trauma 🤙

Playlist 39

Impostor

LYRICS:

Oh, what a world, yeah, it seems like
I kinda like how it bleeds, la-la-like
One tiny little mistake tends to
Make the monster in me break out, out


La-la-la-like a sweet cake hiding poison or a princess with corruption
Maybe, girls who like their jewelry, they’re all kinda just like me
Entitled rules and higher standards, queens so broke they’ll take STD’s
Take your pick from perfect plastics, least they’ll love you genuine
-
Bu-bu-but like a needle-euthanasia and the doctor’s your own mama
Or a bow tie that’s a clip-on, we all have need to lie 
When betrayal turns to bloodlust or the bearing bites the dust
And kinda like those small support beams, they’ll all snap eventually


Oh, what a world, yeah, it seems like
I kinda like how it bleeds, la-la-like
One tiny little mistake tends to
Make the monster in me break out
-
Oh, what a world, yeah, it seems like
I kinda like how you bleed, la-la-like
One tiny little mistake tends to
Make the monster in me break out, out


W-W-W-With the spirals in her eyes and the colors of blinding sunrise
In her hair and in her prize, she’ll quickly take what she claimed ‘mine’
Oh, what a shame for all this heartache, seems the girl in pink’s cathartic
Laughing, crying, smiling as if her life ain’t over now
-
Bu-bu-but like a needle-euthanasia and the killer’s one you trusted
Or a bow tie decoration, hiding lies is all I know
Cutesy outside, shiny barrel, toxic mess if you dissect
Sweet lolita with a med kit, she won’t let you forget
-
A-a-and lastly with the pros and cons of right and wrong or dusk or dawn
And the law or what turns me on, I really couldn’t care at all
If I find benefit then that’s it, I don’t get the buzz in all these 
silly little things, If they’re not about me then it’s a miss
-
Sociopathy is the thing they say when you don't understand the ways,
lacking care for basic rights, basic wrongs, tilted scales
So what if I prioritize me, ain't self love an importance?
Something that you should know: there really is no cure for me


Oh, what a world, yeah, it seems like
I kinda like how it bleeds, la-la-like
One tiny little mistake tends to
Make the monster in me break out
-
Oh, what a world, yeah, it seems like
I kinda like how you bleed, la-la-life
One tiny little mistake tends to
Make the monster in me break out

SOCIOPATHY -【IMPOSTOR】FT. MEGURINE LUKA // VOCALOID ORIGINAL SONG

LYRICS:

A diamond hidden in the rough lies
Beloved by all those who’d admire
Its light scattered and refracted
A model of perfection realized


A life so holy and desirable, it’s what I live by
And not a thing is out of place each space upheld by guidelines
And who’s to occupy the minds of all the rats adoring
And who’s to occupy deranged thoughts of jealousy
-
For just one step out of place they’ll
Take everything admired
Hands off, now DON’T YOU TOUCH ME


The diamond hidden in the rough lies
Forsaken to be scratched away by
The dirt that seems to surround it
The gem that was adored and bright cracks


A life that’s taken up by crime and petty fighting is theirs
For all they know is how to steal and cheat, corrupt purity
And all my senses overwhelmed with a boisterous lack of manners
Impoverished pitiful merciless menagerie 


Mud trailed through, dirty slew, now I’m like you, ripped and torn and caked in Earth, my
Garden is dead, rot in stead, and I’m ready to give out how I’ve always thought ‘bout
All of you dirt, now I’m hurt, all you slur is useless nonsense no one cares for!
What you have done, just for fun, was to bring down someone whose life had some substance!
-
(For just one step out of place they’ll
Take everything admired
Hands off, now DON’T YOU TOUCH ME)


Now, time to rest, their presence lost tolerance
I’ll eradicate them


This diamond hidden in the rough now
Its luster stripped and scored away, how
This diamond hidden in the rough serves
To show how dust can tear away grandeur 


Please stay away, I’m afraid, harmed and battered, understand what you have done now
Please stay away, I’m okay to use force and I won’t repeat it any longer!
Why, all at once, have you made me undone so viciously and without mercy
Now, I’m unclean, no more sheen rough and beat, now it’s all gone so DON’T YOU TOUCH ME X2

