prod.me

@trustt
i write it, then i fucking trash it
i can't stand it, i keep doing damage
to myself and, all those all around me
you don't like me, tell me if you like-

am i a nuisance?
tear my fucking walls down
i can't do this

"you're a problem"
that's all that i hear now
i can't do this

@lynyou
i think i got a problem 
i keep spiraling
i'm losing track of the time
feels like i'm blind to it
burn it up watch it fall
i'll just tear it down
but i don't feel a thing
i just like the sound

wish i could start from scratch
i cant do this
i watched it fall down
but i'm still moving
i got nothing left to love
i wish u knew this
i watched it fall down
but i'm still moving

@trustt
i put my feelings in the backseat
that's where i sleep, that's where i sleep
do you think of me? i don't think you do
it's poison in my dreams and all i see is you
do you still think that i'm pretty? 
can you tell me before i sleep?
i feel bad in the morning, in the night
and in between
i thought i had a life
but i got no memories
and i think i wanna die
i don't know 
i'm just run down
i'm just run down
i'm just run down
i'm just run down
i'm just run down
i'm just run down
i'm just run down
i'm just run down
i'm just-

last week
i'ma pass out in the backseat
i'ma laugh when i'm passing
i'm not healthy for your safety
you don't know me
you just knew me last week

i got no friends, no car
i don't wish on no star
i got no friends, no car
i don't wish on no star

blinded

@daywxtch
@adridoesthings

a huge thank you to @schbwp, @another-autumn-479671184 and @dotgavn for addition sound design and background vox

this took 2 months to make
141 tracks

the color

hoarder house

confess it

the ring (p. fakejoy)

https://soundcloud.com/14gardens
https://soundcloud.com/b3v3l
https://soundcloud.com/cus3d

Glow before

cover of "fresh static snow" by porter robinson
made november 15 2024

lyrics:
you'd fit perfectly to me we'd end our loneliness, melt this curse away
though i'll never know your name, i'll cry for you the same

the frozen white noise static snow that is your memory
although i know we'll never meet, you're every part of me



freshStaticSnow

i did what i had to
called u out by name 

u told me u missed me
in all that remains

i trusted the oddity
and ill tell u honestly
i heard all in homily
full with all of ur qualities

i told my apolegy
but it came out it blank

its the first time
and i just learned how to change
its the worst time
and everyone is all the same

but your different
called u out by ur name
its the first time
someone’s made me feel like u do

its the first time
and i just learned how to change
its the worst time
and everyone is all the same

but your alright
from all that remains
its the first time
someone’s made me feel like u do

its the first time
and i just learned how to change
its the worst time
and everyone is all the same

but your different
called u out by ur name
its the first time
someone’s made me feel like u do

its the first time
and i just learned how to change
its the worst time
and everyone is all the same

but your alright
from all that remains
its the first time
someone’s made me feel like u do

i did what i had to
called u out by name 

u told me u missed me
in all that remains

i trusted the oddity
and ill tell u honestly
i heard all in homily
full with all of ur qualities

i told my apolegy
but it came out it blank

its the first time
and i just learned how to change
its the worst time
and everyone is all the same

but your different
called u out by ur name
its the first time
someone’s made me feel like u do

its the first time
and i just learned how to change
its the worst time
and everyone is all the same

but your alright
from all that remains
its the first time
someone’s made me feel like u do

its the first time
and i just learned how to change
its the worst time
and everyone is all the same

but your different
called u out by ur name
its the first time
someone’s made me feel like u do

its the first time
and i just learned how to change
its the worst time
and everyone is all the same

but your alright
from all that remains
its the first time
someone’s made me feel like u do

its the first time
and i just learned how to change
its the worst time
and everyone is all the same

but your alright
from all that remains
its the first time
someone’s made me feel like u do

the first time

graveyard voxmix prod fakejoy

@kyumoosic

liar
ur a liar
ur a liar
bitch im tired

liar
dont u desire
ur a liar
ur a liar

liar
ur a liar
ur a liar
bitch im tired

liar
dont u desire
ur a liar
ur a liar

liar

if i had the life i wanted i would still be throwing up

the first time

xue