A gleam on glass, a promise lightly spoken,
The moments fall, a slow and silent crime.
I sit here on the edge of a day broken,
Lost from the fading traces of his time.
A glassy shrine within my frozen hand,
Where his reflection, mute and still, is held.
A strange and half-believéd, distant land,
That will not open, that remains unspelled.

Is it only waiting? Is it only waiting?
This echo in the chamber of the soul?
To lose and never have had all control?
Is it only waiting? Is it only waiting?
A phantom promise falling into dust,
A wilting leaf betrayed by autumn's rust.

The world spins on, indifferent and fast,
A play of faces I no longer see.
An angel, maybe, from a sky downcast,
Looks on and wonders what has captured me.
The irony in glances passing by,
They cannot see the chasm deep and wide.
They cannot grasp the reasons that I lie
In wait for something that has already died.

Is it only waiting? Is it only waiting?
This echo in the chamber of the soul?
To lose and never have had all control?
Is it only waiting? Is it only waiting?
A phantom promise falling into dust,
A wilting leaf betrayed by autumn's rust.

Perhaps the test was never him to find,
But just to be, the self I left behind.
The silence grows where promises were spoken,
A brand new world inside of me has woken.
The emptiness becomes an endless space,
And on its shore, I see another face.

Is it only waiting? Is it only waiting?
This echo in the chamber of the soul?
To lose and never have had all control?
Is it only waiting? Is it only waiting?
A phantom promise falling into dust,
A wilting leaf betrayed by autumn's rust.
Is it only waiting? Is it only waiting?
The phantom promise has returned to dust,
And on new ground, I find a different trust.

The screen goes dark. No echo. Not a trace.
I breathe me out. I breathe me in. This space.

—
Arrangement and vocals: Volker Redder, Udio, Apple's GarageBand
Loops and samples: Volker Redder, Apple's GarageBand
Editing and sound design: Volker Redder, Ozone 11, Sound Studio, VirtualDJ, GarageBand
Lyrics: Volker Redder, translated with the help of Google Translate
Cover design: Volker Redder, Adobe Photoshop, ChatGPT

Is It Only Waiting?

"Redder" is a palindrome. Like "racecar" or "level". These pieces of music ain't.

My name is Volker Redder, online I go by "docredder." It all came about because I studied biology and computer science for a long time and received my doctorate as the crowning achievement of my academic career.
As a child, I sang Bach in the church's „Knabenchor Unser Lieben Frauen“ because my mother thought it was good for my soul. And it was, until, thanks to an excellent teacher, I realized that music is like mathematics. After that, I loved not only music but also mathematics and all sciences based on mathematics: physics, biology, chemistry, computer science. So, I went straight into the natural sciences and engineering. Yes, I studied a lot. However, a university career wasn't for me. I wanted to monetize the findings of the various sciences (you can't live on air and love alone) and founded over a dozen companies. Because who wants life to follow a clear formula? I certainly didn't. In addition to adventurous entrepreneurship, the subsequent career in politics (German Bundestag), and a growing family, I was constantly picking up the guitar or keyboard, which is what you do when you want to escape the chaos of everyday life.
Should I say I'm a virtuoso? No. That would be a lie. I'm just too lazy for that. Laziness, or in modern parlance, "efficiency," is a principle for me. And so I founded my "own studio," consisting of a lot of electronics and software. The hipsters call it DIY. I call it "not wanting to act like a big shot and book expensive recording studios." I'm a one-man orchestra, a chef-d'oeuvre who spends all day producing pop, rock, indie, and ambient mishmash until he finally finds it he likes. My menu? Pink Floyd, Genesis, Supertramp, Muse, Zappa, Miles Davis, and many more. Yes, all at once. I told you: mishmash.
There are guys who write music to become famous. Then there's me. I write music to keep myself from going crazy. Sometimes it's funny, sometimes there's melancholy in it, sometimes it's stories from literature or something sci-fi. Or from Tinder dates my daughters have told me. I mean, who hasn't wondered what "being in Tinder light" is? Exactly. I wrote it down. I use everything I can get my hands on: GarageBand, samples, my voice, AI voices, Udio, VirtualDJ, everything! I don't care if purists say it's no longer art. It doesn't matter, the main thing is that my music feels like a window you can look out of and discover something new again and again.
Every song becomes a little adventure. Sometimes I start with a line, sometimes with a feeling I can't shake. It's like an escape from reality, except in the end, there's no escape. And that's a good thing. This is how I stay grounded. Okay, grounded isn't the right word either. Let me put it this way: I've stayed true to myself. And I'm grateful for everyone who listens, shares, or comments.
It makes me feel like I'm not completely alone in this madness. So if you also like songs that don't follow the rules, I'd be happy if you joined in. After all, the world is crazy enough.
You have to fight that with music. I mean, that's logical, right?