thinking about taking a drive and prob taking a life

he was good to me and I went and I soiled his love

*sample is sprawl by bedlocked*
</3

but i wonder if you want her
in the way i wish you would need me
we were right there, you were right there
if you want me, i'll be right here
like concrete
every morning
when she calls, and you pace
saying baby, don't wait up late
we're concrete

ethel cain - xxxxxxxxxx

Selby Wall - ethel cain

wrestling in dirt pits - ethel cain

Ethel Cain - Football

First you've got to Do It For Dale
Raise hell, praise Dale
Love is a nightmare and all that you’ve got
Still getting lost in a bare parking lot
And the vertigo’s fun til' you
Want it to stop praying this is the end when
You know it’s not
I could be good but it wouldn’t matter
There’s no silver line on a fucking disaster
I hope that you’re happy, glad you can forget
While I'm spending my nights reliving it
Been scared of the dark for all of my life
I’m digging my grave by all of the lights
I’m always afraid but never to die
But not just yet so I’ll be
Twirling around my room again
Spraying blood like the food court fountain
Forgive mе, my trespasses
Holding me down through a
Holе in the mattress
You think you’re someone else
That it only hurts when it hurts yourself
Americanized, Jesus Christ born to lie
So you lie and you lie and you lie and
You need easy, you want weak
When you were hungry, I was soft and pink
I bleed easy, I go weak
You look hungry then back to me
If I fall, I fall hard
Onto you and then all apart
But when the room went dark and I needed you
Where were you?
Twirling around my room again
Spraying blood like the food court fountain
Forgive me, my trespasses
Holding me down through a
Hole in the mattress
You think you’re someone else
That it only hurts when it hurts yourself
Americanized, Jesus Christ born to lie
So you lie and you lie and you lie and

Earnhardt - Ethel Cain

I've been sleeping in the dead body
Of a dead deer out by I-40
I dragged it there as a bed
And consummated my love
In a purple stitch
Like a scratched out itch
I am ugly, I fear
I believe what I hear
And now the push has come to shove
I wanna waste myself
And go take a drive
Take too sharp a corner
And probably take a life
In the end of it all
When you can hardly move
And they say you’ve still got the world to go on
Stay strong
It’s a long, unfortunate while till curtain call, call
I’ve been poking at the dead body
Of a man that I once loved in my garden
He was good to me and I went and I soiled his love
I will not see heaven
Surrendered to the fauna
Am I a bad person
For not knowing what I wanted
I couldn’t face myself
So I avert my eyes
Take two shots in warning
And then take the dive
And I dive
Into the end of it all
When you can hardly move
And they say you’ve still got the world to go on
Stay strong
It’s a long, unfortunate while till curtain call, call
So I call
Dreading the one
That one good morning
Will destroy me
When you’re gone, gone
We’ve been young
Immortal, even
But now we turn and wait for kingdom come
You can leave the windows open
Here in our forever home
Bite down on your shoulder
And if you bleed, then I’ll know

Ethel Cain ~ A long, unfortunate while

half-cocked ‘cause he’s not a big boy….
& I don’t wanna know that half of him

Demo by hayden anhedonia/ethel cain

half-cocked - ethel cain

one of her best that’s for sure

Sunday morning and I’m wasted
Had too much to drink again
Preacher’s saying God will save me
If God is real, He’s a fucking bitch

Tell my baby that I love her
But, right now, mama’s gotta go
I didn’t ask to be this crazy
But since we’re here, I’ll give them a show

Always run from the best of them
But I’ll fall for a piece of shit
Half-cocked ’cause he’s not a big boy
And I don’t wanna know that half of him

If you try to hurt me, I won’t stop you
But there’s something you should know
It’s that my daddy’s fucking crazy
And always ready to blow

The first boy I ever loved
Was a brother I never had
I thought, with him, maybe I’d make it
Maybe it’d be half as bad

Spеnt my nights under the covers
Just wishing hе was there
Draw his portrait in my diary
Just to hold when I got scared

Now I’m fucked up and I’m nasty
But they say I make it look good
I don’t do what my mama told me
I just do what my mama would

I don’t starve ’cause I hate my body
I just starve ’cause I’m fucking broke
And on my mama, I hate this country
America is a fucking joke

What’s gonna scare me when I’ve seen it all?
Been too sick to walk, so I had to crawl
When you leave, turn off the light
I leave my door open at night
To be strung out and still be stone cold
To reach the end, but never close to old
I don’t feel good, but I don’t wanna cry
If I can’t live, can I just fucking die?

Ethel Cain ~ A long, unfortunate while

canadiandogteeth

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