Heylog

The Upload

/G/U/I/L/T/Y/

prod xona <3

@heylog

-lyrics-
oh I might try
to end myself and neglect my health and I don’t need one more-
reason to live, I don’t need a friend
I could care less :/
for her help and I don’t need no pills to keep me held
but I’ve tried 2much,  2much right now..
but I can lie and that’s alright (:
but all my friends
push me on edge
and they do not sense
on why I feel dead..
oh I might try
to end myself and neglect my health and I don’t need one more-
reason to live!
I don’t need a friend
I could care less :/
for her help and I don’t need no pills to keep me held

oh i might cry :,(
when this blade touches my skin
i don't need remorse
for all the sins that i commit
i don't need a friend
to tell me what i'm doing wrong
you think i don't know this
i could tell you the exact same thing
you better watch your back
i see the folks you call your friends will try hurt you
don't be surprised when it happens
cause i was surprised when it happened 
hating on myself
makes the 2 of us
no i don't need help
or any pill
the story of my life
i gotta chill
feel like pennywise
giving me a thrill

spotify

care w/ heylog♡

produced by heylog

lyrics:
stop
(what)
where did we go wrong
like.. it hasn't even been long
i always search for u
but hell, i don't have a clue
i might've made you a song
but
does that even have a cost?
no
well baby it's all that i've got
hoping that we could just stop
listen here u need to know
come closer this is unknown
our love is what i'd die for
i don't bluff so let's explore
(ok)
i love you and no one else
i left u so i'll take the guilt
please don't move and just sit still
please don't go it's me i'll kill

i trusted you, i guess rn ur dead to me
i look at you and every time i grit my teeth
she said we're friends but na ur not friends w me
and i swear u would never get along w me
look
u were the only friend i ever had
but i still have all these cuts along my back
thought i'd never forgive you
never thought you'd be an issue
and i put every bit of my trust in her
now i have a hard time trusting anyone
forget you, i wanna be alone
i hate you, thought you were my bro

i love you

prod by me and soundcloud.com/cay2o

shoutout to soundcloud.com/heylog , soundcloud.com/nothomex , and soundcloud.com/lilskeleskrrt for hoppin on this with me they're all goated and rly cool ppl show love to them if u arent already

hope u all enjoy :)

lyrics:

me:
i dont think I can keep on livin like shit
close my eyes, feel the tension 
im stressin bout it 
cause no ones the same, and I cant feel nothin 
im feelin strange, but I cant care cus its nothin 

please dont leave yet, I can see you frown when im bleedin.
please ima be there, anytime u need me ill be close so u can see me 

heylog:
everyday i'm feelin awful
6 feet, horizontal
i recommend u give me space
cause i'm close to hostile
she compliment me on my eyes
said, "i love the way they sparkle"
i'm lookin like some trash
while she's looking like a model
i want you
ur irish changes from green to blue
i love you
but why u gotta leave so soon

not home. :
they told me im too gone 
green packed in a new bong
I told her put her bra on, I wont be here too long 
left your thraxx in a baggy
bad bitch ripped jeans, cincinnati 
im your boy so call me shaggy
at the house now her lips speakin nasty

skele:
go ahead and just leave now
won't be here when i break down
keep cutting me i wont feel it
but i love when you bring the knife out
n babe i think that u ruin me 
not numb but god how i wanna be
look in my eyes if you want i feel the blood in the back of my tongue
say love, 
i really think you're a bad one
i think you like how my hearts gone
i think you just wanna have fun 
play around till it kills me 
till i hang from my ceiling 
getting close to no feeling
will u stay here if im willing

ima be there

ima be there w/heylog, residential, & skele

produced by heylog

lyrics:
(keep thinking that i'm stuck 
falling from the sun
you found me in the mud
can you tell i've had enough)

getting muddy
hurts when your words crush me
can we please lie here
maybe i'm just tired
i'm strong when i'm alone
right now i feel so weak
breaking all my bones
i know ur judging me
i left it and our home
i feel u getting closer, hoping i can fix
your only little problem, praying that you'll quit
i'm sorry i'm such a bother, i probably ruined this
i don't know if i should call her, just saying that i miss you
but i'm confident that i got her, talking with her lips
took a chunk out of my shoulder, rashes on my neck
my mouth is filled with water as she take another sip
i don't know if i should stop her, trying to convince
that ur not even fair, do you think this is a game?
scrunching up my hair, do nothing how am i drained?
why do u even go? when this party's filled with hoes
MY STOMACH DROP, NERVOUS NELLY
TWISTS AND TURNS IN MY TUMMY
oh down another bottle it's her 3rd now
getting wasted quick
i don't see a point in this
turn towards a drink
baby let me tell you it ain't gonna fix a thing

