a minion line made me laugh way harder than I should've

My Rap Battles

LYRICS

SpinDashPro:
What you're about to see will be total destruction! 
Tails, not now, I'm trying to deliver an introduction 
What, against the guy from 2010
Who only serves as a footnote for nerds who browse on the web? Yeah!
Your mic’s the only peak you reached, your sound’s soundin’ stressed!
Leave it to the 14 year old to go and spout some nonsense
You're already used to throwing, dude, your house is a mess
Aged about 3 years and then went down with your trend! 
My content will forever remain iconic
Your content’s TedTalking why people hate Sonic
And who’s the choice of guy on your back that you’ve chosen?
I thought we already took down SuperMarioLogan

Sammyclassicsonicfan:
I’ve had it up to here with your fricking spitting!
‘Least all my fans didn’t think I’m fricking missing!
It’s funny how my content’s the one you’re fricking dissing
‘Cause yours devolved to Sonic fan-frick-tion!
You attack like you're so fricking harmful
But your rhyming sounds like you're tripping marbles!
And I’m tired of having to deal with the trolls and haters
My shots frick you up like “IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZER”
Paused production and the fans grew older
You run a track as well as a Krazy Koster
Fricking pull in Knuckles and you’re still punching out 
So make like all your old videos and cut it ou-

SpinDashPro:
Raps flunking like the 2DS, but I guess two really suits too
Must be drinking disappearing ink, I can see right through you
But hey, it’s bold of you to embrace what you used to be, it’s cool to see
Then you wouldn’t have changed much if you quit YouTube!

Sammyclassicsonicfan:
Me quitting YouTube? You’re one to talk
You fricking shooed off of the platform and dropped
You’re not good with comebacks, just look at your growth, man!
I’d switch the channel to a different cooking program

CREDITS 

GamingPlush64 As Sonic
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtWX7jJ5lodM_poQuXMTqjQ
Shimario As Tails
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsFyrvAhPhiEvJ1yL_Ux8MQ
Fightmarker as sammyclassicsonicfan
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UClNJgoh_a9oYoLenAR0RzGg

Written by Rabi and GamingPlush64
Mixed and mastered by GamingPlush64
Beat by Kustom
Thumbnail by Rabi
Art by Nooby
https://soundcloud.com/user-465943028

SpinDashPro vs. Sammyclassicsonicfan - Rap Battle

it's my birthday woooooooo

Azia as Aya Drevis (Mad Father)
Light as Kazuya Mishima (Tekken)
Written by Special Inquisitor Rayyan
Additional writing help by JK03 and E Man
Mixed by Light
Art by LimJJ & Xoniq
Beat by Trunxks 

Aya (0:13):
Father told me of a warrior, a once fierce-spirited youth
Who used to train with Jinpachi free from corrupt corporations 
He was raised then with compassion by a mother that her love abused 
Now he keeps his traumas locked away like a corpse in a basement!
Face it, you're a broken shell from all the scars you accumulated in the past
It’s Mad, how you’re pulling off all these strings on your son - no wonder you can’t be attached!
(Uh) You're cursed with a Rage Drive; all the hate, strife that you built up will not phase mine
For your dated franchise, spewing out the same plot ‘bout a bunch of lame guys always vying to take lives
Your fame cannot take flight, even sprouting wings
When it comes to frontrunners, they're crowning Jin (Ooh!)
Bad blood runs deep in the veins of your kin
Man, Ogre’s holy water could not cleanse your sins
Don’t even need a Mini Chainsaw for me to be offing this
Been dropping hits since 2012, you were just dropped off a cliff!

Kazuya (0:52):
A fight is about who is left standing, nothing else... 
But you best run away like you always do before this devil brings hell 
Beat me? I'll just come back like a Phoenix if you give me the drop 
You’re a bigger nuisance than Paul, BUT I WON’T LET THIS END IN A DRAW!
(AAAAARGH!) DON’T DARE TRY TO ACT LIKE YOU’RE PASSIVE 
(ARGH!) WHEN YOU SMITE CATS FOR SATISFACTION! 
(ARGH!) YOU WENT AND BURNED DOWN YOUR WHOLE MANSION
(ARGH!) BUT COULDN’T PACK FLAMES IN YOUR RAPPING!
(ARGH!) I SHOULD’VE BEEN GIVEN A CHALLENGE
(ARGH!) NOT A BLAND, PSYCHOPATHIC DISTRACTION! 
I LET MY FATHER DESCEND INTO A PIT
YOURS MADE YOU TAKE A DESCENT INTO MADNESS!
(ARGH!) Step to the Iron Fist? Don't try it, bitch!
Daddy made you a doll ‘cause you're fucking lifeless!
I'll come for your throat, leave you choking on your lines
But no pain could be true retribution for your crimes
Inducing ill patients to visit your clinic
So you can just kill ‘em and finish your twisted
endeavours to fulfill your promise to him?
Your victims aren't the only ones that are sick!

Aya (1:31):
I let my father do his work, but I just can't forgive your experiments 
Putting boxing gloves on dinosaurs, you call THAT the peak of science?

Kazuya (1:38)
Dealt with Dio, but I’ll be the one leaving you steamrollered
So go tell my son that on a track, “Dein Vater Mörder” (HA!)

