ove is such an interesting and complex collection of emotions and impulses. It encapsulates many emotions, both positive and negative, and is unique to each person and each instance of love. I think you are not incorrect in your judgement of what love is, but I think both are correct at the same time, it's simply a framing distinction. 

Love for another is largely what you said before, selflessness, compassion unconditionally, a willingness to self sacrifice for another. But that doesn't happen in a vacuum. What you describe second is also very important, and I would describe that as self-love and self-respect. You must appreciate who you are and what your needs are, and have an expectation in others to see and respect that. It is an essential element in loving another as well, because external love, without self-love, is a recipe for co-dependence, which is exploitative and antithetical to actual love. The opposite, but so close and so parallel. 

One sided love is absolutely possible, and can be a destructive situation without the self-love a person needs. But "true" love, which is a powerful thing, is when the love and self-love between two people come together in a mutual way for the growth of two people. It's rare, it's difficult, and it takes constant work, and it also isn't constant. I think that people make the mistake of thinking "love is eternal." We like that idea, but love can be fleeting like any emotion. Not less true or real, but possibly less permanent. Love is an emotion, not a relationship status. That need for permanency twists love into resentment and awful lot

i love you (prod. neverforever)

Avoidant personality disorder (AVPD) is a mental health condition characterized by profound feelings of inadequacy, hypersensitivity to criticism or rejection, and avoidance of social situations due to a deep fear of being criticized, humiliated, or rejected. People with AVPD desire social connection but their maladaptive avoidance patterns, stemming from their feelings of being socially inept or inferior, lead to significant distress and difficulty functioning in daily life.

i love you (prod. neverforever)

Juneborn