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Shut My Eyes (Feat. Sydcxx) (Prod. Xinny)

pop these pills till its over
everybody hating on lil october
thats why im staying high
no im never staying sober
ill see you in the sky girl
im never growing older
im caught in the same pain
im always growing colder
dont even know my full name
you call yourself a doxxer
girl cut up my brain
call her a doctor
get a new bitch in the same day
and i dont even want her

if you tryna hurt me
youll prolly succeed
ive got hella ops
but its me vs me
if u want me to stop
hit the thc
on the grind to the top
with my bpd
if you tryna hurt me
youll prolly succeed
ive got hella ops
but its me vs me
used to wanna be a cop
endless misery
watch your body drop
coz its me vs me

these thoughts in my brain 
askin me why id stay 
my life is a nightmare 
it wont go away
i lie through my teeth
and say that im okay
pretend that its normal be feelin this way
its not okay 
its not alright
the battle inside is like every night
myself wants to kill me 
i put up a fight
im still wearing the mask 
when i pick up the pint
put that shit to my head
it cant be the end
i just wanted out
now im on the fence
i know its crazy
but in my defense
i prolly am too
im off of the meds 
like i said im borderline
whatd you expect
got a hole in my soul
but im gettin bread
my horizon is somewhere that 
ill never tread
holdin on to what ive got 
and the pain wont end

if you tryna hurt me
youll prolly succeed
ive got hella ops
but its me vs me
if u want me to stop
hit the thc
on the grind to the top
with my bpd
if you tryna hurt me
youll prolly succeed
ive got hella ops
but its me vs me
used to wanna be a cop
endless misery
watch your body drop
coz its me vs me

me vs me w/ HKFiftyOne (prod. Xenshel)

Lyrics:
i ain't been sober in like ten days
baby come on over, promise i'm ok
say they wanna be me but they don't, no way
i'm not myself when you're far away

i ain't been sober in like ten days
baby come on over, promise i'm ok
say they wanna be me but they don't, no way
no way, no way, no way

i just sleep, i just sleep, all the time now
staying low, make a peep, homicide now
i can't speak about what's on my mind now
except to these songs and my baby she mine now

i feel like im crazy, im based in my mind now
i'm pacing the corners like shadows in hideout
i'm up and i'm down, when i smile i frown
i'm a mime now, i'm a clown now, i'm a raven in the ground

i ain't been sober in like ten days
baby come on over, promise i'm ok
say they wanna be me but they don't, no way
i'm not myself when you're far away

i ain't been sober in like ten days
baby come on over, promise i'm ok
say they wanna be me but they don't, no way
no way, no way, no way

Darling

darling

lyrics : 

you’re right im smokin 
n starvin 
it makes the pain go away regardless 
cuz in my mind i’m a fuckin goddess 
you can’t bring me down i’m flawless 

everyone round me don’t say nothing 
they say blah blah blah 
stop the frontin 
i say whatever i want 
cuz it’s bullshit 
at the end of the day they ignorin

they ignorin 
ignorin 

it makes the pain go away 
i wish i died yesterday 
i don’t wanna see my face
it makes me sick 
makes me think bout you 


i choke it up i throw it up i pour it up  light the blunt smoke it up fuck it up eh 


& they don’t say nothin 
& they don’t say nothin

dead girl walking (prod.branwen)

Lyrics:
Let me introduce myself
I am a shell of what I was when I knew myself
And I thought I could escape from all the pain I felt
But the devil left me here, there was no room in hell

I wander down this path, don't know where am at
Everything is scary here, but now I'm scary back
Don't want you to see me fall apart my bones will snap
Under all the weight of knowing there's no going back

The movies lied, I thought I'd be numb
On the other side, but now I feel dumb
'Cause pardon me, if this comes off blunt
But my skin's falling off, I've been dead for a month

But,,

I still feel but I wish that I didn't
Heart gone black, haven't lived in a minute
I know it's how things go, decompose 'til I'm pitted
I'm just another hollow shell, but I know that you get it

I'm the walking dead, so I'll spill my guts
I'll just stay and rot, I don't give a fuck
I just wanted to die, but it's just my luck
When I wanted to leave, but I just got stuck

The minutes turn to hours, and then it's been days
Fester in my bed, while my heart decays
Take it out my chest and set that shit ablaze
It's alright I didn't use it anyway

I want to be left by the creekside
Six feet deep, three wide, and I'll be fine
When my body rests, will my soul fly?
Guess I'll never know, 'til I leave mine

The movies lied, I thought I'd be numb
On the other side, but now I feel dumb
'Cause pardon me, if this comes off blunt
But my skin's falling off, I've been dead for a month

But,,

I still feel but I wish that I didn't
Heart gone black, haven't lived in a minute
I know it's how things go, decompose 'til I'm pitted
I'm just another hollow shell, but I know that you get it


Corpse (I Still Feel But I Wish That I Didn't) (prod. dotbeats)

In 2017 I got addicted to painkillers
In the six weeks before we met
And after that I took them only when I needed
Like the night you called me back
And in the mornings we would walk to class and smoke cheap cigarettes
Because menthols taste healthier, right?
Back then I didn’t sleep and I wrote shitty poetry
About Newark when my grandma died

And i hope you don’t remember at all
You just grab the money and i’ll take the fall
I never moved to New York, but I went there on tour; I’ve got your notes in my drawer
I still remember it all

In 2021 I mixed klonopin and whiskey
In the city where angels go to die
And I made a man a flower crown then passed out on his living room floor
And said “don’t touch me, I’m fine”
See, my ambition was a prison, wanted to carve my name into
The bones of everybody I met
Back then I didn’t see beauty in just about anything
So I guess it turned out just how you said
It would

