Rivilin:

I know anxiety lives in me 
if I stay here will I lose my mind I think I've already passed that time
plagued by derealization feel like im looking through a fucking glass
feel like this ain't my body im just in a dream will death wake me up

these drugs no they don't mean shit when this body doesn't feel even real
can’t keep up a fucking job it feels like im just blessed with bad luck
try to explain it to someone but they don't understand
like why can't I be normal for a second so I can feel human

my body on this cold concrete no furniture fucking around
convinced these shadows on the walls are out for me till im in the ground
take a step back id like to realize that im ok it's just my perspective
It cus feels like im living in my skull like nothing is real and this is all a dream

till I take my life and I wake up, maybe then ill be happy in this place
my psychologist doesn't get it, no amount of therapy can change what I feel
I tell my mother that im ok, that im just going through a rough patch
this is my reality, ill fake a smile and say that im fine

floating above this city,
if I let go will I suddenly fall then can I wake up
to me, this place isn't pretty
I feel disgusted when I see myself suicide’s not enough

there's a constant battle in me
gravity has given in hear the wind roaring as I collide
with the concrete end it quickly 
my eyes snap open breathe heavy, every time I die I wake up

Coaastgxd:


Every time I die I wake up
Every time I die I…

This time I'm just fine running away
And I'd sell my soul just to better the days
I never get a hold of this, I throw it away
I never know what to say, I make the same old mistakes

I been playing in traffic with my emotions and 
I'm closer to a rope than I been in a fucking minute, oh
Every time I think I'm getting better, I end up fucking sendin'
Now I'm back to the motherfucking beginning tho

Can't sleep and I can't wake up
"Life's tough, get a helmet and, shit, man up"
I been stuck and I'm spinning my tires up in the mud
Going nowhere fast, The ash floating over the sun

Rivilin:

my body on this cold concrete no furniture fucking around
convinced these shadows on the walls are out for me till im in the ground
take a step back id like to realize that im ok it's just my perspective
It cus feels like im living in my skull like nothing is real and this is all a dream

till I take my life and I wake up, maybe then ill be happy in this place
my psychologist doesn't get it, no amount of therapy can change what I feel
I tell my mother that im ok, that im just going through a rough patch
this is my reality, ill fake a smile and say that im fine

floating above this city,
if I let go will I suddenly fall then can I wake up
to me, this place isn't pretty
I feel disgusted when I see myself suicide’s not enough

there's a constant battle in me
gravity has given in hear the wind roaring as I collide
with the concrete end it quickly 
my eyes snap open breathe heavy, every time I die I wake up

Scarlett FT. Coaastgxd

Pseudo - Red on the Inside

ART BY SUICIDALGALLERY
https://www.instagram.com/suicidalgallery/

LYRICS:

the way you stare it burns
what's left of me I never learn
hells jaws below consume
the way you smile makes me return

yeah call me a waste of space
Yeah say im not worth your time
yeah hiding behind a lie
watch my mental state decline

yeah watch as I withdraw
tell me how do I repair a broken core
I try to explain but you ignore
I fall further than before

yeah crumbling on myself
thought I could trust someone again
no, it's a lie yeah you were right
suicide will fix my head

no im not fine take some more drugs
didnt think id be alone
inside are breaking everything is shaking
everyone I loved is gone

saying you care, but you just share all your moments yeah with him
breaking apart, wish on a star didnt think I’d lose a friend
you want to go behind my back and break my trust again and again
didnt think I’d lose my hope in  being alive but now I wish for death

isn't it crazy how you can put everything into someone you love
but you know that you're never enough, numbing the pain out with the drugs
watch the skin start to peel and flake, the person I love is the one I hate
I should of crossed off I shouldn't let you in, I know that was just a mistake

Tired

FACELIFT NOW AVAILABLE ON ALL STREAMING PLATFORMS

Thank you for always listening, i love you

Release Me ft. s0cliché (prod. NERW)

Blank face staring back thru the mirror
Wish I knew where to find another picture
Cold frost lurks through the other window
Damn, I'll never understand how to end up

Try to crash memories but they're all gone
Try to live through the pain but im so lost
Say I cant come back, but ive come up?
What ya say, what ya say, what ya say now?

