Call it what you want, I've been stuck I can get out this rut.
Don't duck around, coz, I'll catch you on the other side.
I spend my nights getting high trying not to die.
Girl if you ever loved me, hit me with a reply.
My bad, if I told you that I think there's other guys.
Im insecure, girl, and you're very sneaky.
There's times when I listen, I can't tell what you're meaning-
if you wanna leave me girl then say it you can leave me.

Red flags, everywhere that I look. I won't text back,
look how long that it took. Say that you gon save me baby girl thats understood- (to be finished)

Red Flag ft. romeo! (@goodnight.romeo)

New SoundCloud exclusive “Satisfaction” featuring Re:

Satisfaction (feat. re:) [prod. jolst X Irby]

burning like a star, doomed to die alone

lyrics: 

dont know how to make this right
always feelin' so dead inside
its all i can do not to end this life
yall just fuck me up and leave me here to die
god knows im so sick of cryin
fuck this shit i feel like dyin
dont believe anything they say now
ima light up to relieve this pain now...

dont know why 
i cant face this world
im always starin thru the blinds 
dont hmu im just a waste of time 

dont hmu im just setback
id rather be alone and hit this gas pac
pls dont get to close to me
everyone who does becomes the enemy...

dont talk to me...
if you do youll just want to leave
im backin down i dont want this 
nothing that i do could ever, ever stop this
burning like a star, im doomed to die alone
everybody leaves ive never had a home
just go away, i dont wanna talk now
im perfectly fine being a shadow in the background

oooo a shadow in the background
oooo the sun comes out
i dont make a sound...
i dont make a sound....

shadow in the background [+taurs & jolst]

love is rare

l o v e i s r a r e [Prod. IOF]

~2300~

This song is raw and true to the place I was in mentally when I recorded it. A few months ago I left my long-term relationship as well as my home and first attempt at a better life for myself. I returned to New York and lost myself in substances and self-medication. This song came from an evening of blackout substance abuse which was part of an even longer span of time that I do not recollect. When I found this song in my macbook I felt it would be too personal to ever share publicly but as i've grown and overcame these obstacles I decided it would be a necessary part in the process of healing and moving on. This one is self-produced and I don't remember making any of it. Thanks for sharing this with me.

jumpedtoosoon

u cannot tell me 
different at all
im livin a cycle
i js wanna ball
i dnt wanna fall 
so im tryna crawl
away
☆
been standin still
thats js how them bitches livin
yeh
blacked out
fucked up
in a cold kitchen
yeh
im tryna whip a cayman one day, so
i can give back to my family, hoe
cus they aint deserve that shit
all my family are fake as shit
im gonna be that bitch
im gonna be the shit
even more so
☆
yeh yeh
even more so
hows it feels to have pills in ur torso?
really bad.
when im out of my room doin tours n shit
i rly need my god damn milli back
im use to havin snakes in my friends list
if they hold me close 
imma hold em closer
godspeed
i dont want that to be likely
but if a bitch try me one more time 
they gon have to fuckin fight me
☆
im growing up
unlike u 
ur throwing up
gang signs 
n throwin bands
even tho they fake as hell
u just doing this for the clout
no one even likes u 
but ill shut my mouth
ur a sore to be around
i dont love u.
☆
been standin still
thats js how them bitches livin
yeh
blacked out
fucked up
in a cold kitchen
yeh
im tryna whip a cayman one day, so
i can give back to my family, hoe
cus they aint deserve that shit
all my family are fake as shit
im gonna be that bitch
im gonna be the shit
even more so.
☆

sampled comfort chain by instupendo
this song is entirely non profit on Spotify and soundcloud 

thank you

im trying everything possible.

the other side w/ foreign forest

~2300~

@daystowaste
Guitar by 2FLOORSUP

Lyrics:

[VERSE1]
I can’t take the steps in this process And I fight the help that i’m promised; With myself lately I’ve been dishonest Will you treat me less like your project I’ve been holding on too tight
Honest open gone tonight

[HOOK]
Bags packed up
One last cup
To look back on everybody grows up
I’ll write a sad song just for you to show love
You’ll find resolve from it whenever the time comes Bags packed up
One last cup
To look back on everybody grows up
I’ll write a sad song just for you to show love
You’ll find resolve from it whenever the time comes

