vlog

Sad fucking boi hours

chill playlist to relax when you are feeling tired.

𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘮𝘱𝘵𝘴, 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧

Chill

Coldbrew

falling apart

tiempo de amor

Bandcamp

13 Young Lovers

05 Girl

Fangs 

Written by Matt Champion
Production by Romil Hemnani, Albert Gordon, & Russell "JOBA" Boring
Engineered by Russell "JOBA" Boring

Fangs

Merk & Kremont & Ady Suleiman - Sad Story (Out Of Luck) is out now!

Get it here: https://merkandkremont.lnk.to/SadStoryOutOfLuck

Sad Story (Out Of Luck)

Download / stream

Merk & Kremont & Ady Suleiman - Sad Story (Out Of Luck) [OUT NOW]

produced and mixed by @barnesblvd
Cover art by Julia Jordan

Ultimately

Download!

Ultimately (Prod. barnes blvd.)

Much love and have a good winter soul this year! ⛄️❤️


All produced by Summer soul
Lyrics by Summer soul
Composed by Summer soul
Special Thanks to Charming Lips
MV LINK <from the short film called 'The Snowman'> 
:https://youtu.be/Q6PohZ4YHYs


If you want a Christmas Day
I can give you a cup of cocoa
Even if it was cold bae
don’t worry I’ll be there for you

Every night I see you falling down there
Baby you might feel like hurt and hiding down there
and so much worries you were holding inside of you
The scars and tears will dry

You'll be fine 
Don't worry bae
I'll light up the candles for you
I will say that My Christmas Day's for you

내가 항상 네 곁에 있어 줄 순 없지만
늘 내 생각을 해 주길 바래
눈을 감고 잘 들어 봐 
약속해
늘 여기 있을게

널 위한 선물 하날 준비했어
비록 남들처럼 근사한 건 아니지만
서툴지만 빼곡한 편지와 스노우볼   
이 크리스마스를 기억해 줘

You'll be fine 
Don't worry bae
I'll light up the candles for you
I will say that My Christmas Day's for you

Christmas

My Christmas Day Is For You

i dont know why i love you but i do - christian leave cover

when you're near

[prod. jakkyboi]

so tie me
to the train tracks 
light me up like a blunt when you face that
hate me 
when I’m dead and 
gone so far but I’ll stay in your head and

Tie me to the train tracks
Tie me to the train tracks
Tie me to the train tracks
Leave me there on my own dont look back

I dont really wanna talk i wanna walk away
Shawty say she wanna fuck i tell her not today
I been busy so i cant respond to all the hate
I dont fuck with laziness because i cant relate

this that sad shit
this that don’t show your dad shit
this that “oh this whole wave just a fad shit”

Pop 4 xans then it all fades to black shit
16 bars gonna cost you a rack bitch
 
Wrote you a note but i just wanna burn it
Life is a gift but i want to return it
Crashin the whip got trash in the bin
Say its just words but it cuts deep like a surgeon

just words but im fucked up from the hurt and
Your lies got me tossing and turning
Notes from the class that we had back in high school
Joking about how i want to be like you

so tie me
to the train tracks 
light me up like a blunt when you face that
hate me 
when I’m dead and 
gone so far but I’ll stay in your head and

Tie me to the train tracks
Tie me to the train tracks
Tie me to the train tracks
Leave me there on my own dont look back

tie me to the train tracks

ღ luv bug ღ

guitar by bye mugen. made this in an hour lol sorry

there’s nothing left to say
i’m not okay
i hate feeling this way
but can’t you see
this place is about to burn
everybody hurts
but can’t you see
i was just afraid
of becoming what i hate
becoming just like you
i don’t know what i’d do
i break my heart own heart - don’t do it for me
i’m content with loving you until you cannot fucking stand me
don’t care if it’s friendship – i just want your attention
can’t you see?
you’re the girl i want – the girl that i need
i wanna give you every single part of me
you’re the girl i want – the girl that i need
you’re what i need
i must admit
i always fall in love with people who treat me like shit
the feeling is growing – live in the moment
can’t you see?
the sunlight’s in your hair
please handle me with care
and we’ll go anywhere
can’t you see?
you’re the girl i want – the girl that i need
i wanna give you every single part of me
i am so afraid of everything
it is so confusing being me
there’s nothing left to say
are you okay?