Hands off, now DON’T YOU TOUCH ME

DON'T TOUCH ME -【IMPOSTOR】FT. SOLARIA LITE // SYNTHV ORIGINAL SONG

LYRICS:

I am your one salvation, I am all seraphim 
I am holy perfection, I am the spinning rings
I am the king of kings, I am all cherubim
I am your one salvation, I will punish all sin
-
You cannot comprehend me, your mind will rot away
You’re cursed to speak my name, you will be not afraid
Your fate is at my mercy, your entrails strung along
You now exist to serve me, I am a HYBRID GOD


Back out into the fray, a dark war is waging 
All inside of my mind, underlying rage
When the world’s crashing down, you turn to a demon
One that I can’t contain, rest assured you’ve won

(Angel hiding in the dark a face of nightmares in the bark
One thousand winters cold to touch, I now refuse to be your crutch)
-
Back out into the cold, moon shining above me
Cord in hand but I know that I’m far too weak
Look up to the bright light, falling down to my knees
Somehow now I feel safe bathing in the rays

(An angel hiding in the tree its voice so calming calls to me
One thousand cries of apology, gone unheard this snowy night)


Right now I’m more fed up than the thought of suicide
When all I feel is useless, I really want to die
So understand the plight of the future holy light
I’ll break my neck to get there, this is my one goodbye, this is my last goodbye


I am your one salvation, I am all seraphim 
I am holy perfection, I am the spinning rings
I am the king of kings, I am all cherubim
I am your one salvation, I will punish all sin
-
You cannot comprehend me, your mind will rot away
You’re cursed to speak my name, you will be not afraid
Your fate is at my mercy, your entrails strung along
You now exist to serve me, for I’m a HYBRID GOD


Only one way to look, crane my neck to view it
Only one voice to hear who is never wrong
Whisper all that I need, tell me now about your
Plan, upkeep it I will ‘til the deed is done

(Angel hiding in the dark a face of nightmares in the bark
One thousand winters cold to touch, I now refuse to be your crutch)
-
My divine destiny, fate will never fail me
Even though I’m alone, I don’t really mind
Being the greatest part of euphoric future
Being someone adored, now that fate is mine

(An angel hiding in the tree its voice so calming calls to me
One thousand cries of apology, gone unheard this snowy night)


Wonder how they’d think of me now all alone, I’ll take this tree down
Bloodline ran so cold as ice, and with this cord, I’ll roll the dice X2
-
Right now I’m more fed up than the thought of suicide
When all I feel is useless, I really want to die
So understand the plight of the future holy light
I’ll break my neck to get there, this is my last goodbye


I am your one salvation, I am all seraphim 
I am holy perfection, I am the spinning rings
I am the king of kings, I am all cherubim
I am your one salvation, I will punish all sin
-
I gave myself this mindset, but only to survive
When all you feel is useless, you would just want to die
So fake it ‘til you make it, or else you’d wish you’re gone
Don’t doubt this identity, aren't’ I a HYBRID GOD?

HYBRID GOD -【IMPOSTOR】FT. 5 VOCALOIDS // VOCALOID ORIGINAL SONG

https://youtu.be/dbmltIJBKF4

@rainpariss

Rain Paris - Running Up That Hill (Kate Bush Cover)

LYRICS:

Today: log in, daily missions, gacha, pick your hero
Hours etched away go passed me, day and night unconsciously - monotony’s my only comfort
Tonight: starving, blocking beatings, trying tying nooses
Hours etched away go passed him, day and night unconsciously - his thoughts consumed, his body bruised, I wish he had an escape


Counting down and counting steps, constant unrest, his room’s a mess
A mockery to he and she, a screw-up and a mistake of a 
Boy mistreated by the world a story told but never heard
The screams and crying silenced on his own ‘cause he knows he’s alone
-
In the dark, in my ballpark, I’m the strongest hero in the worlds
Confident and able to defend those in danger as foretold
When I’m safe and sound I’m free to find this release beyond the screen
M.M.O’s where I belong, I wish fantasy was reality


