Fandom: The Dark Crystal 
Character: The Skeksis

VERSE I
MUST LOVE DOGS, MUST USE MULTIS
IM A MUPPET, PLUS MY WHOLE VIBE MUCH TOO CULTY
YOU GULLY? YOU GROTTAN, YOU ROTTEN, YOU MUSTY
YOU MUST BE, YOU WANT ME ON YOUR BEATS?! DON'T INSULT ME
YA GIRL LOOK LIKE AUGHRA
YOU CUCKS PROLLY OUGHTA-- ALL OF YA--WONDER IF I FUCKED THE ALL-MAUDRA
WE GODS AND WE MONSTERS, YOU ALL GETTIN STOMPED UP
YALL FORGOT I GOT SKEKMAL IN THE ROSTER
KID, IMMA SINK YOU LIKE THE BIS TO THE MARCK
YOU A BITCH AND A MARK, MY CRYSTAL IS DARK
MY JERRLY IS INFINITE, INTRICATE, SHARP
FEAST WHILE YOU DRINK FIZZGIG PISS IN THE DARK
AND FROM ME AINT NO SYMPATHY GATHERED
YOU A SIMP, IMMA BURN YOU INTO CINDERS AND ASHES
IMMA SHIT ON YOU BASTARDS, THE RITUAL MASTER
SHIT, EVERY LAST MINUTE THAT IM SPITTIN IM BLASTED
YOU'RE PLASTERED, THINKIN THAT YOUR DISS'LL WIN EM OVER?
IM THINKIN THATS A MISS, YOU AINT SHIT WHEN YOU SOBER
I GUESS THEY NEVER MISS HUH
MISSED THE LAST DECADE OF NERDCORE, I AINT MISS MUCH
SMOKING BLOOKA ROOT
YOU LISTEN TO FETT'S VETTE, I LISTEN TO BAZOOKA TOOTH
SKEKBUTO, THE AVIREX SKEKSIS
GOT A ARMALIG THAT PULL THE LEXUS

HOOK
AND I DON'T MAKE CONCEPT TRACKS, I'M A CONCEPT
RAP WITH A CONDOR HEAD FROM YOUR MOM'S BED
(BOMB SHIT) YES, SIP HER ESSENCE, PROLONG SHIT
YON SKEK CALL IN GARTHIM, NOT A BOMB THREAT
PLUS, FUCK A THRA, AUGHRA, FUCK A GELFLING
VULTURE CLAW SWIPE RIGHT, NICE, FUCK A GELFLING
SOMETHING ELSE NOT FROM YOUR PLANET THAT LANDED
DEMANDED TO GET SHIT--AND GET WHAT'S DEMANDED

VERSE II
AND WE LANDED, AS IN, GOT THE LAND
SO WE ASK AND YOU ANSWERED, NOBODY'S SAYING DAMN SHIT
RANCID, ONE STEP FROM CANNIBALIST ANIMUS
FEASTIN ON A POD PEEP PIECE LIT BY CANDLESTICKS
NEXT, SKEKTEK TEXT "CHECK THE ANALYSIS"
GRAB A CASTLE GUARD TAP EM HARD FOR DIALYSIS
BETTER LIVING LONG LIFE (TIGHT) BIGGER PHALLUSES
(HYPE) CHILL IN CAVERNOUS MAD CRYSTAL PALACES
AND YOU VALOROUS, TRYNA BE MORALITOUS
SAD HOW THE WHOLE VAPRA POWER SITCH IS COUNTERFEIT
ACCURATE, SNAPPIN WHEN I STAB U WITH A MASSIVE SHIV
SAVAGE SHIT, PLUS THE COLOR PALETTE IS ANALAGOUS
BLACK MOLD WITH A LITTLE BIT OF JACK MODE
ACTING ATAXIC, I'M NASTY, I RAP SLOW
BRASH OLD MASKED-UP BASTARD WITH CASH FLOW
BACKS BLOWN, SNAGGLETOOTH GRIN LIKE A GLASGOW
AND YOU WACK BRO
TALKIN BOUT SKILLS, GRACE, TASTE WHEN YOU LACK THOSE
TELL A GRUENAK TO GET THE VIALS AND WE STASH THOSE
GOT A DUAL GLAIVE? BRAVE, SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASSHOLE
I'M MASTERFUL

VPC 7 Round 1

Muppet Ronin [Kabuto the Python and Beaker Sullivan] - Fizzgig Piss

Fire Sauce (feat. XoC) by Youth Chili Cook Off!

