut this shit down like a pad lock
Gettin too lit like a flash mob
I be spittin bars like a mad dog
Call me Breath Of Fire like I'm Capcom

Fanmade

Rockout

Pray For Me I'm Busy

prayformeimbusy

Lyrics:
i need someone to cut me down, when im high feelin good while im off in the clouds, cause i know
i been living a lie so far and i know it dont change the way things really are

got a summer hoodie on, cause im hiding my scars
shawty say she wanna see em, wanna know who you are
yeah but you dont wanna know, just wanna hear my guitar
say she wanna hear my voice, while we fuck in her car

im on the fence boutta end it all
im too alone and i drown in the dark
im just a ghost watch me fade away
i don't exist unless you tell me that ill be okay
x2

ill rest in peace when i get off the phone
ill rest in peace when you leave me alone
ill rest in peace when i pay off that loan, or maybe ill just fuckin die and leave it all for my soul

ill rest in peace cause i know that you happy
ill rest in peace shoutout all of my family
i know i said, please dont get me a grave, i wish i saw my funeral i know it musta been great

i ain got no friends (i ain got no friends)
i just got these meds (i jus got these meds)
i only love my bed (only love my bed)
like im drake but im worse im finna go on a bend

cause im bleeding from my wrist and people think im absurd
if they hear my thoughts i know they hear shit they never heard

im on the fence boutta end it all
im too alone and i drown in the dark
im just a ghost watch me fade away
i don't exist unless you tell me that ill be okay
x2

ill rest in peace cause i know that you happy
ill rest in peace shoutout all of my family
i know i said, please dont get me a grave, i wish i saw my funeral i know it musta been great

Summer Hoodie

summerhoodie

Lyrics:

she said she wanna hear my voice, so I'm going a capella
we could rockout at the show, you could take me to Coachella
all this money coming in it dont mean nothin but its hella
every time i put in work it's like I need a new umbrella

-its boutta raindown, you could make a bet that we all eating
i dont play now, know i got ambitions past the ceiling
every day now, live outside my body say I'm dreaming
what you say now, pack up all your bags and say I'm leaving

I be chillin with your ghost like im legion
there ain't nothin change at all throughout the seasons
i could stay up late and kick it with my demons
i could fall asleep right now without a reason

I could get you on the bed, shawty you heard what I said
But you wont stay till the morning cause I'm busy getting bread
So I guess I'll stay alone I'm like a zombie half dead
I could float and I could sink and I could run you through my head

Hk

CalebFisher