Aya (1:45):
Mother told me that I shouldn't ever try to tell lies:
Her perfume couldn't even make your sweaty players smell nice!
Conditioned to be dauntless but you won't be when I fight you
If you wish to see the face of fear, look behind you…
You got a girl pregnant then left her rejected
Effective in violence? Only when it’s domestic!
Neglected since birth, man your torment is endless
No wonder you snapped worse than your mother’s neck did! (hehehe…)
Being strapped to a rocket’s the only time you'll take off 
What a tragic fate - the one person you loved wanted this total waste of space offed!

Kazuya (2:10):
Your own maid left you slain so she can stay as Alfred’s mistress
I joined the ranks of Smash, you can’t even lift your mother’s Spirits!
Shattered your humanity and morals when your father died
Now I'll make like Monika and DRAG YOU TO THE AFTERLIFE!
(evil laughter)

Aya Drevis vs Kazuya Mishima. SIR Rap Battles (ft. Azia & Light)

Vinny as Leafy
Quizz as Jimmy
Written by Pixel Chris
Mixed by Rayyan
Beat by InsaneBeatz

LEAFYISHERE:
What’s up guys, today I’m battling this guy, JimmyHere
But I’m not playing your games of laugh and lose, so lemme make it clear
You bursting into laughter shouldn’t be how this bout ends
But with the way you hold it back, you’re practically Jimmy Fallon
You got a pedo stache and a beanie hat
And a couch for the cast for repeating laughs
Think you’ll beat me? Cap. You just repeat gags
Such a bitch in fact, you’re a Doogal looking ass

JIMMY HERE:
MODS! Who let this guy get submitted to the stream?
I’m here for good content, not Mr No Chin McGee
If you wanna clap back Jimmy, that acting’s psychopathic
You target children, but that’s your main demographic 
You cyber bully, you think you break new grounds?
Your “roasts” boils down to “You should Kill Yourself… NOW”
I’m just built different, this fight’s just not fair
Because I making you quiver like: JIMMY HERE JUMPSCARE 

LEAFYISHERE:
Damn, I knew those lines were gonna be shitty
But holy shit, I can’t tell what the fuck you were thinking
Like your photos in the mirror, this’ll be a piece of cake
Mentioning jumpscares but I literally make you “quake”
The only W you ever got was in the second grade
While for commentary YouTubers, I literally set the stage
You’ll take a nosedive when I smoke you like a cigarette 
Just letting videos play and they call me Daily Dose of Internet?
You’re falling harder than 5’7 dudes getting out of bed
Motherfuckers IQ tells me he was dropped on his head
You wanna not laugh, I too want you to say less
Because your lines are more forced than the gag about the maid dress
I can destroy cringe channels and end careers in seconds
You watch unfunny videos, and oh, I ought to mention
He’s gotta bait with money for the submissions channels being used
So hurry your bars up, bitch, I wanna bleach my eyes from seeing you

JIMMY HERE:
While you put people down, I keep YouTube splendid
Call me the Filmora logo, cause I’m about to end this
Going through your videos, what I can finally conclude
Is that you’re just mid like It’s Wednesday My Dudes! (AAAAAA)
Your channel was taken down but now I’m leaving you retired 
Cause you have no game and Leaf a lot to be desired 
My lines are fresh like a mint: Ayo, What the dog doin?
Cause I keep the audience excited: Ayo, What the pog doin?
In this face off between Here to Here
I’m simply just not here to hear
You make fun of kids from peer to peer
But when I roast you, you appear to fear
Doesn’t take much for me to leave leafy as a corpse
Thinking you’re winning? You must be trippin like Gorp
Time to coom to your senses, I put on the better show
It’s hard not to laugh at such a laughable foe (Hahahahahahaha)

JimmyHere vs LeafyIsHere Early Audio

Lyrics/Beat/Trivia: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dYZJHhVplz3Yq5cxOmQgxd7Rsmk5cOQSqnL5fwxdvlc/edit
JesseBoxVO as Hornet
MetaMachine as Luigi
Written by MetaMachine and Legengo
Beat by Anywaywell
Mixed by Special Inquisitor Rayyan
Thumbnail by JK03
Hint for next battle: "In space, no one can hear you murder." (featuring GamingPlush64 and Special Inquisitor Rayyan)

Luigi vs. Hornet

Special Inquisitor Rayyan as Stampy

RaccoonBro as Garfield

Written by Quizzique
Additional Writing Help: Ethan, Rayyan

Mixed by Special Inquisitor Rayyan

Beat produced by J BRING BEATS

Thumbnail Art by GnomeYT

Thumbnail by Quizzique

Lyrics:
Stampy
Hello, this is Stampy, and welcome to a let’s play vid
Today we’re against the scrap pages of Jim Davis
Your schtick is being lazy? That’s mundane
Not feeling up to battling? Must be a case of Mondays!

