w/ @ripavah 
lyrics:
i learned to deal with my shit
i figured out youre a bitch
you fucked w most of my friends 
and is that something that your proud of?
i know that you hate me, say it loud and clear
nows when your here?
ion got no fears
fw you that was my last one
i think she straight from hell
she only care bout herself
ion know who you think you is
this hoe been acting ridiculous
u nothing but a damn hypocrite
and im into that
fucked up
feeling left out
fell in but i stepped out
you broke me down but im fine
fw you u was my last one

spotify

hypocrite w/ avah

https://li.sten.to/lotus
ig: ripavah

welcome to my life
lyrics:
Lotus, I've been getting better let me show ya
Smash an empty bottle to the dome
I've been feeling like I've grown up
Better than ever cause I'm about to blow up

I've been in my feelings lately but I hate that shit
My situation yeah its dire but I played that shit
I've been feeling like I'm crazy on a tightrope
Reminiscing things that I'll achieve my rivals cant though

I'll say fuck her, sell out shows so she knows she's wrong
Make a million off a sound so I made this song
Yeah I know my fans are coming yeah its been so long
Manifest about the future cause I stayed so strong

Lotus, you know it
I've been on a tangent for a year but I ain't ever fucking show it
I just know my fame is close but I think I've been on the wrong path
Happiness and Adderall, the two things we should all have

You ain't shit yeah you a bitch
I'ma make a jump right to the top then i'ma clinch
Shitty ass artists sign to labels then they're gifted
Imagine what would happen if my music got the same thing

Fuck the poppin sound, and fuck to who's around
I'ma make a wave of other artists with my sound
I wont fix my problems if I don't aim for the ceiling
blacked out drunk, that's a shitty fucking feeling

Fuck you to the past, I'm glad it didn't last
I'ma speed to number one or I'll just fucking crash
I'm glad I'm fucking back just for a while I've had a barrier
Sprouted like a lotus I'll just shout out to my haters

Lotus is strong, lotus is fire
Lotus is weak, lotus is crying
I've been drowning lately listen here's a happy ending
Feeling like a boss, and I'm looking like a real king

Red eyes, feel low
So high, so low
Might cry, oh no
Lotus, blossom

I ain't succeed in a minute
Love this life forever bitch you know I'm not quitting
Avah feels on fire bitch you know that I am winning
Take over my life I wasn't happy where I'm headed, oh shit

I've been in my feelings lately but I hate that shit
My situation yeah its dire but I played that shit
I've been feeling like I'm crazy on a tightrope
Reminiscing things that I'll achieve my rivals cant though

I'll say fuck her, sell out shows so she knows she's wrong
Make a million off a sound so I made this song
Yeah I know my fans are coming yeah its been so long
Manifest about the future cause I stayed so strong

avah

lotus

other platforms

lotus (dercept x ayoley)

https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/datboiryen/doing-2-much
lyrics

Only get this feeling when I’m touching you
Can’t tell if you give a fuck about it
Got so much love for you
I can’t tell if this the wrong time to bring this up but
I really miss the way your body feel
Your bestfriend told me I was the one that’s messing up
I know I like to play I guess I’m doing too much
Yeah I’ll be back soon
How the fuck do I make these songs
It’s all because of you
I’m taking these shots right to the face
So don’t get mad if I just pick up my phone tonight
And Ima do what it takes whatever makes me feel right
Wake up drunk, pissed as fuck
Like what the fuck is my life
Yeah I think it’s time
Like maybe if we touch a little, I’ll be fine

Like hold on, wait
I can’t tell if you’re serious bae
I’m on my way
Cuz you’ve been distant, not calling me lately
I’m feeling real sick to my stomach
Everyone walks when I’m running
I’m doing my best and it’s nothing
Somebody tell me why
This shit just keeps on happening to me
I wanna (fucking die)
Don’t fucking say that
I got that devil on my shoulder screaming
You better get payback
I’m about to get with all your friends
And do you dirty like you did to me
Wake me up when this shit ends
I don’t wanna pretend no more

