She Finally Found Her Worth

out of my mind (prod. pilotkid)

intermission (prod. brokebwoy)

Bogies (Prod. Imdead)

tmr + euph (prod. alanfor)

try to be happy
honestly i'm even doing it now,
mom are you proud of me?
what the world could to your child...
i aint been balancing, i been falling down for a while,
try to be happy?
haven't done that shit while,
mom are you mad me?
supposed to be the man of the house,
but i don't wanna be, 
born to walk around w denial,
because im honestly, forced to walk around w a smile,
im in and out of, 
mom and dad prolly hating me now,
and i dont know, what im doing rn, is this a story or a show? 
i bet its putrid and foul at least,
thats what happened to me on that winter day last year, and there aint a soul that i told about how it get so weird,
and i dont know, what im doing rn,
is this a story or a show?
well, (well)
i dont know,
yeah, (yeah)

id do anything to get to where i was last year, and there aint a soul that i done told about, all my fears/
and i aint all about,
all the shit u said last year,
tf you talking bout?
i suicided im still here.

well do i gotta be?
theres someone else inside of me, i think..
at least i think so, yeah
----

try to be happy
honestly i'm even doing it now,
mom are you proud of me?
what the world could to a child...
i aint been balancing, i been falling down for a while,
try to be happy?
haven't done that shit while,
mom are you mad me?
supposed to be the man of the house,
but i don't wanna be...

do i gotta be?

try to be happy (prod. austin friel)

i say the same shit all the time,
im somebody thats on the tv,
u were looking so divine, wondering why u even need me,
i was often out of line,
i'm not a fisherman who spending all their time, by the ocean,
i was hoping for a guy, who maybe made me feel alive,
he wanna fuck, i wanna cry, i fall in love a lil much, ive had enough of all the lies,
ive turned to rust, im not a diamond in the ruff,
im more the type to fuck it up, 
im more the type that turn to dust,
but yeah i trust that were divine,

so, 
if i die today, ill find a way in another life,
ill find a way to be anything but whats right,
in everybody's mind, 
i mean i'll find a way to keep fighting,
but i dont wanna lie.. if i have to i will though,
if u would read between the fuckin lines,
u would see that everything is just designed, for me and u, and u and me to feel like just a nevermind,
i need reminders, rewinding, i'm leaving u behind,
ill never die, 
a real loser, how u fuck up suicide?
like how i fucked up u and i,
im going crazy it aint a sign,
i was certain, but now im certainly out of my fuckin mind,
the curtains closed on this suburbia and murdered me alive,
prefer to know none of what im doing, i do it on the fly,
this life a show and its my favorite, but its dated,
i dont watch it anymore, i missed too many episodes i shouldve pressed record,
i shouldve pushed the door open wide, now what im settling for?
a forecast of rain, and 4 days till your at heavens door
yo,

now thats rather optimistic, 
looking god in his eyes he asked me whats the 3 wishes; is this a joke? cus ion read social cues well,
he said well yknow, make do with what u got, yo
so sadistic
stfu
----

redosing, shit i hate being sober for a second,
blah blah, something something about depression,
i say the same shit all the time im somebody thats on the tv,
u could look me in the eyes ion think that u gon read me,
if u looked me in the eyes u could notice im not here,
i checked out a while ago, 
im asleep but im not dreaming.
im asleep and nature shifted me into the wrong frequence,
im addicted to, anything that make me feel different,
so i listen to u, u was really one of the 3 wishes,
but,
only in your existence,
so now im in the back of the whip w all the wrong bitches,
lateral passing the last job i had to smoke swishers,
but i cant stop, its not for me ive had enough of all of this monotony,
im bout to walk around the fuckin globe despite the knobby knees/
im awfully far away,
from all the shit that i could say,
i wanna say it to ur face,
mhm,

im- scared to stick to a topic i jump from place to place, 
even the words up in my mind are getting erased,
and w my purpose and design i think that i was led astray, the wrong way is all i know it feels like home to me so..

