mmm DO IT

Oops, I Did Meth Again

The Cracksentials

Featured (various artists)

Riffs from Kepler-22b

Squidface Licker

Hamster Baby (Bikini Kill cover)

This song should not exist

lyrics:

I’ve got a gift for you, so open it up
Give it a stroke and I’ll fill your cup
Unleash the demon, and I’ll whip it out
Unzip my pants and I’ll stick it out, yeah

My dick is a miles long
That’s why I wrote this song for you, it’s for you
And when I’m creaming jeans 
It will make all your dreams come true, come true

And if you start to think you don’t give a fuck
This thing is bigger than a garbage truck
Unleash the weasel, it’ll give you a bite
You know I got the rizz, I’ll do it right

Rizztastic master of the dirty arts
When I’m done my dick will be smelling of farts
There is no reason why you wouldn’t want
My big fat dick inside your hairs cunt

If it’s not your birthday
It doesn’t really matter anyway
I got a gift so open it
That shirt you’re wearing now, I’ll be soaking it

When we put our heads together
I swear it’ll make it better
And when we become one
I’ll be glad to give you some

Choking hazard on the side
Just be careful on the ride
Smells like some old bologna
Eat it like some cannelloni, now dig it, yeah 

Big dick, big dick, big dick, big dick
Big dick, big dick, big dick, big dick

I've Got A Gift For You (It's My Penis)

mm do it

Faze 1 slowed stoner remix (Bob Goodsite) (Meth-Mastered)

Benzo Blues

Mismatched Socks

based on https://soundcloud.com/hahaguitargobrrrr/mm-do-it

mmm do it (again)

Maximus Obnoxius III

mm do it (1 more time)

Star of Methlehem

Macmeth

continuation of https://soundcloud.com/hahaguitargobrrrr/mikasdickpic with some less experimental / more generic guitar wankage

Tweet-o Babe-uh After Receiving Dika-Pika From Mika

Methverse Doggy Mixer jajaja

No Country For Old Meth

This is a loop I took from a friend's recording (HaLdEx) and then reversed it

teaser

Backwarts Blues / Junkie’s Lullaby

Methflix and Chill is what happens when Womb Raider takes 3 Adderall, crushes a Monster can on its forehead, and sprints headfirst into traffic.

It’s breakneck. It’s unholy.
It’s the sound of horny despair doing donuts in a Walmart parking lot at 3AM.

If your attention span has a death wish, this track is your church.

No build-up.
No foreplay.
Just blast beats and bad decisions. 🐸💨💥

original -> https://soundcloud.com/hahaguitargobrrrr/wombraider-alt-take

Methflix and Chill

Another Dic Pick from Mika

I can't do it... we'll do it live... WE'LL DO IT LIVE! FUCK IT! I’ll write it, and we’ll fucking DO IT LIVE!! FUCKING THING SUCKS!!!

FUCK IT! We'll Do It Live!

Shake Your Meth-Maker is what happens when rock bottom throws a dance party. Frantic, filthy, and vibrating at the frequency of poor life choices, it’s equal parts garage fire and nervous breakdown.

The BPM says “move your body,”
but the distortion says “text your ex and start a cult.”

This track doesn’t care if you survive—
it just wants to watch you vibe yourself into oblivion. 🐸⚡💀

Shake Your Meth-Maker

KYS 2.0: Electric Gigolo
life's a joke and then you croak   ☺️

woke up (unfortunately)

Methaphormosis is the soundtrack to waking up in your final form: twitchy, filthy, and strangely free.
It crawls, scrapes, and eventually molts into something uglier but more honest—
like if Gregor Samsa joined a sludge band instead of dying of existential shame.

It’s not a glow-up.
It’s a methamorphosis—
from human to beast to noise incarnate.

Shed your skin.
Lose your mind.
Become the riff. 🐸🪳🖤

Methaphormosis

Methnic Cleansing sounds like if a rusted amplifier got possessed during a bender in a collapsing trailer park church.

This isn’t a song.
It’s pure outlaw exorcism.
It’s a relapse with rhythm.
It’s the soundtrack to torching your past and dancing in the ash.

Repent nothing.
Crank everything. 🐸🔥🛠️

Methnic Cleansing

PISS TICK

Another chaotic experiment from my basement lab – approach with caution.

Noiseater Var. v2

We Found Alien Metal, and It's Changing Humanity Forever! 👽👾🐸

We Found Alien Methal

The Ultimate Alien Jazz Party! 👽👾🐸

The Methlehem Abduction

Fuck It, We’ll Do It in Reverse is a chaotic ritual disguised as a groove. It's the sonic equivalent of slamming the brakes on your own spiral, spinning the wheel, and deciding to drift directly into the void—backwards.

It lurches, loops, and glitches like time folding in on itself during a breakdown at 2AM.
Play it loud.
Regret nothing.
Unravel stylishly. 🌀🖤🐸

FUCK IT! We'll Do It In Reverse!

Siren of the Blue Abyss is what happens when lust, delusion, and emotional blue screen crash into a busted guitar tuned to your lowest frequency. It’s the sound of being ghosted by a sea witch after baring your soul.

Dripping with tension and underwater heartbreak, it’s less a song—more a slow-motion thirst spiral in distortion and seafoam. 🐸💀

Siren of the Blue Abyss

Possessed sleaze preacher slowly losing it....

Crude cover of Ween's L.M.L.Y.P.
Unfiltered, unpolished, and weird as hell.

Meth Wizard Karaoke Meltdown (Ween LMLYP cover)

Track 7 from the forbidden grimoire of emotional destruction. once loved. now cursed. riffs soaked in regret, delay pedal conjures demons.... ⚠️do not play backwards!

Without You

A 16-minute one-take jam recorded at 3AM. Raw, rambling and 100% improvised – mistakes left in, feedback howling (warts and all). Listen at your own risk 🎸🔥.

Full Raw Loop Jam Noodle Session (warts ’n all)

Close Encounters of the Thirst Kind is what happens when an alien funk cult intercepts Earth radio, hears LMLYP, and decides to respond. It’s slimy. It’s sweaty. It vibrates at a frequency only detectable by horny lifeforms.

Warning: May cause spontaneous orbit grinding and unexpected transmissions from Uranus.
Best enjoyed under strobe lights and mild psychosis. 🛸💦🐸

Close Encounters of the Thirst Kind (👽LMLYP )

Sepia Howl

The sound of craving something so bad it rots you from the inside out.

I miss you more than I want to die.
And I hate you for making me choose between the two.

Crack Me Open 💀

lil nylon jam

stranger lovers in a strange world

written and recorded 2010 by andrew salvner (aka pretzels malone, lil' spaceman)
4-track cassette tape - trk1&2-keys and drums / trk3&4-vocals

from the unfinished and unreleased minotaur project.  this song's at the beginning as the creds roll.

the words:
three point four billion minotaurs
fighting against
three point four billion wizards
(wizards, wizards)

3 point 4 billion

Sanity’s boring, truth is a joke,
I built my throne out of everything broke.

This is blues exorcism for cursed souls. Heavy psych riffs dragged through ash. Basement doom jams that sound like they’re melting from the inside.

It’s not good music. It’s honest noise. 
Unfuckable, unmarketable, undeniable.

If you get it — welcome. If not, you were never meant to...   haha, guitar go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

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