This shit ain’t fun for a nigga like me
I almost slipped into the streets
All these bitches slimy
Ain’t nobody healing me
Nobody doing shit for free
I need to get these feelings off cuz you know that I

doing 2 much (p. typhoon)

prod slicky

@oldcollin

luv u niz

https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/oldcollin/instigate
https://open.spotify.com/track/75TBDR2qvO0UOR8TNCa3ej?si=c0801757b7d74861/

picture taken by @luckiwitch on instagram

instigate (p slicky)

prod
@1hallow
@suyuki
mixed by @janeremover
[lyrics]
im starting realize that its my fault
cause i dont know where i woke up 
or what we did last night
she tell her mama that im awful
heard he was talking, left his body
where it wont see the light
its 2am, i feel my nose sting 
fuck, i heard my phone ring
i promise ima call you back
too intoxicated, keep it lowkey
please dont say you know me
cause no one ever had my back

all to say, where i've been,
is a mouthful
i cant blame, what you said,
cause im awful
we're on and off like every second
say "i love you" and regret it
cant stay off the pharmaceutics 
all the shit, that you said, 
is a mouthful
say im dumb and misled
guess im awful
you tried your hardest to forget it 
you still call me when your stressing
blame it on the pharmaceutics

i know
that even when you're with him 
you feel alone
and i wish i could help you, but it's
too late now, the sun's gone down
and its cold, its so cold
and when the withdrawls kick, and you feel so sick
well just know
you're still home

all to say, where i've been,
is a mouthful
i cant blame, what you said,
cause im awful
we're on and off like every second
say "i love you" and regret it
cant stay off the pharmaceutics 
all the shit, that you said, 
is a mouthful
say im dumb and misled
guess im awful
you tried your hardest to forget it 
you still call me when your stressing
blame it on the pharmaceutics

awful (hallow + suyuki)

wrote a song about a weird world i created in my head lol.

lyrics

Just check in on your cell phone 
Youll be home by curfew 
We dont have that much time 
Should be getting dark soon 
You can raise a blind eye 
Tell em that its not you 
But they know 
Yeah they know 
Yeah they always know 

And the soldiers they march with their guns 
In a place that is harsh and its void of the sun 
Now your scared that you cant go outside 
So you run 
But theres nowhere to go
Yeah theres nowhere to go 

Just check in on your cell phone 
Youll be home by curfew 
We dont have that much time 
Should be getting dark soon 
You can raise a blind eye 
Tell em that its not you 
But they know 
Yeah they know 
Yeah they always know 

And im scared to say
That ive run out of options and theres no one to save me 
So wont you stay 
I just hope that you dont become one of the ones that blame me 

Yeah cuz right now im just confused wether i should turn the lights out
Or if i should keep on going its not nice out 
I dont like what i see
Wish that i could have a better world but that shit aint free

Yeah and now i wonder
What this world has come to
And every summer i just wanna know who you run to 

Whered you go 
I dont know 
Hope that they dont get you soon 
Had so many fucking dreams
Coulda took us to the moon
And now i know that your gone 
Fucking hate the month of june 
Thats the time that i lost you

Just check in on your cell phone 
Youll be home by curfew 
We dont have that much time 
Should be getting dark soon 
You can raise a blind eye 
Tell em that its not you 
But they know 
Yeah they know 
Yeah they always know

dystopia (johnnyfriend)

w/ @t1gerstar
cover art by @aithuia
prod: me & @aithuia

lyrics:
(polar)
you think im perfect, im not perfect
you think it hurts, but on the surface
its not bad

try and lie and say its worth it
close your doors do i deserve this
its not bad

you love to play
you love to play
and i can tell that
you hate the way
you hate the way
you recognize my
every mistake that i make
its amplified by every word that you say
and im feeling the weight

its not bad

(tigerstar)
tell me all the things you want and i'll try to be that
get rid of and scrap the shit that has no meaning
promise im alright
i'll be good for awhile
until i become someone who you would wanna
save a seat and space for and more cus u want me here
everybody wants that one person they know they can't have
but its really not bad
its just that i made it up in my head and you dont see it

even if the surface says a different thing
if i was really suffering i'd suck it up and say
it's not bad

Im trying not to freak out even though its the worst pain
I can hold your hand and bleed out and i would still say its not bad

surface w/ tigerstar

produced, mixed, and mastered by goodbyebrody

acoustics by the goat chrismarek

*lyrics*

(mochji)
never thought you’d go missing within these pages
my mind still running for miles, though it’s been ages
we haven’t talked in a while, lost in fixations

all i wanted was change
all you needed was space
these winter nights keep getting, colder now that you’re away
did i push you too far? was all of this a waste?
fine wine and cheap cigars, harder just to conversate