Your owner’s Jon, but your plot points Aren’t-Buckled
Seems your continuity has Garfield Kart-trouble
Since 2012, I’ve been on that Minecraft star hustle
Born in ‘76, yet you’ve fallen out into a Paws struggle

From Murray to Pratt, you’ve an array of casts
But with your production rights, away they’ve been passed
Sony, Fox and Paramount? You’re the bastard of newspapers
Jim’s flare amounts to having mastered reduced labor

You’re the comic Guinness backs? I must need a break
Eat you in minutes on this track like you were a piece of cake
There are limits that I lack, fighting googlies I attack
Sic my dogs onto your back, since I know they make you quake

Garfield

Yawn About time you wrapped up your verse
Ehh, I’ve heard worse, although I thought you didn’t curse?
Try to keep viewers immersed, but all your content is rehearsed
Wanna leave a mark on YouTube? Try to Hit the Target first

You run a Not-So-Lovely World with all the helpers you’ve locked out
Filled with even more crap than your dog house
Speaking of dogs, you’ve got too many to handle
Left some more dead than a Minecrafter’s channel

You used to be a hit, anyone can attest
Then you took a harder hit than you did with Wonder Quest
Get me a coffee so I can leave this kid maimed
You’ve got me going Ballistic: call that a Squid Game

Now I’m taking names like we’re in the Love Garden
Lost memories are the only thing that heart’s guardin’
I’ve got one last thing that I need to tell you, dude
I bet Lee only left so he could hand the L to you

Stampy
Don’t you dare threaten my dogs, or else when the dust settles
You’ll be in the ground like you were some love love petals!
Barnaby’s my best friend, he fills me with such joy
Jon’s dog loves you, seems he’s just an Odie to Destroy

Garfield
Jeez, that writing was even worse than your book’s, chum
You’re looking Fidgety ‘cause that’s where you took your looks from
Your comedy’s more childish than all of Minecraft’s players
I like my comics like I like my lasagna: with layers!

Stampylongnose Vs Garfield | QUIZZICAL QUARRELS #2 (feat. Special Inquisitor Rayyan & RaccoonBro)

you'll never guess who made this battle.
SPM1000 as Akinator
Toni Rigatoni as AI Dungeon
Beat produced by Dave James (Audio Network)
Written by Trakked and King Mewtwo
Additional help by King Mewtwo
Mixed by Special Inquisitor Rayyan
Thumbnail by Trakked
Art by Grenade

Battle:
Akinator:
I am the renowned, profound rapper Akinator
If you want to battle a round, then you can ask me later
I’m a bit busy with thousands of people playing games,
While no matter the update, your lame bot just stays the same
You used to be a tool and game that people could have fun with
And then you turned your fanbase to an AI Sex Dungeon!
It’s disgusting, and I don’t care very much for silly antics
I suggest you wish for some actual talent to rap, kid

AI Dungeon:
It’s kind of odd that this broken bot chose the prompt to fight
I suppose you’re used to your legacy being stomped on, right?
You’re spitting sick, but it’s terrible, malarian,
Your desert can’t compare within the kingdom of Larion (OHH)
My world is infinite, surpassing expectations
Your world is limited, can't use imagination
You think you're big and shit, but you just need to face it
Maybe think outside the lamp you're trapped in, be creative
Claim you’re reading minds with your questions, it’s just pathetic
Takes hours to get a character you say you’d know in seconds
I ain’t coming back for seconds, bitch, I don’t got the time
Your rhymes are so off you’re prolly snorting your lines

Akinator:
Tough talk. You think my AI’s absurd?
At least my model doesn’t make you pay for every word
Paywalls and paywalls, you think they would buy it?
You're giving people one more reason to be a pirate
I'm well-known for my beyond infinite database
But I couldn't name a single person in your player base
I may be stumped, but I'm not yet done playing you
And there's no coming back from all of your accusations, too

AI Dungeon:
I'd like you to imagine how your website would be
If you didn't brand yourself "20 Questions but free!"
You say that you’re a psychic, but if that’s really true
Then how did you not predict that you’d be the one to lose? (ooh)

Akinator vs AI Dungeon - Rap Cypher #28

Azia as Lofi Girl 
RaccoonBroVA as Kousei Arima
Written by Special Inquisitor Rayyan
Mixed by Light
Beat by Epistra
Cover art by M!CAH
Art in Cover Art by Charles Draws

Lofi Girl (0:13)
Uh, could you quiet down please? I'm trying to revise
At least so I can put my mind to writing lines to fight this guy
I'd turn my headphones up a little to drown out your music
But it's useless when you'd do it to yourself, all 'cause your trauma's ruthless! 
(Hit it)
You really just don't know when to quit it
With living in the past like a haunted spirit
As a child, your skill built you a positive image
But you tore it apart in your music exhibit
It took a dying girl to push your limits
But you didn't wanna pay her visit
When she fought for her life with her failing condition
Just 'cause you were jealous of her friend, what a dimwit
My pen game’s divine, man, check my assignments 
A's all around, you fall flat in the C (sea) that you're trapped in
Your whole life, you've come across violence/violins
Both from the love and the mom which you're lacking 
Face the facts, kid, your existence is tragic, you get beaten up everywhere you go  
And gave your fans a sour taste in their mouths, like you just played them one of your notes

Kousei (0:54):
I often feel trapped, yes, but you're no exception 
Forced to listen to the same songs on repeat 24/7
I can sense the torment in you, your soul’s gradually decaying
Even I don't suffer that much from the music I've been playing (Uh)
You're counterproductive, waving a pen back and forth will not get you the grades that you strive for
None of the tests you've prepared and revised for could compare to all the demons that I've fought
Sleep, you're deprived of, while I am simply unrivaled if we talk musical style
The pianist idol, you just sit idle slaving away with your notes in a cycle
Took over ChilledCow’s channel but you ain't got any beef
You're telling me this Miyazaki reject is my enemy?
Quit selling me your vinyls with recycled compositions
Jade, don't mess with me - in song I'm known to crush my opposition! (Ohhh!)

