'next to u' produced by heylog

lyrics:
𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘪 𝘸𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴,
𝘪 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵

𝘥𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶?

u make it so hard to live
i feel like i'm in hell
my parents ain't raise no kid
who'll just end up killing himself
i could shut down
and no one will ever find me
i could lie down
and see u there next to me

i need u to focus
i'm crying, i'm broken
but no one really cares how i'm feeling so hopeless
i hate ur guts
and i hate ur friends
i realized u all suck
so i'll just cut u instead
now i think of u less
cus i thought highly of you
so i distanced away
to try something new
i'm steady being myself
something you'd never do
but i still wish u the best
even though i still hate you

YOU TEXTED ME
I'M NOT SURE WHAT TO SAY
I'LL RESPOND IN A WEEK
MAYBE 2, MAYBE 3
AVOIDING US AND MOVE ON
THOUGH I STILL WRITE YOU IN SONGS
IT'S THE EMOTIONS YOU HOLD
THAT NEVER FEELS WRONG
GOD I'M SO DISAPPOINTED AT EVERYTHING THAT I DO
I'LL PLAY SOME GUITAR, RECORD A COUPLE OF LOOPS
BUT IT AIN'T MET WITH MY STANDARDS
SO I START SOMETHING NEW
AT LEAST I PUT IN SOME WORK
WHICH YOU'LL NEVER DO
TAKIN PICS OF THE WALL
ADD A PLANT AND A BOOK
WRITE A VERSE AND A BRIDGE
CUS I AIN'T GOOD WITH NO HOOK
I KEEP REPEATING MYSELF
AM I SPEAKING TOO MUCH?
I'M NOT A PERSON WHO TALKS
SO I'LL JUST CHILL IN THE BACK AND WATCH