(Verse 1)  
Fuck me like a whore, you know it's what I'm used to,  
I just want to feel love, even if it hurts me true.  
Trapped in a hole, but I can still see myself,  
Wrap me in the thrill, fuck, I wish I was killed.  
Fuck me like you hate me, you're my fucking disease,  
Time is running past, but it means nothing to me.  

(Chorus)  
Give me drugs, I don't want to feel me in you,  
So sick, so fucked over, what else can I do?  
I want everything I can get when love means nothing,  
But I don't want you, no, I don't want your sting.  
I have to taste the destruction you did to me,  
It's a hate that consumed me, you make me sick as can be.  

(Verse 2)  
Vomiting up the thoughts of you, cutting out the parts of me,  
But I still taste them today, they won't let me be free.  
I wanted to kill myself every time we fucked,  
You used me like a toy, put me through hell, couldn't get unstuck.  
Love was violence, every hit was depravity,  
I can't feel love now unless I get fucked savagely.  

(Bridge)  
I don't want to die alone, you ripped my heart out raw,  
It's already sick with promises, can't take it anymore.  
I'm done with it all, have to relearn everything,  
From the ashes of your hell, I'll find my own wing.  

(Chorus)  
Give me drugs, I don't want to feel me in you,  
So sick, so fucked over, what else can I do?  
I want everything I can get when love means nothing,  
But I don't want you, no, I don't want your sting.  
I have to taste the destruction you did to me,  
It's a hate that consumed me, you make me sick as can be.  

(Outro)  
Fuck me like a whore, but now I'm breaking free,  
From the disease you gave, reclaiming me.  
Trapped no more, I'll heal the scars you left,  
Love means something now, in my own breath.




Your Doll

RIGHT ROOM

“Perfect Timing, Dad” is about what happens when one person’s emotions take up all the space — when only one voice is allowed to matter, and everyone else learns to stay quiet just to survive.
It’s a song about the hidden damage that comes from being told what to think, what to feel, or what not to say — all because someone else can’t handle it.
Those moments leave marks that echo for years, until silence finally turns into anger.
The story in this song is fictional — but it’s true.
It’s true because it speaks for anyone who’s ever been made to doubt their own feelings, or who’s learned to laugh instead of cry.
It’s a reminder: never let anyone tell you what to feel or what to think.
Because the moment you give that away, you stop being fully human.

Perfect Timing, Dad

prod @bloodcryy @spaceboyry
w/ + sfx @ssj5-junk

if Ur gone Y im Ever even needed , ,,
the way U Treat me -- so Conceited . ,=
i Could b alone btch u Dont need Me . , ,-
I js Wna Die bae Plzzz .////

U js wana Cry bb me2  , . ,,
ion Wana Live lemme take A bluee , ,)) 
I was w/ The Starz ,, i Was @ the Moon , [[
ion Wana care if U dont 2 . . ,,

tell Me where2Go n i Will follow . ,}
ion wna B here 2mrw , .. ,
Problemz tht I have U can borrow ::
2Much sht i Cant follow ++

do u miss me . . ?
bb Im so fkd Uppp ,, u Cant even Kiss me : p
Ur Skin is glistening  ,, 
Promise if i Die . .. . youll b Comin w / ME . . ,

ion wna Change if Ik dat its Overr ,. . .
Ion Wna Be here Im not Soberr ,. ::
stay Close .. . dont Leavee .,, 
### #imNumbStabMe 
Im numb StabME , ,, 
### #imNumbStabMe 
Im numb StabME , ,,
### #imNumbStabMe

im numb stab me w/ ssj5 [bloodcryY + spaceboyry]

Buzzed Lightbeer (2025) | Produced by 3XXXT

🛒Check the catalogue: ExplicitBeats.com
🤝All inquiries contact: mgmt@3xxxt.com
🎹BPM: 144 Key: Em

Free for non-profit use only.

All 3XXXT works are available for exclusive rights acquisition only.


