this time it won't fix

https://soundcloud.com/heylog
https://soundcloud.com/imcaves
https://soundcloud.com/irby314

you made me feel nauseous 
i keep getting sick
can't remember where it started 
can't forget all that you did to me
you tasted so bittersweet 
i still see you every time i sleep
i gave you every part of me 
i bet you couldn't tell
i fall in love with narcissists,
don't care about myself
i just go through sedatives
keep fucking up my health 
what's the point of heaven,
i already live in hell

it's not easier 
i'll lie and say it is 
i gave up on getting better 
it's just the way it is
i've been feeling numb ever since i was a kid 
i don't wanna die,
but i don't wanna try and live

i said that i loved you 
(save me)
i gave you the blood from my skin
i tried everything
admit it
it's hard but i did it
you left me too damaged 
this time it won't fix

[heylog]
i'm calling for you 
are you with someone else
the pics on my phone
are nowhere to be found 
would it surprise you 
if i took myself
i might just die here
when no ones around
but i made a choice 
that i regret 
stomp out the house
from what i said
and now it's too late to apologize
fumbled my words,
i guess this is goodbye 

i wish i did better 
thinking all the time 
baby it's whatever
see you in the next life
i'm trying to forget her 
but god it feels impossible
now she's just a number 
floating in my phone
i wish i did better 
thinking all the time 
i don't make any sense
and it makes me wanna cry 
but i look like im stupid
and she say that it's fine 
girl you're pretty funny 
tell another lie

it's not getting easier (w/ heylog) (prod. caves & irby)

3/4
@heylog
produced by me and @creativeravine

(vil)
you got me staring at the wall now
put a gun up to my head, that's all you got now?
i don't want to be the reason to set you free (i can't be who you want me to be)
you see me lying on the surface
its hard to tell who there is hurting
i know you're late and you want me to stop...
you gotta think on your own now

[chorus]
in a silo, fiending when i walk out
they go around me they don't know the shit we on about
corner breaching and i'm bringing all my dogs out
never fallout, waiting for a callout
callout, callout, callout, oh (x4)

(heylog)
you fooled a lot when you speak
it's a part of you
i know everytime you talk
it's never the truth
always stuck inside ur gut just to consume
took me years and i still barely know you
so 
how do you feel
living life faker than real
its a lot to spill
you'd do anything for will
if i could call you out
id do it by now
if i could watch you cry
i'd sip my tea and smile
please dont go
life sucks
i know

[chorus]
in a silo, fiending when i walk out
they go around me they don't know the shit we on about
corner breaching and i'm bringing all my dogs out
never fallout, waiting for a callout
callout, callout, callout, oh (x4)

spotify

callout ft. heylog [vil synth + ravine]

produced by sleepwater melonmusik & leftquiet

lyrics:
i dont wanna listen to this
i would rather you didnt exist
ill pray after you
ill die before you
its my time to live
but ill end up WASTING IT
its my life you ditched
ill disappear into THIN AIR 
oh where she gone have you seen her 
is she on the way home, swear ive been there 
id kill myself just to HOLD YOU ONE LAST TIME

im scared no where to go
seven times ive checked my phone
if you cared i wouldent be alone
addicted to the cracks on my phone

(gasp)

IF I LIE TO U ITS CAUSE I HATE MYSELF
ILL SAY GOODBYE SOON GUESS IM HEADING OUT
I WOULD KILL MYSELF JUST TO HOLD YOU ONE LAST TIME
WAS I RIGHT FOR YOU CAUSE I COULDENT TELL
MY ROOM A ZOO TYCOON IT NEEDS SOME CLEANING OUT
I WOULD FIX MYSELF FOR YOU TO BE MINE

stay between mortar
it all
flashes in my eyes
im now ready this time

#colne #sleepwater

colne

Produced by heylog

Lyrics:
checking on my phone i keep waiting for your name
got me pissed off cause i let loose of my brain
i don't think you understand i don't think you can
don't needa call you "baby," think i should call you "pain"