TAKE MY SOUL
TAKE MY ALL,
TAKE MY ALL, NOW
TIME TO FALL
NOTHER GHOST
IN MY OWN HOUSE

BROKEN MENTAL, IN THE ZONE
IN MY SAFE SPACE -
TRANSFORM, CODE NEVER LEFT ME
NOTHA TASTE FROM THE ORG TRYNA PLACE ME
TIME I GET A FORWARD ON MY OWN PACE

STAY ALONE, ALL THE TIME
DOES IT HELP ME?
FORGOT WHATS ITS LIKE
TO FEEL AGAIN.
TO FEEL AGAIN.
UGH, EY

Blank face staring back thru the mirror
Wish I knew where to find another picture
Cold frost lurks through the other window
Damn, I'll never understand how to end up

Try to crash memories but they're all gone
Try to live through the pain but im so lost
Say I cant come back, but ive come up?
What ya say, what ya say, what ya say now?

I've dug through my pockets, and come up empty...

IDLEGLANCE

I've dug through my pockets, and come up empty... [prod. purc]

Lost in your pretty eyes
I'd rather hold you in my arms
Lying with the love and scars
That bear the pain
Baby you'll never change 
No one to take it all away 
As I'm turning to a ghost 
And I'm to blame

You say I'm to blame now for all of our problems
 According to you I'm just evil in disguise
Tears in the rain, I got a mind full of sorrow 
Loving is pain
 I gave you my trust
my everything wasn't enough
still high off your drugs
a blurry frame of who I was
a dangerous lust
you're poisonous down to the touch 
Now I'm fading to a ghost, and I'm to blame 

Lost in your pretty eyes
I'd rather hold you in my arms
Lying with the love and scars
That bear the pain
Baby you'll never change 
No one to take it all away 
As I'm turning to a ghost 
And I'm to blame

I've been losing touch with the old you
If we keep losing trust it'll happen again
Better off alone in the bad news
Only time will heal the wounds

Started caving in
And i'm admitting it now
Distant memories are haunting more than doubt
Will it be enough 
All While you're rotting in my head
Like a plague of our regret
Hope I'm the same

lost in your pretty eyes
Don't chase tears waiting on me
Wasting life away
Always because of you
The chains are getting loose

My smile is coming down 
I wanna love you now
Begging to see the sun 
Take me for another round
I need her warm embrace
Before I meet the horizon 
I know only time will heal the wounds

Crown Of Sorrow ft. Luke Mara

Walking on a tightrope in the end
Been looking at the way down from the air
It may be time to ease the pain
Broken stride caught in the rain

Just leave me to die
I let my soul weep
Paralyzed that part of me
Blind eyes that can't see
All the shame within
Dark days are too loud
Uneasy right now

Baby will you stay forever 
Dont rip my heart out
Before it's empty 
Cause you're worth more than life
The shattered glass of mine
Reflect a better time

If I don’t do something right
I may disappear
I’ve been lining up the white
Look in the mirror
I couldn’t see my reflection
My course in need of correction
I’ve been hanging by a thread
Don’t look at me unravel
You’ve been running through my head
I’ve been kicking up gravel
To keep up with you
We made it through the summer
Make no sudden moves
No telling what I might do

Just leave me to die
I let my soul weep
Paralyzed that part of me
Blind eyes that can't see
All the shame within
Dark days are too loud
Uneasy right now

Baby will you stay forever 
Dont rip my heart out
Before it's empty 
Cause you're worth more than life
The shattered glass of mine
Reflect a better time

Ad Nauseam ft. RiverKinn (prod. 52Blu)

LEDs blind me
yeah, stigmatism covers up what I wanna see
when I’m looking at your pretty face, yeah you got me
wrapped around you little fingers yeah, my soul was free for the taking
 
it’s like what did you mean I didn’t get it
stuck in the past with my obsession
got a collection of memories 
burn them on the wall for all to see
 
it’s like what is that smell my flesh is burning
stuck in the tide I see you turning
fragments of wood sticking out your flesh
the void is leaking from my chest
 
my friends now covered in the dragon’s rot
they didn’t seem to mind that I was stuck
with the crows above calling out my name
didn’t seem to matter how much I changed
 
loved ones passed out in the burning house
smoked bellowed in my lungs and I’m left in doubt
like was I the one to start this flame
didn’t mean to burn out now nothing remained
 
now the clouds above are looking at me
filling their guts with my pity
crying out loud, I’m smothered in shame
resurrection the love I called pain
 
now the fragile bodies pile up like logs
turn my back on my problems cus I know its a lot
this reality is nothing that I could dream
guess misery has finally found his peace