Lofi Girl (1:36):
I'm taking notes, you can't hear ‘em; to Ryota, you're an interference 
Between him and the girl that you're missing, lied to up until her disappearance 
Feared you couldn't play like you once did; fell from the pedestal that people put you on
No wonder you kept beating yourself up with such an abusive mom 
Don't you get it, Kousei? It's your fate 
Everyone that you love’s being taken away
Couldn't find time with Tsubaki to play
‘Cause you were too busy getting slapped in the face (Ay!)
I can see why you and Kaori match
You're the brains to her brawn ‘cause a brain’s what she lacks
Nothing measures up to the scale of your strife;
All the joy that you’ve felt were short-lived like her life

Kousei (2:02):
I've been taught by the best to not do my worst
And I've caught the attention of all to my work
Jade, you've fought to impress them and leave them immersed
But you brought only dread like you sold them your merch
And I ought to address the barren way that you look
I'd bring more emotion to a keyboard than you could
Face it, you will never top me in fights
When I redesign that face like a copyright strike 
I’ve been moving people with my music since I was a kid
You’re stuck in the same spot for schoolwork, hoping you don’t fail at it
No family in sight to shed any shred of remorse
Just a Whisper to our Hearts, and it's time I finally silenced yours (Shhhh)

Lofi Girl vs Kousei Arima. SIR Rap Battles Season 2 (ft. Azia & RaccoonBroVA)

K.C as Luzy Wilde
Azia as Yor Forger
JesseBox as Anya Forger
ZodiacKiaran & Freshy Kanal as Minions
swizkii as Gru
Written by ZodiacKiaran and SIR Rap Battles
Beat produced by Ear2ThaBeat and ZodiacKiaran
Mixed & Mastered by Freshy Kanal

 Lucy Wilde: 

Agent Lucy Wilde on the track, setting thorns ablaze
Lipstick tase Twilight’s fake date ‘til she’s in a daze
Oooh! You’re a trained assassin? NEAT , you must cause some damage
But tell me, can you kill the beat, like your husband can kill your marriage?
Got my blue trench coat and my moose tranq set, love
Leave you on the floor like Damian Desmond
AVL’s ace agent ain’t vexed but perplexed by your SSS bro’s sis complex 
Living out a selfish lie, your relationships aren't even real, man
Cheesier than my daughter’s dates, yet STILL Yor couldn’t forge her a real man

Yor Forger: (0:40)

Hold on I’m confused, my assignment said kill Gru’s minions
Oh wait I get it now, I’m here to off Gru’s minion! 
Girl you’re quite eccentric, my daughter would love you
Except you’re a chicken kicking nitwit, I’m a thug busting vixen
While I’m protecting my daughter from danger, before the dinner is done
You constantly disappoint yours, you fail and lack discipline 
Try to diss or pin down the Forgers or Briars shall leave your status dire
But this ain’t new to you Lucy, you have already been fired 
2022’s top manga and waifu, with a fanbase to boot
Yours consists of “Two tickets to Rise of Gru” suits
Lacking substance in your films as your company keeps getting greedier 
Selling out with fart guns and butt jokes? You're the biggest laughing stock in media!
If my daughter could read your mind I would know what she’s thinking
She’d say-

Anya:

Mama! This orange lady’s rapping is stinking!

Yor Forger:

When this rose draws her thorns, we’ll find who’s Despicable, me too
Now I’ll slash you up, you’ll turn to Despicable meat too

Lucy Wilde: 
Those disses and quips missed, this dimwit should cut it
Such a misfit, you can’t even kiss with your own fake husband!
So incompetent, both maternally and in the kitchen, it seems to show
‘Cause if I gave you my flamethrower, you still couldn’t cook up a decent roast!
I'm beating this killer faux with the cleanest of killer flows that’ll make you dip worse than your little kid did
This Spy can ex your whole family, leave it quick lived, Box office earnings more stacked up than your shit hit list 
Keep deceiving those that you love, soon poor Loid he will have enough and in time you'll have nobody else left to live with, quit this 
Margo can fill you in, I’m quite vicious with discipline, shocking Anya like I’m a bolt of Tinitris
Ain’t no match for Team Grucy, our chemistry’s real and better, surrender 
Y’all got no magnitude or no direction, so prepare to get Vectored! (Oh yeah!)
This whiney, griny wine mom’s so bland, she’d cackle at my minions’ humour 
I was strapped to a tnt rocket towards a volcano, yet I’m not that boomer 



Yor Forger: 

He treats you like he’s over the moon, but you’ll soon regret him
The only husband to get the boot is yours; when you first met him! 
Kick around all you want, but you don’t pose a threat love , try to spit sick, I’m immune to poison
This loose screwed Lucy Goosey’s weak
I’ll leave a second empty seat at your daughters’ dance school (hee!)
Huge fan base, I got em’, your man’s dates you shot em
This inelegant hack, got sacked by a man named “Ramsbottom” 

Minion:
Hehe, bottom

You insane sell out, you should just bale out, like your hubby every time he tried to ask you out
I attack, fight back, show my foes no slack, defending my family to which I’m so devout
Kicking ass like the badass assassin I am, ace with the pen like I’m Anya in entrance exams 
A spy with a plan, a real man, this fight’s unlike your man’s business, it ain't your jam 
Tried to show your adoptive daughters affection but you spoiled it
Now I’ll leave your reputation like Gru, sitting in the toilet

Yor Forger vs Lucy Wilde - Rap Battle! Season 2

For this battle, two dream demons duke it out. Who has the cutting edge? You decide!

