Eats you up from the inside
Multiplying like a virus designed solely to destroy
Fight so hard but it's impossible
Rendered helpless small mutations making anxious every

Moment that passes every
Hospital room knelt by the bathtub
Dark clouds hang above no more to empty below

Past mistakes and changing course
Newer treatments side effects that render function null and void
Medications fail to work
Curling inward causing fear and more frustration each

Procedure successful or not
Those hospital bills put red in the ledger
Even if surviving how can one live without food on the table
Moments that pass in every
Hospital room knelt by the bathtub
Dark clouds hang above no more to empty below

The Tragedy Of Living After

Of ill-fated love enterprises and bitter songs

*****

On my own

Babe, did you tell the truth when you walked away?
or when you said I was good
when you were forever sick I knew something was a little strange
and you couldn’t, didn’t, wouldn’t see me my heart would break

When your momma called you on the phone
You said “I’m home” but you were with me
Little girls shouldn’t be alone 
with older men, and that would be me.

Hey, I’m OK
we were not supposed to go
on and on and on and on and on for far too long

Babe, what changed you over the break?
why we never went back together?
then one day you texted me we needed to talk and you said
that you couldn’t, wouldn’t, shouldn’t see me and blamed school for it

When your momma called you on the phone
You said “I’m home” but you were with me
Little girls shouldn’t be alone 
with old men, who the fuck is old?

Hey, I’m OK
we were not supposed to go
on and on and on and on and on for far too long

Hey, I’m OK
I have always known
I’m on, I’m on, I’m on, I’m on, I’m only on my own

Song a week 2017

On My Own

Copyright 2018.
James Tristan Redding & Erin Wolf.
All Rights Reserved.
Lyrics: Erin Wolf & James Tristan Redding
Vocals: Erin Wolf & James Tristan Redding
Guitar: James Tristan Redding

A Sinner Like Me

Lyrics:

I wrote this song,
Sitting on my bathroom floor
Where did we go wrong?
Could have I done something more?

I’m wondering how
In this universe, we came to be
From so far apart,
We found each other easily

I’m wondering why
When everything was meant to be
Did we fall apart?
Could love be loved so carelessly?
Could love be loved so carelessly?

We live for moments
Fearing our mortality
Thank god in heavens
It sees us through reality

But I’m still, wondering when
Could I have seen the little signs
To warn me about
This love that would vapourize

I’m wondering what
Could I have done so differently?
Is there no excuse?
If loves been loved so carelessly?
Has love been loved so carelessly?


Copyright (c) Deepa Seshadri

Loved So Carelessly (Deepa Seshadri Demo)

Cover of "Forgiven" as originally written & performed by Xtho
https://soundcloud.com/cristhopper/forgiven
Song a Week 2017

Original Lyrics & Music written by Crísthopper Armenta
Guitar & Vocals: Erin Wolf

Forgiven (Cover)

Someone told me I should tell you "knock it off, stop it or
or else I'm gonna make you wish you had"
but I remember Marshall said when he made his children wish they had
they'd make him wish he'd been a gentler man
A teacher friend once said to me that kids behave when they can
and when they can't there's something going on
if everything that we all do is from a need, and for a reason
I think I'd rather ask if something's wrong

So I don't wanna tell you "knock it off"
Well, that's not true - I totally do sometimes
but I'd rather try and understand what's going on for you
in your heart, in your life

Who am I to give advice? And I don’t wanna patronise
but I’m wondering if you’ve got a lot to hold
I hear the talk around the town, I see you push the others down 
Are you trying to lift yourself out of a hole?
And what do I know, I’m just guessing, but there among the mess and stress
Is there fear and hurt, that don’t feel safe to show?
Do they tell you you should be a man? do you hold the tears back with your anger?
It’s how it was for me when I was young

So I don't wanna tell you "knock it off"
I mean, I do - I totally do sometimes
but I'd rather try and understand what's going on for you
in your heart, in your life

And I want to be free
to let the others bleed
And hold my tender self when that’s what I need
But if I’m whole and strong enough 
to bring my heart along I wanna 
meet the other’s feelings where they are 
Cause that’s the only place to start

So I don't wanna tell you "knock it off"
Well, that’s not true - I totally do sometimes
but I'd rather try and understand what's going on for you
in your heart, in your life

On My Own

xtho