near finished (and kinda boring) track from 2016. i was attempting to write an album then but it didn't go anywhere. become surrounded by and rays were a part of that project

Slowdrift [2016]

matryoshka

wetdream

*untitled*

2024 11 19 1131 sorry sorry sorry sorry

saxophone done by https://soundcloud.com/5phere

go to sleep
dream your dream
i'll lie awake
in empty scenes

shattered glass
all on the floor
the choice is to hurt you
or feel ignored

i'll take all your compliments
addiction is obvious
i'm clingy and volatile
and snap at the seams

but what if i hurt you
and what if you hurt me
i can't help but wonder
my silence to your state of mind

state of mind

how hard is it to heal?
cut the shit, how do you feel?
do i kill you in your sleep?
or is that your secret to keep?



paradox, paradigm
my life dissolves before my eyes
lions wait in silent halls
and pounce on the dragons that break the waltz

and it isn't safe for you
cause somebody hates you
and somebody wants you
but can't decide

cuz if it'll hurt you
and if you don't listen
it's hard to imagine
the silence to your state of mind

state of mind

when will you shut the door
tangled wires still lace the floor
do i keep you up at night
or are these nightmares only mine?


go repent, feel content
i'll beg and plead to the friends that left
trench beneath the silent sky
all looking above to the heavens high

and is there an answer
to keep things unanswered
without hidden reasons
that i can't find

cause part of me's certain
that you're only hurting
yourself with that closure
that silence to our states of mind

state of mind



fall asleep, softly dream
i'll keep you safe but distantly
don't forget, i wish you well
even if you want me to burn in hell

there's no hope of confluence
and no further compliments
i'm clinging to nothing
it's going awry

but if you can tell me
and if i can hear you
if we break the silence
the tension on our state of mind

state of mind

the great silence [feat. 5phere]

dated

thought i saw you in the mirror
'fore i saw you face to face
now i think that we can hear you
when you're oh so far away

now my family and yours can meet
in our neighboring houses on neighboring streets
but the backyard between us stretches on for miles

and so we'll go to
where the grass is greener
it's not that far away
and i will hope the
tunnels stretch between us
but i don't know what to say

and i'll graze on greener pastures as you gaze across the sky
there's a house there in the woods in a computer in our minds
and i contemplate to hold you here but scared that you will hurt this time
i don't know why, i don't know why


thought i wasn't worth a thought
and that i'd slowly drift away
now i'm listening to love songs
and i finally feel that way

i'm scared that one day i'll wake up crying
i feel at fault every time you're dying but
every cloud conceals its brightest day

so then i'll go to
where the grass is greener
it's not that far away
and we will hope the
tunnels stretch between us
but you don't know what to say

will you reach your paws to catch me as i'm falling from the sky
in our house here in the woods in your computer in my mind
as i contemplate to lean on you, i'm scared that this is the last time
i don't know why, i don't know why

thought i'd never have a love
and it would always be that way
now i'm clinging to you closely
knowing it will be okay

i hope that one day across the sky
where the birds all sing and the colors fly
and you'll turn to me and whisper in my ear

that when you think of me
i'm a dandelion seed
i will float along your breeze
i will follow in your lead
will you trust me?
can you trust me?

grass

im rly rly rly sorry

lyrics:

stay up past 12 again
hold the knife in your hands
scrape it on your hip
you could never bring yourself to do it

your selfish and a narcissist
thats what my mom told me at sixteen
guess i internalized it a bit
im jealous of u cuz u arent me

my life is a dark fountain

my life is a dark fountain

my life is a dark fountain

my life is a dark fountain

my life is a dark fountain

my life is a dark fountain

my life is a dark fountain

my life is a dark fountain

my life is a dark-

2024 11 19 1131 sorry sorry sorry sorry

orange cat named patches