Buzzed Lightbeer - Crunk Trap Area 51 Type Beat

41544791156465459744545

4154598597874362652645212652

Original tracks:

I Don't Know by Erika de Bonis

Better Of Alone by Pronti & Kalmani and DJ Jurgen

(all credits to them, non profit use for me!)

Mashup:
by @prodghesti

I Don't Know x Better Of Alone | Mashup x Ultra Slowed x Bass Boosted

(Verse 1)



(Intro)



Spider legs gave yard moths, 

My alters rise 

Traumacore 

Saved my life



(Verus 1)



Void button eyes blood on my rabbits. Stuffed Bears ripped in half

With emotional burns wiping the infection on my candy coated life

Staring out into the violence next to the heart that was held so close to me

Never goodbye fights in the middle of the night you manipulated me to shame 

They wanted forever 

I want never 

Leave me alone I hate my life

Don't leave but I know you made me bleed but I have nowhere else to go

You abandoned me but creeped back into the shadows a rotten soul you made me believe I was by my own mental enemy 



(Chorus )



Traumacore breeds in my art 

Look into my fundamental nothingness that's locked deep in my heart

A beautiful heart attack I smile through the pain

Bite marked halo nightmare dreams 

Screaming terrors waking play toy dreams

With such sweet lullabies itching at the seams 

Empty playgrounds with no life bleeds

Doll house set on fire brings curiosity 



Traumacore works 

Cut out the stigma let the healing hurt

I'm ready I'm out in Search

For others like me



(Verse 2)



You left me with a broken heart buried in self hate and the guilt of even being alive 

So self harm was my escape 

But now it seems so blah now I make art 

Doctors share new ideas in the years of 2000 to 2010

Where do I go 

Trapped here in this isolation 

Trapped with you 

Bite me beat me love me I hate you I love you 

Don't leave I hate myself 

I can stop the pain is took much 

But no one ever cared 

They just covered me up in a little black box 





(Chorus)



Look into my fundamental nothingness that's locked deep in my heart

Traumacore breeds in my art 

A beautiful heart attack I smile through the pain

Bite marked halo nightmare dreams 

Screaming terrors waking play toy dreams

With such sweet lullabies itching at the seams 

Empty playgrounds with no life bleeds

Doll house set on fire brings curiosity 



Traumacore works 

Cut out the stigma let the healing hurt

I'm ready I'm out in Search

For others like me





(Verse 3)



Void button eyes blood on my rabbits. Stuffed Bears ripped in half

With emotional burns wiping the infection on my candy coated life

Staring out into the violence next to the heart that was held so close to me

Never goodbye fights in the middle of the night you manipulated me to shame 

They wanted forever 

I want never 

You left me with a broken heart buried in self hate and the guilt of even being alive 

So self harm was my escape 

Trapped here in this isolation 

Trapped with you 

Screaming terrors waking play toy dreams

With such sweet lullabies itching at the seams 

Empty playgrounds with no life bleeds

Doll house set on fire brings curiosity 



(Bridge)

Traumacore 

Traumacore 

Traumacore



(Chorus)



Look into my fundamental nothingness that's locked deep in my heart

Traumacore breeds in my art 

A beautiful heart attack I smile through the pain

Bite marked halo nightmare dreams 

Screaming terrors waking play toy dreams

With such sweet lullabies itching at the seams 

Empty playgrounds with no life bleeds

Doll house set on fire brings curiosity 



Traumacore works 

Cut out the stigma let the healing hurt

I'm ready I'm out in Search

For others like me



(Outro)

I feel the pain I have no more shame I come here today to share my pain 

I hope we can bring are devils together to play






Traumacore Art

(Verse 1)



(Intro)



Spider legs gave yard moths, 

My alters rise 

Traumacore 

Saved my life



(Verus 1)



