Stark's Rap Battles | Complete Collection

-PRODUCTION/CAST-
freddy fazbear: AdamDRB

boyfriend: Fightmarker​ 


Written By: Michael Stark, ThatTacoGod & Raichous

Beat Produced By: InsaneBeatz

Vocals Mixed By: Fightmarker

Beat Mixed By: Freshy Kanal

Logo By: CannibalWorms

Thumbnail By: Commander Jacob

LYRICS:
ANNOUNCER
Let's give it up for Stark’s Rap Battles!
Freddy Fazbear
Versus
Boyfriend
Begin!

Freddy Fazbear (0:32 - 0:43):
Hey there kiddos, are you ready for some Freddy Fazbear Fun?
Think you got what it takes? Seems you’re pretty dum da-dum dum dum dumb!
Been a cult classic for years, this child can’t step to my stage to try it
Stalkin’ the halls, you know I’m makin’ the calls when I strike on the Mike… Schmidt
(Record scratch, beat cuts)

Boyfriend (Speaking 0:43 - 0:46):
(clears throat)
Uh, first of all, I’m nineteen..

Boyfriend (0:46 - 0:56):
And it’s Friday Night, I’ll survive alright, sittin’ through your verse’ll be no sweat!
Hold the Phone, Guy, I’ve faced my girl’s Dad, you think you’re a threat?
Of all the Freddyies who’ve Left-Lefty, I’d prefer Krueger R-Right now
But if beating this furry’s how it’s gotta be, you know what’s Up, you’re goin’ Down!

Freddy Fazbear (0:56 - 1:18):
Your rhymes fall flat just like PaRappa, but of your rappers, I’d prefer him
How ironic, a Flash-y DDR game can’t keep a rhythm!
Tried to make New Ground but now I’ll put you under: six feet
Cause I'm owning MCs more often than when your Shit Leaks!
I got the Spring-Lock on the win, chompin’ your lobe like a tasty lemon
Shock the audience so much Mark’ll go: “WAS THAT THE BAR OF 87?!”
Even Pico’s got you Schooled, think you rule? We’ll see when this simp’s crew falls
I mean, you put your life on the line, just because you had some blue balls?

Boyfriend (1:18 - 1:50):
With how Mangled your lore’s gotten, tell me, where’s this L in your timeline?
‘Cuz when rockin’ rhymes’s in my storyline, I’ll set your soul free when I drop the mic
Week after week I spit it Sick!, night after night your spirit sits
Withering, wasting away like your games, but I'll put an end to your gimmick quick!
I’ve fought against hitmen and demons, you think you scare me, Casper?
You can take your clan of Afton gaspers and have ‘em bowin’ down to the spittin’ master
(Yawn) You’re as boring as your gameplay, Sit N’ Survive, rinse and repeat
But if you wanted to put me to sleep, you’d better think twice when I’m killin’ the beat!
I’m X-in’ out this bear’s eyes, even your band knows I fight hard
Puttin’ these Freaky robots in their place, call me the Friday Night Guard
Even after all these weeks I’m keepin’ the lead, just go back to your relevance staying eerie
With the flow from within I’m clinchin’ the win, and no, that’s not just A Theory!

Freddy Fazbear (1:50 - 2:01):
After Five Nights of Fridays, your Funk has run out of power
Workin’ 12 to 6 doesn’t make you slick, Balloon Boy’s clone would cower-
And stand there with his maw wide open, get the suit ready, blow the confetti
Time to leave another soul in your game, if anyone else should dare test Freddy...

ANNOUNCER
Who was the FUNKIEST on the beat?
Who do you wanna see battle next?
Well, you decide! 
(Funky ad-libs)
Stark’s… Rap… Battles!


All Five Nights At Freddy’s properties are owned by Scott Cawthon
All Friday Night Funkin’ properties are owned by ninjamuffin99

Freddy Fazbear (Five Nights At Freddy’s) vs Boyfriend (Friday Night Funkin’) | SRB

-PRODUCTION/CAST-
Henry Stickmin - Mancha (UBERocity)
Phil Eggtree - Fightmarker​

Written By: Michael Stark, M!CAH, & Mason G

Produced By: Epistra

Mixed & Mastered By: Freshy Kanal

Logo By: Cannibal Worms

Cover By: Commander Jacob

Lyrics:
ANNOUNCER
Let's give it up for Stark’s Rap Battles!
Henry Stickmin
Vs
Phil Eggtree
Begin!