[DAYS TO WASTE]
You were something
Cigarettes in my lungs you were toxic
Light a match leave it all to assumption
That’s okay baby i’m going numb anyway
Don’t call back i’m leaving and that’s that Driving away to a place I can relax
Cause I can’t escape this
I made you a playlist
Of every song that convinced me I hate this Say goodbye to distant lies
The pain you dealt a thousand times
Cause i’ve been staying up all night
To wash away the wasted time
But i’m so tired
Sick of the lies and the miles I drove back home Cause i’ve been someone else for a long time

[HOOK]
Bags packed up
One last cup
To look back on everybody grows up
I’ll write a sad song just for you to show love
You’ll find resolve from it whenever the time comes Bags packed up
One last cup
To look back on everybody grows up
I’ll write a sad song just for you to show love
You’ll find resolve from it whenever the time comes

Resolve w/ Days To Waste

<3 

tilting over like the pictures on your wall
i didnt wanna meet your mom and dad they didnt like me at all
somehow they liked me oh
down the line its you and me now that dont get along and
somethings arent always better than nothing
your love is like the ocean and i just wanna jump in
relationships and me they hardly ever work
im tryna keep my balance i just keep slipping first

so is it annoying i keep falling
no i dont wanna say goodbye
and it keeps slipping in my conscious
youre better off not being alive
oh im disgusted
i wanna end it all and watch the world turn to dust bitch
im tired of seeing everybody get what they want 
when i cant get what i need
im on the fucking edge of everything i just wanna leave

oh oh oh
so is it important to you cause god knows this shits important to me
and i lost every part of me trynna be what they want me to be
theres a war inside my head lately i just want peace
so is it annoying i keep falling cant stand on my two damn feet
i tried a thousand of times im at a thousand and one
i wanna blow my fucking brains but i dont own a gun
none of this is fun

so is it annoying i keep falling
no i dont wanna say goodbye
and it keeps slipping in my conscious
youre better off not being alive
oh im disgusted
i wanna end it all and watch the world turn to dust bitch
im tired of seeing everybody get what they want 
when i cant get what i need
im on the fucking edge of everything i just wanna leave

<3

disgusted with myself

spotify

DISGUSTED WITH MYSELF [p. king theta]

shoutout to everyone in this song ily all :) <3
prod. sorrow bringer (goat)
mix: epitome, kanashi, autumn, casperrr
master: epitome

EPITOME:

if you look into my blackened soul 
you’ll see i’ve begun to decompose 
and with nothing but a rope around my neck
i’ll hang in the gallows dead
hold back the tears you’ll shed
leave all the words unsaid
i was hanging on by a thread
it’s better off instead 
that i’m 6 feet deep beneath the surface
i’ve said this once i know i’m worthless
i fall short of being perfect 
can you show me that i’m worth it
am i worth saving?
my body’s decaying
my flesh is rotting 
i feel like a zombie
i think the ends approaching
i feel it upon me
now i know i’m not worth saving 
i’m trying but it doesn’t seem to be enough
no one gives a fuck
i don’t even know what i’ve become
(can you tell me what i’ve become i give in too easy oh the end has just begun)

KANASHI:

Ion even know what I’ve become 
shits got me so fucked up…
And pls don’t wake me 
I’m busy taking a break from life
Ion wanna be a part of this anymore 
One foot in and the other out the door 
Cuz nothing lasts forever 
So just toss me like a wrapper on the floor…

AUTUMN:

i can't tell tonight apart from all them in the past
i can speak, i can breathe, but my brain is gonna gache
if you feed off of me, hope you like consuming trash
waking up inside this bed 
is something i'd rather not have
i'm tearing at my skin
could it get much worse than this
that's the only thing i'd ask
besides when you'll text me back

CASPERRR:

don't you text me back 
please i don't wanna relapse
feel this agonizing pressure on my chest
i can't breathe,i can't eat i can't get no rest  

fucked up, over what u told me
u left and now i'm lonely 
got 5gs and smoked that whole shit, holy-moly
u really said i was ur only
that guy was just a homie 
and now im dyin slowly, lonely

the other side w/ foreign forest

ashes

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