Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! Today, we have two video game digging masters, one classic, one modern. The Atari classic, Dig Dug, is against the Kickstarter game hero, Shovel Knight. 

B O R K as Dig Dug
Freshy Kanal as Shovel Knight

Written by Jughead Jay, B O R K, and MetaMachine


Shovel Knight: 
Got me pumped for a battle, but then comes this airhead,
A tardy paced Atari game with hardly fame dare steps,
To the Knight in shining armor that King Arthur dreams to be?!
Must be glitched, I don’t see any enemy on the screen!
You’re outdated, outplayed; digging your own grave! 
Abandoned in the cabinets, a slave to your arcade!
Now that I’m at my rap’s end, I’d love to know what happened…
What’s offered from another one of Namco’s has-beens?

Dig Dug:
For all the money raised, expectations didn’t live up
Your Knuckles couldn’t hit crud; 8 bars and then you bit dust!
The ship’s sunk in this Club, can’t spit up with Dig Dug
When this chump’s the type of fruit that I would go and dig up!
You modern flops lay buried, covered by the dozens
Joy-stick with side-scrolling, before I Start pushing buttons
I’m a grandfather of gaming, you’re barely even a Smash hit
Coining the term “Indie” when you’re dependant on the classics?!

Shovel Knight:
Your beep boops leave mute when I blast the War Horns!
I’ll corner a quarter-hoarder, leave him drawn and quartered! (AH!)
Buried in the dirt is where this punk rhymes at!
I’ve discovered more fine maps in the old times of Minecraft!!

Dig Dug:
I know dirt when I see it, and you’re no better,
This man’s rap trash will be my lyrical treasure!
I think you better yield, because with these rhymes I wield,
Sorry, Knight, but it’s obvious you’re lost without a Shield. (ha ha ha!)


Special thanks to Freshy Kanal for mixing.
Thank you for listening!

Dig Dug vs. Shovel Knight - X Rap Battles #5.

Merry Christmas!

Freshy Kanal as King Midas
Jacob G. as Jack Frost

Written by:
Jughead Jay, B O R K, MetaMachine, GamingPlush64, and Freshy Kanal

Jack Frost:
Best back off before having the match lost to Jack Frost!
And with all that gold you’ve racked up, it’s no wonder you lack brawns!
I could spit this at the lowest fahrenheits and still be hotter,  
But you’ll kill this if your disses are as solid as your daughter!
You couldn’t… catch this cold! Once your… raps erode!
With your ending’s past, you wish to see this… match unfold?!
From dinosaurs to Valley Forge, I’ll shine bright like lit lights!
You’re slipping on this track, looks like you’re walking on thin ice!

King Midas:
Surely you Jest if this fool thinks he will have me froze in place,
Your tundra of a verse will get crushed by my verbal Golden Age
Frost-bites the dust, when you’re left back in Santa’s sack
You can’t play your cards right, The King is greater than the Jack!

Jack Frost:
This poll’s off balance, of course it’d go South quick,
When your hardest challenge is putting your money where your mouth is!
The olden snowman has a-rose, there’s no garden from my flows!
But if you really want a foe, how ‘bout you turn this L to gold!

King Midas:
In Sprite of your attitude, you’re as mellow as an elf!
With those icy raps, you have no worries of melting yourself!

Jack Frost:
I’ll have this old man folding, frozen, for his wits are wearing frail!
It’s bedtime for dead rhymes and you’re the perfect fairy tale! 

King Midas:
You’re an absolute zero, whether dropping temperatures, or the bass!
Has your mind stopped-motion… you Rankin/Bass-ket case?
24 karats, and you are nippin’ at my nose?
I’ll have your chestnuts over coals if you want to start a roast! 
Quite a bold start, but you won’t flow far, for you’re below parr.
Let’s see how dope your colds are, when I go hard with these gold bars!
You heretics just won’t learn what your lesson is-I reckon this, 
With you and Elsa picked, icebergs will now wreck a second ship!

Jack Frost:
Made an ass of yourself on the mic, battered by immorality
Pennies consume your thoughts with that greedy mentality!
(AAAHH!!)

