truly wonderful (feat. sham)

Give me some time,
Relax my mind,
No drugs, no thugs, so I let out a sigh,
Inhale the air,
Venerable stare,
Across from me, look at me, look at me, mirror
Folding my hands,
Tears drip down my pants,
Psychotic embodiment, who am I here,
Where am I there,
Why do I care so much, why am I never enough
How do I fare against all of my peers?

Thoughts like a pear, hourglass, roller coaster,
I’m coasting a wave I cant possibly steer,
I’m bearing the weight of my posthumous heir, 
I’m hearing them say that it’s time I be buried,
I buried a lot of my soul deep in childhood and never realized till the gravedigger dared,
To tell me I’m tossing and turning my casket but what I would find is just gravely unfair,

A kid in a casket covered in a mask, hidden how did this happen, 
I solemnly swear,
Happiness happens in habits so I bet the habits I happened on sharpened my spear,
Hardened my core,
Parental assault is perennial war,
Down deep in my forehead I fought it before, 
But if I fall in battle what good is my sword?

I swore I’d support it but suppose there is more to it, 
Maybe my death wasn’t caused by a person, 
No maybe my death wasn’t caused by my worsening health,
Maybe heaven decides when I’m living or hell decides why I be living imprisoned,
Maybe the people perpetrating my conscience that constantly comment, commanding my causes in all actuality cradle with care

The comets that constantly flame on my head,
Igniting my hair,
Maybe they extinguish with guardian air,
Regardless if I know one thing it’s ultimately the world is random and rounded like bingo,
Cause people don’t do what they do cause they feel it,
The people they do what they do cause they follow the pattern of people like sheep follow evil
Who follow the pattern of people before them who follow the pattern of people and so on,
I say this to say that the people you blame are just people of people who played in this game,
But the people who made me were made by the people who made them, who made, who made them, infinity
Time may be linear,
But you cant follow it linearly

As a young boy I lost all my faith,
Dying inside from the pain,
Given to me in a way,
That I could project all my rage,
Squarely at those that I blamed,
With physical evidence stained,
But day and by day and by day,
Intelligence showed me the way,
And the blame that I placed finally started to wain,

Realizations impatient in nature came racing, displacing my imagination,
Reality struck and an emptiness sunk deep inside of my soul, 
Now more like a black hole,
The people that I blamed,
Are the people that felt pain
Before I laid blame,
Before I felt pain,
They played the blame game,
The exact same thing,

They, feigned away, fading away,
Praying to the same saviour, that’s my saint,
Falling prey to the same anguished anger, hankering the pain,
Finding the way,
Fighting in vein,
Slicing a vein to feel some type of way, releasing the strain,
So when they tell me they’re blaming another I reply come again..
Nobody’s at fault,
And all’s not lost,
There’ll always be tomorrow to fight for our cause..

So give me some time,
Relax my mind,
No drugs, no thugs, so I let out a sigh
Inhale the air
Venerable stare
Across from me, look at me, look at me, mirror
Folding my hands
Tears drip down my pants
Psychotic embodiment, watching the audience,
Where am I there
Who do I care about, why don’t I hear ‘em out
Why do I fear, not being here..
Who do I fear, not being here

mirror, pt. I (salvation)

flashback

Soft Love In Paradise

I was raised in this world by God-fearing folk
In a harsh and unforgiving land
I did what I had to just to survive
And yes, I'll admit I'm a sinner

I took you for my wife, to have and to hold
And we swore to each other in the House of the Lord
To be true to one another 'til parted by death
And I knew even then we were sinners

And I worked and I toiled to carve for us a life
In this stone-hard world where we live
And sure, I transgressed, but I did it for us
I never would have guessed you'd betray my trust

You allowed yourself to be stolen by another man
You twisted the knife then you ran and you ran
Though I'm broken and bleeding I'm not one to forgive
And yes, I'm truly a sinner!

I'll survive long enough just to hunt you down
And I'll take him out in front of your eyes
Then you'll realise that breaking your vows
Is the gravest of sins for a sinner.

And I'll head off to the desert with my Bible and my gun
And I'll make my peace with Jesus
I'll join all the souls who strayed from the path
And you'll be all alone with all the sinners

You'll be all alone in a world of sinners...

Sinners

Live Reaktor/Maschine Jam by Rayman Vega
Produced by Rayman

Live jam performed September 27, 2020 in the Dining Room live in front of no one. Just me. Again.

Enjoy!

All music ©2020 Dancingimage Music. All rights reserved. Contact Rayman for sampling, remix, mashup.

21st Century Skitzoid Sandwich (live Maschine jam in the dining room)

SYMPHONY No. 1 - Sierra Morena - Mov. IV “Fandangos y Bulerías”
Música y Orquestación: Rafael Serrano

Symphony dedicated to the Sierra Morena; Mountain chain in the south of Spain with an impressive history and also legendary as a participant in countless legends. It is also the land of origin of the author of this Symphony.

Sinfonía dedicada a la Sierra Morena; cadena montañosa del sur de España de imponente historia y también legendaria al ser partícipe de innumerables leyendas. También es la tierra de origen del autor de esta Sinfonía.

truly wonderful (feat. sham)

Kotzer