honestly, just get out of here
leave already
cause i'm stuck in here
i'll never be
driving home
anymore
i want you gone
haven't seen you in a minute
you say you're busy
but you're with your friend
i don't understand
thought you hated her
that's what you said

i keep checking on my phone waiting for your name
if i was important you won't forget about me
i don't think you love me yeah
i don't think you can
i'm a lot to handle baby
just let go of me

checking on my phone i keep waiting for your name
got me pissed off cause i let loose of my brain
i don't think you understand i don't think you can
don't needa call you "baby," think i should call you "pain"

typing in my phone don't if i'll call you baby
she respond saying that i'm cute and sweet like honey
got a girl looking like you crush on your favourite anime
she pitching up her voice when she spoke to me

checking on my phone i keep waiting for your name
got me pissed off cause i let loose of my brain
i don't think you understand i don't think you can
don't needa call you "baby," think i should call you "pain"

i'm closing my eyes when i scream into the mic
you got me so mad i propose to start a fight
i'm yelling in my pillow
now the whole thing's drenched from the water in my eyes

heylog - busy

prod @nate2timezz <3

hope you enjoy
thank you for listening, like seriously, so much
gotta keep moving, somehow

irregulation; my heart, it still beats though
necromancy like i'm beyond the grave
sleeping a 14, or i'm up for days
but either way, i'll still feel the same
i'd rather feel burnout over withdrawals
repression, it kills me a lot, i can't sing it off
and it never stops
never stops
and it never stops
it never stops

how'd another worm get caught in the rain?
sun come out to enhance that pain
shame, shame
all that you wanted was someone to save
now that you're lost, you treat them as god
paying your dues, they've been clogging like clots
don't care about being 'part of your mirage
fuck an applause, this all i got

that weight upon the water's nothing more than just a storm
so what we drinking for? 
what we drinking for?
those ideals are everything you've only felt with utter scorn
so i can't take no more
i can't take none

fluid ghosts, i can feel them haunt my bones
i cannot break through the drapes though
radiation burn my halo
don't you go ask how my day goes
you're not concerned anyway
you're plastic as legos

quiet down while break the seal
'cause i'm numbin' down from what they claim is real
every day i wake just to fuckin break, then rejuvenate
i'm in shock, kinda like an eel

hit em with a swift so fast like an aipom
they went from a real to fake in a day; gone.
rollout like an autobot, waiting for december sun
who am i depending? 
honestly, not anyone anymore

so, you like to target? 
trust me there's no need to implore
inside my cartilage, there's already arrows galore
you're my narcotic, the thought of you imposes me warmth
or so i thought it; ultimately leaving me sore


irregulation; my heart, it still beats though
necromancy like i'm beyond the grave
sleeping a 14, or i'm up for days
but either way, i'll still feel the same
i'd rather feel burnout over withdrawals
repression, it kills me a lot, i can't sing it off
and it never stops
never stops
and it never stops
it never stops

so i can try to fill in all the blanks
when shrouded in mirage, i'll take the blame
poison in the pot,
love it 'till you hate the fact that you forgot
what mattered anyways

aipom (nate2timez)

sewerperson - another day

[Intro: Sewerperson]
(branwen)
I can fling it
I feel it, I guess it's our turn
Oh, all this armour

[Chorus: Sewerperson]
Another day of talking just to say nothing
I message pretty much two people at the most
I'm scared of saying something wrong
I wake up and apologize for the millionth time this month
I'm tryna get fucked up so I'ma hit it from the bong
Substance been my best friend since she did me wrong
But we don't get along, this should kill me, I'm not strong
I won't put it in the setlist 'cause I would start to sob
This love you feel is fake, they just tryna get on