[Verse 1: Sweeney Toad]
We finally out the big house no longer have to sit out
And miss all the delicacies cause we committed felony
Just a little structure fire that Blockbuster found expired
Burned it down cause they were out of Mrs. Doubtfire

[Verse 2: Phlebia]
They told me not to make a scene
It’s not a big deal, I should stay serene 
But I raised my voice started acting mean
Got the manager trying to intervene
So I doused the place with gasoline
I set it ablaze with the nicotine
Flames orange red like tangerine
Charred to black like tourmaline

[Verse 3: XoC]
Me and my buddies coming straight out of the prison system, sorta feeling sad cause I never gotta visit in them, stomach sorta growling, feeling weak and my vision missing, maybe Taco Bell, for them tacos with the chicken in them

[Verse 4: Sweeney Toad]
First things first bet I gotta get me that chalupa     
Substitute the beef for black bean I’m a connoisseur
Of all the finest tastes I partake in the higher costs
Add the guacamole steak and don’t forget the fire sauce

[Verse 5: Phlebia]
Roll up to my hallowed venue
Take a quick peek at the menu
Several dozen cheesy options
Prices low like it’s an auction
Corn and queso  beans and rice
Baja blast don’t forget the ice
Swap beans for beef cause I’m alpha gal
Add cinnamon twists for the grand finale

[Verse 6: XoC]
So I’m standing in line and the menus all digital, stomach steady screaming, hunger pain feeling critical, daydreaming now, gonna eat til I’m really full, later, on the John, imma spray til it’s a shitty bowl

[Verse 7: Sweeney Toad]
Pull out the drive thru and spark up the doja
We about to dine oooo beautiful ambrosia
Taco-itis later I guess that’s the dire cost
I open up the brown bag THEY FORGOT THE FIRE SAUCE?!

[Rant 1: Sweeney Toad]
I was sitting in the car and I opened the Taco Bell bag and I was digging through the sauces. Mild, Hot, Diablo, but where the fuck is the fire? They forgot the fucking fire sauce! I just wanted some god damn fire sauce! Why can’t things ever just work out!
Everything I do, it just never works out! 
It’s like nothing ever goes my way and I’m sick of it all!

[Chorus 1: Sweeney Toad]
THEY FORGOT THE FIRE SAUCE!
THEY FORGOT THE FIRE SAUCE!
THEY FORGOT THE FIRE SAUCE!
LET’S BURN THIS TACO BELL DOWN TO THE GROUND!!

[Rant 2: Sweeney Toad]
And I just started getting pissed! And I was so pissed I forgot Phlebia and XoC were there. And Phlebia’s calling my name and I didn’t even hear it. He started screaming: MIKE! MIKE!! And XoC he goes: MIKE! what’s the matter?? And I go: All I want is fire sauce, and they wouldn’t give it to me!
All I wanted was fire sauce, just one fire sauce packet, and they wouldn't give it to me. 
Just one FIRE SAUCE!!

[Chorus 2: Sweeney Toad]
THEY FORGOT THE FIRE SAUCE!
THEY FORGOT THE FIRE SAUCE!
THEY FORGOT THE FIRE SAUCE!
LET’S BURN THIS TACO BELL DOWN TO THE GROUND!!

[Rant 3: Sweeney Toad]
SO WE SWERVED THE CAR BACK AROUND AND THAT WAS IT! I’M NOT GOING TO DEAL WITH IT ANYMORE! SO WE GRABBED THE GAS CAN OUT THE TRUNK AND WE BURNED THAT GOD DAMN TACO BELL DOWN TO THE MOTHERFUCKING GROUND!! (*Sirens* "PuT YoUr HaNdS Up")

[Verse 8: Phlebia]
The smoke rises, hear the sirens come to get me
Guess I blew my only opportunity to get free
Seems like it’s who I am,  I was born a fire bug
Not a killer, not a thug, not a dealer selling drugs

[Verse 9: Sweeney Toad]
Can’t believe we back, flop house penitentiary
Guess we never learn dropped out elementary
Pyromaniac need to throw out my lighter
Grew up with those GI Joes doused up on fire

[Verse 10: XoC]
Back in this prison, I’ve been given major sentence, 57 years, ima lose my independence, all I want are tacos and chalupas like I mentioned, never thought to break out this jail, but now I’m tempted

VPC7 Round 4

Youth Chili Cook Off! [Sweeney Toad, Phlebia] - Fire Sauce (ft. XoC)