King Midas:
Oh you seem surprised; I sense shock behind that smirked face.
I know, how surprising that the Golden Touch came in first place? 
*maniacal laugh*


Special thanks to Freshy Kanal for mixing.
Thank you! See you next year!

Jack Frost vs. King Midas - X Rap Battle #6.

Dani as Baldi 
Alex as The Janitor 
Written by Cole               
Cover art by Lauren
Mixed by Light
Beat by Kustom

Baldi (0:15-0:26):
Welcome to my schoolhouse, Janitor, this’ll be a Bash!
Although your illiteracy might make it hard to pass my class
Steal a victory against me? I’m afraid you don’t have the key
So weak, flames from my campfire are enough to leave you beat

The Janitor (0:26-0:38):
Stupid Baldo… Making me mop up your messy flow
I’ll impale this freak with my mop if he wants to trade blows
I’m biscuit ball-ing on this beat, you’re more robotic than Penny
Kick-start having some ideas, or you best skedaddle, Baldi

Baldi (0:41-1:04):
I can’t send ya back to prison, but I can dish out some detention
To this loser who needed MatPat to get anyone’s attention
Step up to me with your glass hip? I’d like to see you try
When you’ve been killed by Kindergartners three different times!
This ain’t a janitor war, I’m not interested in your mop
But I’ll still spill your blood like B-Soda, I’ve got my win on lock!
“Wow! You exist!’ is the highest praise your games receive
Playtime is over, Janitor, and now you’re out of time to leave

The Janitor (1:04-1:28):
Your verse was missing all it’s disses, what is this? Hide and Seek?
Guess that's what I should’ve expected from a game made in 2 weeks
Even with your fog machine, I can see straight through all your lines
Clippy’s defective if he thinks that he’s getting the First Prize 
You’re on tier with shitty flash games, it’s no Riddle, you’re a fad
Next you’ll be saying ‘My verse was ironic! It was meant to be bad!’
Peddling a basic horror game to kids: it’s just shoddy
Once I’m done with ya the dumpster will have one more body

Baldi vs. The Janitor | Rap Battle

Happy Halloween :)
Dani Frias as Happy Appy 
King Mewtwo as Bobble the Clown
Beat: http://www.shadowville.com/audio//Shadowville.com%20-%20Bout%20It.mp3 
Written by: Cole and [Uncredited]
Mixed by Jordan

Happy Appy:
You know the theme: its Happy Appy! Helping kids and creepy clowns
Stay Safe when killings are sighted, sneaking stabbings throughout my town.
The only fires being lit are the ones to permanently burn pennywise,
Then not even Forenzik’s skills will figure out just how the monkey died
Going toe-to-toe versus a wanna-be Momo? Now that’s a funny joke,
Cause flow from apple juicy gore on MY show will make you choke
Until the war leaves the rotten core apple with the last laugh,
While Dr Death is imprisoned in a Bubble, Bobble. Try to brainwash THAT.

Bobble the Clown:
Hey Kids, for my next kitchen surprise, I’ll teach you how to cut an apple!
Thot your bandaids could fix your de-claying, when your in a cove of candles?
Your story was made to be bad? Guess the same goes for that verse too, 
Now listen children: here’s how to stop Happy Appy from coming for you.
Tell him to STAND STILL, and remind him of the trolling he created
It doesn’t take an O5-Council member to know Stick Stickly here is hated
I mean, just take a look at your archive pages desecration
Burning in Hell from my fire rhymes? Looks like it’s time for a cancellation!

Happy Appy ( deteriorated ):
Ready to see some natural violence kids? Guess Bobble should’ve re-run
The truth of hating you is that the children and I have something more fun.
You won’t be teaching slaughter fests when your rapping signal is blocked, coward
Watch as I cause a bigger crash then the aftermath of the 9/11 towers.