[Verse 1: Sewerperson]
I'm about to give up, they don't even know
I've thrown up every meal, I'm just tryna take it slow
Of course I knew that I would have these dark days
But dear God, just give me some of the light, please
I forget what had hurt me in defense
I regret every minute we have been friends 
Deep in thought, I reflect
But I'm brought back to reason by these scars on my neck
I'm not tryna pretend, I'm just geeking
Even if I was dead, you would knock the bleeding
And I know I made my bed and I'm sleepy
This bitch tryna kill me, made me happy

[Verse 2: guardin]
Been ignorin' all the signs, I'm not doin' fine
Lost another friend and I was sure that we'd survive
In the midst of all this shit, I put my life in an archive
Next to everything I loved and hoped eventually would thrive
But the truth is hard to swallow after everything has died
In the process, hard to grieve in tears, I wanna compromise
So you better try to settle for your comfort in the words exchanged from you to I
Move across the Eastern Coast and commit social suicide

[Chorus: Sewerperson]
Another day of talking just to say nothing
I message pretty much two people at the most
I'm scared of saying something wrong
I wake up and apologize for the millionth time this month
I'm tryna get fucked up so I'ma hit it from the bong
Substance been my best friend since she did me wrong
But we don't get along, this should kill me, I'm not strong
I won't put it in the setlist 'cause I would start to sob
Just let me feel this fate, baby, they just tryna get it all

sewerperson - another day (ft. guardin)

i hope you're proud of yourself 

prod/master: @skinnyatlas

i don't think there's something wrong 
i love it when you bite my tongue
pull my skin apart, dismember 
put the pieces back together

gone, i can't bring you along
sing the words to a song 
that i wrote you in fall 
(baby now you're)
gone, you don't even call 
baby is that so hard 
do you care at all 
(baby, grab my)
grab my neck any harder you'd break me 
i love that sex where you say that you hate me
if i won't scream then you don't hear it 
if i don't bleed then i won't feel it

hide myself in isolation
don't come close love
i can't take it 
bind myself, there's no escaping
hold me down i just,
hope you're

proud of yourself 
told you once, but i'll see you in hell
all his sins 
think you've ruined yourself
all the things that you do to yourself 
cards that you've dealt
cut me down into submission 
carve me up 'till god can't fix it
not even saline could wash out the stitches 
i'm not worth saving, there's no need for wishes

hide

hide (w/ skinny atlas)

i love him more than i love myself 

prod: michael harrison
master: @onlyfriendyeah

do i deserve to be this broken?
i must've done something wrong 
and when i speak i feel like choking 
it must've been all my fault
i love him more 
than i love myself 
i'll endure what he gives me 
nothing can change my mind,
nothing i won't sacrifice 

you've got such a violent taste now 
is that what it takes to turn you on?
he want me to pour my veins out 
is that what it takes to be your crush?
i'll keep a compliant face now 
you know i would hate to make you stop 
i'll be so silent, stay down 
if that's what it takes to be what you want 
(be what you want)

violent taste

lyrics:

every day fuse into one this month
i cant keep control if the speed to much
triple up my fluid on my last good night
i cant even see my fingers front my face in these lights
every things different than it had been before
unroll my backwoods and break my meteors
friends like these family i never knew before
life on this planet aint felt this new before

but we'll get by
she gets high
every other night
and just cries
girl ill be with u tonight
im on en route
im around the block
im near the drop off
really got me locked down
im ten down
i cannot not stand 
for this shame im too proud
locked up
so i kick the door down
locked down
she really got me locked down
guess she know me too well

im bleeding
im falling
im breaking apart
past the andromeda im in the stars
once you look down on the earth from this far
you can see just how small of a person you are

you could stay girl its cold can you see the lightning
i just talk then i leave im not tryna slide in
i distract then i bleed if she got me biting
dont get me wrong we all human but im uninviting
in the club but im tryna write inside that top my night stand
i fit too much of my work into this fucking life damn
i put too much of my pride into my fucking spine man
if i had to live a pawn just take my fucking life then

every day fuse into one this month
i cant keep control if the speed to much
triple up my fluid on my last good night
i cant even see my fingers front my face in these lights

but we'll get by
she gets high
every other night
and just cries
girl ill be with u tonight
im on en route
im around the block
im near the drop off
really got me locked down
im ten down
i cannot not stand 
for this shame im too proud
locked up
so i kick the door down
locked down
she really got me locked down

locked_down (nevrfall)