Featuring Klofenpop & Big Fake

OH YOU THOUGHT YOUD BE THE BIGGEST FUCKIN FISH IN THIS LITTLE POND HUH
YOU LITTLE FUCKIN MONSTER
YOU MUST BE FUCKIN BONKERS
YOU PEACE FOR EIGHT YEARS AINT DO SHIT TO STAY IN TOUCH
AND NEVER CHECK WHATS COMING OUT
SURPRISE, YOU AINT THAT GOOD YOU LITTLE FUCK
OUT HERE REVIEWING AND CRITICIZING LIKE YOU'RE SOMETHING
MISTER TWO-LIVE-SHOWS, TWENTY-SEVEN-TAKES
AND ALL OF EM PUNCHINS
YOU MUNCHKIN, ONLY LOUD WHEN YOU THINK NOBODY'S AROUND TO CHECK THE SHIT
COMPRESSING AND DOUBLING UP YOUR VOCALS JUST TO SOUND BIG
TALKIN BOUT CRAFT
YOU HAVENT SWITCHED UP YOUR STYLE SINCE YOU STARTED IT
JUST GRADUATED FROM MOMS HOUSE TO AN APARTMENT
BUILT YOUR WHOLE REP OFF THIS SCENE AND OTHER ARTISTS SHIT
SPECIFICALLY OFF TRYNA MAKE THEM NOT FEEL LIKE A PART OF IT
SORRY TO YOUR DOWNSTAIRS NEIGHBORS FOR THAT DUDE RAPPIN ABOVE THEM
LEAST YOU GOT THE APARTMENT
ALL YOUR FRIENDS GOT FAMILIES WHO LOVE THEM
I KNOW YOUR STYLE
I KNOW EXACTLY HOW TO RUN UP ON YA
SNAKE YOUR DEFENSES
KICKIN YOUR SHINS LIKE ADESANYA
WASTING YOUR LIFE, YOU AINT A VETERAN JUST INVETERATE
JUST MAKIN MONEY OFF THE SCENE
AND THE FANS THAT YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN
TELL ME THAT BOBBY'S WRONG
SHOW ME A STREAM THAT YOU AINT HELLA BENT
JUST A SAD SOCK MUPPET FROM A SITE THAT'S NO LONGER RELEVANT
GAVE YOURSELF A NICE LITTLE OUT WHERE YOU DONT HAVE TO WRITE GOOD VERSES
BS BARS RAPPED IN A FUNNY VOICE, CLAIMIN IT'S ON PURPOSE
WHATS THE PURPOSE
STILL ACTING LIKE YOU THE MAN
YOU LOOK AND SOUND WORSE THAN THE JUGGALO RAPPERS YOU CAN'T STAND
I REMEMBER YOU WERE COMFORTABLE CALLING PEOPLE FUCKIN F****T N SHIT
ALMIGHTY! SUDDENLY TALKING ALL LIKE A SOCIAL JUSTICE ACTIVIST!
PRETENDING LIKE YOU GIVE A FUCK, YOU BASTARD, I THINK THAT'S THE BIT
TRYNA IMPRESS YOUR FRIENDS
YOU'D PROLLY HAPPILY GO BACK TO IT
LIKE YOU STOPPED SAYING BITCH TILL YOU HAD WOMEN HITTING YOUR MATTRESSES
HUH, THAT DIDN'T LAST DID IT
SPEAKIN OF WHICH, AN ASTERISK****
REMEMBER HOW YOU USED TO BE ALL OVER RAPPIN ABOUT FUCKIN
WHEN YOU HADNT SO MUCH AS BREATHED IN A GIRLS DIRECTION
THAT WAS SOMETHIN
WEAVIN SOME REAL LIES WITH ALL THOSE MONSTROUS SPINNERETS
TRYNA RECORD BEFORE NINE PM WHEN YOUR MOM TURNED OFF THE INTERNET
IN EFFECT...THIS WAS ALL DURING YOUR GILDED AGE
SO TELL ME WHAT IN THE FUCK MAKES YOU THINK YOU'RE WORTH A SHIT TODAY
YOU AINT A BATTLE VET
NOBODY HERE'S COMING FOR YOUR TITLES KID
EVEN THAT PIXEL GLASSES RAPPER'S PROLLY GOT MORE SPINE IN HIM
LUCKY YOU DON'T HAVE FEELINGS THAT I CAN HURT
YOU LITTLE SPITEFUL PRICK
THIS TRACKS A FAKEOUT JOKE
SO WHY YOURE SHAKING ALL WHILE YOU'RE WRITING IT
YOUR INSINCERITY'S TAKING UP TOO MUCH SPACE ON THE MIC
GOT PEOPLE LOOKING UP TO YOU FOR SHIT YOU DON'T EVEN LIKE (KABUTO!)
I SEE YOU SHRINKIN BACK FROM ME (KABUTO!) BETTER STAY COILED
AND KEEP CASHIN THOSE DISTROKID CHECKS SELLING YOUR SNAKE OIL