Today: log in, daily missions, gacha, pick your hero
Hours etched away go passed me, day and night unconsciously - monotony’s my only comfort
Tonight: starving, blocking beatings, trying tying nooses
Hours etched away go passed him, day and night unconsciously - his thoughts consumed, his body bruised, I wish he had an escape


MMO RPG
Mortality creation
MMO RPG 
Mortality eradication
MMO RPG 
Mortality leveling
MMO RPG 
MY MORTALITY OBLITERATION X2


Even among my peers, I’m nothing, but not to her and
Even in her eyes, I’m an object just to fake romance
Nothing could ever seem much better than bitter endings
But to try’s to give up my rapport in my fantasy land
-
Some tell of supernatural humans, a special breed
And some say to join their ranks you’d have to take the drop and swing
Not like I really care for goodness after the rope
But as it stands I have nothing to lose after the deadly leap


Today was my breaking moment but I can’t remember
‘Rest now child, for I’ll ensure you never feel pain like this again’ as he gently held my head
Today the world seemed to show me what was hidden by grey
‘Lend to me your pain and be free, never burdened by these memories, and take this gift blessed by me: life inside RPG’


MMO RPG
Consciousness reinvention
MMO RPG 
Mortality origination
MMO RPG 
Night terrors reimagined
MMO RPG 
MY MORTALITY OBLITERATION X2

MY MORTALITY OBLITERATION RPG -【IMPOSTOR】FT. DEX // VOCALOID ORIGINAL SONG

LYRICS:

Let me VIVISECT the situation, and interject my grand opinion 
VIVISECT what’s caused the issue, and then I’ll help suture up the wound
VIVISECT for I’m the surgeon, I can prescribe you medication
See the effects of infection, removing this tumor will heal you  
-
Intellect is not their strong suit, they came in late and now I have to
Amputate this big part of you, return to me once in a blue moon
VIVISECTION live on broadcast for all to see and all to view
In the spotlight as the surgeon, if I’m to fail I’ll end up like you


Symptoms showing up as if a storm of plagues were cursed upon you
Fevers, throwing up and coughing, sneezing, chills, no interest in food
First to find out what has happened: questions and evaluation
Let me get some bloodwork done and listen for your heart’s percussion 
-
Both of you need to calm down, I’ll get you an answer shortly
Come now dear no need to frown, you won’t be sleeping angry
I, the doctor, can assure my patients end up fine
As for now, here’s my prognosis: you need immediate surgery


Not like I have my own life outside of making sure you don’t kill yourselves


Let me VIVISECT the situation, and interject my grand opinion 
VIVISECT what’s caused the issue, and then I’ll help suture up the wound
VIVISECT for I’m the surgeon, I can prescribe you medication
See the effects of infection, removing this tumor will heal you 
-
Intellect is not their strong suit, they came in late and now I have to
Amputate this big part of you, return to me once in a blue moon
VIVISECTION live on broadcast for all to see and all to view
In the spotlight as the surgeon, if I’m to fail I’ll end up like you


Scalpel drifts across your skin and cuts through the layers perfect
Cauterize the fleshy dermis, move the blade into the muscle
Finding what you’re looking for inside the human body
Can be such a touchy process, one mistake can cause disaster
-
What’s the problem? I can’t see it. Do you think I’m a moron?
Whining from minor discomfort… I really hate those people
Searching far and wide but there’s not even any inside bleeding
Looks to me like I’ll just have to dig much deeper, are you ready?


I feel like I have lost my life to this chore, now I’d rather kill myself


Let me VIVISECT my situation, and sever veins in one fell slice, I’ll
VIVISECT my brain to help you, and then for two, I’ll go through it twice
Even though I’m also like you, and I still cry and feel as you do
I appear to be your go-to, is that because everyone hates you?
-
Self inflict this operation as if to say with life, I’m done
As without this job I’m nothing, and without pain it’s overbearing
VIVISECTION live on broadcast and I’m the cadaver before you
Cut my skin so clean and perfect, and pick my brain until my blood pools

VIVISECT -【IMPOSTOR】FT. DEX // VOCALOID ORIGINAL SONG

LYRICS:

(Oh, happy birthday! Oh, happy birthday!
Oh, what a world, yeah, it seems like
MMO RPG, my mortality obliteration
Paradox, it never stops, going on and on, repeating, unending/Can you keep your sister’s secret, wanting more than what she’s lived?)