@heylog

lyrics: 
i been doin better
since i removed her number
baby im alone
dont know which one i wanted
i visit ur home
only to get high though
the drive dont feel the same
when it never thunders home
i can hear the train
it remind me that i made it safe
oh how we were close
its a shame we let it go to waste
fighting off n on girl
we werent made for eachother
i wont lose these memories
but oh man i really wanna
oh its a shame
we let it go to waste
baby heal my face
im losing everyday
oh man im done
god ive had enough
i swore it on my mom
i said i wish i was gone

i been doin better
since i went and left her
i still have ur things
including ur sweater
i can give it back?
dont wanna leave a thing behind
cause u just wished me death
i hate u disrespecting mine

i been doing better
since i ever met her
why u wanna talk and shit
dont u see its over?
i cant stand to be friends
id rather call us enemies
ur eyes oh my god
theyre the fucking death of me
i hate that ur happy
i wish u were hanging
from the fucking ceiling
cause you
fucked me up
and i cant get over it
i need some revenge

i wish i never loved her
i shoulda just left her
i was doing fine
until i fucking met her
i shouldve just disposed of u
but i didnt wanna hurt u
this is how i feel
i hope youll understand me soon

better (ft. heylog)

featuring @sewerperson
produced by heylog

lyrics:
(heylog)
everythings a joke all i hear is people lie
evil is right down the street, so i lock the doors inside
smoking they got black lungs but mine are getting ripe
just a buncha teens getting buzzed up while theyre high
i was just cold but now im getting hot
sweating down my back and i keep playing with my palms
im feeding off the air and i nibble at some crumbs
havent eaten all day i know thatd upset my mom

i was just freezing but now im sweating bad
could u spare ur body heat im running out real fast
i tried to phone death, but they would never answer
u know girl its bad, when ur boyfriend hid the cuts from her
i dont know how ur doin this
logan ur insane
crows talk
but i ignore the fact my old girl has changed
skinny kid eatin chicken
and nothing but eggs
now im finna burn it all off on the treadmill and shame

(sewerperson)
born in the snow
cant be hurt my soul has changed
it isnt fair
i got a body but i share the brain
i want the truth
could u give it to me
dont sugar coat it
i got the pockets on me stinky cause they filled with potent
uh, she just wanted my ok but that shit is horrible
walking inside this hostel what im doing dishonorable
i change out my human into something deplorable
i cannot breathe this air they gotchu huffing so casual
ah, take me in
i cannot do this by myself
i could be back tomorrow i just need a little help
im in a trance
off these pills
i might piss myself
im too skinny for these pants im slippin out my belt
eyes
i could feel her eyes on me
i gotta heart but i move like im a zombie
go
you should go now u dont want me
im a burden
without me u could be happy

(heylog)
everythings a joke all i hear is people lie
evil lives right down the street, so i lock the doors inside
smoking they got black lungs but mine are getting ripe
just a buncha teens getting buzzed up while theyre high
i was just cold but now im getting hot
sweating down my back and i keep playing with my palms
im feeding off the air and i nibble at some crumbs
havent eaten all day i know thatd upset my mom

playing with my hands and i keep tryna pop my knuckles
i did every finger i dont know why i keep tryna crack em
dont give me that look
i told her u should really stop that
eyes are bouncing back and forth and all i feel is anxious
i told u i get anxious when im in conversations
but i just nod and laugh im sorry i wasnt even listening
i can hear the chirp as the room is getting silent
now im getting awkward i think u should really try it