Currently crying to this song, so thank you for the comfort music Ally <3

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA@AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA@AAAAAAAAAAA

this a melodic fukcing hypnotic ♥️♥️♥️

its not personal, its strictly business
prod. @jolst @irby314

im drunk again
i miss your face
just wish that i 
could replace 
the memories 
that are haunting me 
i miss the simple pleasantries
like sitting with you
staring at the sea 
this sullen panic
slowly surrounds me 

you dont know
you dont know
wat you're doing to me
you dont know 
you dont know 

you never loved me and it shows
it hurts me more than u could ever know
that im not the one you chose...

i wake up, 4 am
staring at the clock
wishing that i was him 
u dont know what your doing to me
baby
thought you were the best
rip my heart 
out of my chest 
i know that you 
would do it all again

i know that youd do it all again
but lets be real 
you're proabably better off with him
you're probably better off with him

you're probably better off...

im drunk again
miss your face
just wish that i
was what you wanted...

Spotify

better off [+irby & jolst]

you said you didnt want no one
now youre boo'd up and im still fucking stuck alone
i said ill never talk to anyone again
but thats a lie and we both know what i meant
we both know what i meant, it was honorific 
we both know what you meant when you said that
im tired of dealing with this shit
i always fucking loved you even after every hit
i was fucking bad, now im worse
atleast when i was bad i had someone to text first
i guess we had fun but thats it
i still have your note on my wall and it hurts my heart
yeah it hurts my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah it hurts my heart
i dont have nothing going for me
maybe music, but thats not gonna heal me
im screaming out and i want someone to hear me
i think its impossible to find someone who feels me
i dont ask for much.
just to be hugged, just to be loved for once
i dont ask for much, just to be loved, fucked for once
i dont ask for much, just to feel someone touch on my skin
i dont ask for much, i just wanna experience love like everyone does
i dont ask for much, i just wanna feel safe in somebodys arms
someone to keep me outta dodge
someone who can keep me alive in the dark
someone i can rely on
someone who wont leave me for a boy thats -
wrong.
im only here cause i love you
i met you for a reason now i need you
i dont wanna get attached
but i love you

you said you didnt want no one
now youre boo'd up and im still fucking stuck alone
i said ill never talk to anyone again
but thats a lie and we both know what i meant
we both know what i meant, it was honorific 
we both know what you meant when you said that
im tired of dealing with your shit
i always fucking loved you even after every hit.
i was fucking bad, now im worse
atleast when i was bad i had someone to text first
i guess we had fun but thats it
i still have your note on my wall and it hurts my heart
yeah it hurts my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah it hurts my heart
yeah it hurts my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah you hurt my heart
yeah you own my heart..

alive in the dark (afterlife x pekarot)

produced by killedmyself

completely non profit 

lyrics

stary nights without the complexes
walking bout the mountains tryna fill up all our pockets
with cigarette butts 
crave a nicotine buzz
wasnt on no bud
just dumb tryna prove my love
i was feeling quite a misfit
what a bitch

ur life is over just as its begun
she found the sun inside anothers arms
and to a brother that had sworn no harm
i think ill stay inside long until the weathers calm
she got a humble cause
tearing u in half
tryna mend ur heart
she wanna leave some scars
head
whats going on in ur head babe
eyes are feeling like an xray
honestly i think im too dazed
feeling like its been 2 days
caught up in all of my blue days
that is not worthy of news page
so how r u liking my new face
ripped the skin off of my mainframe
rolled it around in an ashtray
stapled it back onto my veins

its alright
its alright
its alright
its alright

stary nights without the complexes
walking bout the mountains tryna fill up all our pockets
with cigarette butts 
crave a nicotine buzz
wasnt on no bud
just dumb tryna prove my love
i was feeling quite a misfit
what a bitch

poetry from a diary i found buried by my headstone (killedmyself)

hope you guys enjoy this one <3 each track i put out means a whole lot 2 me, 
so tysm for taking the time out of your day to listen

prod. by @sorrow_bringer 🖤
cover art done by an acquaintance of mine

(got me asking my lungs)
("can you cave in?")
(in need of a reason for clearing my head)

it'll probably subside, on the dime
she lied; so did i
feel like a gorilla, i'm beating my chest
rope in my hands, why's it not round' my neck?

