this some insane stuff bro u guys better blow tf up

i swearrr, this song hits harder everytime

you said you didnt want no one
now youre boo'd up and im still fucking stuck alone
i said ill never talk to anyone again
but thats a lie and we both know what i meant
we both know what i meant, it was honorific 
we both know what you meant when you said that
im tired of dealing with this shit
i always fucking loved you even after every hit
i was fucking bad, now im worse
atleast when i was bad i had someone to text first
i guess we had fun but thats it
i still have your note on my wall and it hurts my heart
yeah it hurts my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah it hurts my heart
i dont have nothing going for me
maybe music, but thats not gonna heal me
im screaming out and i want someone to hear me
i think its impossible to find someone who feels me
i dont ask for much.
just to be hugged, just to be loved for once
i dont ask for much, just to be loved, fucked for once
i dont ask for much, just to feel someone touch on my skin
i dont ask for much, i just wanna experience love like everyone does
i dont ask for much, i just wanna feel safe in somebodys arms
someone to keep me outta dodge
someone who can keep me alive in the dark
someone i can rely on
someone who wont leave me for a boy thats -
wrong.
im only here cause i love you
i met you for a reason now i need you
i dont wanna get attached
but i love you

you said you didnt want no one
now youre boo'd up and im still fucking stuck alone
i said ill never talk to anyone again
but thats a lie and we both know what i meant
we both know what i meant, it was honorific 
we both know what you meant when you said that
im tired of dealing with your shit
i always fucking loved you even after every hit.
i was fucking bad, now im worse
atleast when i was bad i had someone to text first
i guess we had fun but thats it
i still have your note on my wall and it hurts my heart
yeah it hurts my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah it hurts my heart
yeah it hurts my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah you own my heart..

alive in the dark (afterlife x pekarot)

guitar by acey <3
enjoy~

lyrics
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i am really dead
taking all the time i have to run it  through my head
kissing on the post, and yet were running to our graves
im lost and fictions running through the top part of my brain
and makes me wanna say

did you notice that im crying in my bed
lost and out of focus, all i wanted, all i said
the moon is telling stories, even time when we aren't friends
i just couldn't notice all the reasons i depend
on ur loving, full offence

yet i am full of dread, and i cant focus what said
the moon is telling stories all i want, and all i said, i could never not, 

but you wanna open up my heart
tell me all ur problems baby, don't know where to start
life is pretty scary, finding love is pretty hard
and open up to people when ur feeling kina scared

you dont know anyone inside ur head
you left a thousand  miles in ur car, ur friends are dead
its been a couple years and now ur terrified to death
and honestly me too
i dont know what to do
im lost and im confused!


yet i am full of dread, and i cant focus what said
the moon is telling stories all i want, and all i said, i could never not, 
UR ALL I EVER WANTED, ALL THATS EVER IN MY HEAD!
i promise you ill try my very best so you depend, we can live a life instead.

The Moon Is Telling Stories (moon II)

produced by branwen

completely non profit

lyrics

turn it up turn it up for another night
getting drunk on a sunday till the morning light
waking up in a monday in a strangers bed
i think i finished all my drinks theyre in my fuckin head

holy shit here i go again
i been off my meds for a while
n im a god again
i dont really know who i am
n im alright with it
at least im being honest
if it hurts then u dont feel regret

ur head will hurt in the morning
u dont give a fuck
shes kinda cute might as well go n try ur luck
she thought that i was 25 holy wtf
so this wont go past tonight idgaf

19 i make connections when in drunk until i break them when im sober
in my heart im older
i bleed from underneath the scotch tape thats holding me together
its forever

why waste my time writing all these fucking metaphors
im still in love with the person that i met before
gave her my heart n she threw it on the fucking floor
i find it hard just to trust cus in the end
fucked my best friend
said she wishing i was dead
u live in my head
both u n him
and its such a mess 
that u have left
that u have left
that u have left

(hero)

i find it funny how we repeat such a cycle here again
shits so toxic its obnoxious she refuse to leave my head
and im okay with that, as okay with being sliced in half
"i got a thing for artists" oh i want ur take on that
chugging octane to experience a numbness when she on me
stop me, id like to see u try oh u could never
sulfate to really rub the cut into my skin
with scotch tape to wrap the fatal wound once again

scotchtape & sulfates ft. hero (branwen)

produced by caves.