HENRY STICKMIN
The father of Newgrounds is bound to ground this unpunny Flash hack
Who thinks he can step to Stickmin, guess he hasn’t seen my clap back!
Henry chooses Gas Raps to combat Phil’s not-so-Swift sadness
Even your OG design adds up to complete Madness!
I mean, you’re messing with the best mercenary since Red or Blu
My games are a blast when I bring laughs, no one can say the same about you
So riddle me this, if you can, we know you’re not the sharpest bulb in the shed
How can you claim to have fame when you’re put to shame by another egg?
Who’s got a 98% rating on Steam? Me!
Who’s game birthed a dev team and a whole company from a meme?
But then who’s schtick got old fast with each recurring scheme?
Cuz it’s not me who’s cranking sequels just to make ends meet, geez!

PHIL EGGTREE
A whole decade for your first words? I must say, I’m thrilled
In this scrap you’re getting capped, regardless of the gimmicks you instill
Just a bully taking dollars, but got no digits on the weight scale!
So come at me, stick bug, this loss’ll be your 348th fail!
Spitting colder than Zack- er, hotter than Zack, a twig’ll get snapped when I’m on the attack
But if I tried to sit through your whack class I’d end up falling asleep on the track!
Stickmin’s just a Ghost Inmate, so there’s no need to keep my guard up
Hard to Escape Prison when you’ve been surrounded by my bars, huh?
I’ll still be the one collecting coin, while you’re lacking common cents
And after all your countless antics, I’d think you’d grasp some common sense
With all those video game tie-ins, you constantly seem to harp
For one who prides himself on intelligence, that wasn’t very… pointy
Once I crack the case of this basketcase, then he’ll truly see-
That when it comes to tricking teachers or ditching class, I always have the key!
No Valiant Hero, you snitched on the army just to pinch more cash
Just a selfish thief with jealous deeds, I’ve got this in the bag! (Ha!)

HENRY STICKMIN
I toppled the Toppats, Government, Wall, you know I got the sleek flow too
Your whole deal is “bargain bin Ferris Bueller hit with a dash of Pico’s School!”
But if you really wanna compare us, I’ll serve this Egghead over easy
My countless achievements to your minor victories? Hmmm, lets see:
Small startup gains some traction, gauging YouTubers’ reactions
Yet you couldn’t hold a fraction to the sweet deals that I’m packin’
Banks, Prisons, Airships, Complexes, I’ve beat them all, and then-
What did you do, that’s new? Oh yeah! Escaped school… again...
Priceless gems? I steal em; Brighter friends? You need em
I’m Breakin’ Banks and taking tanks, you use plot holes for your freedom!
No matter what you point and click, I top your “Legacy Edition” any day
But it seems like I had no trouble “Completing the Diss-ion” anyway!

PHIL EGGTREE
This beaver’s spittin’ ‘gainst this bread crumb from the internet’s trash can-
Now after countless parodies, this rash distraction’s at his last stand
Tried to capitalize on nostalgia, relying on old, tired game cliches
While I’ve been going strong for many years and I’m still free to play! (Ay!)
Your lines are paper thin, cutting less than your “valid stingers”
I’ve seen sicker stick figure spitters come out of Salad Fingers
No matter what the timeline, that whole verse was your lamest sad jam
Mission Failed! You shoulda stuck with Charles if you wanted the Greatest Rap Plan! (Oh!)

ANNOUNCER
Who was the Flashiest?
Who do you wanna see battle next?
Well, you decide! 
This has been Stark’s Rap Battles, we’ll see ya next time!

Henry Stickmin vs. Phil Eggtree | SRB

-PRODUCTION/CAST-
Bowser Jr. - Swoldow EVGRB
Lancer - GamingPlush64
Bowser - Alex M.
King Spade - Mr. Klock​

Written By: Michael Stark, Mason G, CannibalWorms, Fightmarker, Raichous, & GamingPlush64

Produced By: Dr. Dee

Mixed & Mastered By: Mr. Klock​

Logo By: Cannibal Worms

Cover By: Commander Jacob

Lyrics:
ANNOUNCER
Let’s give it up for Stark’s Rap Battles!
In the left corner, we have, Bowser Jr. and King Bowser
Vs
Lancer and King Spade
Begin!

BOWSER JR.
I’m gonna hop in my Airship and blast these Spades to pieces
Cuz even my Bullet Bills travel faster than your releases
All my cannons and minions are gonna scare you like King Boo
Your dad had to command his in order for them to like you
We’re gonna delta-ruin you, you can say we’re spittin’ fire
You behave not like a king’s son, but as a Jevil for hire!
Biting your face off like Susie, better get your bucket ready
And don’t rely on your father, with a bond that unsteady
Your maturity at this rate won’t make you “son of the year”
I'll fold this deck of cards so that they never interfere
Why don’t you work on evil speeches if you think you’re so Clover
In conclusion, you’re just a loner, leftover, seceding crossover

