Why Am I Not   songwriter Edwin H. Balder

"I’ve been chasing shadows in a room without a name,
Trying to find the rhythm of a love I couldn’t claim."

I remember the hum of the highway, your hand on the wheel,
The way the silence between us felt heavier than steel.
ooo,..hmm..(aaah,..hmm) aaah
But the chorus never came, just a verse that wouldn’t end,
A story of two strangers pretending to be friends.
 loved, not famous, not enough?
Why does the world feel like it’s calling my bluff?
I’m searching for a groove, a soulful, sexy hit,
But all I find are echoes of the dreams I quit.
I’m tangled in the static of a broken radio,
Trying to tune into a frequency I’ll never know.
The rain tapped on the window, a Morse code of regret,
Spelling out the words I’m too afraid to forget.
you said we were a masterpiece, but the colors ran dry,
Now I’m left with a canvas of a fractured goodbye.
why am I not loved, not famous, not enough?
Why does the world feel like it’s calling my bluff?
I’m searching for a groove, a soulful, sexy hit,
But all I find are echoes of the dreams I quit.
I’m tangled in the static of a broken radio,
Trying to tune into a frequency I’ll never know.
I’ve been a stranger in my own skin,
 playlist of songs I can’t win.
I’m learning to dance to the rhythm of my own beat,
Finding the melody in the bittersweet.
The sun breaks through the curtains, a soft, forgiving light,
And for the first time in forever, I feel  a bit all-right
The radio’s still playing, but the static’s finally clear,
And the song that’s coming through is the one I need to hear.
Why am I not loved? Maybe I always was.
Why am I not famous? Maybe fame’s just a buzz.
No more chasing shadows, no more static to find,
Just the rhythm of my heartbeat, one step at a time.


Link to the best of our R & B, Soul, Funky, Hip Hop, Rap & Blues Bangers you can cover  to add hit power to your world https://soundcloud.com/edwin-balder/sets/hit-r-b-funky-bangers-by-edwin?si=a366189f83684571b35fd59768210669&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

All Rights Reserved Edwin H. Balder
Thanks so much to my band: Hot Cookie
See Our Music Videos Here> https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-509h42heKT05D8egf2U9w

Why Am I Not by EH..B

In the shadows of Apache Junction, at the foot of the majestic Superstition Mountains, sits a weathered hacienda. This desert oasis is home to an enigmatic figure, a songwriter whose journey reads like a long, dusty road of honky-tonk bars and college cafeterias. He wasn't chasing fame or glitter; instead, he chose the soul-crushing beauty of music for music's sake.

Years spent hunched over sticky barroom tables and scribbling lyrics on napkins earned him a reputation—not in the spotlight but in the back rooms where deals are made. He wrote melodies that found their way into the hearts of stars who had lost their own muse. He sold his creations for cash, with no recognition, but the whisper of his songs carried the weight of his soul.

Finally, he bought this piece of desert paradise—a stable income from his timeless songs allowed him to live comfortably, if anonymously. Here in this hacienda, with his family beside him and the mountains as his backdrop, he found the peace to write hits under his own name. He chuckled at the irony that now, without chasing fame, he could create music that brought him joy.

In the end, it was never about the spotlight. It was about the journey, the stories, and the songs that wrote themselves through his life. As the sun set behind the Superstitions, casting long shadows over the hacienda, he strummed his guitar and sang—content, unknown, and unburdened by the world's gaze.


Copyright 2019 Edwin H. Balder

I may be dead when fame comes but my real glory was always JULIE & The Kids. Thank you for such love

Why Am I Not by EH..B

Edwin Balder