girl i want/girl i need [rough]

@keepitinside built a beautiful song around such a simple loop omg

im basically the feature on this song lmfao

our own (w/ keepitinside)

04 Tightrope

(available on spotify)
drank too much
got the sickness
pray to god and his son for forgiveness
same crew but
another mistress
every day every night getting wasted
but i miss you
what did i do
fuck it up, laugh it off and i lost you
if i pull through
is it too soon
turn it up, close my eyes, and im with you

yo marvin
stop calling
sad iverson is ballin
in the corner of a room by himself
you are nothing but an empty shell
every night he going down to hell
fake love in a shit hotel
can’t believe how far he fell
you weak on the floor so you call her cell
“how you been”
“how you doing”
u been good
i been drinking
way too much
you think that id be
over u over u over u (8 calls, all you)
but i think about it everyday
yeah i never missed her anyways
yeah i never missed her anyways

call me up
stay over and we’ll
call it love
don’t matter if it
fucks me up 
the alcohol is not enough

fuck pride
and the other guy
i cried
i don’t remember why
tonight
ima try to hide
no slide
get frostbite
8 calls, all you
8 ball, all you
yeah i never missed her anyways
yeah i never missed her anyways

[spotify]

2 soon

@xscapexgoatx

fool me once
you can do it again
fool me twice
i thought the pain couldnt end
who told u it was worth it?
idk but u know
what's the fucking point to this?
what happened to all the progress?
ive felt enough for a life time
you got me hangin on life lines
and cast me out to the shore

who told u to fill me in with white lies?
watchu gunna do when everyone u love dies?
who told u anything about me?
who told u i never wanted to know?
i never wanted to go
i try my luck and i fold
heart made of bronze turned to stone
look in my eyes, see the cold
theres hella ice in my soul
and if you ever feel sorry u still know where to call

ur in califonia
its 4 in the morning
u think that im sleeping
but im waiting to pick up
and u dont even have to call me
cuz u know ill be
running in circles
til u finally come back home
u didnt seem alright
with the water in ur eyes
ur stubborness
ur golden kiss
is what kept me alive

im sorry for the way that i acted
if we could retract this
id be at ur door step
ill never feel ur touch again
but its fine
cuz ill love you til the end

Follow me <3

who told u? (ft. scapegoat) [prod. yesterday]

@tothegood

backed down to the corner of my closet
stay put, this'll all be over soon enough
my minds in need of something different
too bad its another lame occassion
teeth gold from the years that ive been smokin
wrist froze from the reason ive been chokin
bad bitch told me imma be a shinin star
but as of late, i dont seem to be goin too far

nothing lasts forever
for the worse and for the better

dont fuck with me
i gotta go, gotta flea
i guess theres no fight in me anymore
now i see

1000 words couldnt say
or nearly capture the way
ive come to feel on this day
u think u know dont u?
i can tell by ur smile
everyone told u
im stuck in denial

1000 words (prod. tothegood)

Why won’t you listen to me
When I tell you the truth
Your ears are ringing from talking too much
The words are slipping through your teeth and I don’t like them

(Chorus)
And I
Dont know what to say
Its hard looking at your face when you’re just wasting away
I want to say together well make it through okay 
But I don’t know
I dont

Below the water
your heads swimming
And I can’t hear a sound
I must be drowning
I think I’m getting sick
My hairs thinning out

my heart seems heavier today
looking at the circles under your eyes
And I worry every time I see you now

(Chorus)
And I 
Dont know what to say
Its hard looking at your face when you’re just wasting away
I want to say together well make it through okay 
But I don’t know
I dont

Charlie (messy demo)

Lowertown- Charlie (rough demo)

(available on spotify)
(baby i call in the dead of night
but you don’t need me like i need you
pray that i won’t be alone)

layin on the bed
waitin for your text (be alone)
babe there’s nothin left
faded im a wreck (be alone)

afraid what’s coming next
wished we never met (be alone)
laying us to rest but
baby i beg you (be alone)

