time

O Encontro

https://ifidieinmississippi.bandcamp.com/album/sweetheart

the last time i saw you

https://ifidieinmississippi.bandcamp.com/album/artless

artless

this could be us but u playin'

baby wants to fight
always wearing black
mommys not alright
never coming back
i like the way you pull your face
it tears in two the metal taste and
i will make you feel completely
ravaged, ruined underneath me
i am burning up
watch the smoke come out
cook until it's tough
open up your mouth
you bite too hard your teeth are crooked
blood and spit misunderstood
ill pull your collar lead you there
it is heaven please just dont be
scared  of his face
hear  what ive seen
stand  in his place
rot  flesh like me

pic by rob
http://oldcondom.tumblr.com/

self

mind trapped in flesh
feel my distress
i cant hear you
i cant heal you

see me in dreams
its not the real me
waking up to nothing

open his eyes and hes smaller than anything hes ever known
floating in nothingness running from everything hes ever known
rip him away from the boy in the mirror he wants to be known
holding his insides they spill out so easy dont want them to go

holding softly
lose my senses
feels exhausting
conscious ended

slow decay 
this skin will change
but mind the same
as always

open her eyes and shes smaller than anything shes ever known
floating in nothingness running from everything shes ever known
rip her away from the girl in the mirror she wants to be known
holding her insides they spill out so easy dont want them to go

it unfolds

plea-s

i feel like i dont need anyone
but i still need you
you say enjoy what they have given
but the mask is different

they are making me to do this
im nothing
hurt me till i will
become something

this is it

comforting skin next to me
she said that i can never be
myself when i die i will be alone
listening to her heart i can't feel anything
below my neck, and now my thoughts will take control
and if u prefer
i'll leave out all the details of this emptiness i feel
and if u prefer
i'll be around to listen to your softly spoken words
darkness seems to make isolation easier
i welcome my hallucinations
understandings of what i am will come undone
as i spiral deeper into nothingness
but if it helps me sleep
i'll take out my frustration on my temporary skin
if it helps me sleep
i'll smoke until i never have another dream of you
being in this space where nothing stays the same
i feel this biting clawing pain inside my chest
fly against the window pane soon to die
why does he try
why try

swallow

passing memories 
as my life falls apart 
and i cant pick up 
the pieces of my mind 
alone again 
its cold all the time 
stuck in bed 
why even try

stuck

frail is how I see me
giving up on changing is ending me
feeling like I can’t feel
just another symptom you can’t heal

find nothing in everything 
mend my brain don’t want to break again
i can make you crave to be
someone that you’re really afraid to see

ignoring that corner inside of my
mind
tried to make sense of the patterns
im wrong
dream of a beauty in being so 
dull
disordered condition of living 
done choice

heart pounding why not be
learn to swim inside the dark abyss
you can make me so weak
use me like you used to when im sick

ignoring that corner inside of my
hell
tried to make sense of the patterns
they’re gone
dream of a beauty in being so 
numb
disordered condition of dying 
done choice

swallow

hysterla