Void button eyes blood on my rabbits. Stuffed Bears ripped in half

With emotional burns wiping the infection on my candy coated life

Staring out into the violence next to the heart that was held so close to me

Never goodbye fights in the middle of the night you manipulated me to shame 

They wanted forever 

I want never 

Leave me alone I hate my life

Don't leave but I know you made me bleed but I have nowhere else to go

You abandoned me but creeped back into the shadows a rotten soul you made me believe I was by my own mental enemy 



(Chorus )



Traumacore breeds in my art 

Look into my fundamental nothingness that's locked deep in my heart

A beautiful heart attack I smile through the pain

Bite marked halo nightmare dreams 

Screaming terrors waking play toy dreams

With such sweet lullabies itching at the seams 

Empty playgrounds with no life bleeds

Doll house set on fire brings curiosity 



Traumacore works 

Cut out the stigma let the healing hurt

I'm ready I'm out in Search

For others like me



(Verse 2)



You left me with a broken heart buried in self hate and the guilt of even being alive 

So self harm was my escape 

But now it seems so blah now I make art 

Doctors share new ideas in the years of 2000 to 2010

Where do I go 

Trapped here in this isolation 

Trapped with you 

Bite me beat me love me I hate you I love you 

Don't leave I hate myself 

I can stop the pain is took much 

But no one ever cared 

They just covered me up in a little black box 





(Chorus)



Look into my fundamental nothingness that's locked deep in my heart

Traumacore breeds in my art 

A beautiful heart attack I smile through the pain

Bite marked halo nightmare dreams 

Screaming terrors waking play toy dreams

With such sweet lullabies itching at the seams 

Empty playgrounds with no life bleeds

Doll house set on fire brings curiosity 



Traumacore works 

Cut out the stigma let the healing hurt

I'm ready I'm out in Search

For others like me





(Verse 3)



Void button eyes blood on my rabbits. Stuffed Bears ripped in half

With emotional burns wiping the infection on my candy coated life

Staring out into the violence next to the heart that was held so close to me

Never goodbye fights in the middle of the night you manipulated me to shame 

They wanted forever 

I want never 

You left me with a broken heart buried in self hate and the guilt of even being alive 

So self harm was my escape 

Trapped here in this isolation 

Trapped with you 

Screaming terrors waking play toy dreams

With such sweet lullabies itching at the seams 

Empty playgrounds with no life bleeds

Doll house set on fire brings curiosity 



(Bridge)

Traumacore 

Traumacore 

Traumacore



(Chorus)



Look into my fundamental nothingness that's locked deep in my heart

Traumacore breeds in my art 

A beautiful heart attack I smile through the pain

Bite marked halo nightmare dreams 

Screaming terrors waking play toy dreams

With such sweet lullabies itching at the seams 

Empty playgrounds with no life bleeds

Doll house set on fire brings curiosity 



Traumacore works 

Cut out the stigma let the healing hurt

I'm ready I'm out in Search

For others like me



(Outro)

I feel the pain I have no more shame I come here today to share my pain 

I hope we can bring are devils together to play








Traumacore Art  2

This is My AI Band for my Trauma Art Therapy Music.
All Lyrics Written & Developments done by me Echos or Nexus Khimera. Including how I created the Sound and all Lyrics are from my personal Experiences. 

