Sparkle Brain

Soothing and Emotional Self-care

OR Building friendships worth growing for a lifetime.


In this podcast I go over the three essential ingredients to good friendship so that you can train yourself to choose great ones. I also cover nine general rules for being a great friend to yourself and others – as well as ways to find friends that are perfect for you. So if you are looking to make new and better friendships that you can invest in for a lifetime, this is a podcast for you.

This is for Catherine – (thanks girl!) She wrote, “Can you talk about what it means to be a good friend – and ways to practice that.” Catherine - I know your question was more general than the topic above. I chose to take this angle because I think it’s a good way to force yourself to choose better relationships, despite your conditioned-in blinders. 

Just like with anything else – a job, a marriage, or anything really, we bring our old rusty eyeballs into a relationship – and often we can’t tell how we are being blinded by those issues and experiences.  Sometimes they can compromise our ability to choose the right people for the right reasons, or give and to receive the fruits of friendship.  In other words, they get in the way of smart and self-loving decision-making.  So I am going to present this to you in a way that hopefully will allow you to approach friendship from an intentional perspective so that you can build mutually beneficial and powerful friendships that bring value to your life and the others who are out there right now, in need of a friend like you.

If you likee, check out the Teaspoon for more of my writing- as well as my books. And if you prefer to read, this will be posted as a blog later on this week. Smile peeps! xox Sarah May b.

http://www.teaspoonofhappy.com


Episode 27: Nine Tools to Build Successful Friendships

Does your brain start chattering and seemingly never stop?  Do you feel distracted and unable to focus?  This is for anyone who is trapped in chronic thinking. Like your brain won’t seem to shut up and it’s getting a bit noisy up there. I will cover the what, the why, and most importantly, the solution. There are about 10 different super silly tools to get you started. And apologies in advance - I also drop the F-bomb. (Just once!)

This is for Cindy – and it’s a great topic. Thanks for suggesting this girl!

Check out TeaspoonOfHappy.com for the blog post with all my references and research  -it will be live later this week. Smile peeps! xox Sarah-May B.

Episode 29: How to Stop Thinking So Much - Tools for Chronic Overthinking

Hi my friends! Today’s podcast is about “badges” – or external factors that somehow take on supreme meaning in your life and dictate your self-worth – to you.  Whether it’s a job, a number on the scale, a trophy or an expensive car – a badge can affect you so deeply that your whole world changes in the blink of an eye, almost like a hallucination.  You might have experienced the results of wearing your badges when you’re either on a personal high or low – and the difference between the two worlds is vast and disorienting, despite how small the factors are when put in perspective. 

For example – let’s say you get an accolade at work: you feel like you’re a star, you’re so powerful and confident, you don’t need anyone! You don’t even need to call people back! You are that worth knowing, and everyone loves you.  Maybe you more freely spend money because you’re going places! You look better in the mirror, you feel young, successful, sexy… “Man I impress everyone!” 

The flip side of that coin is pretty dark: when you feel you have failed at something or lack something meaningful. For example, maybe you met someone you liked and texted them, but never got a text back. Suddenly the same you will feel ugly, fat, clumsy, talentless, incapable, and perceive that everyone around you sees you as an imbecile.  Suddenly this hallucination changes your interpretation of everything anyone says to you:  you question whether or not your friends like you, whether or not you are smart, and even how you see your reflection.  From this state of mind, you see your acne as horrendous! “How does anyone like me, at all?”  

And all of this happens in a split second: with one tiny bit of information, your view of yourself and your life - changes. That’s how powerful these external badges can be, and that is not how they should be.  Because that is very unfair to you, to be owned by something so dumb – and it’s making you miss out on the real goods you might experience – you’re focusing on the wrong thing if you want to really understand and appreciate who you are.  Which is great, and a gift of a person to know. 

So if you’re in a place where you feel bad about yourself based on an external definition – so much so that it has taken control of the opinion you hold about yourself– this is a podcast for you.  Perhaps even listen to it twice, because if this is happening to you – this can be untrained just like any other bad habit.  And you deserve for it to stop – cause you’re awesome!

For the blog version, check out TeaspoonOfHappy.com later this week, and as always, smile peeps!! xox Sarah-May B. 