The video is on the way!

Alex M. as Freddy Krueger
Cri as Darkrai
JesseBoxVO & D3_sp41r as the Elm Street Girls
Beat produced by Hollywood Legend
Mixed by Serena
Thumbnail by JK03
Art by Lazer
Written by Jacobrl99, Birdjormungandr, and Special Inquisitor Rayyan
Additional Writing Help by SPM1000, Raisu Battle, and Awesome Ayden

The Elm Street Girls:
One, two, Freddy’s coming for you 
Three, four, said he’d muddy your lore
Five, six, blinded by his eclipse
Seven, eight.. 

Freddy Krueger:
Ending your Dark Reign, bitch!
Cut from the same thread, yet you come apart at the seams,
This tame threat Banette needs an ability to wreak Bad Dreams
I’m the achieved beat sweeper, the Elm Street reaper,
Intruding pleasant dreams, wet sheets drowning deep sleepers
This mother-pucker’s weak to fairies while wearing that awful scarf?
I think I’d know a Derry Queen sucking the soul from ITs vanilla arc
Dark Void as a signature, fucking forged by a beagle
Avoiding other villagers to protect them from my Dream World
Prone on the weak, since damaged souls make me whole
“Bon appetit, bitch”, banished to atone as a lonely ghost

Darkrai:
Wes Craven a New Nightmare, couldn’t find the right scare
You should’ve stopped right there, with the way you write scares
If you wanna fight fair, step into the light Fred
I’ll show you how the night ends, with your fuckin’ ninth death
It’s Darkrai, the dark type that’s casting fright on this pedophile
With harsh rhymes, of dark times when cast back, I’ll end the life
Of a child, stuck in denial, of Amanda’s haunted actions
Piling fathers like Spiritomb, the bastard son of 100 madmen!
Don’t need to use the real world for me to expose ‘ya
Wes went shopping for Serial Killers forming Freddy Kroger!
This Dex offender’s packed with Bundy, BTK, and Manson
Geez, with how you prey on kids, you need a seat with Chris Hansen!
Since your relevance has faded, nights are spent with another Freddy
With your cheesy puns and greasy mug, I’m sure they have a job ready!

Freddy Krueger:
“The souls of children give me strength”, fucker, try to understand
Will he, Freddy Krueger, take Alice to Wonderland?
I’ll unplug you for an upper hand ‘cause power is my toy, bitch!
Exploiting your weak spots as if I’m pulling off the void glitch!
Never will I ever, weather another lecture
From a lesser specter, bested by a feather
The crescent is better, prevents all your efforts,
sweatin’ her presence, waning for her pleasure
Ask Rick-San how I get my kicks in, I’ve mastered striking swipes
Shouldn’t mess with MK’s best, bitch! Aren’t ya weak to fighting types?
I mean looking at your fanbase? Shit, I thought my glove was edgy
When I banish you like Palkia, tell ‘em you were sent by Freddy!

Darkrai:
I’m not affected by your rhymes, I’ll protect Alice through the night
Hex him with his reflection, then Freddy’s Dead by Daylight
I’m bested by insects, yet your Nasty Plots truly bug me
Film after Film, Kill after Kill, this bastard’s never evolving!
Your trivial Pursuit’s revolting, Boo into Bo, everyone sleeps on you
Not a peep, this marred Mareep counts sheep to find actual use
Tensions boiled over on Elm Street when you ran out of steam
Because preying on teens won’t make this nightmare a Dream
Like Jason, Super-Freddy’s unmasked in this year’s masquerade
Shackled to the Bargain Bin, the rap battle slave is left a basketcase

Darkrai vs Freddy Krueger - Pokémon vs Anything!

VinnyO as Baldi's Basics
Vladimyr P. as Hello Neighbor

Theodore Peterson:
This world can be a scary place, but who’s here to protect you?
When you’re locked in my basement. ‘Fore I leave this I expect to
Leave this bitch in ruins, thinking I would’ve let you win
But Baldi’s Basically a Pedo so who the hell would’ve let you in?
You’re out of pocket like pocket change
Your low budget shit can’t compare to my game
It’s so Unreal that I suspect
Your graphical errors’ are incorrect
There’s rumours this intruder’s claiming to be my ruler
I’m a bruiser ‘gainst this loser so now I can be your tutor
Taught to shove you in my locker, there’s no escape when I spit this hotter
To a degree where you’ll need a Doctor, where’s your scholar Wannabe Crocker?
I’ll bully Baldi’s weak techniques that keep players asleep
So it’s no wonder that you’re quite the Strangest Error From The Deep