metallic taste in my mouth
bloodshot eyes and im out
i dont know my route
i dont know my route
i dont know my route..
live, endeavor
☆
old news that i already know
pissed off and i cant get old
what do i have to say?
(could i ever?)
(could i ever?)
(one missed call)
(two missed calls)
☆
and who am i right now..?
MY BODYS TELLING ME 
SOMETHING
SOMETHING
SOMETHING
RIGHT NOW
"I NEED TO GET OUT, NEED TO GET AWAY"
to find contrast
in my life
or all this will be nothing
(nothing)
yeah, it'll be nothing.
☆
IM EITHER FIGHTING OR BREAKING
IM EITHER FIGHTING OR BREAKING
FOR ALL MY LIFE
I SCRAPE ANY HOPE
OFF MY BEDROOM FLOOR
and if i cannot find it,
I'LL LEAVE ANYWAY
☆
a hurricanes coming thru and
it kinda reminds me of you
kinda reminds me of you..
have you ever, have you ever,
been alone like that?
and all this time i finally need to matter

live, endeavor.

cutdeep & epitomeoffailure - i didn't deserve this (caps ctrl)

prod. 2001

shoutout the homie skrwd <3

woah
in the silence i will drown
tonight 

i wish i knew it all before
how much it would’ve hurt when i hit the floor
but knowing me i would’ve just ignored 
everything the signs were pointing towards
i search around but i’m abandoned
everyone is gone and i don’t understand it 
i wasn’t needed around 
guess i’ll shut myself out
in the silence i’ll drown

in the silence i’ll drown tonight 
no one can save my life (save my life)
all i needed was a friend 
to come and pull me out of the quicksand 

SKRWD:

its been a while and i still feel abandoned
it comes to mind all the time, i cant stand it
every night i lie awake to reminders of the sound
maybe i wont feel a thing on the way down 
i dont get it
you never meant it
so whyd you wanna be the one who said it?
i dont get it
i dont get it
why say it if you never meant it?


i wish i knew it all before
how much it would’ve hurt when i hit the floor
but knowing me i would’ve just ignored 
everything the signs were pointing towards
i search around but i’m abandoned
everyone is gone and i don’t understand it 
i wasn’t needed around 
guess i’ll shut myself out
in the silence i’ll drown

(in the silence i’ll drown tonight no one can save my life)

in the silence i’ll drown w/ skrwd (2001)

ｉｆ　ｔｈｅ　ｔｒｕｔｈ　ｗｏｎ＇ｔ　ｓｅｌｌ，　ｋｅｅｐ　ｏｎ　ｂａｒｇａｉｎｉｎｇ

thank you so much for listening.

prod. farber x @jang0x
(additional piano implemented by me)

another day wasted, sitting in my room
i sleep through the dread
i skip through the news
i bet when i wake that nothing is new..
but i can dream, oh can't i?
what's wrong with the sky
it left me behind
now i don't go outside
why won't you ever ask why
the day is faster than the night
(let me go, the night, let me die)

i cannot leave when the ground has been holding me
weep and repeat, cause the cycle has grown on me
you'll brush it off, "oh he's spittin some poetry"
but really i'm trying my best so you'll notice me
i ain't been up on my luck in a minute
it must be my fault that my health has diminished
but i'll fight my way through this shit to the finish
cause i'm all i got, and it's all i was given
i wish they saw what i see on the daily
but i no longer desire a saving
i've learnt a lot, but i still fuck it over (i always fuck it up)
birds feeding out of my chest while i smolder

i watch them fly away
my intestines in their veins
i'm in an empty space
in a stagnant state

this moment's passing me by
but just whose fault is it this time?
with wings made of sludge
blue is more than just the color it's made out to be
what chilled lips to cave into the temptation of frost
if the truth won't sell, keep on bargaining.
having the upper-hand doesn't determine how many fingers it's broken
but you can assume a lot, right?..
RIGHT?
-
another day wasted, sitting in my room
i sleep through the dread
i skip through the news
i bet when i wake that nothing is new..
but i can dream, oh can't i?
what's wrong with the sky
it left me behind
now i don't go outside
why won't you ever ask why
the day is faster than the night
(let me go, the night, let me die)

with wings to fly [prod. farber x jang0]