But I hope you don’t remember at all
Been running away, it’s getting harder to walk
I don’t know what it was for, getting ruined for sport; goddamn victorian whore
I still remember it all

Reading my old journals, double-checking it got better
And my hands still turn purple when it’s cold, so I’ll wait seven years
‘Til there’s nothing left of who i was but melody and fever
I hope next time, when she says she’s too high you’ll stop
And you'll believe her

One day I won’t remember at all
The pictures all faded, now we’re outlines in chalk
I never moved to New York, but I’ll go there on tour; I guess that settles the score
I still remember it all

i still remember it all

lyrics:

do you remember that one day out at the beach
we kept hopping bars and stared drunk at the sea
you jumped in my arms and now i guarantee
the sand just reminds me what we used to be

im getting ahead of myself run it back
the first time we met, had a panic attack
you're so beautiful and im getting off track
the moments we shared, know i cant get it back

can't get it back

it tears me apart, just promise you're safe
each night, it still breaks my heart
i don't even know you, how'd you get this way

i can't protect you, you're no longer mine
i just watch from a distance and wish i would die
but i know youre too busy to be in that vibe
while you swipe through your options and leave for the night

i know you said that you're back to your old self
you said youre heartless, i know youre not doing well either
but i pray like every night for your well being
hope you find the light, i know it's hard, when your hearts bleeding

i know its hard when your hearts bleeding
i know its hard 'cause my hearts bleeding
i know its hard when your hearts bleeding
i know its hard and my hearts bleeding

bleed, and bleed
bleed, and bleed
bleed, and bleed

i have to let you go
i have to let you go
i have to let you go
i have to let you go
i have to let you go
i have to let you go
i have to let you go
i have to let you go
i have to let you go
i have to let you go
i have to let you go
i have to let you go
i have to let you go

Knew You Were Leaving I'm Just Glad I Got To Share It All With You

KnewYouWereLeavingImJustGladIGotToShareItAllWithYou

sometimes i feel like a ghost in a crowd
its purgatory and i wont make it out
im not alive and i dont really know how
i got no voice youll never hear if i shout

i know im dead to you, but i got unfinished business that i gotta do like
tell you that i love you still,
even if i never made enough to pay the bills

im working hard in death
got so much on my plate i never catch my breath
i swear it helps to know that im already dead

sometimes i feel like im a ghost

like im dead, like my coffin is my bed
i want to finally rest, but your voice is in my head
ive haunted this whole town, but im still left feeling down
youre the only one i want
i cant have you, i cant touch you,
im a ghost

i know you wont look my way
its done this time i know itll stay
each day act my part in the play
i know youre gonna say, that i just need to pray

i need to find something that makes me feel magic
i guess thats weed and alcohol makes me manic
i try to be okay now but its too tragic

sometimes i feel like im a ghost

like im dead, like my coffin is my bed
i want to finally rest, but your voice is in my head
ive haunted this whole town, but im still left feeling down
youre the only one i want
i cant have you, i cant touch you,
im a 
ghost

Ghost (Unplugged)

ghost (unplugged version)

this is the story of a boy who knew too much
so the world was always gray, and he had no sense of touch
and he kept himself real safe inside the confines of his bed
but he was not alone, hearing all the words been said

all my friends are the demons in my head
and we always have a talk every time i go to bed
but i don't think they're my favorite, they just wanna rub it in
that you're probably gone forever, but i should not give a shit 'cause

that's life, but i really wish it ain't
'cause like everytime i panic, i can't breath and then i faint
but it's probably 'cause i never eat enough, now i'm drained
i just got no appetite since you split, i'm detained

this is the story of a girl who felt too much
she just wanted to be held, but she rarely felt a touch
and the distance always broke her, the connection turned to rust
so now she's somewhere out there, and there's no one that i trust

with her

this is the story of a boy who's now grown up
he spends his time alone, he minds his business, makes some bucks
he knows he has to stay here even when he feels it tug
there's nothing on the other side, it's all the same but just more fucked

The Story

the story

i think i hate everything that i ever loved
now that the fire snuffed
baby im packing up boxes of things that you gave me
and things that im running from

but "baby" ain't "baby" no more
cause im out on my own and im feeling numb
turn it up loud on my speakers
and lay on the floor 'til i feel the drums

i cannot drink, i cannot smoke
the blood from ym vomit keep burning my throat
im tryna get by but my heart beating slow
and if i ever left i know no one would know

sometimes i find myself grabbing my phone
every time that i be way too alone
but then i just drop it cause im at the bottom already
no point now in making it known

its all gonna be okay real soon
real soon

i feel abandoned, cause im a burden
maybe im fucked up, i know that for certain
got a life sentence now this is the verdict
death penalty, to the void im returning
im hoping to God that i dont end up burning
im doing my best but im just really hurting
i just need a break for a sec now im cursing
i scream at myself with these insults im hurling

im losing myself, im losing my brains
im losing the lifeforce that course through my veins
feel like my body is wrapped up in chains
tape on my mouth so they think im okay

dont even know who i am in this verse
i feel too much, now im blessed with a curse
its just like a nightmare but way fucking worse
and the only way out is the back of a hearse

sinking

i dont want you to see my face
i dont want to feel this pain
i just want to go away
want to leave, im forced to stay
honestly my soul is aching
theres no hell, you'd be mistaken
you dont see the bones im breaking
im so tired i cannot take it

stepping through the stones in the valley of death
did all i could do, i gave it all of my breath
breaking all the promises that i ever kept
falling to the floor, and then the heavens, they wept

Shut My Eyes (Feat. Sydcxx) (Prod. Xinny)

Jacky B

Recent comments

Kingdom13

Kingdom13

AMV brother

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