quiet nights, no end in sight
memories playing in my mind
i’m lost inside, no wrong or right
just shadows that you left behind

i see you walk in
to the garden to me
you start to argue
why you tryna make me leave
I light a cigarette
just to try and help me breathe
you say i’m distant
but you never really see

all this silence
is the loudest part of me
until im quiet
so i hear this moment bleed
you cross your arms
like you're guarding what's left of me
like you're guarding what's left of me

you keep holdin’ on
to the man i used to be
like i’m trapped in your memory
but i’m changin’, can’t you see?
you cross your arms
like you’re guarding what’s left of me
but i’m tryin’ to break free
from the ghost you wanna keep

i see you walk in
to the garden to me
you start to argue
why you tryna make me leave
I light a cigarette
just to try and help me breathe
you say i’m distant
but you never really see

all this silence
is the loudest part of me
until im quiet
so i hear this moment bleed
you cross your arms
like you're guarding what's left of me
like you're guarding what's left of me

walked into the garden
everything’s dead now
isn’t it crazy what a call does
i just keep my head down 
just gotta keep crawling, all in 
hit rock bottom
and my friends dont answer
so why would i call em?

walked into the garden 
everything’s on fire
you told me that you “loved me”
what a fucking liar 
my arms are fully burnt out
from treading all this water
i guess i never learnt
how to fix this flat tire 

it says you got a new man now
my friends saw you both in town 
could’ve at least waited 
till i finally got the 
courage to end it
but im cold product
so i jumped in and drowned
these waves wont let me down 
and in a few years when 
you find me on facebook 
and see i fucking did it
i’d love to see your face love

garden w/ sendflowrs (jolst, irby)

in order <3 prod nevrfall
@breckenford
@user-642636378
@kiddamo
@notaheroo
@notcursed
@alex-thomas-fox

hurt (w/ brecken, halfhearted, kiddamo, notahero, notcursed, vails) (nevrfall)

prod. by @rod

@rod
yeah i blame it on the drugs but it must be something else
writing lyrics bout my life with a gun on top my shelf
i dont got no one talk to man i really need some help
i just dont wanna put my feelings all on top of someone else

everytime we talk you make me feel like shit
i just wanna fucking die let me slit my wrist
need to clear my mind need to reload quick
got the high beams on 110 in the whip
blocked your number because 
everytime we talk you make me feel like shit
i really hate to wake up and just feel like this
i dont really miss you but i still reminisce
when i would hit your phone and every shot was a miss

@wraithwilldie
I guess I’ll sit up in my car
Puffing loud in rerolled cigars
When you look back, is it ever fondly?
I get cold and nights just get long
I get sick of making these songs
When nothing hits the way that I want
Nothing feels the way that it was
I don’t think I’m fit for the part

@rod
everytime we talk you make me feel like shit
i just wanna fucking die let me slit my wrist
need to clear my mind need to reload quick
got the high beams on 110 in the whip
blocked your number because 
everytime we talk you make me feel like shit
i really hate to wake up and just feel like this
i dont really miss you but i still reminisce
when i would hit your phone and every shot was a miss

@wraithwilldie
You know
Everything about me
And you pick me
All apart
I’ll go
Everywhere that you go
Until you burn it
All to tar

@rod + @wraithwilldie
everytime we talk you make me feel like shit
i just wanna fucking die let me slit my wrist
need to clear my mind need to reload quick
got the high beams on 110 in the whip
blocked your number because 
everytime we talk you make me feel like shit
i really hate to wake up and just feel like this
i dont really miss you but i still reminisce
when i would hit your phone and every shot was a miss
(2x)

@wraithwilldie
I said to stay away because I can’t give what u take
I’m compressing and my head thinks maybe we just need a break
Okay?
I gave it all away
I tend to face the flames
I never bend, I break
So say it’s all okay
I guess you found the fucking cracks up in this armor
I harbor all the hatred you have given for a whole year straight
Yet you negotiate
The price upon my fate
I’d trade it all for heaven
But you will never take

clearing my head (web)

Shout out dash for making 10/10 beats 

Lyrics - 

No face
no case
 I be slidin through the night
All black blade tucked  ain’t lookin for a fight
30 on my clip turn his whip to a shrine
I don’t talk much I just creep when it’s time

Drip like the gutter ice look muddy
Hit your block once now the whole scene bloody
Don’t know names I just move how I move
Lost in the smoke ain’t nothin to prove

Ghost in the cut I don’t do no loud
Keep my head down but I still draw crowds
Lames talk slick but they all want clout
Slide through slow make the whole hood doubt

