of all the people you've met, why me
and what you see's what you get, why me
i know i'm not such a charmer
and i don't know what you see

of all the people you know, why me
though they've got more to show, why me
i thought i knew where i stood
but you think differently

are you just being kind
trying to find something to save me from
or do you really think i'm all that and more
do you really think i'm all that and more

of all the suitors who've tried, why me
the better-looking denied, why me
even inside i'm not sure of myself
are you thinking thoroughly 

are you just being kind
trying to find something to save me from
or do you really think i'm all that and more
do you really think i'm all that and more

are you just being kind
having faith that gold hides behind my walls
do you really think i'm all that and more
do you really think i'm all that and more

why me

This audio work is pausing on the presupposition that we talk to each other just to be regardless of our claims of understanding one other. "Talking to just hear yourself" is a text for one and also a dedication from one to the other. The text was interpreted by me and Ralf Wendt. Regardless of the form, people still base communication on presumption. Based on a free-form script for two voices which did not hear each others' interpretation before reading, this piece is supposedly working towards the performers possibility to question their personal dialogical triggers. More than forgetting their mortality burden, people are also talking to just hear themselves. This was created as a response to a call by oe1 Kunst Radio and interpreted together with Ralf Wendt.

Talking to Just Hear Yourself (Audio Text)

just uploading to archive
produced with Gelik Galang @gelik ! <3

Breathe

Rise

can't wait for tomorrow to come
just countin' down for the sun to
sink into the horizon
as night comes, i'm firin'

can't later come sooner?
today's so lame it doesn't matter
whatever comes around
won't be on my mind
that's the future me's problem
and to him tomorrow'll be unkind

suddenly

tell him
time ain't on his side
tell him
the future ain't so bright

where to go
steal my heart, steal my soul

today

Wrote this song during Dave Longstreth’s School of Song workshop! Prompt was to jump off from an existing song, and this was inspired by The Beatles’ Mother Nature’s Son. This is the initial voice memo with an arrangement overdubbed.

This course cemented my trust in the subconscious during the creative process. “Don’t judge / Don’t be precious” are magical words to hear when you’re making something. They set you free and allow you to embrace the moment. Learned a lot!

old age
down by a river
sun went down too fast

oh, day
don't be over
time went by too fast

Old Age

instagram.com/pure.love.energy

i can feel myself growing
and i’m so much younger than before
i can feel something changing
in me, i’ve never felt this way before

we only feel the difference
whenever dreams come true
but every step you take is change
though some things stay the same

can you feel my heart beating?
for you, so much stronger than before
life is full of transitions
and I never expect what I become

we’re up and down this mountain
there’ll come a time we’ll fade
and when I reach the peak, i’ll think of you
that’s where all my roads lead to

younger

i made a thing lol
-

stop the play, the poet is dead.
you’re dancing alone inside my head.
go away. please
don’t go away.

you live with the words that go in my ears,
you’re in the whines which my loneliness hears.
maybe i’m going
out into my mind.

when will it stop?
when will it stop?
do we still pretend?
are we still pretending? 

when you’re quiet, I know you’re not well.
i don’t have any secrets that i may need to tell.
maybe you’re the one
keeping things away.

one morning I woke up and checked the clock, then
it’s little arms told me that it was 8 AM.
funny how
you’re always there.
you’ve always been there.

8 am

The stars are so bright 
I’m under the sky tonight 
And you’re not with me
Your crooked smile comes into mind
Filled with all the things we didn’t say
So many things we didn’t say

You laughed at my jokes
And that’s how I fell
But sometimes,
I still don’t know why myself
And I still feel the words
From letters unsent 
Even though I know that our time is spent
Our time is spent 
*
Wherever you are 
No matter how far, whoever you’re with
I hope you know
Sometimes I wonder
If we still could’ve been 
Anything other than…
Just maybe
Just maybe 

Brave is the word
That I could not be, I know
This could have changed everything 
But I can’t blame myself 
For all of these things 
Maybe this will all work out someday 
Sometimes things  don’t go our way
But still
*
Wherever you are 
No matter how far, whoever you’re with
I hope you know
Sometimes I wonder
If we still could’ve been 
Anything other than…
Just maybe
Just maybe 

There are still days 
When I just look back
I hope someday that it’s
Worth a laugh
We’ll get older and wiser
It won’t be so bad

Wherever we’ll be
No matter how far whoever we’re with
Always remember this
We learn from our stories
We’re better now so let just both be 
Happy 


For Van Gogh

Music Produced by Lamb St.
Artwork by Lamb St. and Kamila Garcia
Bass - Acal Santos

Lyrics:

Waiting for a ride
She looks at me
I'm out of my head
I'm confirming
She goes on and on 
On how she looks

She's quite the image
Without all the lines
I'm an illusion
Of another time
She goes on and on
On how she's right

I steal a sight
When she brings the night
I'm out of games
And I'm left with
No one else 
But myself to blame

Cryptic messages
That are sent to flight
She smiles
'Cause she feels so much delight
I can go on and on
Lying to save myself

She hints then asks
Where this is going
She laughs, I sigh
This can't mean anything
I've moved on 
So what's the point of holding on

She danced all night to sleep alright
She kissed so fine but was it mine?

She moves in closer to me

No One Else

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8 am

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