https://hysterla.bandcamp.com/

another compilaton of songs from the past year, written and recorded in my bedroom to varying levels of production due to me learning new stuff with every song i write. 

album cover photography by pitychild (edit by me), listen to his music please, he's amazing!
soundcloud.com/pitychild and also
soundcloud.com/zacryt

there is no empty space

your bones brittle and
your skin covered in marks
control everything
cause i wanna take my time
you're my favorite
person to talk to when i wanna die
when im high with you
all i wanna do is kiss you
sober dreaming
isnt what im feeling now
now things are different
they're always changing when you get so bored
this is the last time
ill think of wanting to call you mine
ill wait for nothing
while you wait for me to come around
he'll change his mind
like every time he did before

pic by rob
http://oldcondom.tumblr.com/

u made me so tired

this time is different
i feel different
lost under tension
fateful companion
your skin is frozen
my wounds closing
you overestimate
the ones you love the steps you take
i want us to be best friends but
maybe baby i cant pretend
when im asleep
is when you call me
don't talk too deep
we'll be sorry
find hope in nothing
we are nothing
i want us to be until the end
maybe baby i cant pretend

the pictures on my phone are all of you

baby wants to fight
always wearing black
mommys not alright
never coming back
i like the way you pull your face
it tears in two the metal taste and
i will make you feel completely
ravaged, ruined underneath me
i am burning up
watch the smoke come out
cook until it's tough
open up your mouth
you bite too hard your teeth are crooked
blood and spit misunderstood
ill pull your collar lead you there
it is heaven please just dont be
scared  of his face
hear  what ive seen
stand  in his place
rot  flesh like me

pic by rob
http://oldcondom.tumblr.com/

self

mind trapped in flesh
feel my distress
i cant hear you
i cant heal you

see me in dreams
its not the real me
waking up to nothing

open his eyes and hes smaller than anything hes ever known
floating in nothingness running from everything hes ever known
rip him away from the boy in the mirror he wants to be known
holding his insides they spill out so easy dont want them to go

holding softly
lose my senses
feels exhausting
conscious ended

slow decay 
this skin will change
but mind the same
as always

open her eyes and shes smaller than anything shes ever known
floating in nothingness running from everything shes ever known
rip her away from the girl in the mirror she wants to be known
holding her insides they spill out so easy dont want them to go

it unfolds

i am just a process
no more man than i
feel too much to process
i feel it in my eye

i believe in something
i believe in no
thing i believe in makes
sense to me any more

they all play the game
i wont play the same

biting at my tongue
i want to understand
why this happens to me
the pain is in my head

i dont know his name
he drowned in the rain
asking if he's sane
ripping off his face