VPC7 Round 5

Muppet Ronin [Kabuto the Python, Beaker Sullivan] - Snake Oil

CruciA - Fly Together

CruciA - Astral Projection

Diary Of A Finesse Kid

HOOK (repeat 2x)
Who you gonna run to? Who you gon’ go get?
I’m a grown-ass man, you can’t tell me shit.
Who you gonna run to? Who you gon’ go get?
I’m a grown-ass man, you can’t tell me shit.


---

VERSE 1 (20 bars)

1. Who you gon’ “tell” on me—like I’m grounded from recess?


2. I pay my own bills; your report card don’t impress.


3. Mad ’cause I said “no”? Go ahead, go file your feelings—


4. Put it in a folder named “Control” with a password you keep missin’.


5. You threaten “I’m gon’ call”—call who? The Adult Police?


6. I been grown so long my knees got seniority.


7. I don’t do permission slips, I do decision flips—


8. Turn your ultimatum into origami, then I pitch it.


9. You want authority? Go buy it—mine came with age,


10. Yours come with a tantrum and a “look at me” page.


11. I’m 54, I done outlived peer pressure and trends—


12. I don’t fold for a rumor, I iron it and wear it again.


13. You tryna shame me? That’s a boomerang with no string—


14. Come back, hit your ego, now you mad at everything.


15. “I’ma tell!”—tell the mirror you hate my calm—


16. I’m grown… the only thing you can “tell” is I’m unbothered, dawg.
17) I outgrew fear when my beard turned salt,
18) You still threaten consequences you don’t even control.
19) This ain’t rebellion, it’s the freedom tax paid in full—
20) You can’t discipline a man who already pulled his own wool.




---

VERSE 2 (20 bars)

1. I’m grown-grown, not “act grown” ’cause I got a loud tone—


2. I got receipts older than your whole backbone.


3. You playin’ messenger? That’s cute—little carrier pigeon,


4. Tryna fly my business around town like it’s a mission.


5. But who you gon’ run to when the truth start joggin’?


6. I’m the “end of discussion” button—stop clockin’.


7. You want leverage? You need weight—yours helium talk,


8. Mine concrete—when I speak, even silence take notes.


9. I don’t argue with threats, I negotiate with boundaries—


10. Put a “Do Not Disturb” sign on your whole lil’ story.


11. You say “I’m gon’ expose you”—expose what, my grown?


12. I ain’t hidin’—I’m outside, daylight, ringtone.


13. I mastered the art of “nah” with a laugh on top—


14. That’s a double entendre: I’m “grown” and I “won’t be stopped.”


15. So go ahead, tell whoever—make it a group chat blast—


16. Drop-the-mic: can’t “tell on” a man who wrote his own class.
17) I don’t flinch at gossip, that’s toddler currency,
18) You spend it loud, I invest in my certainty.
19) You mad ’cause the leash broke? Nah, it never fit—
20) I’m a grown-ass man… tell who? You can’t tell me shit.

Run & Tell It ~ Apexitiez

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US Rap Hip Hop 2025 – American Trap Beat Mix #2962

Nobody Knew I was Heather - Peach Saliva

The full soundtrack to The Vampire at Chessington, with the lost chapel / corridor audio and station music. Here it is mixed from an original cassette production master, after the music dubbed with SFX.

This original station mix was lost after the ride was upgraded to new audio tech and the music replaced entirely in 2020. 

The organ and backing track were originally zoned to sound good in the space, but played together at home this would sound like one big mono track. So for easy listening I've carefully mixed the two tracks with a false stereo effect.

Produced by Graham Smart for Chessington World of Adventures in 1990

The Vampire, Chessington – 1990 Full Soundtrack Mix

uploading the no chorus version here

base by oguz / sr

Muppet Ronin [Kabuto the Python and Beaker Sullivan] - Fizzgig Piss

NerdcoreVPC