Bobble:
Despite having no ap-peal, you're still trying to show your glory?
Thank god your pathetic verse didn’t drag on as long as your story
I won’t be needing Nick Jr to make your history go black,
What does Happy Appy need? That’s right! Fanbase Class A amnesiac!
(Evil Laugh)

Happy Appy vs. Bobble the Clown (SCP-993) | SCP Rap Battles #1

WATCH THE VIDEO HERE! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtCCTMsVHP8

Malina Rose as Monika
Xhack as White Face

Written by Xhack, Jade, and GamingPlush64
Additional writing help from MetaMachine and Gengo
Produced by Xhack
Mixed by GamingPlush64
Special thanks to Xhack, Malina Rose, Michael/Stark Media, and Vivian

MONIKA (0:11):
Did Jade run out of ideas? This matchup sure isn’t fitting...
I’ll be GameMaker’s game-breaker when I beat you in one sitting
Seems this isn't Lucky Tickets for this poorly coded freak
This will be a piece of cake: I'm used to seeing through MCs!
Your vocal keys are rusted, and I don’t think you can revel
When you’re taking “Doki Doki!” to a whole different level
But when Notepad’s your claim to fame, I think I ‘ought to thrive
I mean, it’s a master poet against 2008 YouTube guides!
IMSCARED is quite the overstatement, looking at your players
If you're so cold then some fire rapping should be something SAVE-ored!
I'd say to watch as I format this poem based on your defeat
But with your fans already deceased? I'll be glad to delete.

WHITE FACE (0:41):
I assume you think you've won by now, but you've been deceived
That verse was a maze, one that I'm inclined to leave
I'd love to play some tag, honestly, that would be fun
But the mirror has its ways, let's reflect on what you've done
They say the deepest view into one's soul is through their art
And your murder's fueled by love but you don't seem to have a heart
You'll be kicked out of this battle, when trash has power off of her
They call your game amazing! But oh, it's just a moniker
This room is so cold… But my rhymes are still infernal
Blue screen that window, make your suffering eternal
Many hate anime, and some are quite confused
But I'll be over here, looking right at you

MONIKA(1:11):
That blow was more repetitive than your gramophone, but-
Writing-wise, you really could use a visit to my literature club;
I mean, mashing terms together, and you pass that off as elegance?
Man, the one thing harder to name than you is your relevance!

WHITE FACE (1:21):
Go and gather some info to go and try to drain me
And keep on all you want; no one file can contain me
Take your ren.piss-poor game, and close it down to make it right
But instead of jumbled color, you'll see blue… And then white.

MONIKA(1:31):
So repulsive your sole “friend” "pulled" a Sayori? ...Wow.
Just goes to show -- with you deleted, everyone can be happy now!

WHITE FACE (1:37):
You're on so many different people's screens to be gratified
If you won the player over I suppose you'd not be satisfied

MONIKA(1:42):
Icer sure nailed your writing; we can’t read it like your typeface!
Who’s a sole, worthless loner for eternity? Just White Face.

WHITE FACE (1:47):
Well would you look at that? Seems you're nearing on the ending
Get the ropes; your Twitter won't be the thing suspending...

[please never listen to my old battles] Monika vs White Face - Rap Battle! #8

LYRICS

Billy:
A mountain man slasher? I’ll make this the second time you must have died
Am I supposed to be afraid of the guy who got beat up by Busta Rhymes?
Franchise wasted, so face this, you’re passed the days where you were scary, it’s
About time that I come onto the mic, take my hatchet, and bury it
Struggling to top Freddy while I rocked his box office
So my Christmas wish is seein’ how you bomb this
Look at your viewers, your sister’s not the only thing that’s slept on
People struggle against you? Just bring in a retcon!
Shat on the mask of Will, now you’ve turned pale
I’d just grab some coffee to bring it some “detail”
Left babysitters dead? I’m killing the head of the church!
Feelin’ hurt by these burns, guess you do have nerve!

Micheal:
Billy Lenz’ copy is sloppy when it comes to spitting bars
You went from “Santa slasher classic” to flying off people’s radar
Your raps: soft, can’t spit Jack Frost, I bring the real yuletide fear
So you should just pull out of this battle... like your movie’s premiere
You think you’re one big guy to kill me
But I’ll just leave Santa falling back down his chimney
Should call you The Thing! That  abomination of a series
Going straight to VHS could never come near me
Make a Picasso out your death, but you’re already abstract
Just one more thing that’ll trigger your flashbacks
This 80’s slasher’s past his prime
So make like your grandpa and stay Silent, Night...