Welcome I'm Nexus Khimera. I have been a vocalist & lyricist since I was 15 , now I'm 38. My doctors asked me to try it for therapy. I never stopped. I have been diagnosed with Antisocial/BPD Cluster C Personality Disorder, Dissociative Identity Disorder, CPTSD/ PTSD. I've had DID since I was young around 5 next 15 then through 19 to 38. My alters have been writing since 15, to help realise stored buried trauma & use their voices helping them to crawl to the surface. I'm a survivor of sexual, physical & emotional abuse & victim of domestic violence. My alters told me to start creating music here, when I started here I got sick, after playing them over and over. I got nauseous my guts were speaking to me, I could feel them surfacing. Crawling around MelanKholyia N the system. From family, to their friends and every one I tried to get close would abuse me, abandoned me or used me as a doll until I was as hollow as the echoes of the fundamental nothingness the obsidian womb. This is my Trauma Art Therapy. Bringing Mental Health Awareness to music notes. If you struggle with | Dissociative Identity Disorder | Antisocial Personality Disorder CPTSD PTSD. This music just for us <3.
 Thank you for your support. Thank you for not taking my music or stuff out of what I'm really trying to do now with the info I have now told confronted my on my family telling them what happened tonight. As last night for the first time I confronted my family. All I got was lies from them as they turned what they have done against me as they have my whole life now I have proof , at this point their lies and denial has got me to this point.
I will not hide myself or feel ashamed to tell the truth now because I've learn to accept myself for once I my life. I'm sick of this self hate and disgusted because of what I have become because of my environments and things that happened to me. Because of the embarrassment and how much I hate myself because well that's whats happens when everytime you try to say something others are invading the places. That are made to be safe. I'm not going to stay quite ever again I will scream out until I lose all breath. The stigma must be broken .

38 Years old

Syracuse IN

With a Masters & Dissociative Degree N Damage & Art

I write all lyrics in both Bands

Regarding the musical projects, "Echo's N Melankholyia" is an online band where I serve as the lyricist and intend to transition into vocal duties. For the live band "Mothyii," I am the lyricist and vocalist. As a professional artist, poet, and lyricist, I have received diagnoses for ASPD, BPD, DID, ADHD, SAD, OCD, GAD, Panic Disorder, Agoraphobia, and Hypersexuality.

Nexus Khimera utilizes musical expression as a form of trauma art therapy, channeling experiences of abuse, toxic relationships, and addiction into compositions. The artist's work, reflecting a journey of survival and recovery, incorporates elements of Goth Rock, Industrial Rock, Nu Metal, Gothcore, Post Rock, Grunge, Post Grunge, Dark Wave, and cyberpunk. The resulting soundscapes are characterized by haunting atmospheres, dark ambient textures, and emotionally charged layers, reflecting themes of mental health and personal struggle. As Nexus Khimera, I operate as an artist, poet, lyricist, and vocalist, exploring the complexities of the human psyche within the context of cosmic themes. My creative endeavors, influenced by Borderline Personality Disorder and the effects of past trauma, serve as a means of processing and transforming internal struggles. My artistic practice encompasses a range of mediums, including charcoal drawings that blend biomechanical and Lovecraftian elements, dark surrealism, and abstract expressions derived from emotional experiences. Through a combination of AI-assisted and traditional techniques, I aim to confront and transmute personal traumas into evocative visual narratives. My poetry also plays a crucial role in this process. My artistic expression, characterized by free verse, unconventional lyrics, and a distinctive vocal delivery, functions as a therapeutic outlet, allowing for the articulation of complex emotions and observations of a world often perceived through a somber lens.

I invite you to explore this realm of shadowed beauty and candid revelations. Please follow Nexus Khimera on social media to stay informed about his creative endeavors.

Thank you for your visit. I hope your day is filled with moments of both wonder and introspection. I encourage you to return soon.

Please explore my band, Echo's N Melankholyia, and consider subscribing.

[Links to YouTube, Suno, and Facebook]

© 2025 by Echo's N Melankholyia. Lyrics by Nexus Khimera. All rights reserved. Music generated with Suno AI. Date: September 5, 2025. "It all Begins." Decipher the underlying messages. Encryption is my method.Characterized by free verse, unconventional lyrics, and a distinctive vocal delivery, it functions as a therapeutic outlet, allowing for the articulation of complex emotions and observations of a world often perceived through a somber lens.

I Invite you to explore this realm of shadowed beauty and candid revelations. Please follow Nexus Khimera on social media to stay informed about his creative endeavors.

Thank you for your visit. I hope your day is filled with moments of both wonder and introspection. I encourage you to return soon.

Please explore my band, Echo's N Melankholyia, and consider subscribing. Thank you all for your support.

Your Doll

Echo's N MelanKholyia

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