Episode 36: The Badges That Define You and Dictate Your Self-Worth

This is a short-ish mindfulness meditation for you to do while sitting just about anywhere. It's a manual-brain-shut-down button for anyone who has incessant, non-stop thoughts that never seem to quiet down. That's a sign that there has been some imbalance created in you brain based on your lifestyle. To remedy it, I recco starting a daily meditation practice. This is one of those meditations (if you like it, that is.) 

To listen to it, find somewhere you can be alone and uninterrupted for at least half an hour - somewhere you are comfortable. It's under 15 minutes and should be completed in one sitting.  If you like it, let me know and I'll make more! 

For more of my writing you can head to TeaspoonOfHappy.com
Smile lovely friends! xox


Brain Chatter Relief: A Daily Quieting Meditation

Speakers: Joanne Pham & Sue Zimmerman Soucy

http://buildingabrandonline.com/superwomansheena/positive-mindset-change-it-in-6-steps/

Success begins with the RIGHT MINDSET!

You can have the best education, the greatest opportunities, and the top mentors, but until you master your mind, you will always be missing the key.

Listen in to Joanne and Sue Zimmerman Soucy on the SuperWomen Daily Teleseminar as we show you HOW to change it with 6 easy steps!


Positive Mindset, Change it in 6 Steps

Hi peeps! This is an episode with a short meditation in part 3. It covers why soothing your body and reducing the chatter in your brain is the key to your ultimate happiness.

As a society we tend to get hyper focused. We get into the groove of our job or our relationships – and we get stressed by how many things there are to worry about. Am I doing well as a person? Am I successful?” When will I get to the right level? How can I be more of what I want to be? Suddenly we’re looking straight down at our feet and trying to take bigger steps instead of keeping our eyes to the beautiful sunrise on the horizon.

This is almost like an introduction to my podcast in that it is truly the KEY to every positive change you want to make in your life. It is also the key to happiness and also the key to finding your life’s purpose. 

What is it? Ready? Listen intently. 

Consciousness: Feeling the feelings that are going through your body as they come. Being fully connected to that awareness and not “occupied” be a roaring sea of thoughts or rapid firing fears and analysis.  Sometimes it’s like facing a roaring lion because some terrible awful stuff lives inside us in many moments of our life.  Feeling hopeless, or worthless or afraid of what if’s to come. And yet, we must allow ourselves to feel those things - it's the key to building your ultimate life.

This is an episode with three parts. The general what, why, and then as a tool, I end with a meditation. 

Check out TeaspoonOfHappy.com later this week for the blog version of this post and I hope you enjoy this! Smile lovelies! xox
Sarah-May



Episode 58: The Importance of Being Present

Hi friends, this is an emotional cleansing power up episode for clearing sorrow and stress and emotional muck. 

It's best to listen to it while you take a short walk outside. It’s a visualization meditation of sorts, one you can do with your eyes open.  If you can’t do this while walking, I recco you do this while in a yoga inversion of some sort. It focuses on calming your nervous system with breathing exercises, and its one I do myself - quite often. I hope you like! xox Sarah May B.


Emotional Heaviness: Releasing Sorrow, Stress and Emotional Muck

Are you guided by a belief that something is wrong with you? That you’re not good enough, and that you are fooling everyone – pretending you’re like them, but soon enough they’re going to realize you’re not talented, cool or smart. Maybe you constantly strive to build the life of someone worthy, but always seem to feel just as worthless as before: you’re never thin enough, you’re not as successful as you’d like to be, or maybe you’re living a life that you know you don’t want but you’re too afraid to do anything about it because it’s going to show the world that you’re a weak and shameful loser. So it’s better to just stay safe, and protected in the lie. Even though you feel suffocated and stifled by this life. Well if this sounds like you then you’re in good company – this is a universal human trait: to feel that we’re not good enough. And that’s because so much of the self is defined by things we learn from others. The brain we use to drive and make money is also the brain that computes risk based on a very specific structure we’ve built via our life experiences. So it’s natural to have grown up with a set of beliefs that are – to say the least – not in favor of your confidence and self-love. 

So if this sounds like you I hope to offer you some relief in the form of understanding, plus a few tools to manage the affects. 

As usual there are 3 parts: the what, the why, and the how: the tools. This one is for Guy. 


