EDM.

Lyrics:

We walk into the club
The sounds pound
Eardrums bursting 
Lights flash all around

The feeling is electric 
The crowd hectic
The DJ above the floor
His sick beats soar 

"Hold the door!!"

THAT'S HODOR

(Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor!)

Hodor 

The DJ is Hodor.

It's Kristian Nairn
His face calm
His beats like a psalm
Melody in his palm 

The beat start rising
Lights mesmerising
It's so exciting 
Dance floor looks enticing

He opens the door
To fantastic allure
That DJ!:

IT'S HODOR!

[outro]
(Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor!)

DJ Hodor

Come and get inundated with English elevated, you may be discombobulated, yet illuminated. Favorite tome is the dictionary, a book extraordinary, vital for works literary, where one needs to be visionary.

I sound stupendous, but most people think I am being disingenuous. But they are only jealous, because their speech is horrendous. I attempt to stay modest, though I sound a bit pompous, but if I am being honest, plain English sounds the oddest.

Elevated English
Makes me sound distinguished
My passion cannot be extinguished
It is something I will not relinquish

My usage is egregious
But I sound so prestigious
I am not being facetious
I am just a genius

My vocabulary is immense, people believe I am intense. They do not have common sense and I do not sit on the fence. I avoid words that are plain, because using them makes me insane. They are so very mundane, so from their use I refrain.

Elevated English
Makes me sound distinguished
My passion cannot be extinguished
It is something I will not relinquish

My usage is egregious
But I sound so prestigious
I am not being facetious
I am just a genius

Elevated words are not obsolete, 
And using them is a treat. 
To me they sound so sweet, 
Like a morning bird's tweet. 

These words that I propose,
Are more useful than you suppose. 
Sweet as summer's rose, 
They make beautiful prose.

Elevated English
Makes me sound distinguished
My passion cannot be extinguished
It is something I will not relinquish

My usage is egregious
But I sound so prestigious
I am not being facetious
I am just a genius

Elevated English rap

I was watching Underworld and this song popped into my head.

Glam metal.

Lyrics:

"5 thousand years ago two brothers walked this Earth:..."

Ko-ran!
The eldest, stood proud and tall!

Pod-sha!
The younger, with his golden maul!

Ko-ran was Bitten by a Bat:  
He became The first Vampire.
Pod-sha was Bitten by a Wolf: 
He became The first Werewolf.

This isn't their story....

I'm just telling you for exposition.....

Anyway.....

This is the story of Ken.

Ken.

This story is about Ken. Their younger brother. 

Small and weak.

Ken was Bitten by his Karen neighbour while gardening!

Karen's carnivorous clamping chompers conveyed crippling corrupting Karen Chi Concisely compressed into Ken's Conscious Core.

He became:

The first Were-Karen

(Were-Karen)

Ken. Ken. Ken. Ken. Ken. Ken. The Were-Karen.

Ken died 24 hours later.

In excruciating agony...

His brothers didn't even turn up to the funeral.

Which I thought was a dick move.

So, yeah. That's the whole song.

[End]


This song contains spoilers for Brandon Sanderson's novel The Way of Kings. If you haven't read it, I highly recommend it. 

In Roshar, the land of storms,
Kaladin the hero was born.
Beloved by his father and mother,
He went to war to save his brother.

But Tien met his demise,
By the command of the lighteyes,
And despite his bravery,
Kaladin was sold into slavery.

He was sent to the bridge crews,
Oh, and there his despair grew,
He went to meet his fate,
But knew it wasn't too late.

With Sylphrenna at his side,
Kaladin fought the darkness inside,
He spoke his oath to make a pact,
And Kaladin never looked back.

Life before death,
Journey before destination,
Kaladin Stormblessed,
fought the desolation.

Marked by the brand of shash, 
Kaladin learned how to lash,
Now he runs with the wind and rain, 
across the shattered plains!

Kaladin became the leader of bridge four,
And swore they would see death no more,
He tried to warm his bridge crew,
With talks and hearty stews,

Despite his feelings of despair,
He knew inside that he did care.
He became a knight radiant,
So he could protect the innocent.

And when Dalinar was betrayed,
Kaladin was bold and brave,
Despite their orders to retreat,
Kaladin battled sure defeat.

He rescued the lighteyes,
His courage earned him a captain's rise,
And despite his slave brands,
Kaladin was put in command.

Life before death,
Journey before destination,
Kaladin Stormblessed,
fought the desolation.

Marked by the brand of shash, 
Kaladin learned how to lash,
Now he runs with the wind and rain, 
across the shattered plains!

Kaladin Stormblessed (spoilers) (epic bard song)

Give me your rapt attention,
While I praise a great invention.
My pressure washer, I adore,
And I use it to do my chores.

