Havent heard this in a whilee🔥✨✨✨

u should watch ur mouth when u speek to me 🎵♥️♥️

spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/2Mhha6rMmaPBt6UQl9TsU9?si=24f512be115c4e8f

Peripheral (prod. plxce)

~2300~

This song is raw and true to the place I was in mentally when I recorded it. A few months ago I left my long-term relationship as well as my home and first attempt at a better life for myself. I returned to New York and lost myself in substances and self-medication. This song came from an evening of blackout substance abuse which was part of an even longer span of time that I do not recollect. When I found this song in my macbook I felt it would be too personal to ever share publicly but as i've grown and overcame these obstacles I decided it would be a necessary part in the process of healing and moving on. This one is self-produced and I don't remember making any of it. Thanks for sharing this with me.

jumpedtoosoon

Featuring @seejayxo + @gramofsnowwhite

LYRICS:

[chorus: seejayxo]
she's cold like October
I feel like I know her
but she barely knows me
im losing her slowly

[verse 1: gram]

[verse 1 extended: seejayxo]
we still getting high for the same reasons
now you been in my life for a couple seasons
I been tryna make a change while im still breathing
like the leaves in the fall you just stay leaving
is it me or is it drugs? which one do you love
lied to my face fuck it I dont give a fuck
dont wanna try now, you just wanna hide now

[chorus: seejayxo]

[verse 2: gram]

[chorus: seejayxo + gram]

OCTOBER (PROD. IN BLOOM)

intoawall (prod. michael harrison)

Lyrics 🎱

I may have shaky hands
but Ion plan to miss
my dick stay in my pants
until im fucking the best
the conversation dry
but she stay soaking wet
work a 9-5
come home and ride this dick

ain't one for telling lies
the shit add up in my head
and if you lie to me
then baby remember what you said
I pick and poke at angles
And stay 1 step ahead
eat her out, Bojangles
oh shit I think I skipped my meds

they recognize me now
only credit's to my face
now they ask me always how
did I shed off all the weight
you should sit down,
idk know how long it'll take
to explain jus what I went through
to explain my everyday

Still can't wrap my head
Around all of this
And if you care about me
Prove you give a shit
And no I haven't been alright
Every since that we split
I've been wasting time
And I been smoking spliffs

Everything's been different now
I don't wanna go back
Now I find it funny how
I can make you so mad
making hella money now
I'm a fucking nomad

Strike a pose then
leave me broken
I build my guard
make some foes
then leave unspoken
try not to sob
get high through lows
fuck pills just smoke

know it's all a hard life
that is keeping me depressed
watch the age wipe my smile
while I'm force fed these meds
so my brain grow versatile
handling all of this stress
and my brain be moving miles
while your brain don't move an inch

nomad (prod. okaykoda)

Buried Dreams (prod rav3n)

Just Wanna Try (ft. Deshxn) (prod. evanson)

prod. by me

<3
lyrics:
and i can hear berts voice
its got me bleedin all nite
and i can feel it in my xxxxxxx
black ravens let me go
and now she tryna fall in luv 
i think i wanna go home
refe mansion
thursday playin on my stereo
blacked out
im layin in my bed
im drunk jus listening 2 yung bruh
omgggggggggggg
cuz i killed myself at refe mansion tonight
cuz if i could just leave it all behind ..
and find myself in chhchchchchoka paradise

chchchokaparadise (there's a party @ refe mansion)

prod. @4evrgone

lyrics:

I always forget that I am still alive
funny, could've swore that I had died
I got so tired of existing 
that I decided life was not worth living
but I am still a thing
much to my chagrin
I thought my friends and family missed me 
cause I've been dead since 2016
living my life like a ghost
the kind of life I like the most, yeah
seeing all the people in the street
but they see right past me
I left this earth like an astronaut 
filled with cyanide like an apricot
now I'm late like an afterthought
and they all miss me
I know it's super shitty
for anyone who tried to die and failed
for everyone whose life went off the rails
please don't remind me that I am still alive
funny, could've swore that I had died
I got so tired of existing 
that I decided life was not worth living
but I'm still here
for god knows how many more years
people said that I went missing
I've been dead since 2015
I called it quits and fled the scene 
with tons of anger and hostility, yeah
but from time to time
I check on all the ones I left behind
it's kind of funny seeing how it goes
like, the ones who hurt me seem to grieve the most
now I lowkey feel like an asshole
just know it's all love at the end of the day
I always thought I'd die alone, I never laughed you should've known x3
you should've known
you mean to tell me that I am still alive?
I fucking could've swore that I had died
I got so tired of existing
that I decided life was not worth living
now I'm no longer here
I permanently disappeared
check my obituary listing
I've been a stiff since I was 16
woahhhh x4

still alive (prod. 4evr)

[demxntia]

denim jacket on my back
man i feel like future trunks
drippin all black
w/ my shawty in the backseat
never checkin prices
when i wanna blow a stack
tryin to be happy
while u fuckers wannabe sad
yohji yamamoto on my waist
zip-tie on my lace
off-white with the stripes
goin down to my legs
i got bags under my eyes
for the bags in my bank
give a fuck abt a play
but i'm still climbin up the ranks

[vision4k]

got yo girl she on my team 
you know she sayin wassup
got whatever in my cup 
and ima never give up
undercover on my jeans 
bitch you rock adidas
bitch I’m movin slow pop a perc 
I feel like Jesus 

I’m insane off the earth, 
number nine on my shirt
bitch my vision is blurred 
I can never go unheard
you is broke that’s absurd, 
yeah ur girl she a bird
yea you talkin all that shit 
ima put you inna dirt ya

[demxntia]

denim jacket on my back
man i feel like future trunks
drippin all black
w/ my shawty in the backseat
never checkin prices
when i wanna blow a stack
tryin to be happy
while u fuckers wannabe sad
yohji yamamoto on my waist
zip-tie on my lace
off-white with the stripes
goin down to my legs
i got bags under my eyes
for the bags in my bank
give a fuck abt a play
but i'm still climbin up the ranks

i aint nothin like the rest nah
girl u know that im the best yuh
i am not fuckin wit any these lames
like ariana thank u, next
u should watch ur fuckin mouth
when u speak to me
please don't think that i'm ur friend
that could not be me
if u wanna feature 
then u better pay up
and when i make it best believe
that all my homies are up
man i used to split a 20 wit the team
and now i got the whole check on me

blurred w/ vision4k

produced by young apollo <3
<3<3<3
happy bday yorgan!

blurred w/ vision4k

demxntia 🌐🖤

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