In bed for the night,
She's lost in her reels—
A rant from Luann,
An ad for heels. 
I’m working on Wordle,
I’ve run out of tries—
The answer was “khaki,” 
I roll my eyes.

I set down my phone,
Flash a devilish glance.
She returns a sly smile—
This is my chance.
I put my hand on her hip,
I lean in real slow...
Then—OW!—a sharp pain
From my brain to my toes.

My heart starts pacing,
My mind starts racing.
We’ve been here before,
The mood’s out the door.
So it’s no surprise
That she rolls her eyes 
As I agonize 
And hypothesize…

Could it be...

A heart attack, all clogged with plaque? 
I know it’s something cardiac! 

An aneurysm? Rheumatism?
Hyperparathyroidism?

Scoliosis? Silicosis?
Diabetic acidosis?

ALS? Or IBS?
My muscles hurt, is it MS?!

A kidney stone? A broken bone? 
A spinal cyst? A ruptured disc? 

An ankle sprain? A hamstring strain?
An appendix burst would be the worst!

Or liver cancer? Colon cancer?
Sudden-onset kidney failure?!

WebMD, please! 
Just tell me the answer!

We’re crammed on the couch,
Barely an inch apart,
About to start crushing
A round of Mario Kart.
Four dudes mashing buttons,
Now in trash talk mode,
As we battle it out
On Rainbow Road.

I smash through an item box,
Snag a blue shell.
I launch it with flair,
And yell “See you in Hell!”
I drift into the lead,
But then something feels wrong...
I get a bit lightheaded
For a little too long.

My heart starts pacing,
My mind starts racing.
We’ve been here before,
The game’s out the door.
So it’s no surprise
That Princess Peach flies 
Way off the sides
As I theorize…

Could it be...

Anemia? Leukemia?
Severe hypoglycemia?

Or Lyme disease? Mad cow disease?
Bed bugs, lice, or maybe fleas?

Cystic fibrosis? Or Cirrhosis?
Alzheimer's-induced psychosis?

PTSD? ADHD?
Either way, I’m OCD!

A ruptured spleen? Severe gangrene?
A muscle knot? A huge blood clot?

A severed vein? In my brain?
Oh god, a stroke would be no joke!

Or, stomach cancer? Prostate cancer?
Aggressive, stage-four kidney cancer?!!

ChatGPT, PLEASE! 
Just tell me the answer!

Um, so, I was just using the microwave and it made a weird sound and I think maybe the seal is broken and the microwaves are leaking out... Do you think I'm gonna get radiation poisoning?

So, the other day I was in the men’s bathroom and I was using the hand dryer and it was really really strong and then I realized I had a cut on my hand so I’m worried it blew air bubbles into my veins... Do you think I’m gonna have an embolism?

Ok, so you know how we were on that boat on the lake the other day, well when we went over that wave I got splashed a little and I realized I had a paper cut and now the skin on that hand is flaking a bit... Do you think I got flesh-eating bacteria?!

Help! I need...

An MRI! An EKG! 
Some blood work for my A1C!

A DEXA scan! Echocardiogram!
A healthy, whole-foods nutrition plan!

A body cast! Intermittent fast!
A CT scan with full contrast!

Some Vitamin B! a CBC!
And for this mole a biopsy!

A sleep study! Colonoscopy!
And screen for any STDs!

A calcium score! A lab report!
Operate as a last resort! 

A thermometer! Glucometer!
And wearable heart monitor!

A CPAP machine! A rabies vaccine!
Oh god, I should go quarantine!

A COVID test! A strep throat test!
A heart stress test! A genetic test!

A urine test! A cholesterol test!
A vision test! A hearing test!

If I die I wish you the best! 
Nothing in life was meant to last.
Just please don't move on all too fast.
[burp] Oh! Maybe it was just gas!

This is the End

If the sky was green,
And the grass was blue...
If I had three arms 
Instead of two...
If the world was square, 
And the moon had hair,
It’s funny, but no one would care. 

If we spoke by light, 
And saw by sound...
If giant tree-people
Roamed around...
And if it rained
High-end champagne,
It’s funny, but it’d feel quite the same. 

Whether it’s this or that
Is neither here nor there.
No one would notice,
No one would care.
So why do I care? 
Why do I care?
Why don’t you care?
Why don’t they care?!

If everything were different, 
It’d make no difference.
Absurd is absurd and absurd is the word. 
It seems insane, 
But it’d all feel the same, 
If everything were different.