Billy:
Can’t tell which Myers I’m talking to, you both come off as jokes 
What? Do I need to bring the ether in so you can get these roasts?

Micheal:
Your reboot’s boring and lifeless, I’d put your corpse up for display
Since I’m good at taking out trash horror icons, like it’s Garbage Day!

Billy:
Yet after 40 years, you still can’t kill Laurie
It seems all your directors threw your story through four stories
You’ll lose your horror glory once I close Loomis’ case
And I’ll make Michael Myers Return to his grave

Micheal:
One flame can kill this Shape? Not the first time I’ve survived
You’re just the second bitch that I’ve eaten alive
I can tell you’re traumatized when you spit a song
So tell the children, once again, Santa Claus is gone...

CREDITS

LAR80s as Micheal Myers
https://soundcloud.com/lar-80s
Rabi As Billy Chapman
Lexi M. as Ricky Chapman
https://soundcloud.com/user-650786333-593076861

Written and thumbnail by Rabi
Additional help by Fightmarker
https://soundcloud.com/stopmotionrapbattles2018
Beat by Smoke
Mixed by Rabi and jort
https://soundcloud.com/jordydydy
Art by B O R K
https://soundcloud.com/borkrulesok

Michael Myers vs. Billy Chapman - Rap Battle

Cast:
Ciaran as Principal Goodvibes (Billy and Mandy)
Mancha as Principal Skinner (The Simpsons)
Adam as Principal Strickland (Back To The Future)
Titanium as Principal Vernon (The Breakfast Club)
Jacob Rozay as Dean Pelton (Community)

Written by Ciaran McGinn
Beats by Kustom, Hollywoodlegend, and Epistra
Mixed and Mastered by Freshy Kanal

Lyrics: https://docs.google.com/document/d/10wTanDEVDlKSWfphl-vYLPD9oUT_rN965iBbaHQB4Js/edit

Principal Skinner vs Principal Goodvibes - Rap Battle!

Cast:
Armani Sani as Phil
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiabcYVYR341G4Fryu03u0Q

FyxFynn as Eminem


Alanon as the Announcer

Art By: Mason 

Writing By: RobotRoshawn  


Mixed By:
RobotRoshawn


Beat By: vladseen 


AWESOME RAP BATTLES 
PHIL 
VS
THE SLIM SHADY SHOW OR SHOULD I SAY EMINEM
BEGIN!

Phil: 
The nutshack has come back to bring some ass
You think you are the greatest rapper ever? I give you a pass
Your songs don't come close to a killshot
You look like you got beat up at a parking lot
I got my own animated show, while you were part of a crappy movie
You don't have any way to stay groovy
With your bad behavior, you are the monster, Slim
My crew will always hate you, right up to the brim
I've had enough of your shit, I'll never love the way you lie
Your dad abused you so bad, it's like he wanted you to die
Everytime you committed crimes, you lose yourself
Losing your temper is bad for your health

Eminem:
I’m a Godzilla, god killing frauds when they popin off the top grab ya balls and chop em off end this beef but add some broth then force feed this mother fucker while calling ya mom
While I’m  duel wield chainsaws, till your brains gone, “you done son?” not yet ma, I’m busy murdering these wannabe South Park knock offs, I mean my god! Your animation so bad make me want to eat some buck shot,
*clears throat*
Dear Phil,
You nothin but a meme dude, bloody when I beat you, put you in the ground slam the box when I get through, mother, father, daughter, ya whole family gettin killed dude, get ya on your knees like a ho when the rents due, a psycho runnin gunner taking shots until this bitch through, never gonna stop until i run up on ya whole crew, burn ya all to death leaving nothin but sinew, Dwayne gonna have another heart attack asking where the money at when he finally see you.