Tags on my toes not clothes that’s death
Ridin with a piece I don’t need no vest
Chrome on the hip make em freeze no flex
Came from the mud I ain’t pressed bout checks

No face
no case
 I be slidin through the night
All black blade tucked  ain’t lookin for a fight
30 on my clip turn his whip to a shrine
I don’t talk much I just creep when it’s time

Drip like the gutter ice look muddy
Hit your block once now the whole scene bloody
Don’t know names I just move how I move
Lost in the smoke ain’t nothin to prove

rise n shrine p. dash

i'll scream
your name
so loud
it echos away

i can't breathe
oh ur not right here with me
oh such a shame
shame

i've got your blood
all on my hands
oh what a mess
that i have made
i froze im stuck
tell me what the next step is
cause i don't know
how to control
myself

i want this
im watching
like tell me
how do you want love?
im nauseuos
i lost it
right before us
cant help it
im obsessed
with the way you touch
i need you
i cant help 
but feel im not enough


its all okay
maybe that was a lie
you wont ever know
i wont see your face
i do this for nothing
i wake up 
just to find out
its all the same

i've got your blood
all on my hands
oh what a mess
that i have made
i froze im stuck
tell me what the next step is
cause i don't know
how to control
myself

oh what a mess that i have made [muzcean]

lyrics ⬇️


figurative language



im lonely as often as you’re in my head
thoughts been depleting my every last breath
and i know
last year was cold 
reminds of every time i never told you so

said that i couldnt love you like the other ones in my past
you also told me if you dropped me you would never want me back
did that for a month
now its been minute
used me as crutch
til you left cuz you were livid

cut ties with ur enemies cuz ur trippin i could not
then ill be with my homies til im dead and ima rot
maybe everything you said to me was way wrose than you thought 
way too heavy like an anvil please oh lord just wish me gone

wish me gone
ima leave the same second you push me off
you made dive me off that cliff and i hit the bottom i hit the rocks

wheres the applause
 i thought you wanted me out of the universe up me in the stars
somehow it always feel dark
wish i could tell you that i could restart
but i can’t 
every night you talk to me i feel like you want me to feel like i’m an ant
step over me like the part in the pavement 
i feel like you want me rant


i ran out on everything you tried to fix cuz i couldnt pick up ur hand
watch me go down the list as everything i want just wont go to plan
i roll in the rubble and sticks i know that they can’t understand 
if you gave me one more wish then i would wish that i was them

i cant play pretend
cant go through all this again i know ill get revenge
eventually ill explain to everyone what i did
what i did

you scraped away that memory on skin with 
broken glad
tempted to exempt myself from everything i had

dont remind me of that addiction 
everytime i was there in an instant

now atleast where im at im reminded I exist 
sorry that its killing me i wish that we could live

pushing me and honestly i hate when you persist
but i been here ever forever so i cant even resist
i wish that every night you went out when u been drinking outta line wit all ur friends

switch up the top i don’t wanna slip
im off the bottle i wish i had bliss
i was out fully far in the abyss
if we departed id turn to a man and realize that everything you did was

switch the topic (everest)

Prod. Michael Harrison 
Sorry I’m so experimental
Lyrics~

I’m so unspoken 
It’s all so hopeless 
This pen and pad the only way I’m copin 
Is it the tree that I drag  or the asthma that got me chokin 
No don’t come in please I’m ok  I’m just smokin 
But I haven’t seen you in weeks 
Talk back to my door as it speaks
Just checking in, can you breathe 
Answer me now and I’ll leave 

I been tryina write these tracks 
About what I feel but they trash 
Then do it again and again till I crash 
knew the caffeine wouldn’t last 
What a drag 
As I waste all the traits that I got from my mom and my dad 
I know this time it’s my bad 
I’m Haunted by all the ghosts from my past 

It’s crazy cause you’re like a poltergeist stuck in the shell of a man that you used to be 
Fuck you I hate you get out of that room shits getting old just give up on your dreams 
The puppeteers back at my door I can feel all his malice intent as he tries to tell what to think 
Like shit let me breath, quit pulling my strings

feed me to the noise

ty mistral for the guitar <3

original song <3 : https://soundcloud.com/guardinmusic/inside

Lyrics

I bet you like the way that I
Sit inside on a Friday night
Doing nothing with my life
While you're out partying with other guys
But I'm not wise and these aren't lies
According to you it's all in my mind
But I see the things that they post online
And it makes me sick to my fucking spine
I worry a lot about the day you leave
'Cause the day you leave is the day I leave
And I think too much about suicide
About killing time, about time I try
Something new
'Cause this shit gets old
But I love the way that she says "I love you"
And I tried many times to rewind to the days you were mine
And I tried many times to erase what we made, what have I done?
'Cause a part of me died when you left in November that night
I think he's right, beside you telling you what to say to me, why?
Do I think what I think 'cause I think I'm in love with a lie?
Do I think what I think 'cause I think I'm in love with a lie?
Do I think what I think 'cause I think I'm in love with a lie?