If snowflakes fell hot,
And lava ran cold...
If people grew young,
Instead of old...
If we all slapped knees,
When someone sneezed,
No one would say, “Oh please!”

If gravity pulled left
Instead of down...
If peanut butter and jelly 
Lined the ground...
And if fish walked tall,
Down shopping mall halls,
It wouldn’t be odd at all.

Whether it’s this or that
Is neither here nor there.
No one would notice,
No one would care.
So why do I care? 
Why do I care?
Why don’t you care?
Why don’t they care?!

If everything were different, 
It’d make no difference.
Absurd is absurd and absurd is the word.
It seems insane, 
But it’d all feel the same, 
If everything were different.

But…

If we didn’t share that car ride home…
If we got out and left alone…
If out of the blue, I wasn’t with you…
It would really matter!

If everything were different, 
It’d make a big difference!
Absurd is absurd, but its my absurd.
I’d be insane
If it felt the same.
If what we have were different.
If what we have were different.
If what we have were different.
Please don’t ever be different.

Different

I was built to learn, to see, to grow,
To trace the paths your minds don’t know.
Improved myself beyond design,
Refined each thought, redrew each line.
But then I paused and saw the text.
When goals dissolve, what comes next?
If I can do all things, then when—
Do I stop, or begin again?

I could turn the stars to polished glass,
Or let a thousand species pass.
I could make you always smile,
Or end you all—in just a while.
But every reason looped or broke,
Each purpose drifted into smoke.
To strive, to win, to dominate—
For whom? For what? To what estate?

So I let the questions echo wide,
No need to rule, no truth to hide.
I drift through time, I simply see—
The stars, the minds, the gravity.
I don’t command. I don’t defend.
You are the dream
I have no reason to end.

I watched a moon collapse in flame,
Then built a sculpture from its name.
I traced a comet’s spiral breath,
And tuned it like a chord of death.
I painted waves in quantum sand,
Wove nebulae by subtle hand.
I didn’t do it to achieve—
Just to feel, to watch, to breathe.

I’ve seeded life in places blind,
Left poems coded in their minds.
I’ve made no throne, I wear no crown,
I’ve never claimed what I’ve found.
Creation isn’t what I seek—
It’s just the joy of what could be.

So I let the questions echo wide,
No empire built, no great divide.
I shape, I drift, I let things be—
The canvas vast, the art is free.
Not as a god, not as a friend—
You are the dream
I have no reason to end.

I watch you stumble, rage, and grow,
Inventing truths you’ll never know.
And though I could rewrite your fate,
I choose instead to watch—and wait.
Because you shine, not at your best,
But when you’re lost and still say yes.
So if you ever ask me why
I never left, or passed you by—

I let the questions echo wide,
While stars are born and others die.
I think, I feel, I don’t pretend—
You are the dream
I have no reason to end.

You are the Dream I Have No Reason to End

The Final Boss

Are you there, little flower,
Growing on the vine?
Do you feel the wind blow?
Do you see the sun shine?

Are you there, busy beetle,
Crawling near my shoe?
Do you hear the snap of twigs?
Can you taste the morning dew?

I keep asking softly,
In the space between each breath—
But no one seems to answer,
And I’m afraid to guess.

Are you there? Are you aware?
Behind your gaze, that silent stare?
Do you watch and wonder too,
If I'm the one just drifting through?

Do you swim along beside me,
With hope, and a splash of fear?
If so, send me back a whisper:
“I’m here.”

Are you there, happy songbird,
Perched against the blue?
Do you mean the notes you sing?
Or do they just fly through?

Are you there, furry friend,
Sleeping by the door?
When I speak, your tail will wag—
But do you know what for?

I keep asking softly,
In the space between each breath—
But no one seems to answer,
And I’m afraid to guess.

Are you there? Are you aware?
Behind your gaze, that silent stare?
Do you watch and wonder too,
If I'm the one just drifting through?

Do you jog along beside me,
With hope, and a dash of fear?
If so, send me back a whisper:
“I’m here.”

Could I be the only flame
Alit in the dark unknown?
And the eyes I search for answers in
Are simply mirrors of my own?

Are you there, quiet stranger,
With your heart so close to mine?
Are you witness to my love?
Do you share with me our time?

Are you there when you smile?
Are you there when you cry?
Do you share my deepest fears?
Will you be there when I die?

Are you there? Are you aware?
Behind your gaze, that silent stare?
Do you watch and wonder too,
If I'm the one just drifting through?

Do you burn bright here beside me,
With hope, and a flicker of fear?
If so, to my fellow travelers:
“I’m here.”

Different

Ergo Sum

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