leaving, breathing; shit's all the same
feeding heathens; outta my brain
they want me to come to an end
this city is playin' pretend (playin' pretend)

heart's beating, now i'm way heated
took off and ran on my own
asking my past demons, "did i really mean it?"
was i in control of my soul?
now i gotta wait. 
i know what i am; shit wasn't great
so why do i stand?
never complained; wished that i did
they'll get what they get
i'm not giving in

they all wanna see me fall, hear me bawl
i know i shouldn't have set foot
into the cage that i'm in
the person i was; he told me to stay where i must
oh the ground personifies
we walk all about it and never bat an eye

let me loathe (let me loathe)
swear i'm changing..
this feeling i know
lessened the seasons

it'll probably subside, on the dime
she lied; so did i
feel like a gorilla, i'm beating my chest
rope in my hands, why's it not round' my neck?

leaving, breathing; shit's all the same
feeding heathens; outta my brain
they want me to come to an end
this city is playin' pretend (playin' pretend)

subside [prod. sorrow bringer]

originally performed by sewerperson
produced by mags
completely non profit

k_ (mags)

second single off album w/ @flesh golem
mix & mastr @fleshgolem

lyrics

it feels safe here 
layered warmth
with my skin on ur skin 
something forms
there lays pain here 
and till im forty i wont ever take for granted what was alleviated 
im all urs

im all urs x4

what is left 
is all urs 
rotten flesh 
in my pours

opening up
ive been trying
speed not what she used to yeah and no she cryin 

i been mixing it up 
i been frying 
breathing in these particles 
my flesh been dying

throwing up 
on the phone 
outta touch
but right at home 

right at home x4

oh my word
every single day 
every single day that goes by x2

be safe, for me

be safe; for me (flesh x pekarot)

helloooo prod me hope u like :)

lyrics:
everybody wanna claim that they know but they don't
so i just pay no mind
everybody wanna say they're in love
but they don't have a clue what that's like
i'm just tryna find a way i can cope
take the blade
take the rope
take the dive
everybody wanna say they're alone 
til they are and they know what my life's like

i look in the mirror only feeling i get is disgust
i don't think i'll ever be somebody anyone can trust
i don't think i'll ever find somebody i can love
take another piece of me
i know you're eating me alive
have some decency
god dammit
this isn't how i planned it
tell me something new
tell me i'm being dramatic
i dare you

maybe i
was in the wrong the other time
but i can't decide
if i should go on with my life
or if i should mourn love lost
but i cannot bear that cost
guess that i am scared to fall in love another time
but with you maybe i will have to try
i'm aware that i am a victim of my pride
but with you i feel like i'll never die

i look in the mirror only feeling i get is disgust
i don't think i'll ever be somebody anyone can trust
i don't think i'll ever find somebody i can love
take another piece of me
i know you're eating me alive
have some decency
god dammit
this isn't how i planned it
tell me something new
tell me i'm being dramatic
i dare you

somebody, anybody

NOOKING

whatuwant

Hurting,

Can you feel the pain, I feel tonight,
look me deep within the eyes,
can tell that I don't live my life, so,

Tired,

Of these games that we play,
you've thrown me into my grave,
it's like you never even cared at all,

there's scars all over my hands,
and burn holes from cigarrettes,
at least I'm numb, of regrets,

Take my life, but it's not my time no,
knife in the back, and a slit down my throat,
would you even care no, never really cared yah,
would you even care girl, never really cared yah.

Tried my best, I can't help your sickness,
lost in my head, will I overcome this,
would you even care no, never really cared yah,
would you even care girl, never really cared yah.

(My lyrics)

Into My Grave (feat. Skele)

Candle ft. lil skele (prod. Guitarboi)

produced by: malith 
everything else by: me 
this may be the most mid song of 2020

lyrics:

and fuck everything that I wrote down,
all these dark clouds, cant go back to you now
and I feel a lil sad so I ball out
and this hole I'm in's too deep yeah, I cant crawl out
x2

and you make me feel so alive
maybe one day ill get to call you mine
x2

(and I guess its just my turn,
like everybody else had one,
I guess ill never learn,
ill never learn to hold my tongue, 
im not what you deserve,
I won't put myself first,
ive gotta kick you to the curb,
then my heart it gets sewed back on

and fuck everything that I wrote down,
all these dark clouds, cant go back to you now
and I feel a lil sad so I ball out
and this hole I'm in's too deep yeah, I cant crawl out
x2

alive in the dark (afterlife x pekarot)

emptychest

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