i don't know if i can do this
continue making music
i've grown to be something
and i don't wanna lose it
i'm feeling all this pressure
they want me to start over
but that ain't gonna happen
i'll continue being a loser

getting muddy
hurts when your words crush me
can we please lie here
maybe i'm just tired
i'm strong when i'm alone
right now i feel so weak
breaking all my bones
i know ur judging me
left it and our

breaking out of my shell, tell me how do u do this
these stories that you tell, aint no coincidence
forgot how love is felt, you reminding me of it
don't need u to compel anything ur not comfortable with

(i'm not done yet)

my iris glistens, she told me "im amazed, 
i've never seen such blue eyes on a face"
hard to listen what did you even say
going fast it's too late to hit the breaks
getting stabbed busy drowning in a lake
on dnd i promise i'm not okay
associate with no one just only me
talk to people trying not decay

coincidence

Spotify: lnkfi.re/heylogaloneagain
AMV: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFIYFgu2tWY

Artist:
@heylog

Lyrics:
no luck, i'm bored about everyday
you suck and i would say it to your face
know why i'm here but i don't have to stay
it's because i love you so i won't walk away
but that's something i'd say in the past
moving on to new friends, discover new laughs
i've held this loneliness for too long
seeing friends but why do i still feel alone
alone again
i love my life
i burn my hand
i love my life
she asked me,
"how do you do?"
well i hate myself
but what's new?

alone again
i've lost my mind
i heal my skin
oh i'm alright
she asked me,
"so what's new"
well like nothing
and what about you

no luck, i'm bored about everyday
i suck, i do nothing to make a change
building up my anger i got so much hate
if i were you i'd leave, why don't you walk away
but you got something to say? cause you keep staring at me
and i would talk to you but i'm too busy sweating
and the social awkwardness is getting to me
oh i went too long without socializing

so just run away cause i look like a monster
im sorry, that i hurt your daughter
i know your family hates me but your dad yeah he was pretty cool
maybe you should learn from him take off that worthless costume
alone again
i love my life
i burn my hand
i love my life
she asked me,
"how do you do?"
well i hate myself
but what's new?

alone again
i messed up bad
i cut my skin
and grow it back

heylog - alone again

*free download*

Futility (free download)

MERCH: http://lilxlotus.storenvy.com/products/18507607-lil-lotus-noose-longsleeve

random old old song i wrote a long ass time ago with my friend daniel

Six Feet Sleep

I like a story I can see right through - and I know you do that cause I do that too
The feelings best when its fleeting - the memory is best when it's leaving
What was it like when you lived back then?
I wanna hear about some people that you never met
I wanna stare up at the sun until i'm blind again, wake up in your arms again.
I can't get ahold, thats why you see me, I'm so shook up
God might forgive you but I don't, this is something you know.

Black ice, Got a suicide fever, think about the past i put weight on the trigger
When you get this old you really start to figure.
Black Ice, Got a suicide fever, cast stones in the past i put weight on the trigger
When you get this old you really start to figure.
I feel so small, what could I be doing wrong?

never met

Gallows

nothings gunna change [prod color hue]

@heylog

lyrics: 
i been doin better
since i removed her number
baby im alone
dont know which one i wanted
i visit ur home
only to get high though
the drive dont feel the same
when it never thunders home
i can hear the train
it remind me that i made it safe
oh how we were close
its a shame we let it go to waste
fighting off n on girl
we werent made for eachother
i wont lose these memories
but oh man i really wanna
oh its a shame
we let it go to waste
baby heal my face
im losing everyday
oh man im done
god ive had enough
i swore it on my mom
i said i wish i was gone

i been doin better
since i went and left her
i still have ur things
including ur sweater
i can give it back?
dont wanna leave a thing behind
cause u just wished me death
i hate u disrespecting mine

i been doing better
since i ever met her
why u wanna talk and shit
dont u see its over?
i cant stand to be friends
id rather call us enemies
ur eyes oh my god
theyre the fucking death of me
i hate that ur happy
i wish u were hanging
from the fucking ceiling
cause you
fucked me up
and i cant get over it
i need some revenge

i wish i never loved her
i shoulda just left her
i was doing fine
until i fucking met her
i shouldve just disposed of u
but i didnt wanna hurt u
this is how i feel
i hope youll understand me soon

better (ft. heylog)