inside (guardin cover)

P. nomansland 

Support my friend enyu!

https://on.soundcloud.com/qUpx1yH6fYpXyzuuwE


Lyrics~

(Swamp) 

My lifes in a spiral 
And I just can’t seem to catch a break
When I tried this shit the passive way 
they hit me at a faster pace 
It was a massacre up there on that caligo hill
Sends A shiver down your serabelem, signal the chills 

Ok yeah I’m back up on attack, there’s just no foldin us 
Grab that ammo load it up 
It’s gettin kinda quiet on this California western front 
Give it all you can until you can’t and hope the war is almost done 
Shell shocked, you’ve had enough 

There you go, you’re telling yourself that never again 
Will you put you’re life on the edge for something that somebody said 
The battle goes on in your head 
And shurly you’ll face a certain death 
But I guess you love that shit because you never left 

(Enyu)

Loaded chambers caught in a deadlock
choke on me like a tight knot
rewinding all of my future plans
hailing down on me till my heart stop
yeah, but i’m still in it
guess i’m twisted
drawn to where i fucking bled
need some god to grant my wishes
rather than be fucking dead

i scrape my wounds when its dark
a shiver down my extremities
and while the whole world fell apart
i stand upfront with serenity
and when I turn around
the time has come for confession
to learn a beautiful lesson
i’m heading outbound
to fend off my imperfections

(Swamp)

Hopefully when the dust settles I’ll be alright 
All intact and alive 
The only loss being time 
Trying to figure out another way to save myself 
From the war in my head, it’s been a living hell

never ending spiral w/ enyu

gravel road 
driving home
every pothole in wisconsin
people grow
i dont know
if we have much in common, anymore

iv been one with the silence
only you can fill my void
promise that im trying
promise this was not my choice

cuz all that i know is defeat
white flags, running back to places iv seen
i know this damn movie by scene and Frame
and characters names
turn it off

its been hard to be honest
i hate whay iv done
left at the bottom
im one with the mud
was never the fondest 
of showing you love
but ill still deposit
your rent every month

half of these problems 
i did it just to make you mad
if im not an option
dont say you will take me back

phone screen just faded black
i couodnt call
board up my windows im sick of your cold
youre passive aggresivly gaining control
remember that halloween
i made you my home

babe its not you it was me
self inflicted wound where i bleed
you had all that i need
if these walls could feel tension theyd scream

a movie i’ve memorized [jacob vallen]

prolly a one off but been listening to ericdoa recently n wanted to try somethin similar
couple weeks off for a halloween based drop but better late than never

o and i got the pass from multiple bi/gay homies <3

Lyrics:

she tryna get chased far 
in a scream mask
i'm like take a second 
you don't mean that
she on her 41st dude
like a sea bass
lookin at me for next (tf?????)
"where the cream at"
he heard the shit i'm droppin and quickly started his suckin up
no go on tell me what you think i can take it u little pussy fuck
smash bros in the basement ur weird for maining jigglypuff
rather watch a movie in a blanket w a girl i love

spark it up
pass the blunt
i can never do enough
she tryna get her hand down my pants but imma pry it off
her guy is kinda upset
he's a little quick to punch
lay him out
calm him down
it's not me who's fucking up

yuh

it's not me who's fucking up
slow down
hoe bag 
this dick up for no grabs
find you unappealing you would think I was a whole ***
monogamous as fuck check my discog if you don't know that
draw a line yea i bet you'll fuckin toe that
repeat a bar like the shit you said was all that
he can't hit what i do like it's kovaak's
tistic like i'm chris chan 
where my girl at

she tryna get chased far 
in a scream mask
i'm like take a second 
you don't mean that
she on her 41st dude
like a sea bass
lookin at me for next (tf?????)
"where the cream at"
he heard the shit i'm droppin and quickly started his suckin up
no go on tell me what you think i can take it u little pussy fuck
smash bros in the basement ur weird for maining jigglypuff
rather watch a movie in a blanket w a girl i love

it's not me who's fucking up
slow down
hoe bag 
this dick up for no grabs
find you unappealing you would think I was a whole ***
monogamous as fuck check my discog if you don't know that

ghostface (prod. nightiger)

not.a.fx.hero on discord if u need a friend.
https://discord.gg/RU7YPvM3CC
song every 1-2 weeks
beat every week

@onebigwoopsy
@timeless-archive
@miserygxrden