Baldi:
There’s no rapping in my halls unless the teacher comes to spit
I’m iconic, it’s ironic; I’m the one the neighbor worships!
I heard why you rap that bad; you’re just a held-back senior student
And I’ll sweep you like the floors just to radiate my amusement
Bash your birthday with my words no need for stealth in this challenge
‘Fore you made many Grave Mistakes; no shiny quarter for your balance
When we’re playing hide and seek you better pack your bags and run
Cuz you’re so dumb I bet you think that 9+10 is 21!
Try out this rope for suspension so you can hang in detention
My bars hit harder than your car that will crash your perception
Of my demonic oppression so let me teach you a lesson
On how to rap a good verse like the high school obsession
And you’re in need of corrections as I stand high- on the spectrum
I spit a diss like the elements used to make an electrum
If a prepubescent teen is what you call a home invader
THEN GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN or you can say Goodbye, Neighbor

Theodore Peterson:
Son, I’d let you roam freely, but your entrapment is what Theoadores
so I’ll board up the doors to leave your whole corpse a blood and gore galore on the floor
And Sure, you had some fame, how strange, that’s something I can’t fathom
Baldi’s Basics Plus the remakes now that Hallways equals a BadSum!

Baldi:
This “Alpha Male’s” the Beta version drizzled in despair
Because your win’s nowhere just like my hair, ain’t that your Waking Nightmare?
Your wife is flying high, I know that damage cannot be undone
But the reason you got ghosted; was your Millimeter Peter, son!

Written by: Vlad
Beat Producer: Prod. Brutal
Mixer / Effects: Vlad
Cover Art Made by Vlad

Baldi's Basics vs Hello Neighbor. Sinister Rap Battles

Lyrics/Beat/Trivia: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yyCM9vJd9X3SvoxC5fLrM6-PoeOKgtvA26Kj0ZZc3DI/edit
MetaMachine as Frosty the Snowman
KingSpirals as Hat Kid
Belle Beniko as Holiday Narrator
Written by MetaMachine
Chiseled by Shimario and Mancha
Beat arrangement and mixed by GamingPlush64
Thumbnail by YLFEthan
Beat by Anywaywell
Hint for next time: "Explosive Outbursts" (ft. Alex M. and garbageGothic)

Frosty the Snowman vs. Hat Kid

Jason as Alexander Hamilton
Mancha as Evan Hansen


Alexander Hamilton:

Call me Alexander, I’m a founding father
A self starter by the age you were tapping off to Connor
A man with a plan, yes I am, you don’t understand 
This bastard orphan’s gonna leave you runnin’ harder than your dad
You write lots of personal letters, I know what’s up, mister 
You’re young scrappy and hungry for your ‘dead “friend’s”’ sister (eww)
It’s pure luck you only broke the one hand, understand?
You’re so alone I think you’re gonna need a right hand, man

Evan Hansen: 

Dear Alexander

First of all, fella, you’re a liar, and a cheater
Can’t really understand why people call you a leader
You’re helpless, Alexander. I think it’s time you lie and wait 
You’ve lost to Thomas twice in rap, this is your next big mistake 
So read this verbal pamphlet, ‘fore you go ahead and snitch 
You broke bad so hard the Schuyler sisters made you their bitch
Step out of this, son, before you feel the Burr-n, sir
Your show has had it’s chance, but now it’s my turn, sir
Your words fail Hamilton, you’ve committed lots of sins, bro
So you’ve thrown away your shot, while I’m waving through a win
Though, Angelica’s been baffled by your all personal letters
But sliding into Lauren’s DMs.. hmm, If I Could Tell Her 

Alexander:

Hey, we’re close, but not that way

Evan: Sure
Suuuure

Alexander Hamilton:

You know what 
Evan, that was a real trash declaration (oof)
Listen to my mixtape I’m running the rap nation
And you’re calling me a liar? Your only friend is pure lies
Am I surprised? I’ll grab my pistol.. And aim it at the sky! (yeah)
I’m running the law, you’re under Murphy’s law
With kinky letters to Connor scattered all over your inbox
I’ll leave you ditched in a forest and I won’t make any sound 
You’ll never find true love with anyone ‘cause You Won’t Be Found 
I am Alexander Hamilton, going at you ham
Until ya accept you’ve Ben Splatt and leave this vict’ry to the champion!

Evan Hansen:

Alexander, Champion? More like bad companion 
Left Lafayette abandoned, can’t say no to this with rapping
You destroyed your career, man, what were you thinking?
Oh yeah, you were to busy with Maria getting Jared: Kinky!
I leave Zoe satisfied, while you’re cheating on your wife
That glass is not the only thing you have been raising all your life
I mean you raised your own son, got him murdered guess who’s counting?
Get off you ass and see your family, take a break from this accounting
Call me Aaron Burr, sir, ‘cause I’ll make you Disappear 
You’re non stop pushing people away for your career 
May be the broadway rap god thought it’s clear to see
You’re nothing without Lin Manuel by your side
Sincerely, Me

Evan Hansen vs Alexander Hamilton - Rap Battle!