i used to always run away, 
now im standing here in place,

its time to go i never noticed how to stay

even if u die, dont die (prod. unguntaye)

im running outta time again,
i been getting high again,
if u could stay with me, id be complete 
believe ill die again,
if i could have another life align w my mother please, at least, 
i need somebody who could teach how to love and leave it all behind me,
trying not to cry i wonder why its all performity,
my stoneface a show, but it's stuck after too long,
on the way to being ghost again, somebody save my soul,
feel the lotion on my-
yo/
im overloaded, where im going? yeah
well tell me if u know,
cus i think i'm getting close,
i think i'm getting close 
yo
----

what tf am i doing?
(who knows?)
well i feel so alone...
(its true)
there's no one here but the music baby...
(yeah)
do u feel at home?
(no)
i know i dont...
i know i dont...
i know...
-----

im the type to throw away it all, its blasting off again,
ill do today just to play it off, yeah ill play pretend,
i used to say like anything, but nowadays i contemplate it on the fence,
i'm being taken with the wind,
im flat stanley sliding underneath the door i needa dip,
and what a whore!!
u would say to me if u knew what i did,
come on yo, that an unhealthy amount of sucking dick,
and better PAuSE
try to call my ass a faggot once again,
i need applause,
i need a fuckin friend,
i needed god, but he fuckin dead.

everybody...
in a single file line please.
ima kill myself if it means that i would die free,
i dont need no help, i needed help but now its all me,
i dont need no help i planned a funeral for john breen,
i dont tell a soul, that its really been a long week, and,
all i do is hit the bowl, tryna feel good,
and i been on a roll, but honestly im really hiding,
im only on a roll, on a roll bc of highs, and the lies i been wondering if anyone will find me,
(no way)
i never coloured in the lines, rip the paper off the page just to see if theres a sign,
ill sign a dotted line,
ill find, a shoulder i could cry on,
in time, i'll find, somebody i'll rely on.
yo (yo)
-----

what tf am i doing?
well i feel so alone...
there's no one here but the music baby...
do u feel at home?

home (prod. dexter yu)

i wanna fight for your attention again,
i aint been as clever w the shit that im writing,
cause now i only write to get shit out of my head,
im sorry to my mom and dad i know that you didnt like it,
"cause why this child always in and out of their head?"
"the second that you was born, we were stuck in a crisis"
i feel like im the reason mom and dad are depressed,
if they could see who i could be, i dont think that they'd like me,
but they always figured i was the best,
its gotta be that im the problem i wish i was a lightbeam,
and i wish i was everything you wanted, at best
im just a burden that makes it so,
you'll never sight see,
hey, its maybe just a part of the quest,
no disrespect,
i hate my name, i know that it was my grandpa's
i really wanna change it, but im scared of the rest,
i fear my father will remember that, i was bad son.

----

i wanna fight for your attention again
i wanna fight for your attention again, yeah

and i dont what i should say to you, 
and i dont what i should say to you, 
i wish that was but i wasnt able to, i wasnt capable,
and as a family who we praying to? for real,
and as an animal society's got me living life in fear.
im always faded i dont know if i could live another year, i know that life is just amnesia i aint nothing like whats here,
its kinda weird i feel defeated though.

----

i wanna fight for your attention again,
i aint been as clever w the shit that im writing,
cause now i only write to get shit out of my head,
im sorry to my mom and dad i know that you didnt like it,
"cause why this child always in and out of their head?"
"the second that you was born, we were stuck in a crisis"
i feel like im the reason mom and dad are depressed,
if they could see who i could be, i dont think that they'd like me,
but they always figured i was the best,
its gotta be that im the problem i wish i was a lightbeam,
and i wish i was everything you wanted, at best
im just a burden that makes it so,
you'll never sight see,
hey, its maybe just a part of the quest,
no disrespect,
i hate my name, i know that it was my grandpa's
i really wanna change it, but im scared of the rest,
i fear my father will remember that, i was bad son.

500 days of summer

naakwood

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