Phil: 
All you care about from your fans is getting laid, what the hell is wrong with you?
That kind of crap is so wrong, get a clue
You're more annoying than a mockingbird
Eminem, face the facts, that you're nothing more than a dumbass turd

 Oh ok.

Eminem:
Yo Phil why you acting like a pussy Don’t back off
I can see ya real busy Helping your cousin “Jack” off while while riding that “Dickman”, you ok Stan?  Like stop man, sticking your fingers in “cherry pie” oh god damn!

Phil vs The Slim Shady Show (Eminem) - Awesome Rap Battles

Deltarune VS Mario & Luigi

undertale

DerangedStrange as Lancer
Snakebite126 as Prince Peasley

Prince Peasley:
This champ charges into battle! No, I won’t bow for your highness!
You’re just a daft amalgamation of Sans and Papyrus!
I Cackletta at your foolishness, and though it does amuse me
I’ll be giving you the axe, as if I were Susie!

Lancer:
My rhymes come in spades when I step up to the mic
Now I’ll run into you with…...MY BIKE!
Quit thinking you’re a Beanstar, you’re worse than my papa!
This pea will be split when I spit hot like stump salsa!

Prince Peasley:
You? Spit hot? Haha! I’ll say
Spades thinks he’s so Slick, but he’s as soft as Ralsei!
And with all your failed plans, we know who’ll win in the end
Spoilers! It’s not the guy who betrayed his only friends!
What you rap’s awful, Fawful! It’s you I shall oust
Want to see a real Lancer? Face me in a joust!
You think you’re the King of the Koop, huh? Good thing I wrap those!
Now Peasley’s Rose to victory while you stay in the shadows!

Lancer:
Yikes! I keep getting lost in your maze of a verse
You just kept dragon it on! This hoho is the worst!
Drop the pompous act, you’re even worse than Rouxls
In both the Dark Realm and this track, it’s clear that I rule!
You think that you’re a thrasher, but really, you suck!
Could’ve ripped me by the Seams, but you played a sitting duck!
I didn’t even need my armies to leave this jerk broken
Dropped my words like bombs, and now it’s this Joke’s End!

Written by Vivian
Mixed by Nekomancer
Produced by Allrounda
Cover Art by Tuna

Lancer VS Prince Peasley | RAP BATTLE!

Old TN by Paige
New TN by Fightmarker
Writing: Fightmarker, Vlad, Trakked, Paige, and FyxFynn
Additional Help: Meta, Rabi
Adam as Ghostface (voice) 
Michael/Stark Media as Ghostface (actor)
Light as Zodiac Killer (voice)
Fightmarker As Zodiac Killer (actor)
Mixed by Light

Ghostface (0:11-0:44)
Think I’ve had enough tricks, now I've got some tongues to slit
Blood is all you’ll be able to spit when I gut you like a fuckin’ fish
You’re outmatched when you Face this Ghostly blood spiller 
To sum you up; well, do you like boring serial killers! (Ha)
shitty investigation from your case will be the only thing remembered
When a 90s horror icon takes a Stab at a Klans member
Even without my persona, i’m still known to spit ill (guah)
Ask the rap industry, I’m a real Ghostface Killah (haha)
I’d be doing the world a favor to slash you and your pretenders
Cuz you’re either the unabomber, or a fucking sex offender
But I don’t care who it is, a Director’s still Cutting a bitch
Leave this dead meme rotting along with his shitty flicks

Zodiac Killer (0:44-1:06)
Dear attention-seeking teen, this is the Zodiac speaking
Make a gorier crime scene, leave you like your run on MTV
Don’t try to flee, see, when I’m on the scene; firing shots like a killing spree
What chance do you have; when I am the only one who could out-play a whole country
A bigger threat to the bay area, than any natural disaster 
bastard’s a ghost huh?, watch your brains splatter Casper 
real world’s dangerous kiddo, no coming back to life
As you make like your first movie, a bullet between the eyes

Ghostface (1:06-1:18)
Claiming   I’m dead in the water Arthur, well let’s not forget
Last time you were relevant was when Ted was a suspect
Only 5 victims taken, still claim you’re the bigger stalker
No, you’ll forever be known as the most notorious cockblocker

