Soft As Chalk (Joanna Newsom cover)

no rhyme end song

cynically sound

wrung out

forgive me father i have sinned
its been 2 years since my last album
every song I’ve written since
have been about not writing   i won’t
bore you with the details
i will spare you all the gore
please dont pick my brain for reasons 
why i haven’t written more

i was once a young musician   only 16  full of spark
with promising ambition  i  made  a lot of art
i wore my guitar on my back  no matter where i’d go i took it with
i wrote so many songs and didn’t care that they were mostly shit
in the years since i have wondered , what exactly caused the change
cus at some point in adulthood    writing turned into a pain
now i pick my words with caution ,  i am scared of every verse
perfectionism haunts me with its unproductive curse

i was once a  smaller being  truly hopeful to a fault
i was freshly turned adult yet  still a child inside my heart
the way i felt like i was owed something, a life devoid of pain
the same way everything  turns out alright    before the movie ends
i’ve learned that life  is merely life   just random acts of consequence
i hate to be so cynical  but  thats how i protect myself
from thinking i am owed a good life   just because i was abused
not that i am not, but it is work,   not a decided truth

forgive me father i have sinned
its been 2 years since my last album
every song I’ve written since
have been about not writing   i won’t
bore you with the details
i will spare you all the gore
please dont pick my brain for reasons 
why i haven’t written more

Life Is Merely Life

lyrics:

good damage   is  the damage  that is worthy of me writing about
the baggage i manhandle  until the moral of the story falls out
i need purpose  for the hurting ,  if i can’t undo  whats already been done
i subvert it into learning     to feel like theres a point to it all

theres  damage   i manage    and theres damage that is hard to admit
no lessons   to learn from    nothing i can make of it
but i keep it   tucked tightly   so close  it feels apart of my skin
if i leave it   just slightly   didn’t you get away with it?

so i cannot forgive you
but i can’t surrender the pain 
all there is left for me to do is remember
if i let go , forget it
then did it really happen at all ?
if my damage is just damage
then  how am  i suposed to go on?

i was 13  when i met you   but you said i was mature for my age
i was lonely   and  reclusive     so i was easy to manipulate
you told me  you loved me   and put me thru such horrible shit
how could you want me   when i was just a fucking kid?

so i cannot forgive you
but i can’t surrender the pain 
all there is left for me to do is remember
if i let go , forget it
then did it really happen at all ?
if my damage is just damage
then  how am  i suposed to go on?

Good Damage

Trust In The Process

unfinished, forgotten & scrapped songs, demos & ideas i've decided needed more love than they got when i made them . these are from 2019-2024, & i hope you like them <3

one last time

Uncanny Valley

lyrix:

instead of rooting to get better      i started rooting to stand still
almost in spite of my past self   who thought the answer was a pill
a piece of paper stating something  that i deep down already knew
that i was damaged by my circumstances
damaged thru and thru

what doesn’t kill me makes me worse
it makes me unhappy and jaded
uncontrollably  neurotic   but  emotionally constipated
stuck  in patterns  painted by a family i’m now estranged from
painful as it is  there isn’t anyone  to blame my life on

if i   were to do that  i would have to ignore facts
i would have to look beyond the fact  that my dad too had a dad 
and everything  my parents taught me  was also taught to them by theirs
and on it goes, so on so on,    it makes me painfully  aware

that who i am is predisposed,  decided  by my blood
thats why i know i’ll get addicted if i experiment with drugs
i do my best to be the opposite  of who i might’ve been
if i had followed in the footsteps, never questioning a thing

instead of hoping   to get better  i started hoping to get worse
almost in spite  of every doctor , shrink and condescending nurse
who’d seem delighted  when they’d tell me   there was nothing they could do
what kinda medical professional  are you?

cus i never asked to be a burden   or another stack of forms
is there a place between fake sympathies and being totally ignored?
been in and out the public hospital for almost 7 years or so
too well adjusted  for commitment  but too sick to be let go

so i show up to the sessions   with the kleenex by the chair
and i weekly talk to someone who doesn’t really have to care
it feels pointless , imma lost cause,  but he doesn’t quite agree
maybe he can change my mind, i guess we’ll have to see?

i am mourning  my free will,   that i feel robbed of  in a sense
cus i was put into this world   inside somebody else’s mess
and now i have to  do the work   i really shouldn’t have to do
but i am damaged by my circumstance
damaged thru and thru

Damaged Thru And Thru

Ep 3:8 To me, 'less than the least of all saints, was this grace given to announce to the "Gentiles the unsearchable riches of Christ as the gospel
Ep 3:9 And to enlighten all that they may see what the economy of the mystery is which throughout the ages has been "hidden in God, who created all things,
Ep 3:10 In order that now to the rulers and the authorities in the 'heavenlies the multifarious wisdom of God might be made known through the  church,

Holy Bible Recovery Version.

🌹🎻🎶🌺🌱🌷

Todavía no está en Español… solo es Traducción Provicional..


Ef 3:8 A mí, que soy menos que el más
"pequeño de todos los santos, me fue dada esta gracia de anunciar a los gentiles las
inescrutables riquezas de Cristo como
evangelio,
Ef 3:9 y de alumbrar a todos para que vean cuál es la economía del misterio escondido a lo largo de los siglos en Dios, que creó todas las cosas;
Ef 3:10 a fin de que la multiforme sabiduría de Dios sea ahora dada a conocer por medio de la iglesia a los principados y autoridades en los lugares celestiales.



Santa 
Biblia Versión Recobro

To me less than the least..Ephesians 3:8-11 🌹 A mi que soy menos que el mas pequeño..Efesios 3:8-11

Hello. I am Blood Girl! 
I am a 26 year old creature that sings about sadness and bettering

Good Damage

Blood Girl

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