I guess the person that just I really miss is me
yeah, what have I become
misery just finds a way to seep into me
I guess it’s time to say that I’m done
 
every day is suffering so please won’t you leave
you only care to know that you’ve won
sink into the past to find that memories haunt me
this wasn’t something that could be love

sick of me, sick of us
yeah, every time I try to
explain it I seem to rot
yeah, fake friends corrupt
 
yeah can’t get grip on myself fingers are shaking losing patience
of me and the place I call home from the start I was just alone
lather myself in drugs to feel nothing cus it better then feeling something
cus I don’t want to feel this anger again from a childhood where I didn’t understand
 
the consequences of being different pushed aside there was no interest.
of understanding who I could be and who I became
until I met you I thought you were everything that I deserve
you brought hell to my mental state I didn’t think it could get worse
 
down here now in the abyss I see friends are suffering  all the same
burning out our mental trauma from the bones of family ones that lay 
when the osulouths come down and change the forms that we try to portray
distorted figures is what became, no face could recognize the pain.
 
how do we survive when we don’t understand the person in front of us
disgusted by reflections of everyone that just seem to pass.
now time doesn’t wait for now one, so we ignore the issues and drown it out
so, we live in constant agony fill us to the brim aching doubt

I miss me

Spotify

CHRIS RAIN - MONTREAL

Prod, ARQ
🖤pyrrhic🖤
@dearpyrrhic
☠️www.instagram.com/dearpyrrhic/
lyrics:
Runnin' into your forest fire
Walkin' onto your razor wire
I swear I'm fine but I'm alive

I'mma kill myself leave a pretty body up inside the grave
Now, it might be in a year or it might be here today
Tell my momma not to cry, put my body on display
'Cause the roses look pretty when they die and wilt away
Light me at both ends and watch me disappear into the smoke
Why you kickin' at my chair when I'm not finished tyin' rope
I'mma tell you when it's time, I'mma show you all the signs
I'mma tell you when it's time, I'mma show you all the signs

If I spilled my heart, and it landed up on the carpet
Come on tell me baby girl would you pick it up, would you stomp it
'Cause I'm really not the one to ever go and get nauseous
But all these feelin's in my stomach make me wanna vomit, vomit
Say you hit rock bottom and you drownin' in your stress
I'm throwin' you a shovel I'll show you how deep it gets
When yo life is on the line and yo body no longer listens to you
To you

Don't tell me you ain't done enough
Don't tell me you ain't man enough
I feel like we don't talk enough
I feel like we don't "fuck it, fuck it"
Cry enough
I feel like we don't laugh enough
I feel like we don't matter much
I feel like we don't "Fuck it"

Runnin' into your forest fire
Walkin' onto your razor wire
I swear I'm fine but I'm alive

I'mma kill myself leave a pretty body up inside the grave
Now, it might be in a year or it might be here today
Tell my momma not to cry, put my body on display
'Cause the roses look pretty when they die and wilt away

Hold steady don't waste your time
There's nothin' between these lines
If ever I'm feelin' short
I know that my dealer's blind
How many levels of gray
Does it take to shade the pain?

The crack of my skin
Pale of your bones
All that I lack
Is nothin' you hold
Hide your keepsakes
It's all that you'll have
When you meet...

Old medicine inside my desk that don't remember me
Workin' for a life that is best, I fill your every need
Cherish the knife inside my back that you have given me
Stop cryin' baby boy

I'mma kill myself leave a pretty body up inside the grave
Now, it might be in a year or it might be here today
Tell my momma not to cry, put my body on display
'Cause the roses look pretty when they die and wilt away
Light me at both ends and watch me disappear into the smoke
Why you kickin' at my chair when I'm not finished tyin' rope
I'mma tell you when it's time, I'mma show you all the signs
I'mma tell you when it's time, I'mma show you all the signs

EXIT LIFE

KASPER FELL

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