Adam as Ted Mosby
Connor Terrel as Ross Geller
Ciaran (Me) as Marshall Eriksen 

Written by Ciaran and Adam
Mixed by Freshy Kanal
Cover art by Ciaran

Ted Mosby: 

You can’t oppose the, Schmoesby, “r/niceguys”
My initials spell “T.M”: To Make This Man cry  
There’s no training the T-Dog, I’m spittin’ fire, Marshall! Marshall: (Yes ted?)
End this man’s career, like his marriages, partial Marshall: Ohhhh
Don’t mess with the architect of your destruction, Geller
You wan’t Rachel to know that you like her? … TELL HER
Don’t wait around for other men to reign the top spot then 
Tell her that you lacked the balls to talk, ‘yellow umbrella’
You ain’t Friends with Teddy Westside, you’ll never see my best side
Your ego’s like your tacky 90s suits, oversized
I’ll be the one telling your kids how you met their mother 
She got off a plane, to go stay with a “Major Displeasure”

Ross Geller: 

Let me make this clear, Ted EVELYN Moseby
Your best friend stole your girl, ‘ain’t no Bros before hoes be
From Stella to Victoria to Zoey, you couldn’t handle her
It took nine seasons to reveal the Monica to YOUR Chandler
I’m idolized by 90s kids, you got no love professor
I’ll obliterate this first date love professor
You want to talk about divorce, Ted?, you’re never satisfied 
You spent your whole show finding “the one”, and then she died
You Grinch, I’m standin’ taller than the buildings that you’re making
My rhymes will leave you on the floor like your allergy to bacon
This old flailure should head back to the renaissance fair 
You’re go bad at getting girls, man it isn’t even fair
You’re show’s a rip off of mine, yet you’ll never last forever
Comedy’s central to winning, you’ve got no humour whatsoever 
I’ll make you confess to the Geller it’s your victory, I’m ‘Robbin’
You’ll be defeated.. sitting on an altar and sobbing


Ted Mosby

You’ve been through so many breaks, Ross, what’re you trying to prove?
Prepare to be like your show on Netflix, removed!
I’ll throw your win away like your sandwich, straight in the trash 
You selfish optimistic misogynistic kiss ass
I’m The best wingman, Ted Mosby: Rhyme enforcer
Here’s your’s“Ross Geller: Prime Divorcer”
Saying I love you on the first date's a mistake I was regretting
At least I didn’t say the wrong girl’s name at my wedding 

Ross Geller: 

You’re a Jerk, Ted Mosby, it says it on your website 
You couldn’t beat this Paleontologist not on your best night 
You lost the girl of your dreams to a dirty sleeping Stinson 
Ugh… Yet you’re bringing up weddings, that must sting, son
You’re so lame! I married Rachel in vegas baby, can’t break this
You brought your ex to your wedding and got dumped, man that’s heinous 
So before you diss me one more time, I’ll lay this statement here
Robin never made your day, your month, or even your year!

Ted Mosby:

You're a self entitled douche, that verse was the worst of them all
I’ll be there for your loss, when your reign starts to fall
Anyway that’s all for me, now Friends is back on the air 
it’s “The One Where A Man Child Got Beaten By a Teddy Bear”

Ross Geller: (2:11) RECORDED

Call me a Dinosaur, Teddy, but no rock will crush me today 
We all know that you and Barney are secretly gay 
I’m the most iconic “friend”, with the top ratings, and still trendy 
So Walk five hundred miles away, like your fans with that finale

Ross Geller vs Ted Mosby - Rap Battle!

Ryan Kelly as Harry Potter
HalaCG as Sabrina Spellman

Written by Ciaran McGinn
Beat by Epistra
Mixed and Mastered by Freshy Kanal

Harry Potter:

I’m Harry Potter, and I’m the better spell man
Facing off the Dark Lord’s daughter,  who could ever tell man?
I’m the chosen one,   I’m the flowin’ one,   my words prevail!
Your Netflix show is so bad, I started crying Riverdales    (Ayy)
I’m the most iconic magic man since Copperfield and HEART
This selfish teenage girl’s got no defence against my dark art
Tell me, Brina, did you come all this way to steal my ten points?
Or am I just the next teenage boy who you will disappoint   
Oh and on the topic of boys,   you’re not a love spiller,    you’re brother killer
I can see why they call you chilling,   but your sub par adventures are painfully bitter
Your ex dated your best friend straight after you detached
And I know you probably moved on but that must’ve been a Scratch 




Sabrina Spellman:

I’ll cast you a spell, man   since you’ve clearly lost your magic
Your novels peaked at three, but then it got severely tragic
Cedric, Snape, and Fred, got Riddled, man you can’t be Sirius
Call your author J. R. R K. Rowling, death makes her delirious (hahaha)
I’m the offspring of the dark lord, you can’t step to me little Gryffindor
Cause I’m bad to the core and I’ll leave this Potter more sore than a falling Dumbledore
I’m the morning star, you’re the mourning star of a magic school-
Who went from tragedies with mom and dad to Deathly Hallows 2 (boo)
You’re useless, I’m the coolest witch whose rhymes you cannot parry 
Can’t seem to conjure up a flow, yet they say that    “You’re a wizard harry”
Potter do not bother, beating the Queen doesn’t come easy
Sabrina is a  rap eater,   your Petty crew cannot defeat me 
Cheerleader by day, Queen of hell by night   who’s flows are tight!
Whether it’s Greendale or the academy, I’m always causing fright!
Are you just bad at witchcraft or diss-craft I can’t tell
Cause when it comes to rap offs you’re going straight to hell!