2 soon (like i need you)
with the drunk call (pray that i won’t be alone)
in the middle of the night you
took it, my fault (be alone)
didn’t really mean to interrupt (be alone)
but if u change ur mind then hit me up (be alone)

pain, that’s an option
no time for nonsense
can’t ask you nothing
drank, feeling nausous
too many toxins
not even conscious
say nothin more, say nothin more baby

we’re better on our own
tonight im getting throwed (you don’t need me)
she never coming home 
stay with me (pray that i wont be alone)
say you’ll leave (you don’t need me)
(be alone)

(baby girl is saying that we just friends, that we just friends
if we fuckin are we just friends, are we just friends)

like i need u

produced, mixed/master by me
live drums by jordan davis
https://twitter.com/jordancd3_
https://www.instagram.com/jordandavis_98/?hl=en
cover art by ciel
https://cielxxx.com/


its a cold world we live in
had to learn about self forgiveness
im sold out on believin
so ill make what i can with these broken pieces

ive got all the time in the world
to figure it out
the root of my sorrow
the pain and the doubt

you cant live with that
i cant live without
u throwin it back 
while im turnin u out

i got a one track mind
and a wish to die
no tears to cry
when im left behind

dont know about tomorrow but i know bout today
you got me real fucked up but you know what ill say

leaves fall and im fallin apart
had to pick back up
think i gotta restart

yeah
this life is a race and we’re runnin in circles
im takin the leap over hurdles
that ive laid out myself all eternal

i send peace to my life and my loved ones
never got it off a trust fund
been about it since my day 1
imma leave my body when the night comes

leaves fall
and ive fallen apart
have to pick back up
think i gotta restart

if life has no meaning
why the fuck do i care?
yeah these people
these places
thats a reason to live

and these demons im facin
have a place in my life

but the road thats ahead
never comes to end
think that i lost it again

leaves fall and im fallin apart
had to pick back up
think i gotta restart

death calls
but im not by the phone
if you had one chance
would u take it and go?

SPOTIFY

restart

.・。˚*･༓☾thank you, my trashy earbud microphone ☽༓･*˚・。.

Lyrics: not sure who wrote this but from cliche tumblr poems
Your skin isn’t paper don’t cut it
Your size isn’t a book so don’t judge it
Your face aint a mask so don’t cover it
Your heart isn’t not a door so don’t lock it
Thank you
Beat by Yusei

bye music brb studying :(

T.L.C.

Worlds We'll Never Know

92\Ninety One - EP

ONE HOPE- Won't You Stay?

this is a continuation of my song car ride. enjoy.

Lyrics:
I wonder if ill make past 21 
I wonder if my parents think that I’m important
I wonder if my exes think about me often

I wonder If I ever knew what I could love 
I wonder if blew my chances up above
I wonder If I’ll ever really be enough 

I’m trying to be my own friend
Cause I know that Ill be with myself 
Until the very end
Until the very end 

I wonder what’s like to drink and smoke cigars
Or pass out in the grass on a strangers yard
Or how it feels to get high and look at the stars

I wonder what’s it like to give someone my heart
In fear that person could just tear it all apart
I wonder if Ill ever really come apart 

I’m trying to be my own friend
Cause I know that Ill be with myself 
Until the very end
I’m trying to be my own friend
Cause I know that Ill be with myself 
Until the very end
Until the very end 

I let you go
Please come back
I want a chance 
To start over 
Cause I know this can’t 
be all  over 

I wonder if ill make past 21 
I wonder if my parents think that I’m important
I wonder if my exes think about me often

I wonder If I ever knew what I could love 
I wonder if blew my chances up above
I wonder If I’ll ever really be enough 

I’m trying to be my own friend
Cause I know that Ill be with myself 
Until the very end
I’m trying to be my own friend
Cause I know that Ill be with myself 
Until the very end
Until the very end

I let you go
Please come back
I want a chance 
To start over 
Cause I know this can’t 
be all  over

I'm trying to be my own friend

I'm Trying To Be My Own Friend (prod. Ocean)[OUT NOW ON SPOTIFY]

quiet motions

Please be safe during this crazy pandemic. Social distance. <3

I made this song back in January, but this line up is crazy. I wrote this about when I was hospitalized almost 5 years ago. I didn't know whether I'd ever leave, but it helped me learn about myself and take things less seriously.