I had a dream of someone new today, and I believe they’ll join Mind as says fate
For in the fog, my vision was projected, and in the mist, they looked dejected 
They were on their way to die whether they didn’t know or turned a blind eye
But I believe as fate implies, it is my job to save their lives and guide them to the light


I’d rather lose my life than my youth and beauty
I’d rather lose their life to make my dreams come true
Ain’t nothing wrong with vanity as long as you don’t hurt nobody
But even then if they’re a lab rat, I can’t really find the time to care


(Oh, happy birthday! Oh, happy birthday!)
-
Can it, keep your cake hole shut and quiet I can’t bear to fake it
All this noise and color, flashing of the fire’s gonna make me lose it
The bruises, the nooses, the underlying dread that my whole world is gonna meet its end
No more strength to pretend, I can’t even defend, think I’d rather be dead, but it’s all in my head


I had a dream of someone new today, and I believe they’ll join Mind as says fate
For in the fog, my vision was projected, and in the mist, they looked dejected 
They were on their way to die whether they didn’t know or turned a blind eye
But I believe as fate implies, it is my job to save their lives and guide them to the light
-
(Oh, happy birthday! Oh, happy birthday!
Oh, what a world, yeah, it seems like
MMO RPG, my mortality obliteration
Paradox, it never stops, going on and on, repeating, unending/Can you keep your sister’s secret, wanting more than what she’s lived?)


And so it seems we're at a crossroads, from good to bad to light and fallen angels
Of Yin and Yang and guilty as charged, of those with souls and those with hearts
Exact revenge on those who harmed you, now stay in place so he won’t hurt you
Create a plan, a suicide pact, but even so, I swear she’ll come back

Droning on and on, it’s pointless
Watching others fall, envious
Blood that drips and falls in teardrops
Represent the cherry
-
Green and blue and black and white and me and you and ending strife
In a game of cat and mouse, you’ll chase me down to end my life
As the pale beige turns purple, as my avatar’s torn down
Every day’s worse than the last one, I’d rather rest in the ground


(Oh, happy birthday! Oh, happy birthday!
Oh, what a world, yeah, it seems like
MMO RPG, my mortality obliteration
Paradox, it never stops, going on and on, repeating, unending/Can you keep your sister’s secret, wanting more than what she’s lived?)

SUICIDE PACT ON DEATH ROW -【IMPOSTOR】FT. 6 VOCALS // VSYNTH ORIGINAL SONG

LYRICS:

Tie me up and break me down, unspoken words I’ll shout out loud
Wonder what I’m looking for, besides the consequence of fighting more
Undoubt, the hounds have come to tear me apart
I’ll drown, fall down, but it’s a work of art
-
Even though I know the point is moot and it’s a losing battle
I can’t help but crave the rush of feigning blindness for the crowd


Beat me to the last breath that I’ll take
Know that this won’t be my final day
So break my mind and make me deaf
Your screams are all I need to cause my death


Little maggots crawling all around beneath my claws, beneath me now
Follow my lead, for my eyes you’ll plead, unmistaken I will be undoubt
Fortified wrath, unbreakable walls, no sympathy for those who crawl
Am I alone, or am I adored? Who cares, after all my name echos
-
Pitiful sludge and larvae all around, I’m a giant to you all
Little spiders crawling at my feet must stay away I’m arachnophobic
Pitiful wastes of space all cursed to have that face, I’ll cull them all
Am I alone, or am I adored? Who cares, after all my name echos


Bloodied by the cut of all those words I heard
Sadomasochistic urges
-
Spinning in a web of yin and yang
But to us, this war is just some silly game


Beat me to the last breath that I’ll take
Know that this won’t be my final day
So break my mind and make me deaf
Your screams are all I need to cause my death


Little maggots crawling all around beneath my claws, beneath me now
Follow my lead, for my eyes you’ll plead, unmistaken I will be undoubt
Fortified wrath, unbreakable walls, no sympathy for those who crawl
Am I alone, or am I adored? Who cares, after all my name echos
-
Pitiful sludge and larvae all around, I’m a giant to you all
Little spiders crawling at my feet must stay away I’m arachnophobic
Pitiful wastes of space all cursed to have that face, one day I’ll cull them
Am I alone, or am I adored? Who cares, after all my name echos X2
-
Lay me down upon my final resting place
Gently close my eyes, your soft hands drift across my face
Please remember that I’ll be okay
A victim’s plight is sung before their better days