Ep 67: Living As A Fraud: When you have a voice in your head that tells you you’re not good enough

This is a power-up episode for anyone facing change that feels too hard or too painful. Take heart and remind yourself that you will do what you need to do when you're ready and in your own time. xo!
Sarah May B.

A Grounding Talk for Confronting What Feels Impossible

A practice of getting closer to your original self. Analysis, ambivalence, endless "stuff." Checking, pursuing, not knowing if any of it is right. When will I finally be happy? When I finish this thing? But then there’s that other thing I have to do. Hi friends! This power-up is a set of tools all about trimming out the mental work we create for ourselves and getting closer to your playful, original self. That mental work that seems to go in circles. In favor of something deeper and possibly more rewarding. For more personal play and exploration - here are a few books I enjoyed. xo

Jung on dream analysis
http://amzn.to/2rOrX3U

Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu
http://amzn.to/2s7gwSe

Bodhisattva mind
http://amzn.to/2quH3aQ

Help Me Be Me • Power-Ups

Brain Clutter: Creating Mental and Spiritual Space for Yourself

When we don’t feel safe, we tend to panic. Especially if you lack the innate knowledge that you will be okay. So when external events happen that take our sense of safety away – it can lead you into a state of intense suffering that then deepens into a state of hopelessness. This is when external hardship is really damaging. However – you can foster an innate sense of resilience – by practicing steps and thoughts despite yourself. So if you are in that state, of if you want to preempt it – here are some steps for you to take.

If you want to read more of my writing, to make a donation, and for more helpful resources, check out YayWithMe.com

Help Me Be Me

Ep 98: Resilience for Codependents and Those Experiencing Adult Hardships

A shorthand version of changing a trauma or hurt from a scar into a medal. I’ve covered this in other episodes but I thought it would be helpful in this format - it's condensed for in-the-moment application. I used these steps myself recently and it works!

So this is if anyone has had something really traumatic happen to them that hurts them and you can tell it’s one of those sore spots that makes you cry really hard.  I want you to practice these steps around that experience as soon as it has happened. It will likely have to do with your powerlessness in the face of something excruciating – and your inability to change that. 

For more of my work including the blog version of this podcast, head to YayWithMe.com 

To donate head to Yaywithme.com/donate

Healing a Possibly Scarring Experience Into a Resilience Booster

It’s time to remember now, that you my dear one, were born worthy. I know you have been taught to search for this worth, taught to find ways to prove your value, find ways to be so that you are given, but dearest love, this was an accident…a teaching that was instilled in us, by those lost to their beauty and given worth as well.

S03 LIVEAWAKE

S03 REMEMBERING YOUR WORTH

This is about when life becomes unmanageable – for example there’s a condition that threatens your sanity and it gets to the point that you are in serious discomfort. This is when you are feeling hopeless and overwhelmed and in a state of action-paralysis. When you don’t know how to help yourself, you are in a state of fretting. Feeling overwhelmed and unable to think past how bad things are. So if you are in that state – feeling dread and hopelessness, this is for you. 

Hopefully the short increment will allow it to be applicable to you in those moments – so first things first. I want you to grab a paper and a pen. From this moment right now, you cannot see the solution but no matter how bad things are or have been for a long time – something that will help – exists. Part of the paralysis is believing in the sense of hopelessness because when actions don’t impact your outcome repeatedly, we learn to believe it. We believe it’s hopeless until it’s not. The trick is to take the pain ONE notch down from what you’re in now.

When it comes to really dire, hopeless situations – chronic ones, you need dramatic big change. More than a simple tweak. More than a podcast. You need a big leap. You can’t do this all on your own – you need to involve reinforcements. 

Today’s podcast is dedicated to Catherine. Catherine your donation has literally changed my life – I hope I am able to repay you in some small way.

For more of my work or to make a donation, visit YayWithMe.com xo Sarah May B.

My Life Hurts: When A Problem is Really, Really Bad

Help Me Be Me is an emotional toolkit for creating positive change in yourself. I like to think of it as self-help for people who hate self-help. I'm Sarah May, coach/mom/all-around happy person, and these are the tools that work for me in my life. For all of my offerings you can check out YayWithMe.com What I share is my personal opinion. It's not a diagnosis for treatment or a substitute for professional help. If you're suffering, please reach out to your local emergency services or call 9-1-1. Music theme created by www.BookerHillMusic.com