FOLLOW ME TO HEAR MY LATEST MUSIC

Lyrics:

nevermadeithome

I use to send iMessages 
to your phone 
are you at home?
baby yeah you missed my calls

I use to send iMessages
to your phone 
all day and night
I guess its alright 

that you just wont reply x2 
A tear sheds from my glassy eyes

I'm walking home 
Didn’t make it but I won’t fake it 
Broken screen on my phone 
Lost my mind but I’ll face it 

I'm caught up in my thoughts again always thinking the worse 
I must admit I must admit 
It is kinda hard

I must admit its kinda hard 
This pain in my chest getting dark 
I'm the sad boy sitting on the park 
With my mind just thinking question mark

cherryrizla

You used to text my number now you leave me alone
now I wonder who you call now when your going home
I hate myself for reading through our old messages
fuck
I guess your in my head again

backspace on your dm I cant send it
I wanna delete your contact but i prevent
myself
from seeking closure
I don’t wanna know that its over

Socials; 

pekarot;
https://www.instagram.com/prod.pekarot/
https://traktrain.com/pekarot?t=746383

cherryrizla:
https://soundcloud.com/chxrryrxzla
https://www.instagram.com/cherryrizla/

Loveless:
https://soundcloud.com/lovelessgroup

iMessages w/cherryrizla (prod. pekarot & nevermadeithome)

Buy on iTunes

messages w/ cherryrizla (pekarot & never)

https://open.spotify.com/track/2i9bDrY9IhCbvcDgyb8neq

produced by @splashgvng
featuring @datastarr

lyrics:

[@lottaheart]
i got issues
don't want to admit that i miss you
every time you leave it's like a pistol's,
pressed against my head until i'm with you

you got issues
i know that you're broken, i can fix you
you don't think it's true, try to convince you
every time you cry be there to kiss you
i'll be your tissue

[@datastarr]
i don't care
i was hurting, i was burning
you were there
light a match
watch me bleed out
fill your head with empty threats
and words that never left my mouth
know i never ask for help
but that's why i might break
fuck sake
see it clear, carrot cake
one shot, one take
bet it all at high stakes
chasing dollars, chasing thrills
why smoke? know it kills
wanna castle on a hill

[@lottaheart]
i got issues
don't want to admit that i miss you
every time you leave it's like a pistol's,
pressed against my head until i'm with you

you got issues
i know that you're broken, i can fix you
you don't think it's true, try to convince you
every time you cry be there to kiss you
i'll be your tissue

issues w/ data star [splashgvng]

spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/4P16CiLZeVyItt6IZ7GIF8?si=DmISfKRiSEe_IeZj8py6Cw

vocals/mixing by harvest, @softhert and @hammy
production by harvest
art by harvest and hamilton

instagram: www.instagram.com/harvestdusker

lyrics:
(harvest)
did i really have to fall this far?
seeing halos
break myself out of this heart
stay low

tired of mistakes i've made
tired of this grave
growing old of everyday feeling like it's the same
blue days
white hours
did i, did i ever pick the flower?
i'm an ice dancer watch me slip around as i start to fold 
searching for answers watch me spin faster till i start to know

(hamilton)
searching for the answers that i'll never find
but nothing really matters at the end of time
so imma run it up till i'm dead and gone
i could give a fuck about living long
i could give about anything
pour another cup now i'm withering
feeling like a ghost floating through the floor
don't know why i'm here what i'm living for 

feeling like a ghost floating through the floor
don't know why i'm here what i'm living for x2

(softheart) 
lately i've been living on high stakes
she a ballerina spinning on ice skates
got, got a feeling i'm not safe
i'm a victim of the wrong time right place
lately i been trying not to lose patience
it's a struggle everyday i do the same shit
then i feel a little better when i make shit
it gets better when i switch the location
(not sure about this part lol)

no swear to god i can't stand it
i'm manic
i'm frantic 
i can't think 
i panic
i just sink 
titanic

frozen in place, i wish i could keep you frozen in place
not saying there's no guarantee
i'll go to the coast till i'm safe (?)
it's the safe thing everyday
mind spinning like it's on ice skates
going southbound to a dry state

(harvest) [chopped]
did i really have to fall this far?
seeing halos
break myself out of this heart
stay low

(hamilton)
feeling like a ghost floating through the floor
don't know why i'm here what i'm living for x2

better (ft. heylog)

nevrfall