Lyrics:
And I won't lie, won't lie
I spend all my late nights
Tryna get this head right
I'm not distant, I just need time

Hoping you'd take me to Nurse Joy
Play with me like you do all your toys
Look at my direction I can't avoid
The line's getting closer

Leave me by my bedside
I can't even move my legs right
I get zoned out looking at the twilight shift
Six more bags, get me outta this rig

This feels like a movie, 21, what's going on
Just tell me how much longer does it last
I'm getting past this, find another man, shit
We need better casting, yuh

Hoping you'd take me to Nurse Joy
Play with me like you do all your toys
Look at my direction I can't avoid
The line's getting closer
Hit me up, take me out, I'm a wreck
Tell me all the things that make you sick
Mess it up, talk it out, be upset
I'm tired, get closer

I've been spending all this time
Just waiting for the perfect lines
To tell me what I want to do, pull through
Do I want to be the greatest?
I choose you!

You make me feel like a dream
Soaring through this, Butterfree
Take me out this hell I've been in
Fucked up, but you're next to me

Hoping you'd take me to Nurse Joy
Play with me like you do all your toys
Look at my direction I can't avoid
The line's getting closer
Hit me up, take me out, I'm a wreck
Tell me all the things that make you sick
Mess it up, talk it out, be upset
I'm tired, get closer

And I won't lie, won't lie
I spend all my late nights
Tryna get this head right
I'm not distant, I just need time
And I know it don't work
But I know what doesn't hurt
Just call me lazy, I'm not ready
I don't deserve

Hoping you'd take me to Nurse Joy
Play with me like you do all your toys
Look at my direction I can't avoid
The line's getting closer
Hit me up, take me out, I'm a wreck
Tell me all the things that make you sick
Mess it up, talk it out, be upset
I'm tired, get closer

NURSE JOY

Spotify

sleepwalk - santo and johnny

almost home

nightmares > reality

~ Aleebi ~
Spotify: https://spoti.fi/2zxVqVa
Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/aleebi
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aleebi
Twitter: http://twitter.com/Aleebi


[Lyrics]

I got nightmares that are better than
Everything that's going on
Turning off my 4 alarms
Checking every single one
Instagram is blowing up
Realize black mirror was
Deflecting all my images
I know I can change

I'm addicted to this fantasy
Of living in a battery 
Away from possibilities
Just take it I don't want to be

Caffeine and dopamine they
Get me through the fuckin' day
It gets me week to week
How the hell am I supposed to care about you?

They tell me 
Follow everything you love
It'll work itself out
Take on every challenge
Don't you let it bring you down
What am I supposed to do?
Moving out the backroom
I don't see the gain
I'm just taking up the volume

Am I tricked into this fantasy
The wasted opportunities
Away from integrity
Just take it I don't want to be

I'm addicted to this fantasy
Am I chasing dreams or my reality
Got me drinking thinking about things I do
Never could've made it without you 
I need you by my side and that's the truth

Every morning I wake doing the same shit, same things, same songs, same love it's not enough
Same friends, same views, same face, same drugs I'm losing touch 
I know I cant feel the pain, so why am I running away
Got me wasted, sipping gravity pulling me back anyway

Caffeine and dopamine they
Get me through the fuckin' day
It gets me week to week
How the hell am I supposed to care about you?
Caffeine and dopamine they
Get me through the fuckin' day
It gets me week to week
How the hell am I supposed to care about you?

Am I tricked into this fantasy
The wasted opportunities
Away from integrity
Away from integrity

caffeine and dopamine, pt. 2

Listen

caffeine and dopamine pt. 2 (with Aleebi)

I'm better without you, I'm sorry I loved you.