FORTIFIED ARACHNOPHOBIA -【IMPOSTOR】FT. 3 VOCALS // VSYNTH ORIGINAL SONG

lyrics:

empty words and empty visions, my senses numb to the world
moving melodies are all that invoke tears rather than tragedy 
to be truthful and risk it all i never felt anything for you
i just wanted to see you cry, feel less alone, and have you hold me
-
i don’t think you realize quite how much it means to be seen
and yet the emotions mean nothing
a sense of dread in the back of my head behind a wall i can’t see past
leaves me empty and melancholic contrasting the colors behind the wall


black and white clouds cry rainbow tears
i don’t know why i feel or why i don’t 
i don’t understand the meaning of any of this
all i feel is upset that i am empty 
-
black and white thoughts, a prism heart
it never ever seems to be enough
tell me am i selfish just to want to feel?
or will you tell me that i’m in the wrong?


all i feel is melancholy for the - colors behind the wall
all there is is melancholy behind a wall

melancholy behind a wall

LYRICS:

Never heard praise, onward stretching days
Constant reminders of how I’ve fell short
One and two, constantly compared to you
Never a moment to feel glowing sun 
-
I’m to him as rust is to silver
Non an issue, non of import
I’m to gold, tarnished, and pitiful
He doesn’t love me, in his eyes are just gold


Lay alone, my blood as my pillow
Stone so cold as I sleep and shiver
Try and try but only to fall short
Uncontrolled is my fate familiar 
Write my plight on torn and sewn parchment
Poems sing how I’m BREATHING SILVER
I’m BREATHING SILVER


You are a beacon, shining and beautiful
I’m just a bum who knows not of good
And to the people, you prove how you’re worthy
I promise too I can be like you
-
Just a drop will engage a vengeance
Sylver tears now run through his veins
Take a breath for it is his last one
On his deathbed, a choice will be made
Second place is where I remain


Lay alone, my blood as my pillow
Stone so cold as I sleep and shiver
Try and try but only to fall short
Uncontrolled is my fate familiar 
Write my plight on torn and sewn parchment
Poems sang as my last resentment
Lost, alone, abandoned by future
Don’t you know that I’m BREATHING SILVER
I’m BREATHING SILVER

BREATHING SILVER

LYRICS:

Off the stage with you, I’ve arrived
To name my price, come and feast your eyes
Shine the lights upon your star
I’ll stay right here forever more
-
Step aside, all will hear this anthem
Cheering loud, begging for encore 
Know your place far below my kingdom
Sing out GET OFF THE STAGE 


Every try and take I’d make, unfounded and unworthy
All the stress and self-odium never would subside
Years and years would pass me by with little recognition
Waited for my time so now I’m gonna make it mine
-
I don’t mind the work, work, demons always lurk, lurk
But to say I’m terrified would be so undermining
I don’t mind the hurt, hurt, here to show the world, world
Won’t stay silent, I’ll design an empire where I reign


Off the stage with you, I’ve arrived
To name my price, come and feast your eyes
Shine the lights upon your star
I’ll stay right here forever more
-
Step aside, all will hear this anthem
Cheering loud, begging for encore 
Know your place far below my kingdom
Sing out GET OFF THE STAGE 


Always torn down, denied a crown
Watch in silence all above
Else feels worse than giving your all
Just to remain in the dark
-
One more time, one more attempt, I swear this won’t be my end
With just another push I’m sure this time I’ll seize the chance to shine
Now I see an opening, given one more chance to sing
I swear I’ll prove myself as someone worthy of the masses’ time


Off the stage with you, I’ve arrived
To name my price, come and feast your eyes
Shine the lights upon your star
I’ll stay right here forever more
-
Step aside, all will hear this anthem
Cheering loud, begging for encore 
Know your place far below my kingdom
Sing out GET OFF THE STAGE 
-
Sing out GET OFF THE STAGE