(brody)
we sit and talk for a second
treat words just like a weapon
i won't meet you in heaven
fucked up, im feeling threatened

all the, past time, white lies
i'm getting in my head

new love, time flies 
won't be the last of it

(tyler)
melted lungs from another fire
light another cigarette
cause we’re going down to the wire
if it’s conflict that you want
then it’s problems you’ll get
my house is burning down but i’ve never felt so content

i’m running out of options
toxic
she said that i lost it
take me off my life support
i don’t need fucking oxygen
i don’t wanna win
and in a minute i’ll be staring at my only friend
in the reflection of a mirror
warning signs been getting clearer
and the smoke seeps through the floor
i got 15 minute then u gotta go
cause this flowers still gonna bloom through the snow

(brody)
we sit and talk for a second
treat words just like a weapon
i won't meet you in heaven
fucked up, im feeling threatened

all the, past time, white lies
i'm getting in my head

new love, time flies 
won't be the last of it

flower w/ mochji, tyler serrani

now on spotify! https://open.spotify.com/track/3Ggotj8EKfuEwT339zpD43?si=BzgE55WkQciYmlvFrRw24g

yungspoiler:
www.youtube.com/channel/UCEvx72i83Z83UmolxnqQQ9Q

over u (prod. yungspoiler)

prod. alisynn + vaeo
mix and master by KBL + anem0s

I love you more than anybody on this goddamn earth 
Know you got so many options 
I don’t wanna be that toxic, but could you come home tonight
Why do I feel this shake in my lungs
I’m exhausted
Gimmie that 15 minutes
How did I fuck on ur bitch
I did it

Bitch im the one
Why you never wanna make time for me
Stuck to my guns
All i ever wanted was honesty
Bite all on my face, baby
Don’t do me that way
You know I love you
No offense
I liked fucking you more as a friend
Out my body
Don’t care where it ends
This shit killing me slow and I love it
I been a petty bitch since you met me, you know i’m not above it
Yeah I got six days till I-
Six days till I say fuck it and vanish
I can’t make no time for that
Say you love me, I’m sorry i dipped off
I just fucked on your friend cuz you pissed me off
only been 3 days, had to cut you off
I got a whole lot of drugs in this room if i take all this shit you won’t see me again 

I can’t move slow
She a bad bitch, I know

I love you more than anybody on this goddamn earth 
Know you got so many options 
I don’t wanna be that toxic, but could you come home tonight
Why do I feel this shake in my lungs
I’m exhausted
Gimmie that 15 minutes
How did I fuck on ur bitch
I did it

love actually ft vaeo

(Verse 1)
Met you in the corner of a crowded room,
Laughin’ like the world don’t owe you truth,
Said you weren’t lookin’ for a thing to keep,
Just a moment, just a drink, just company.
You told me stories with your eyes half-closed,
‘Bout a past you never really let go,
I should’ve heard the warning in your tone,
But I leaned in anyway, I should’ve known.

(Pre-Chorus)
You said, “Don’t read too much into me,”
But you held my hand like it meant something.
I was counting signs, you were counting drinks,
Guess we weren’t playin’ on the same team.

(Chorus)
So don’t call me late when you’re missin’ sleep,
Don’t say my name like it’s yours to keep,
Don’t act surprised when I finally leave,
You can’t take my heart and return it weak.
If it’s just a night, then say it clear,
If it’s not forever, don’t pull me near,
If you’re gonna go, then go, don’t stare—
Say what you mean, or just leave it there.

(Verse 2)
Saw you again with your “just a friend,”
Same old smile, different story then,
You said I’m trippin’, said I read it wrong,
Funny how I knew it all along.
You move like love but talk like none,
Say you hate labels but you use them when
It benefits the way you’re seen,
Guess honesty don’t fit your jeans.

(Pre-Chorus)
You swear it’s not what it looks like now,
But I’ve seen this scene, I know the lines by heart.
You say I’m free, but you pull me back,
Like a habit you don’t wanna quit yet.

(Chorus)
So don’t call me late when you’re missin’ sleep,
Don’t say my name like it’s yours to keep,
Don’t act surprised when I finally leave,
You can’t take my heart and return it weak.
If it’s just a night, then say it clear,
If it’s not forever, don’t pull me near,
If you’re gonna go, then go, don’t stare—
Say what you mean, or just leave it there.

(Bridge)
I’m not your maybe, not your in-between,
Not your secret you don’t wanna be seen,
If you want love, then love me loud,
If you don’t, don’t drag me down.

(Final Chorus)
So don’t hold me close just to let me fall,
Don’t make promises you won’t recall,
Don’t play innocent like I’m the fool,
I gave you honest, you gave me rules.
If it’s just a night, then say it clear,
If it’s not forever, don’t pull me near,
If you’re gonna go, then go, don’t stare—
Say what you mean,
Or just leave it there.

Leave It There

@oldcollin
human resources, music trillionaire