It's dangerously electric,
And uses water force kinetic,
It's a new toy for my garden hoard, 
That needs a long extension cord.

It doesn't take much time,
To blast away the dirt and grime,
It has no fancy tricks,
I just point and click.

Cleans patios in a flash,
It was worth the cash.
My pressure washer's number one,
And using it's so much fun. 

Washer, high pressure,
Is truly a treasure,
It can be terrifying,
But it's mostly satisfying .

German designed. 
I'm so glad it's mine,
I use it for everything,
Cuz It gives the best clean.

Oh yeah!

My pressure washer gives the best clean!

I said goodbye to the hose,
Cuz the windows glow.
I said goodbye to dirty scars,
Cuz I have a shiny car. 

It's too good to be true,
Cuz the pavement looks brand new.
It's like a perfect dream,
Cuz my retaining walls gleam.

Washer, high pressure,
Is truly a treasure,
It can be terrifying,
But it's mostly satisfying .

German designed. 
I'm so glad it's mine,
I use it for everything,
Cuz It gives the best clean.

Oh yeah!

My pressure washer gives the best clean!

High pressure washer

EDM Metal.

Lyrics:

Hickory Dickory Dock. I have a REALLY large clock. It ticks all the time. It swings in pendulous rhyme 

My clock is VERY large. It pleases my wife Marge. She looks at it sway. She FIDDLES with it every day.

Come look at my clock! It's so large. (IT'S SO LARGE)
Touch it if you want. (YES PLEASE)
People come in a flock. (WE COME TOGETHER)
When they see my magnificent clock.

(OH WHAT A GLORIOUS CLOCK!)

Clock. Clock. Clock. Clock. Clock. Clock.

My clock has never needed repair. My clock makes people stare. My clock is very clean. No dust, just a polished sheen.

My clock is important to me. I clean it regularly. I polish it diligently. My clock you can never unsee.

Come look at my clock! It's so large. (IT'S SO LARGE)
Touch it if you want. (YES PLEASE)
People come in a flock. (WE COME TOGETHER)
When they see my magnificent clock.

(OH WHAT A GLORIOUS CLOCK!)

Clock. Clock. Clock. Clock. Clock. Clock.

I got my clock from my father. He got it from his father before...

"It's an old, but well maintained large and heavy clock"

I keep it well lubricated, to make sure that its animated.

This large clock makes my day. With it I always play. Please won't you stay. You'll not be in my way.

Around my clock people do lay. In an relaxed way. In rhythm they sway. Then they have fun and play!

"Guess what time it is?!!!!!"

Clock. Clock. Clock. Clock. Clock. Clock.

They get down on their knees. My clock keeps them pleased. They never are teased. There's a faint smell of cheese.

Cheese. Cheese. Cheese. Cheese. Cheese. Cheese. 

"I think the smell is from the mice that live in the clock."

Come look at my clock! It's so large. (IT'S SO LARGE)
Touch it if you want. (YES PLEASE)
People come in a flock. (WE COME TOGETHER)
When they see my magnificent clock.

(OH WHAT A CLOCK!)

OH WHAT A MAGNIFICENT CLOCK!

My clock

Trance Symphonic Power Metal 

Lyrics:

"We interrupt your regularly scheduled program with breaking news"

We didn't see it coming
Barely noticed darkening skies 
When the Apocalypse started happening
It took us by suprise

A Gigantic Red Phase-Shifting Texta-like Marker 
From another universe 
Is flying around, marking 
And it's slowly getting worse

That Gigantic Red Phase-Shifting Texta-like Marker 
Must be low in ink
'cause the world's not turning red
It's only turning pink

"Think about that, folks"

"Rats just look like walking penises"...

"With teeth"

"Strawberries look ripe. But they're not."

"The makeup industry is shot"

A Gigantic Red Phase Shifting Marker 
From another universe 
Is flying around, marking 
And it's slowly getting worse

Oh! The Phase Shifting Marker 
Is slowly getting darker
As it blots out the sun 
People start to run
It flies across the sky
Smearing pink with a cry!

"Did I mention that it talks? It screeches very specific, very intimate secrets about random people, whilst pointing at them with its gnarled hands...."

"Did I mention the hands?"

"It has penis fingers"

A Gigantic Red Phase Shifting Marker 
From another universe 
Is flying around, marking 
And it's slowly getting worse.

And it's slowly getting worse!!!

"Did I mention the smell?"

Turning pink

Jazz EDM Metal.

Lyrics:

The God of Sex sat on their Carnal Throne.
Lust's steaming mist, the smell of moan.

Surrounded by guards with spears erect.
Their god they love, Their god they protect.

One guard stands proud!!

(So very proud)

This Champion is large. 

The Champion is really large...