LANCER
You clowns’ll get thrashed when I take my bike and bulldoze
You’ll be Koopa-Trippin when you stumble over your Dry Flows
Nintendo's ace in the hole, only dug out with a spade
To rehash his bratty role in Smash and games nobody played
Same plot, same hero, same villain, same stencil
Acting like a Spooky Sword, but raps Halloween Pencils
Now I can’t say tier two curses, but I swear we’ll be your doom
I can’t take you seriously because you’re small as a shroom
Don’t you ever give up? You’re in my Shadow, that’s no question
And it’s fitting you’re a junior, cuz in this battle you’ll be second
So here, read the signs, it’s about time you found your answer
“Ho ho ho! Well if you’re reading this you’re dead!”, signed, Lancer

BOWSER
Alright Slugger, time for me to leave this figment out of luck
“LoOk At Me! Im InDiE!” just means you’re a Delta-level schmuck
You little brat, shut your trap before I slam you to the ground
And as for papa, well, he plays second fiddle to King Round! 
We reuse elements? (Ha!) You have your son’s laugh but deeper! 
Knock down your house of cards, as the conflict gets steeper
You need the Eastern Fountain to keep rule over your land?
I order the kidnappings of royalty with the wave of my hand
Check my castle, you ain’t got Jack, I’ve got way more traps than you could stab at
You Kris-crossed the gaming scene, now Toby's mad at MatPat
You wanna be a better rapper? Why don't you give the truth a whirl? 
You will always be inferior, no one can choose who they are in this world. 

KING SPADE
It’s the Bad Guy’s verse, I’ll show you some real villainy 
Dis-Kaard your bad raps, would you really hurt my mini-me?
Double Dash out this battle, that’s all you can seem to do
I’m a true Darkner! (Yeah!) My subjects are more useful than your crew!
When it comes to the best villains, you’re no diamond in the rough
You’re too soft and emotionally vulnerable, HeartsDonut? (Evil Laughter)
Do us all a favor, jump off the edge and press Down B
All anyone needs to know is that chopping down your bridge is the key
I feel for your motherless thunderous kids, King Bowser, really, I do
But unfortunately my loyalty resides solely with my Knight's crew!
I thoroughly enjoyed crushing you turtle scum in this battle
Now kneel before your King and become my personal chattel

ANNOUNCER
Who took the rap throne?
Who do you wanna see battle next?
You decide!
Stark’s Rap Battle

Bowser Jr. & King Bowser vs. Lancer & King Spade (YouTube Release) | SRB

-PRODUCTION/CAST-
Michael Myers - Fightmarker
The Immortal Snail - JustGamer

Written By: Michael Stark, JustGamer, Nooby, Swoldow EVGRB, 01Tyler10, Eric The Audible, Kamren the Person, Triple-Stabber, & Joosh

Produced By: Dansonn

Mixed & Mastered By: Fightmarker

Art By: Nooby & 01Tyler10

Logo By: Cannibal Worms

Cover By: Michael Stark

Lyrics:
ANNOUNCER
Let’s give it up for Stark’s Rap Battles!
Michael Myers
vs
The Immortal Snail
Begin!

MICHAEL MYERS
...
...
...
...

THE IMMORTAL SNAIL
Now that Michael’s done with his warm up, this gastro-pog can escargot
You’ve been thirsting for the same girl since your twenties: Halloween H20
But if you’re tryna get lit, then I can spit some more fire
So go ahead and keep breathing on the mic, ASMyeRs
Your series started smooth, but now you’ve seem to have run your course 
How ironic Rob Zombie took your franchise and turned it to a rotting corpse
Got the conch shell drip, can't leave me stabbed in the back 
You’re more of a pussy than Mike Myers playing the Cat In The Hat 

MICHAEL MYERS
I’ve had it with your “tough schtick”, and they say I’m sluggish?
How are you acting so salty when you can’t even touch it?
Well this ain’t Christmas, but you better make way for this haunting slasher
People strategize to fight me, you’re put to rest with just a Saltine, cracker
I’m evil, and lethal, your attempts to cut me are feeble
Got sequels and prequels to make fans squeal, we’re not equal
I’m scary, you’re Gary, you just squirm there while I’m ruthless
Just another I’ve set ablaze- a second Dr. Loomis

THE IMMORTAL SNAIL
I’m surprised you wanted to fight me, didn’t shells make you blind? 
Now you’re tryna bust a rhyme? But you’d get your ass beat, you’re not that guy
I could just wait for your resetting timelines to kill you again 
Then maybe after one last damn retcon, Halloween can finally end…

MICHAEL MYERS
I got carved into horror by Carpenter, you just a stupid meme
Relevance barely getting by, by the skin of its Rooster Teeth
Just like all the memes before you, you’re completely forgettable
And your win’s like your whole existence, fully hypothetical


ANNOUNCER
Who was the slowest?
Who do you want to see battle next?
Well, you decide!
This has been Stark’s Rap Battles, we’ll see you next time!

Michael Myers vs. The Immortal Snail | SRB

I make rap battles mostly

Original stuff on the way