Harry Potter:

I know why they call me the boy who lived, I sat through that whole verse
Good thing your aunties direct funerals, ‘cause I think I’ll need a hearse 
You must be Baxter high if you think you can best Harry
Witch I’ll tally up my house points ‘til I win the cup of rapping
My lines are fire in a goblet,   yours are Lucifer in Nick
You risked your friends’ lives trying to save him ‘cause you missed his big

Sabrina Spellman:

Ugh! Sick!

You’re deluded if you think you can just bring up Harvey, Potter!
When I’m up ruling in hell, I’ll say hello to your father 
You endanger your entire school every single year
Because you can’t face off against a noseless blue excuse for fear
I’m the best witch, and a bad bitch, none can best this, top of Netflix
Spit electric, burn in hellfire, set my hair whiter, I’m the throne rider, keep my viewers’ eyes wider, setting foes on fire 
I may be a half witch, but I’m full of show stoppers
So I’ll astral project away, before you pee your pants, Potter

Harry Potter vs Sabrina Spellman - Rap Battle!

Cast:
Ciaran as Principal Goodvibes (Billy and Mandy)
Mancha as Principal Skinner (The Simpsons)
Adam as Principal Strickland (Back To The Future)
Titanium as Principal Vernon (The Breakfast Club)
Jacob Rozay as Dean Pelton (Community)

Written by Ciaran McGinn
Beats by Kustom, Hollywoodlegend, and Epistra
Mixed and Mastered by Freshy Kanal

Lyrics: https://docs.google.com/document/d/10wTanDEVDlKSWfphl-vYLPD9oUT_rN965iBbaHQB4Js/edit

Principal Skinner vs Principal Goodvibes - Rap Battle!

Jackson Kesecker as Thor
HalaCG as Adora/She-Ra

Thor:

From a team of strong heroes who just left Thanos to rot
It’s the strongest Avenger against the ’best friend squad’
Girl I vanquished my own sister, and many threats against my world 
So go back to your fairy land, little ponytail rainbow girl
I’m the god of thunder, you robbed He-Man’s thunder
I’ll knock you back to the 80s, where your cartoon is still a blunder
Your feelings for Catra couldn’t be any less low-key
You’ve betrayed here more than once, so you’re no worse than Loki
You’re not even remotely interesting in your series 
Just another carbon copy of Steven Universe, clearly
When it comes to fighting tactics, I’m the real Grand Master
You’re arrogant in battle, but your friends are a disaster 
So come at me with your Sword, Thor is going in HAMmer!
You’re as dull as Mermista, and as clueless as Entrapta
Such a joke of a friend and even worse of a leader 
But I’ll be the first one to beat you this hard since Shadow Weaver

Adora: 

If you think you’re a Marvel of popularity, you’re wrong, Thor 
I’m Adora and I’m adored, you didn’t make it to Civil War
For an Avenger who’s skilled with lightning, I thought you’d think faster that
You should have gone for the head, but we all know you’re just a noob master
Your sparks are no use against me Odinson, I’m a storm breaker
You’ve met your maker and I wager you’ll break and burn like your neighbours
You think your rabbit and hammer can beat this master of the universe?
That puny verse matches your Cinematic crap, not too diverse
You’re too perverse, you sat on your ass for 5 whole years
Eating Pizza and drinking beer, gushing in your own tears (ew)
When She-Ra spits sheer raps, you’ll need an ass guard, see
You’re not a worthy Asguardian, now just an ass with those Guardians

Thor:

That last verse you spat was just Adora bull
Looking adorable with your little dagger, while I can pull
A Hammer out of thin air, top ratings spanning 3 years
You’re not worthy of your weapon, and not worthy of that hair
There’s no Glimmer of light, or hope for you so don’t attack 
So bring me She-Ra!!, I’ll beat her before She-Raps 
You fought in your little Horde causing endless fatalities
Then abandoned that whole life and started fighting beastialtity


Adora: 

You’re rhymes are Hela lame, like your venture to the Dark World
I’ve burned you so hard your face is looking like Stark’s, grilled!
You couldn't Foster a relationship and look where that has you
A beer belly, and scraggly beard big enough to feed you ‘til your LAST film
I bring the real thunder Thor, you won’t see past Phase 4 
Ragna-rocking the animation genre, your movies bore
When I battle this phony He-Man, my bars are hard as nails
Pull out your puny hammer, I’ll beat you For the Honour of Greyskull!
She-Ra: 
Whack you in the eye with even more than a broadsword 
—You’re packing weight, a messy home, you’re the horde
I’m the hero of Etheria, you’re a failure full of beer, yeah
——You missed the head and plunged the world into  hysteria 
My ships sailed, while yours failed 
I’ll end you like Heimdall you’ll be impaled
We’re not the same, you’re insane 
You’ve got Hems-No-Worth, we’re in the Endgame
Repping the LGBT characters with care but
All you have to offer is Joe Russo and a haircut?
Left the almighty Thor sore more than ever before
Why don’t you go back to your shed playing fortnite with Korg

Written by Ciaran McGinn
Beat by Epistra
Additional instruments by Ciaran McGinn
Mixed and Mastered by Freshy Kanal

Thor vs She-Ra - Rap Battle!

Irish. 24 yrs old. I like to make music. I make Rap Battles.

Yor Forger vs Lucy Wilde - Rap Battle! Season 2

ZodiacKiaran

Recent comments

Alexander Bernard

lumi<3

h4lf_

GrenadeGames238

Related tracks