Zodiac Killer (1:18-1:28)
Funny how under those masks, it’s two kids working in doubles
This is gonna be easy, I’m already used to murdering couples
As my ciphers become legends even the smartest couldn’t of cracked
All you’ll be left good for is literally stabbing backs

Ghostface (1:28-1:50)
Think your letters can't be cracked? Let's see how your skull fares
When its up against the knife of Wes Craven's New Nightmare
I’ve had enough of this prick’s cartoony villain like schemes
So I’ll hang you from a tree, then make this flimsy bitch SCREAM!
You burn cars for a living while I burn precious lives down
Keep trying to sell pins as I’m Immortalized in my  town 
Couldn’t follow any of the rules in my trilogy of rap bars
As you struggle to shoot me, The Zodiac will see stars

Zodiac Killer (1:50-2:12)
Aw, am I getting threats from a kid in a Party City costume?
I've seen parodies of your parody be more scary than you
So let’s compare my kill count to your list of hopeless, dopey crimes
Took a glimpse at your gimmick, you wanna talk about phoned-in lines?
This ghost's frights are see-through; can't scare adults or kids
You're fishing for tickets, add another prick to my list
Even for a screaming painting, no one will never hear ya
Time to call the police, to report a verbal murder

old mix of zodiac killer vs ghostface

In the 3rd installment of Lame-Ass Rap Battles, It's a battle of the art programs! We have Microsoft Paint vs Adobe Photoshop. Enjoy!

Snakebite126 as Paint
Eric the Audible as Photoshop
Written by Commander Jacob
Mixed by GamingPlush64
Produced by George Georgia of Audio Network
Beat arranged by Commander Jacob
Thumbnail by Commander Jacob

Paint (0:20):
I’m opening the Windows, so scram off of my lawn
Don’t try to rhyme, dog. Even my palette’s a icon
You charge 30 a month for a learning curve that's straight doo-doo
Must've dropped the opacity, I can see right through you
I’ll grab a brush, swap the color: make this kid black out
Because I bet your raps aren’t even a Bitmap-ped out.
I'm the godfather of digital art, there’s no denying me
I’ll get to sinking your ship if you wanna whine about piracy

Photoshop (0:41):
If you'd like to start war, let's open an artboard.
Got a liquefied flow to claim the place that I’ve fought for
Look, like anything made with you, all your raps will fall flat
We’re already two different types. No need to up the contrast
Sketch all the sloppy shapes you want, I’m rocking the house
Your users likely don’t have internet and draw with a mouse
Mark this, my bars got a hardness of eight hundred
You’re even sucking at fillers. I’ll make you kick the paint bucket

Paint (1:02):
Falling flat? Check the thumbnail. You can’t scold me
Coming at me with those lines, you might wanna ctrl Z
Painting skies since ‘85, style pouring like rain
I draw the line on this mic; call me MC Paint (ha)
You can’t mask your overratedness. It’s hurting, isn’t it?
Hold ctrl and scroll up; maybe you’ll find a shit I give

Photoshop (1:17):
I’m known to burn tools when I’m spitting a rhyme
You can’t make a drop shadow, so keep living in mine
Look, you want some layered disses and blending modes? I got plentiful
For programs rough 'round the edges, I’d recommend the feather tool
Masks? I’m clipping you. No brown, but your pallet’s shitty, dude.
Get back to the junkyard. GIMP is less of a bitch to use

Paint (1:32):
You can’t recover from this with a healing brush, how sad
I’ve had more fun using an SNES mouse pad
Use your magic wand to select good lines, ingrate
Or continue making YouTubers’ slimy-ass clickbait

Photoshop  (1:42):
I’ve had to deal with dudes tryna do me like a clone stamp
So let’s crop and slice the comic sans of art programs
That’s how you lasso a win, no way MS Jank beat me
You'd be better off opening a verse in Paint 3D

Happy Appy vs. Bobble the Clown (SCP-993) | SCP Rap Battles #1

ColeTheCole