Lyrics:
Get off the cell phone
It's giving me anxiety
I can't prepare for
Anything you say to me
Get out the rosé
Bring out the lonely
Leave all the memories of me

But I won't forget
The last thing you said
A knife in my head
"I'm better without you
I'm sorry I loved you"
So what? Do I
Pretend that it never happened
Chasing the horizon

My falling star
Everything is distant
I don't want your wishes
Take apart
Everything that could've been
Don't leave any evidence
Leave out all your mess
And nail it to my chest
So I can live with my regret
I don't want to listen
I just want to feel this

Dropped out I'm a lost connection
I left you a message
Don't answer it 'cuz
I want you to notice all this lack of motive
You asked for me to stay with you
But you pray to god it's over
You play to lose
And I can't win

But I won't forget
The last thing you said
A knife in my head
"I'm better without you
I'm sorry I loved you"
So what? Do I
Pretend that it never happened
Chasing the horizon

My falling star
Everything is distant
I don't want your wishes
Take apart
Everything that could've been
Don't leave any evidence
Leave out all your mess
And nail it to my chest
So I can live with my regret
I don't want to listen
I just want to feel this

Falling star
Take apart
Falling star
Take apart

falling_star

Childhood Dreams

I don't care, I miss you

[Lyrics]
Where did you go?
You said you’d meet me
Let me know
Are you weary?

I’ll wait here
Forever
I’m trying
To savor

Late at night,
Just texting
Is he right?
Send message

Just tell me
You hate it
I’m waiting
To pay it

Don’t wanna waste your time
Don’t wanna waste your life
You got a new friend
I’m a loose end

Don’t wanna waste your time
Don’t wanna waste your life
You got a new friend
I’m a loose end

I know you only knew me
Summer, two three
I don’t care
I miss you
Maybe next time,
I’ll see you

And if it falls apart
Like a sunset
I’ll be hanging out
Where we lost it

I could figure out
We could let it go
Is he good enough
Just let me know

Don’t wanna waste your time
Don’t wanna waste your life
You got a new friend
I’m a loose end

Don’t wanna waste your time
Don’t wanna waste your life
You got a new friend
Ya well I’m a loose end

Don’t leave I’ll be here waiting (waiting)
Hold me stuck in my feelings (waiting)

Don’t wanna waste your time
Don’t wanna waste your life
You got a new friend
I’m a loose end

Don’t wanna waste your time
Don’t wanna waste your life
You got a new friend
I’m a loose end

(Got a new friend)
(I’m a loose end)
(Got a new friend)
(Waiting)

(Got a new friend)
(I’m a loose end)
(Got a new friend)
(Waiting)

loose_end

MUSIC VIDEO

It's sometimes so hard to believe in myself

[Lyrics]
I don't wanna do this on my own
I don't wanna do this on my own

I’ll meet you
On the west side
Come thru cuz
I’ve been waiting all night
I hope to god it’s alright
I’ve fallen down enough times

What you thinking
Just trust me
I don’t know if
You’re gonna love me
I hope to god it’s alright
I need you here in my life

One moment
Just stay waiting
All of my friends 
Won’t know what I’m saying
Can’t see you
Like I see them
Stayin alone
While everyone’s leavin

I don’t need fake routines
Just got dreams
Watch it go up without me
Figured out when to go
Heart of stone
Getting myself to you

I’ll meet you
On the west side
Come thru cuz
I’ve been waiting all night
I hope to god it’s alright
I’ve fallen down enough times

What you thinking
Just trust me
I don’t know if
You’re gonna love me
I hope to god it’s alright
I need you here in my life

Don’t want to say goodbye
Don’t want a reason why
I got messed up self esteem
Got to see my therapy
Like damn
Would I ruin my life for the gram
Just stick it in drive and take off to places
No expectations
I don’t wanna do this on my own

I’ll meet you
On the west side
Come thru cuz
I’ve been waiting all night
I hope to god it’s alright
I’ve fallen down enough times

What you thinking
Just trust me
I don’t know if
You’re gonna love me
I hope to god it’s alright
I need you here in my life

I’ve failed too much
To let this go
I’m making up for
Being so
Afraid of feeling
So alone
I don't wanna do this on my own
I don't wanna do this on my own
I don't wanna do this on my own

I don't wanna
I don't wanna
I don't wanna do this on my own
I don't wanna
I don't wanna
I don't wanna do this on my own
I don't wanna
I don't wanna
I don't wanna do this on my own
I don't wanna
I don't wanna
I don't wanna do this on my own

I don't wanna do this on my own

self_esteem

Lyrics by @v-e-i-l @homehomeboy
Composed by @edenbyeden @v-e-i-l @homehomeboy
Arranged by @edenbyeden
Visual Artwork by @hsean06