[+ Tosha]

1st - @user-411557229 
2nd - @northshoremusic 
3rd - @emptychest 
4th - @torvamia 
5th - @strivemusicau 
6th - @caspywaspy 
7th - @soulfadexo 
8th - @x1fern 
9th - @noxious-nights 
10th - @navyxower 
11th - @shizukesaaa 
12th - @hoeplessboy

Holding Onto Something [+ Tosha x Kev]

my personal favorite
produced by my friend @everythingmackk
<3

lyrics:
it started then
n now we’re here again
dont want a friend
we cant be close again
lets not pretend
dont wanna go thru that again

with all the time passed,
nothin rly changes anymore
now i digress;
leaving what i’ve got before its more
i need to find that
i cant see the sunlight thru the storm
u know no matter the weather
im always back to that letter

i gotta find me
i don’t know the person i’ve become
i see the lightning
striking while ur finding other love
i haven’t felt like this in a long time
i don’t exist in ur life while u haunt mine

breathing is slow,
winter is cold
say idk i don’t like that
what do u know
making our bones
told u that i couldn’t fight back
& every time we drove past thru Verona
the cold summer snow was reflecting ur aura
she said to take it outta me
the words i never said
so i went thru our dichotomy
& struck a nerve again
maybe it was fuckin cowardly
to sit where u had spent
but the wage i work is hourly
& u live in my head
right, you live in my
head on backwards
the lanes mix up
& the game’s unmastered
hey the plans break up
but we can make up
all the facial expressions
were never enough
to show u

with all the time passed,
nothin rly changes anymore
now i digress;
leaving what i’ve got before its more
i need to find that
i cant see the sunlight thru the storm
u know no matter the weather
im always back to that letter

i gotta find me
i don’t know the person i’ve become
i see the lightning
striking while ur finding other love
i haven’t felt like this in a long time
i don’t exist in ur life while u haunt mine

learning to lose

i might be invisible [mackk]

spotify & apple music!

@strivemusicau
@shizukesaaa
@autumndropsdead
@torvamia

(strivesad)
Caught in a cage with this endless pain
caught up to my age now I’m getting paid
Depression stays high and now the feelings changed
pour another bottle all apon my grave

you’ve been building roads
I’m building settlements

I keep craving another fucking serotonin hit
let’s flip the script

I don’t need no alliby
come with me and stay the night
Fighting for my life I think I’m doing fine

Ripped clothes now I’m going home
got these problems cause I feel alone
keep me in my zone

(shizu)
beamer swerving 
cuz i deserve the worst shit
bet she gon hit me up w/ 'love u but this isnt working'
might fuck around my blade till i negate the serotonin
now watch the liquid dripping red off slitted wrists, still frozen
find another guy and leave me dying w/ no notice
no i was never that man but fans in my dms saying im chosen
it gets hard to speak every want when everyone is seeing you choking
when words go wasting the space of audio waves to leaving me broken"

(autie)
my conscious is ever so heavy
i've been so cautious ever since you left
i've been holding myself down, with this self doubt
but nevertheless
i swear that i'll know when you need me
you know i'm right there when you're hearing that ringing
i'm patient a bit, but waiting's a bitch
i wish i could split and fuck up my breathing
but if there's anyone out there like me
smite like a god do and make me undying
bottle my goods for a world that is dying
plenish a helt that is tattered with lies
'cause i see through them every single minute
proof is in my dome, that's why i'm livid
tell me that you love him 'till i'm finished
i repel and let them be forgiven

(torva)
smoke until my chest hurts, til my lungs burn
think ill die soon, think ill go first
now my head hurts, never heard worse
if i lose you, need a gold hearse

never fuck it up, bitch i run it up
i go fucking crazy
til i do enough
keep my tommy tucked, never losing love
think i need some help
fore' i lose my trust

Cage w/ strivesad, shizukesa, autumndropsdead & torva [+ Tied For Silver x flesh]

cover of jude's (sleepwater) "nervous"
guitar by caves
reprod by me

miss you bro :(
don't wait on me now

in the silence i’ll drown w/ skrwd (2001)

epitomeoffailure (hiatus)

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