By large, I mean they have huge......... 
appendages.

Gigantic. Vein-ey appendages (Wow)

Well, this champion is a sexual vampurian....

Which is like a vampire/rogue.....

Lots of sexual energy.

Like Astarion from Baldur's Gate 3. But not exactly like Astarion. 

Different enough from Astarion so that there's clearly not a copyright infringement.

So I'm saying that this "Vampurian character".

(Not Astarion).

Is a sexy vampire..

(With huge appendages!)

Vampurian!
The face ripper
Vampurian!
They're a great kisser
They know what to do
To see you through.

Vampurian is this stunningly, sexy, beautiful, epic being with huge appendages.

One day Vampurian thought "screw it!...

Why not stick the thick end of my really huge traffic cone over the wet, slick, salivating maw of a spore beast, where inside a demon baby slept...

They did this because it's best to leave demon babies alone when they sleep....

Vampurian was putting up a hazard cone...

As per WHS policy.......

Demons take care of each other...

Especially their young. ..

They may be demonic sex demons from hell's steamy depth, but they're not savages....

I should introduce myself...

I'm Vampurian's assistant.

I filled out the WHS forms after they set up the traffic cone.

Using their huge appendages....

(Appendages)

I received a certificate of recognition for those forms.

It said "well done on your recent efforts". Signed by:

Vampurian!
The face ripper
Vampurian!
They're a great kisser
They know what to do
To see you through 

I collect semen.

It's a very misunderstood hobby.

There's ample semen lying around, especially with all the huge appendages. 

(So much semen).

I have whole rooms full of semen...

I also like turtles.....

But now they tell me I can't like turtles just because someone else famously liked turtles on social media already....

Fascists...

Do you want to see my semen collection?...

No?....

O.K.....

Oh, you're leaving?

Surely not before you meet:

Vampurian!
The face ripper
Vampurian!
They're a great kisser
They know what to do
To see you through 

With their huge appendages!




Vampurian (NSFW)

Generic birthday song

Lyrics:

Your head starts to rock
As it nods in time 
With the rhythm dancing to this rhyme

Your head starts to rock
As it nods in time 
With the rhythm dancing to this rhyme

The beat holds you dear 
Your foot starts to tap
The crowd begins to clap.

Clap. Clap. Clap. 

"That's nice."....

I'll tell you a story about the first slow clap.
The tale is a little gory but it really does slap.
So now behold the glory of the slow clap rap.

"It all began with a kid called Markus"...

(Clap clap clap)

Markus was a simple lad
He scurried about his ways
He was young and tall, well fed 
Living in Ancient Roman days

His family: Middle Class.
The Colosseum: Full of Delights
He could afford to see the mighty fights.

Move sight to the Colosseum
Markus is sight seeing
A normal day, a normal fight
He just popped in for quick Punch 'N Bite

His Seat he's gotten 
Drink he's not forgotten 
Snacks? Check!
Gladiator gets killed by spear to neck.
The Crowd is Bored
Silence has soared.

Not a sound but the cry as the gladiator did die.

Not a sound, and around everyone is looking down with a frown.

Quick Death is lame.
What a shame.

Crowd looks for blame.
The Emperor is Here
He's Expecting a Cheer
The Colosseum is in Silence. 
Tension is in the air
Rising Expectations of Violence 
The Emperor has a death stare.

Vibe's are flat
Tensions are about to break
The Emperor is Mad.
His jowls begin to shake

(Flap flap flap)

Markus sees a need
He acts with sudden speed
He loves his Rome 
He loves his home
His next actions may get him killed.
Or, his Dreams could be fulfilled!

He claps out a song
Hoping to get the throng to clap along!!!!
Slow. Clap. A. Long.

Clap

Clap

Clap

Clap

He starts it slow, just a single bold beat,
Eyes are turnin’ ‘round to the emperor’s seat.
Clap… clap… now the rhythm takes hold,
One boy with a plan, now the crowd's getting bold.

Clap

Clap

Clap

Clap

The crowd is clapping 
People are cheering 
A happy populous 
Is what the Emperor is hearing

He smiles at Markus
He gives a small nod
Markus smiles back
While muttering "What a miserable Sod"

From satire to scene-stealer, Marcus is like a dagger,
The slow clap echoes like a victory swagger.
Now the Roman's roar, like lions in the cage,
Markus just smirks, he owns this stage.
No crown, no sword, no blood on his hands,
Just the first slow clap to land, that made them all stand.

That's the tale of Marcus who did a slap of a clap.

And now this song has to wrap.

So CLAP!!!!!!



Clap

I am a lyricist. I make AI assisted music for fun.

Check out my in-draft musical on the playlist BDSM-The Musical. I'm slowly building the concept.

Clap

Magrov

Related tracks